Hmmm, I started to type “to help keep this a bit more organized …” and then I stopped myself. Another Limitation.
Fuck it.
I’m Claiming this first spot for links to my own journal entries about walking the Path of Smoke. My Will Be Done.
I’ll update it as I create the journal entries, adding more as time goes on.
SWIMMING THROUGH THE SEA OF ETERNAL DARKNESS
As a fellow BALGrog, I keep up with E.A.'s YouTube channel.
I remember watching Kurtis Joseph’s video interview with E.A. about the Path of Smoke and his difficulty in bringing this Ahrimanic current forward.
At the time, I was feeling called back to Sumer and Babylon, trying to understand what the spirits I was working closely with were trying to teach me.
You see, I’ve always wondered …
Where did this all get fucked up?
Where did the people who are closing the cage on us tighter and tighter every day start all this bullshit?
My own personal gnosis lead me to Sumer and Babylon.
During my research and the many talks I’ve had with my own “Brothers and Sisters of the Spirit”, I understood that the Sumerians respected all of the gods, both light and dark, and understood they all had a place within the totality of creation.
The Sumerians also recognized that we came from the Abyss, which they called Abzu. Abzu was often viewed as the consort of the great dragon-goddess Tiamat, the Mother of All Creation.
Abzu and Tiamat were seen as two great seas whose waters had merged into one.
“And there waters were as one.” That’s the phrase that leapt out at me and stuck firmly in my mind.
I didn’t realize it at the time, but it became a very important magickal technique that has allowed me to make tremendous progress in a short period of time.
My research and gnosis helped me see that the first attempts at creating a monotheistic religion-based control structure seems to have started in Babylon.
Babylon is where we find Marduk (or rather the people who worshipped and represented Marduk) claiming the Fifty Names of the other gods as his own names.
In other words, the people who represented Marduk claimed that the Fifty Names of the other gods were simply other names for Marduk so they could usurp their power and add it to Marduk.
And this seems to be where the religious wars began.
I can’t prove this historically and I don’t feel the need to. It was a personal answer for me and it taught me what I needed to know to take yet another step down my path.
So that’s where I was at the time I first watched Kurtis Joseph’s video interview with E.A.
I immediately thought “Eh, not for me.”
Don’t get me wrong, I find Persia and the idea of Persian magick intellectually interesting, but all of the emphasis on the dark shit really turned me off.
You see, I don’t consider myself a very dark or edgy person. I certainly don’t fit in with the image of E.A. and Timothy. They’re more hardcore than I am.
And Kurtis looked pretty hardcore, too. Hell, he even called himself a “harcore black magickian”.
Hell, Miss Piggy is more hardcore than I am. lol
But Ahriman had other plans for me.
One night, several weeks before Kurtis released his book, “The Black Magick of Ahriman” …
Ahriman showed up in my dream.
All I remember was a brief flash of me performing a full evocation ritual for Ahriman within my dream and the feeling that we had a pleasant and friendly conversation.
I still can’t remember the content of that dream, but my close spiritual companions, Inanna and Utu, told me it would unlock for me when the time was right.
I trust them very deeply, so I accepted it and carried on.
I had two more visits from Ahriman before Kurtis released the book.
Ahriman also told me the dream would unlock when I was ready for it. He told me I should purchase Kurtis’ book so that I would have it when I was ready to work with him.
I honestly thought that would take me another 2 to 5 years before I was ready for that work.
You see, I was being prepared to work my way up through the Babili, the Babylonian counterpart to the Tree of Life.
I was invited to work through it so I could understand that what we call physical reality is nothing more than an illusion and that the truth lies within the Abzu, the Abyss.
When I physically died for a brief moment seven years ago, I experienced myself as the “Source of All Things”. I was the only thing within the Darkness and yet I was not alone. I felt completely connected to everything.
I was “Me”, but I was not the human “Me”. I was Consciousness, but the human mask and all of it’s concerns had fallen away.
I’ve thought about that experience and the only thing I could call myself, if you were there and could ask me, was simply “I AM”.
I came to call that Darkness the “Void”. It seemed fitting.
I’ve returned to the Void through my own form of mental soul travel and experienced myself consciously and purposefully as “I AM”. And I brought that essence back into me when I returned to my body.
I now believe this was my first steps toward experiencing something close to a possession.
For four hours, I was not my human self. I was something different. It was my Will merged with the essence of “I AM”.
I still remember how odd my physical body felt and how slow I had to move to get it to work right. It’s like I forgot how to drive the meat suit. lol
I looked at my hand, opened and closed it several times, and thought “How odd this physical body feels. It is so heavy.”
After these experiences, I believed I was being prepared to experience myself as the merging of “I AM” with Abzu, the Abyss, to experience my True Self as “The One”. And there were waters were as one.
I was also guided back to ancient astrology so I could harness the power of the planets as the ancient sorcerers did. I was told it would take me years to create these planetary talismans, but it would bring the great power I needed to help change our world.
So that’s the journey I found myself preparing for when Ahriman showed up in my life.
When the pre-order for “The Black Magick of Ahriman” became available … Ahriman, Inanna, and Utu encouraged me to pre-order it.
I still wasn’t ready for it, but it would be better for me to get it while it was easily available. And they provided the money for me so I didn’t even feel it.
So I pre-ordered the book and started becoming a little more interested in what Kurtis was saying.
I started interacting with Kurtis a bit on the forums. He was a warm and genuine person who encouraged others and shared his knowledge freely.
I still wasn’t resonating with the current, but I’ve learned to trust my spiritual companions. They’ve never lead me astray.
During this time, I made a conscious choice to invoke Inanna and Utu within me and to merge completely with them forever. I truly love them and I knew in my heart that we were all a part of “The One” anyway, so it seemed a very natural thing for me to do at this time.
And I did just that. I invoked them, pulling more of their energy into me than I had ever done before. And I simply intended for our energies to merge forver as I uttered “And our waters were as one.”
That experience made me ask Kurtis this question about what I was taught to call the “masks” of the gods and goddesses …
What’s Your Take on the Concept of Masks
If you read my first couple of posts in that thread, you’ll see the experience that came from seriously considering that question.
And suddenly, I was ready for the Path of Smoke.
In that one day, everything changed.
The years of work I was preparing myself for vanished. It was no longer necessary to go up through the Babili, the Ladder of Lights. It was no longer necessary for me to spend years crafting the planetary talismans.
No. I had done the work to transform myself and my path was now more direct. I could walk through the illusion to the Abyss.
And that’s the path I walk now … the Path of Smoke. And I will learn.
JOURNAL ENTRIES
May 13, 2017
The Consecration of My Black Book of Ahriman
May 14, 2017
Breathing In The Black Flames
Hard Qi Gong and It’s Effect on My Energy Work
Removing All Limitations
May 15, 2017
Another Day, Another Challenge
May 16, 2017
The Real Work Begins
May 17, 2017
Ahura Mazda Flees the Might of Zohak
May 18, 2017
Settling Into the Current
May 19, 2017
The Power Flows
May 20, 2017
A Nocturnal Visitor
May 21, 2017
Started Practicing Kunda Yoga Today
May 22, 2017
First Day of Full Kunda Yoga Practice
May 23, 2017
Shopping in Nature … and a Conversation with Papa Legba
May 24, 2017
A Gift from Sovar
May 25, 2017
When A Peaceful Man Goes to War
could not understand people. I could not understand why they were so content to live they way they were. I was hating everything in my path, the buildings, shops, classrooms, elevators, school, shops almost everything. This had an effect on me and i started turning away from the world. Over time as i continued performing the rite i was hating almost everything, especially music but understand that for me to hate something, something was always revealed to me. Eg. Like in the example of school, it was how we were treated like caged children, how we were being fed like babies, i felt like leaving the school to stay outside in my own apartment where i can cook for myself. I was craving independence from parental bodies.