I think I’m beginning to grasp this … at least, the little piece of it this human mind can work with.
While I was running errands, I was pondering this.
And the dots seem to be connecting.
@KurtisJoseph … check me on this and see if this is close enough.
The No-Thing … our Truest Essence … is a Conscious Field of Infinite Possibilities. And that’s immediately wrong because I had to limit it to a Field of Some-Thing to even talk about it.
I guess the only words that describe it is Infinite and Eternal Darkness. All Possibilities Unmanifested.
I think that’s as close as I can get in human words right now. Right track?
As I was sitting waiting on my takeout order at a restaurant, something clicked into place.
I think it came with the realization that the real work is to peel away the layers of the Self … until the final layer … the final model that our human mind can conceive … the Self itself … is dissolved back into the Infinite and Eternal Darkness.
I had this come to me in meditation the other day …
“Know your Self. And then let it go.”
When I had that realization snap into place, I felt an intense pressure building up in my body. I’ve come to recognize this as a blockage preventing the kundalini from flowing. So I just breathed and released.
About three breaths in, I started having an experience I can only describe as this physical world starting to fade away and spots of shadow bleeding through. I could see it clearly with my eyes open.
I often see this kind of grayscale strobing when I’m working on my Third Eye chakra. I occassionally see a light blue, purple, or indigo strobing, but most of it is just grayscale, like varying patterns of light to dark.
But I’ve never experienced it with my eyes wide open.
When I got home, this world seemed to fade even further away. Colors weren’t as bright. Light wasn’t as bright. And there was a darkness over everything.
Edit: That’s not right. The Light that forms the Things in the physical world weren’t bleeding through the Darkness. The Darkness was more real.
When I looked at my girlfriend, she didn’t seem as real to me and I clearly saw an aura of darker shadow around her.
Edit: I think I scared her when I tried to describe my experience to her. I understand … but this is my journey. I accept that.
It reminds me of the Matrix when Neo sees the code behind the world and the world begins to fade away as the illusion it really is.
This should terrify me as a human being, but it doesn’t.
Kurtis, in the video interview with Eric, you said that the darkness within your temple follows you everywhere you go and is the only thing you see. Is this the kind of experience you were talking about?
Now I understand why most people fear the Darkness. They catch of glimpse of the Truth and run back to the Light, to hide in their comforting Illusion of Self. And yet, therein lies their Prison.