Mulberry's "destroy an unwanted connection / relationship using a poppet" tutorial

The fundamental technique here is “sympathetic magick” also called low magick, this is feminine, emotional magick, you could consider it to be of the old ways. It’s freeform and not ceremonial, so there’s room to edit and make it yours.

First of all, lets put this in context:

This poppet spell was designed to kill the pain of a lustful attraction that was unable to be fulfilled, which could be seen astrally as cords between the lower energy centers of myself and the target, who was a former lover.
I fancied myself in love but knew I mostly just wanted to fuck his brains out when I’m honest. :smiling_imp:
I wanted to stop wanting him.

At the same time this also kills off his thinking about me, as, as we know having someone think about yo makes you thin of them, and that’s not what I want here. It’s a death spell for the entire relationship for both sides.

This relies mostly on nothing but yourself, your emotions, with a few simple tools and kitchen ingredients. The principle magickal ingredient is Amaranth flowers, of the variety “Love Lies Bleeding” which carries the energy of forgetfulness, ad that is what is being heavily leveraged in this spell. I bought some dried from etsy at the time, and since then I have grown it.
I got this info from Cunningham’s Encyclopedia of Magickal Herbs: a staple on the shelf any witch, imo.

Amaranth var Love Lies Bleeding:

What is “Sympathetic Magick”? … bit about that here:

So you are creating a link that doesn’t just represent the thing you want to affect, it IS the thing.
You must convince yourself of this, so that what happens to the poppet happens to the thing. In this case, the thing is the relationship, not a person.

More on how to make poppets here, including a link to a very good video on yt about it:

With the background set, this is my process, and I realise I only explained it in brief on BALG before, here:

I refer to it from time to time, so here it is in full:

Destroy a Relationship Poppet Spell

The entire operation is magickal, from the first intention to perform it until you walk away. As soon as you resolve to do it, know it has started, and the relationship linking you is already starting to dissolve.

TL;DR version:

  1. Make and enchant a poppet made of tallow or wax to represent the relationship. It must contain Love Lies Bleeding. Set the enchantment that this poppet IS the relationship, and due to the herb, the relationship is fading and being forgotten.
  2. See the poppet relationship as dead: Bury the poppet in the Earth so that it’s energy returns to the cycle of life.


Set the mood: emotions are important and music can help keep the enery in the right place.

I do this in the kitchen, and I clean the space and put on some good “fuck off” breakup music on a loop. Not spotify with ads, probably the same song with the right energy on loop.
The last time I posted about this I was using Three Days Grace “I don’t Care”, today I would use Solar Fake “I don’t want you in here”. Use what works for your energy to get it into full rejection mode.

Set up Ingredients and build the poppet:

You are enchanting it to purpose at the same time that you make it. This work you put into it is build it energetically as well as physically. Stay focused and on target the whole time. Listen to the music, see the link fading to nothing.

I like to make these out of a base of lard, which is cheap and accessible, or palm or soy wax,or coconut oil. Both are biodegradable, which is important: you want it to either rot or be edible without harm for wildlife.

Amaranth : Love Lies Bleeding is the only must

Optional other herbs I’ve used:

  • Lavender (healing and soothing)
  • Chamomile (soothing)
  • Echinacea (healing and builds natural protection)

You can use any shape, but I went out and bought a heart cookie cutter mold. It’s quite emotive :slight_smile:

Steps to make the poppet. While staying in the mood.

Super detailed version:

  1. Prepare the mold. On a smooth surface like a salad plate, set the mold and seal it to the surface. Play dough is good for this. I like candle sealer putter the best. Maybe polymer clay. (Not modeling clay as it melts and doesn’t stay sealed. )
  2. Melt 2 or 3 tablespoons of the fat/wax in a saucepan on really low heat. Stir in a few pinches of the herbs intentionally one by one. (you don’t need much, just enough for the mold)
  3. Enchant the melted wax. Place your dominant hand over the pot (cauldron) and declare your intent.
    Something like: "As this poppet returns to the Earth so the link between us withers and dissolves, gently and completley, without pain, all suffering melts away."
  4. Stir the mix until you feel you have firmly and completely placed all the energy into the wax. You will feel it when it is ready. Dance to the music and add it’s energy into the mix, fill the kitchen with the scent of freedom.
  5. (If it smokes, turn the heat down. Don’t let it get too hot. or the hrbs will burn and that will annoy you and upset the energy balance, who knows what that would do.)
  6. Carefully pour the mix into the cookie mold. Let it cool and set. You can put it in the fridge if you like. If it’s lard and the weather is waem you will want to do that.
    At this point you can take a break and turn of the music. Know it’s still working as it sets. The Amaranth and herbs are starting to work the relationship as intended already.
  7. When it’s set, use a knife to run around the edge of the mold and turn it out.
  8. Now see that it has died. Wrap it in funeral shrouds: it is now dead and must be buried with honor, as the dead should be respected. I use kitchen towel or loo roll (toilet paper) to wrap it.
    (It’s sad, you are allowed to grieve, as one should for the dead. It’s ok to think about what was good and be sad that it is gone. It might feel kind of like a mouse that died in your house that you wrapped and are taking outside to bury. It’s a bit pathetic and there’s a sense of loss. )
  9. Get a trowel, and solemnly walk with the dead bundle to the burial site. Bury it a foot deep. Cover it with a stone if you wish. Give a moments silence.
  10. Walk away without looking back.

Remember that by the time the dead thing has gone (might be very quick if animals dig it up and eat it. which they might, this counts and means nature didn’t want you to suffer longer) … by the time it’s gone the link and your feelings will have disappeared.


I got no idea of where or how I’ll get that herb, but THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS!!!

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Can this help if the other person is obsessed with me while i have no interest??

I haven’t tried it that way, but I think it would.

Adjust it so that as you’re stirring the melted wax, mix into yours the energy of the dissolved link causing their stored energy to also be drawn away into forgetfulness. INTEND that they forget about you. Then that will be built into the poppet as well and also continue working as the poppet decays into the ground.


Thank you, I will do that.


Wow. What a well made tutorial! Thank you so much for this incredibly clear contribution.

I don’t need to sever a relationship right now, but I learned a lot about poppets and sympathetic magick in general from your post here. (I also think the music you recommend is cool!)

I thank you for stirring my interest in poppets in general. They are so cool! They make me think of some of the fantasy movies I used to like. There’s just a charm to it that’s appealing.

When EA said on a livestream that old folk and witch magick often outperforms a lot of modern magick, is this the type of thing he was referring to? “Low magick”? It seems like very natural, straightforward magick. It makes a lot of sense.

A lot of the witchcraft books I grew up around in Massachusetts just basically had scans of random old grimoires. They were interesting looking, but didn’t teach things in such a usable format. I guess many were novelties more than anything else.


I think old grimoires are literally someone’s pauschal notes, not designed as reference books or primers, so they assume you already know how it all works and don’t explain.

There’s even a name for this: “blinding”. Like adding a textual key, the book becomes deliberately useless unless you know what the things translate to, what the symbology means, and for that you need someone else who knows to tell you.

This is where “initiation” comes in: it’s being taught these codes so you can understand the grimoires. Which is why today you don’t need to initiate into a current that has published books that explain it all at face value. You don’t need any orders, and you don’t need to assume people have secrets you have to jump through hoops to learn.

For the first time in millennia all the best info is free. What’s not free is the work to get practiced.


I bet you must be a very good chef too.


Maybe cook… I can cook well enough.

Now I wish I knew what I meant by “pauschal notes”. Thanks, autocarrot. :joy:


Maybe you meant Partial Notes.