Fallen_Human's Magical - Journal

That’s fucking awesome! I saw a lion!

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April 1st 2022

Evocation of King Zagan






April 4th 2022

Before I meditated: I decided this is the day I am going to start taking only cold showers and boy let me tell you beside that it was insane and made me shiffer and howl like a wolf under the water, I felt so energized and much more better than when I take my warm-hot showers.

Meditation; I did two types of: - One by sitting in silence and focusing on my breathing for 15 minutes and did another meditation chant; Chanting Shiva’s mantra “Aum Namah ShivaYa” for 108 times. (not sure how long it took cuz i didnt care about that).

Feelings:empowered and relaxed. I can also feel the benefits of that on all my chakras but specially my third eye.

Finally, actually decided to drop all products that contain fluoride. Going to stop eating meat, except fish (sushi) and gonna minimize it as much as possible since its the only remaining product that contain fluoride. May the new routine and purpose begin.

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According to Guru swamiji … there is this “password he channeled by Sadashivatva” that makes you claim who you truly are. It basically makes you become one with “the cosmos” according to him.

However, its not meant to chanted as a mantra but as a declaration when manifesting something which is why he calls it “password”.

“Aum Nitya NanDa Maha Sadah Shebo Ham”

Be Blessed

April 5th 2022

Invocation of Duchess Gremory

Ritual notes:

  • She manifested in the smoke. Riding what looked like a demonic dog or tiger. Certainly, it did not look like a camel. I will be posting a picture out of few that I took that shows what I’m talking about.

  • She gave me a familiar; Told me his name and gave me a sigil I can use to summon him.

  • She came really fast. Wanted me to stop chanting and talk. Not that she is straight to the point but she did not want to waste her time. I hated that because i wasn’t fully in TGS and I told her im afraid I wont be able to hear you or perceive you. Suddenly, I hear (more so like my own thought) “But you can hear and you are” The only thing that made me believe I was able to hear her even though im not fully meditated nor in trance is that the wording was of 3rd person.

  • After that for some reason I started to jump into what I’d like from her and she said something as: are you not even going to introduce yourself and just order me? I then smiled, and said, you are right. I apologize.

Note: further discussion occurred then I made my requests and she agreed. but I am not going to type the whole experience nor conversation because this is just notes.

Feelings: Warm, Safe, Cared about, aroused, and eloquence from her side.

Definitely going to be calling her more, and I feel so bad for not having known her way earlier in my journey.

Pictures of the incense during the ritual:



Be Blessed

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April 6th 2022

Dream and Wake: Used Turmeric on my ajna and throat chakra to detox them from fluoride and after half an hour felt so drained and went to bed. I kept dreaming different dreams. Unfortunately, I cant remember any, but i know i had lots of dreams. Side note: when i woke up. It was like I was out of my body. I can see around me and my mind is conscious but my body is not functioning. I just couldn’t move. I had to push so hard to be able to move. It felt like i had to back to my core so i can wake up.

Sensations:

When i applied the turmeric on my ajna, i felt as if something in the back of my head burning. It started from my ajna all the way to the back like a straight line. It was weird.
My throat is so itchy and burning as well.

Extra notes from my last ritual (Gremory): I asked her to come to me in my dreams, and she told me even if she did and she will, I won’t be able to remember. And, now I do feel like through the multiple dreams i had, I did have an encounter with a spirit but i cannot remember. She was right.

Be Blessed

April 7th 2022

Dream and Wake: 2nd day after using turmeric. I have been having lots of dreams. Dream paralysis. Suffocating, especially when i am half awake. It cant move my body. I feel like something is standing on me. Been getting thoughts about god a lot. Questioning his existence and if he is here then why the narcissist? I mean lets say hes here? why know exactly what is gonna happen and then be willing to put all these bunch of people in hell. Wait, whaat! yeah i know these thoughts just came out of no where.

Sensations:

My throat still burning. My ajna is not burning though. But, i feel how it wasnt fully open or activiated let me say, and that it is working. Its decalcifying the shit that was making me spiritually blind.

Extra notes: Honestly i am not sure what I want to do next or what i should do. I am lost. I feel like a calling that is asking me to work on my other chakras. I dont think their balanced or that I have traumas that I need to work on because apparently i have not.

Be Blessed

Notes to my readers

If you have questions about anything in this journal, feel free to check out my question thread for the journal here:

If you have any other comments (not questions) feel free to post them in the journal.

April 9th 2022

Ritual: Tonight I made an thank you offering to King Lucifer, King Azazel, and King Paimon. The candles are all the same height and brand. King Lucifer’s candle was burning slowly with low fire, but he confirmed he received it and enjoying when he used the wax to show himself. King Azazel finished his candle while the other two were only quarter gone. So, I ended up offering him another one. King paimon really enjoyed his offering.

I told them that this is a gratitude to them and that I seek nothing out of this offering. In the end, I felt refreshed, empowered. Looking forward to seeing what the future holds of workings with them.

Advise: Do not forget to thank those around you spiritual and mundane.

Be Blessed.

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April 11th 2022

Decided to use the search function … find some incantations posted by other members and try to put them to use. feeling like experimenting:

April 17th 2022

Called upon King Paimon. He came pretty fast. One of the things i asked him is to help me clear my mind and home from negative energies and spirits by his will and power. I come to BALG after ritual and this what i find:

Also, I wanted to added the bornless ritual to my future summoning ceremony and i remember mike bee wrote it somewhere:

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April 20 2022

Today is my birthday and I planning to set one spiritual goal to master before my next birthday which is rising kundalini. I found a post here in BALG about it and found the explanation and technique is really good. So i thought i should post it here in my journal.

" The Infernal Middle Pillar

The ‘Infernal Middle Pillar’ is a dynamic technique of stimulating the energy centres of the body.

This ritual has its origins with the Golden Dawn. It was felt, however, that the use of Hebrew names of power were not suitable for the Left Hand Path in all situations, so this version was devised. It has since become a favorite with Satanists that I have taught it to, and in some cases has replaced the original version altogether…for those of you unfamiliar with such rituals, it is the Western Magickal version of the eastern system of working with the subtle energy systems of the body.

The eastern system of working with the base chakra first and raising the ‘kundalini’ up through the energy centres to the crown chakra is advisable only under the guidance of an experienced Yoga master in most cases, as some of the techniques can be dangerous. The reason for this is that the energy in the base chakra is raw sexual energy, which is the psycho-spiritual equivalent of nitro glycerin. If the energy passes up to quickly through the chakras, and somehow gets stuck at one of the centres, it can cause obsessions, neurosis, or emotional imbalance.If the energy manages to blast its way through all the energy centers to the crown chakra. one may indeed receive ‘enlightenment’ or insanity, depending on individual responses.

The Middle Pillar ritual starts from the top (crown) and works-down through the centres and earths the energy (completes the circuit) at the feet. Since we start from the ‘divine’ energy sphere and draw the energy down through the centres, each one is purified and activated in a gentle and gradual way. Do not make the error of assuming that it is not potent, however. If performed correctly, it is very powerful. I had a student who was not quite himself at the time he performed this rite, and he collapsed! so another thing to be aware of is, one must be in good health when doing rites such as these, if you are uncertain of things such as heart, respiratory, and blood pressure etc, a trip to your doctor may be in order.

The benefits of the Middle Pillar are:

  • Activating the ‘divine source’(micro) within so as to begin uniting the microcosm with the macrocosm – or Chaos, the limitless light, the All, the No-thing.
  • The throat chakra is activated, which also is visualized extending up to the third eye (the psychic awareness center). This symbolizes ‘communication’ with the divine, which at the same time will hopefully reveal the many false illusionary thoughts we have regarding ‘reality’ and begin opening our psychic senses.
  • The third centre which covers the heart and solar plexus, when activated, begins modifying and balancing the emotions and feelings.
  • The fourth centre covers the pelvic and base chakras, and, when activated, releases the psycho-sexual energy, which can be used for Magick, charging Talismans, healing, Tantric Work, Invocations, and so on.
  • The fifth centre is at the feet. When activated, it earths the energies brought down and acts as an anchor for them, thereby stabilizing body and soul.

The Middle Pillar represents just that, the central pillar on the Kabbalisitic Tree of Life. (See reading list.)

Here is the Infernal Middle Pillar Ritual:

  1. Perform the Banishing Rite of the Dark Lord, or other opening.
  2. Visualize a bright sphere above the head (The thousand petaled lotus is one name given to this, thus it is viewed as brilliant white light)
  3. Vibrate “SATAN!” three or four times. Then imagine a shaft of white light descending down from the sphere, through your head to the nape of the neck where it widens into a sphere of light.
  4. Vibrate “CHORONZON!” three or four times (sphere is extended up and over the third eye).Visualize the shaft of light descending to the Solar plexus area, where it expands into another sphere of light.
  5. Vibrate “LUCIFER!” Three or four times. then again see the beam descend to the genital area, where it expands into another sphere of light.
  6. Vibrate “LILITH!” Three or four times. Finally the beam descends to the feet, to the final centre, as the sphere expands see it extending over your feet and under the earth.
  7. Vibrate “BELIAL!” Three or four times… stand for a while and ‘feel’ the effects on your energy system, most students find that this dynamic way of working with the energy centres brings immediate results.

After about six months of doing this ritual, you may begin to experience unusual phenomena. This is because you have been working with and activating previously unused energy centres. You may experience small or large floating lights. You may even have the occasional manifestation of astral entities. But I must stress that these phenomena are all harmless. They are only manifestations of the fact that you have been awakening your Astral senses. In the next lesson I will be giving you techniques of moving the energy that you have been activating with this ritual.

For those of you that are serious about cultivating magickal power a good format for daily practice would be as follows:

  1. Perform the Banishing of the Dark lord (or an opening of your choice)
  2. The Infernal Middle Pillar.
  3. Meditation and visualization exercises of your choice."

Copied from Basic Satanic Rites and Exercises

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" The Banishing Rite of the Dark Lord

All Magickal traditions teach a ‘clearing’ rite of some kind. Banishing rituals are not, as some ignorantly presume, to banish “evil” spirits from the magicians temple. Rather, their purpose is to remove all extraneous ‘vibrations’, energies, and/or mental thought forms not consistent with the aims of the magician. You are creating, with this rite, a focal point for the powers of darkness to manifest.

The inverse Pentagram of Earth is mentioned in this rite, I will provide links to material that contains all the forms of the Pentagram that you will ever need. More on this later.

I will give the bare bones of the ritual first, and then I will give the ‘inner’ work that must be going on within the Magician to make this rite (or indeed any other rite) effective. This is where all that practice with meditation and visualization is put to use in a ritual format. Here, summed up, are the benefits of the rite:

  • A method of ridding the mind of disturbing and obsessive thoughts.
  • Expanding the energy field of the body, while freeing it of negativity.
  • Cleansing the Aura of negative spiritual and emotional vibrations.
  • Putting the Divine spark, within, in contact with the Divine Hadit {Satan}, without.

Here now is the Banishing Rite of the Dark Lord, a revision of the Golden Dawn’s “Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram” using names more congenial to Satanists:

  1. Face any preferred direction. Visualize a bright white sphere above the head and vibrate: “AZAZEL!”
  2. Bring down the beam of light to the genitals and vibrate: “BELIAL!”
  3. Up to the middle of the chest, and across to the right shoulder. vibrate: “ASMODEUS!”
  4. To left shoulder, vibrate: “ASTAROTH!”
  5. Clasp hands at the chest, visualizing a bright red reverse pentagram upon the breast (or Hexagram of Alchemy. if known) vibrate: “BAPHOMET!” (or “BAPHO-METIS!”)
  6. Go to the West, draw a reverse Pentagram of earth… (note: the reverse Pentagram of Earth is drawn at all four quarters) vibrate. “LEVIATHAN!”
  7. Go to the South, draw Pentagram and vibrate, “SAMAEL!”
  8. Go to the East draw Pentagram and vibrate, “LUCIFER!”
  9. Go to the North, draw Pentagram and vibrate, “LILITH!”
  10. Return to centre of temple, with eyes closed you visualize the Daemons you have invoked, and the elemental energy’s flowing in from each quarter. Then say, “AROUND ME FLAME THE PENTAGRAMS, THE STAR OF FORCE AND FIRE, WITHIN MY BREAST THE ETERNAL ONE, THE INFINITE AND IMMORTAL STAR.”
  11. Repeat steps 1-5.

Explanations on the text:

Step one is self explanatory. To draw the cross of light (not the Xtian cross, let that be very clear) with your two fingers (middle and forefinger extended, other two fingers clasping thumb to palm of hand), visualize a beam of light following your finger tips to the areas of the body mentioned. The Cross is visualized as extending out to infinity. not stopping at the left or right shoulder and genitals but as an infinite line in all four directions, you! are the ‘star’ in the middle.

Regarding the Four Quarters (steps 6 to 9): You may change the order if you prefer. Start in the quarter that suits you best. Many Satanists start in the West. Others with a Luciferian bent may prefer to begin in the East, in which case you start with “LUCIFER!” Wherever you start, proceed anti-clockwise.

When drawing the Pentagram of Earth, it is visualized in flaming red as you draw it before you, arm outstretched (use Dagger if you have) and then stab the centre as you vibrate the Daemon’s name. Visualize the Daemons as follows:

  • Leviathan: Before you is a great dark sea, and from it rises a huge serpent which towers over you, a vast ancient intelligence shines from its eyes.
  • Samael: A tall figure in hue of darkest pitch, surrounded by tongues of fire, (He is known as Samael the Black.)
  • Lucifer: An Hermaphrodite/Angelic figure suffused with light and wisdom, the force of which flows in to the temple.
  • Lilith: A tall, aggressive looking woman, wearing a long black dress, with long dark hair and eyes of fiery red, pictured against a backdrop of rocky, mostly-barren mountainside, with only patches of green here and there.

These visualizations are not written in stone, but are a stepping stone to facilitate communion. The Daemons will give you their own images peculiar to you in time.

Vibration of infernal names: Here is how to vibrate the names across the Astral planes, which summons the energies to your temple of art. When performing the cross, inhale deeply while visualizing the energy of the universe traveling through your nose, down deep into your body, through your feet deep into the centre of the Earth. When exhaling you bring it back up through your body and vibrate eg: “AAAAAAZAAAAAAAAAZEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLL!!!” while feeling the area of the body vibrating to the sound of the name. When projecting the name at the quarters, you visualize the whole area in front of you, to the ends of the universe being shaken and resonating to the sound of the names, as the power comes back (this has to be experienced to fully know what I mean here) visualize your whole body vibrating as well.

Pentagrams: Here are online copies of Crowley’s Liber O and Liber V vel Reguli. Liber O has all the point-up versions of the Pentagram, and Liber V vel Reguli has all the point-down (inverse) Pentagrams needed for this work. Be careful and make sure you know which Pentagrams are which. The rituals that they are taken from are not in the same sequence as ‘normal’ elemental workings (Look and you will see what I mean.) For now, all I want you to do is be familiar with all the various form of the Pentagram. But don’t let this stop you reading the rest of Crowleys notes. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask.

As you can see, this simple rite has a lot of inner work that must be practiced to achieve the effect this rite was created for. This is only the beginning, but there is much here to digest. It is a good practice to do your Banishing rite first, and then practice the various meditations and techniques of your choice. There is a great deal more that I must comment on, but I think you have enough to go on for now.

So, practice this ritual until it is committed to memory, There is nothing wrong with using cheat notes while learning, but ideally you should soon reach a stage where this is not needed.

Of course, all rituals of this sort can be altered to accommodate Deities and Daemons of ones own tradition, but you got to start somewhere, and to give all the possible variants of this ritual would create confusion, Thus, I have given the LHP version I was taught."

Copied from Basic Satanic Rites and Exercises

May 12th 2022

I wanted to get to know the name of my personal daemon, or what some refer to the holy guardian angel.
I picked up my tarot cards, shuffled and withdraw cards till i got a minor arcana. Each major arcana refer to a Hebrew letter. I took these letters and used gematria to identify the total number of these letters. Then used a website that you write the number and gives you every word that equals to that number. It gave me a number of 10 to 25 words or names. One of them catched my attention hard. In the islamic mythology of working with the jinn, there is this demon or jinn who is higher (meaning not lesser) angel or spirit. I viberated the name and right away i get goosebumps all over and felt that yes it is my personal daemon or as Muslims say Qareen.

On the other hand, lets say that was not my personal daemons name. In some cultures it is okay to give a name to your HGA or personal daemon and use it to call upon them and work with them.

I am definitely going to meditate on this. Feel free to share your thoughts.

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May 14th 2022

I remember working on initiating through the Klifot using:

However I remember I stopped somewhere between the 3rd to the 5 sphere because I had a very hurtful break-up. At the time i totally forgot about this and i dont think i linked my working to that. Now I am thinking it is linked, maybe.

Anyway, I am thinking to start initiating through the Qliphoth again, but from the beginning. This time following Vk’s book instead. The book is called, The Rites of Acharayim. And here is a picture of the sequence of initation as described by the book:

and as Vk shared this for free in his website, this is the link the book:

I’d also like to say that I just recently went back to working with the great and lawless King, Belial. I think he is the one pushing me to do the qliphothic initiation.
Note: the difference is, now I am married and as much as i want to do it: I am afraid I get divorced :smiley: :smiley:
I think i got traumatized. Any thoughts? Those who did it, tell me about your experience? if you were to summarize a brief explanation on each sphere experience, what would you include?

@Onion This made me wonder… in your journey, did you follow vk’s method or the thread here in BALG?

@Kish @mike_bee @DarkestKnight

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VK’s method, but the order was given to me by Belial

Mike Bee has left the forum

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I don’t touch VK’s stuff. I don’t trust it.

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wait waat ? mike bee left? why do you know?

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okay… so have u done the qliphothic working? cause I read qliphothic mediations and it says there will be an open portal. To me thats okay, but i have people who live with me so i dont know if her method suits me. any thoughts?