2/10/21
Ocat (Oh-kot)
This will not be your normal necromancy journal. If you’re interested in baneful workings, how to work with the dead in specifics, how to communicate with the dead or any of that, I recommend you 1- hit the search bar in the top right corner of the screen, and two seek out an entity associated with such works. I highly recommend Baron Samedi, he is the one who taught me how to call armies of the dead to me and how to task them, like everyone else does demons and angels- for my benefit. I honestly rarely do baneful work, October 31st was the last time, prior to that I had one working at the end of July for someone else, and before that we are talking around January of last year.
I am just way to self centered, to expend the energy it takes to do baneful workings, I’d prefer to just cut assholes out of my life and burn the bridges- so that I can work on my goals- unless there’s no other way, I’m simply not doing baneful works. I’ve garnered results every time I’ve bothered, but I’m fcking lazy. So once again, if that’s what you are after, this journal is not for you. Also as a side note, I no longer do rituals for others, so please don’t spam my inbox with requests or please contact so and so, or please do this or that. I either won’t answer because I think begging for shit is rude, or I’ll tell you I’m too busy and can’t do it. (It’s true, I am too busy- so go ahead and earn yourself a mute, won’t bother me and I warned ya…)
I also can’t make pictures with my mind, it’s called aphantasia- and no I don’t even get after images, so anything I see I know I saw. It’s rarely vivid and clear like everyone else’s journals, but… spirits of the dead have in the past looked to me as if they were physically here, physically audible- so I’m not sure what we can expect in this department. Maybe nothing when it comes to the entities, but maybe something. Time will tell.
Now that we know what this journal is not, lets talk about what it is.
Okay, that’s a little more like it. I know I’ve mentioned all over, that I’ve been able to see the spirits of the dead, from the time I was a small child. Pretty much as long as I can remember. I also have this nasty uncanny ability to pick up when someone is near death, regardless of if it’s health or accident related several days, to several weeks prior to their death. In fact, I’ve learned you don’t tell people to say their last good byes, thinking it’s the right thing to do, for a few reasons. 1. They never believe you. 2. They freak the fck out when that person dies a few days later. I’ve learned that some things are best left unsaid, and rare is the occasion I break my own rule now-a-days.
So what could I possibly be doing, if I can already communicate with the dead, and I have no interest in using them for baneful workings? Oh just everything else guys. You see, I spent most of my life fearing the death- like nearly, if not as much terrified of them, as I was shadow creatures and people. We already know I’ve spent the better half of the last year working on my fears and while I think I’ve got a handle on this one (I mean I did tell a dead spirit to FCK OFF, my first night in this apartment on 7/3/20) But the truth is I still fear to an extent. I don’t fear when I call them to me to make a bargain, I fear when I wake up and one is standing over me watching me sleep. I don’t fear death, but I do fear dying in a painful way, and suffering through it.
OH yeah. There’s that whole soul retrieval gig I’ve been doing for the living. I don’t know if I’ve said, but I’ve asked Samedi a dozen times about the next step. How do I help the dead that are stuck with my ability to heal. How do I help them become whole and cross over? Well, the bastard keeps ignoring me. Or rather, he did. I recently posted (or will since I’m writing these journals during my break for the forum) about how Samedi, Loki, Kalfu, Lilith and my ubi approached me for the next step in my path. I mean if you look at those names, it’s guaranteed to be a shit show right? So guaranteed, that I had to take a few days to think about it, maybe I’m good right where I am and I’m just bitching for shits and giggles, cuz well I have a VaJayJay, so what can you expect?
But I did figure out what I wanted, (Nope not telling, that’s my business.) and I did accept- and I had no idea what I was accepting or what we were going to be working on or anything. Spirits have this uncanny way of being clear you need to make a decision, while being totally cryptic assholes and not alluding to what any of the project is going to be. Just something, something about it’s worth your time, hurry up and get on board before the train passes you by. No guarantees on which if any of us will be leading the way, we’re just here to broker the deal yo.
So I was really surprised to find myself purchasing several necromancy books. I wasn’t really surprised that I already used most of the techniques, I mean hell I’ve got yin eyes (clairvoyance and seeing the dead are no, not the same thing- I didn’t know that either till last year, don’t sweat it)- I’ve read every damned topic in the necromancy category on Balg, including the ones that are not worth the time to open. I didn’t learn a damned thing last August when I did that, but I was hoping to. You see my communication is not 100%. Not when I have a specific target. I get about 75% accuracy with specific targets (using name alone or a picture of a living relative), and honestly I expect better than that. I should be able to pull the shade of the individual, even if they have long moved on, but currently… Nope, the ones that have moved on allude me still.
And, I want to know how to help them. Also, I’ve still only managed to not freak out once when I woke up with one standing over me- I haven’t had it happen since, but goodness knows one will eventually make it through my warding and I’ll have to deal with that yet again, and well. Why not deal with that head on and just get it out of the way? So shadow working is (no surprise) part of this adventure. I imagine I’ll take the time to write up some of the experiences I remember from the years past, and add them to my Pathworking My current Past Life journal - Pathworking My Current Past Life (Shadow Work), as I move through this. If I’m lucky, I’ll recall more of them than I currently do as we go. If not, eh well I can recall a few, though perhaps only one or two in enough detail to be worth writing about. I’ve created a new folder for this within that journal on my pc, but for sake of it’s more specific content than that journal, I am separating it on Balg. I know I don’t share even 1/4th of what I do with my friends, let alone the forum, but this one I’m really looking forward to, and I definitely want to track my progress.
So, what can we expect in this journal? After all that rambling… ah well.
“While invoking other Daemonic forces of death you are calling them through a filter. By opening the gate of Ocat, you are removing the filter, allowing the raw energy of divine source to imbue your ritual work.”
Connolly, S… Keys of Ocat: A Grimoire of Daemonolatry Nygromancye (p. 72). DB Publishing. Kindle Edition. - Amazon.com : keys of ocat
I’ve purchased and read Honoring Death, The Nuctermeron Gates, Necromantic Sacraments, Keys of Ocot, The Abyssal Angels Infernal Colopatiron Redux, as well as a physical copy of the Keys of Death, as the digital copy I purchased is lack luster and missing some of the keys which I am promised will be in my full colored physical version, scheduled to arrive at my door on Tuesday. All of these are by S. Connolly. I’ve also purchased and read The Necromancy, Path of the Descended Masters by C. Kendall. I’m not sure anything from this last book however, will appear here, I won’t swear that it won’t but I would not personally bank on it- I’m too pleased with the other resources at the moment, but we’ll see where I am lead as we go.
You see, I’m not a demonalator or religious by any means, in any way shape or form… but she caught me when she was talking about her struggles and her fears, growing up as a necromancy. I can relate to Connolly, and other than the fact her work has a clear religious take on it, everything jives. So while I will likely be slightly amending some of it, the bulk of it I can work exactly like it is. (For example I will not be using the ZD symbol.) I have a huge box of herbs coming on Tuesday from Amazon, cuz well they have this cool Choose your prime delivery day to save boxes, and if you pay attention, there’s certain dollar amounts that equate to $1 or $2 digital credits. I was able to purchase most of the books I wanted, just from my digital credits on Amazon, because most of my food comes from Amazon and I game that system like it’s going out of style. I’ll make one order 5 orders if that’s how many rewards I can get, and it doesn’t effect how many boxes come so- I like the system. I also like working with herbs and the hands on, and while most of the rootwork I do, the hands on is symbolic of the energy and intent you are using them for, I’m excited to get into it with the herbs. I’ve also been collecting Hecate trinkets, for no fcking reason other than they called to me. I’ve never worked with her, but sometimes things scream you’re name, so when I have digital credits… eh I can be a little loose in how I spend them, (A pendant and a scrying bowl, ordered on a random whim fairly recently) and it’s February, short month! Payday is just around the corner, already!
I’m also really excited about the gates and astral opportunities. I’ve learned how to project through a portal, but I keep wondering how to add more power, more energy to my workings, and low and behold. Connolly says open gates and thou shalt do so. Naturally I’ll be using Luna, as well as the banishing ritual I like from Ben Woodcroft, and I have a few other tricks up my sleeve, that I prefer to keep between me, myself and I- but I’ve never opened a gate in my home before. I would never have considered doing it a year ago even, so. I’m flipping excited about the new things. Oh and the merging with entities part. I’m a bit excited about that too. I’m not sure why since I’ve totally rejected invocation since I began walking my path, but hell. I merged with the shadow of someone very close to me a few months ago, or rather I allowed it and I’m not disappointed. I didn’t think it through at the time, I was projecting when it came up, but. Yeah I’m not disappointed in any way shape or form so. I’m looking forward to the gate openings and mediations to merge with the energy of entities and I BOUGHT A WAND.
Sorry. I generally think tools are not needed and all, and if the ground wasn’t covered in something like 8 inches of snow, plus piles from the plow trucks and all of that, I’d just go pick a stick, buy a dremmel and make one. I’ve not done a wand before, but I’ve done a staff and it was a lot of fun, so I can totes picture myself enjoying the wand creation process- even if it looks as shitty as my staff did, but alas. I’ll never find a stick out there unless I climb a tree, and guess what. I can’t see any trees around that have low enough branches to climb lmao. So I got on etsy and I ordered one. It’s clearly not solid wood, it’s got clear quartz crystals (ironically that is what Connolly recommends-but it’s complete coincidence) and some real shiny paint… but guess what? I love it and it’s not even here yet. It’s corny and I don’t even care, I already work with energy, so why not learn to draw it through and direct it with a wand. It can’t hurt me any and it wasn’t that expensive so, worst case scenario, it end sup as a ferret/cat toy or my son would probably think it was neat. I already have graveyard dirt, so no biggy there at that being an ingredient in most things, even if it was I’m familiar with how to get it, though the walk up the hill in the snow would not be fun. Thank goodness, I’m a hoarder with some things.
I’m really excited about the upcoming work. I don’t know if you were able to tell through all that rambling, (It’s called sarcasm, google it.) but I can’t wait till Tuesday when the bulk of my items will be here, and goodness knows most of my deliveries are kinda late in the evening but. I’ll probably spend the day, deciding exactly where I am starting, if I don’t obsess over it prior to that, some of the tinctures, oils and things take time to prepare, so I’ll have to go back over my books and make logical decisions and then I’m diving in. Head first cuz that’s what I do, so you better take a step back or I might splash on you, as I hope this will be a true necromantic journey and not just some fluff and buff surge down the path to more power, that I’ll come out the other side and I won’t even know how to use properly when I’m done. I’ve been waiting for quite literally months for the path to open up and now that it’s open, I intend to learn and grow and do- as much as possible while it’s in front of me.
Remember, I’m not doing this for the baneful skills, I could truly care less about combining necromancy and baneful workings at this point in my journey.
I also want to note, that I will try to remember to record the date at the top of each entry. I’m not going to be posting catch ups, to get it all to the current date- on purpose. I have several entries essentially ready to go, but I have a loose end, so for now I prefer to post each entry after the workings done, rather than as it’s done.
I know there’s more information in that book, but until it’s here I’m having an awful lot of fun working with what I do have.
You always make me feel better lol.
that’s my one of my passions so I’m glad I’m good at it