The Building Of The Demon-Self

Having a relationship with spirits and entities sometimes comes with benefits of becoming one of them. It is a transformation of your spirit and soul, rather than a transformation of your physical appearance, and it is preferable to have the ability to sense and feel energies to understand the concept and the actual changes of your spiritual body. These kind of experiences comes in different phases, very similar to building a tall skyscraper.

First Phase - The Foundation

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The first phase, for me, was to get used to the dark currents of the energy, which basically means that the spirits manifest in their darker spectrum. Getting used to the presence of darkness is essential to understand it and to accept it as a part of something bigger. That means the darkness is passive and benevolent within the presence, with no intentions to feed off of fear or other negative emotions connected to that current.

Fusing the core and commencing the first sod

With the ability to sense and feel, the process can be very graphic in nature and I was fully conscious and awake during the whole experience. The very first step was to “remove” my left eye – which seems to be connected to the core essence of the soul – and once it was removed, a compact energycurrent sipped out of my eyesocket. After a little while, that energy current went back into the socket and my eye was put back into place.

The next step of the first phase was a blood transfusion from Lilith, and it appeared as a sharp cut on my left heal with some kind of cord attached to the cut. A pulsating stream of blood went into me, and it was like an adrenalin rush that put me in ecstasy the moment I felt it in my body. It was so intense that it’s hard to explain the sensations from it.

The last step of the first phase was the transformation of my spiritual appearance and manifestation. If you ever read the book, or seen the movies of Mary Shelly’s Frankenstein, I can say the experience was pretty similar to that.

Second Phase – Building The Structure

This part of the demonic construction is extensive. My “succubus” laid the foundation of the demonic appearance of my spirit, starting with the horns. Using a sharpened tool similar to a scalpel, she cut open the upper sides of my forehead. Then she fused the horns to my forehead at the cuts on the sides. I felt an enormous heat where she put the horns, and she started to shape them like it was clay. To make sure the process worked as intended, she held my horns with her hands and pulled them back and forth. They were solid as a rock.

Once that was done, she started with my tail, and like the horns, it was fused to my tailbone. The tail were partly sewed to place, and the final stitches was removed with an enormous heat. And to make sure it was put to place correctly, she pulled my tail and asked me to move it by thought. I put my thought to it and saw my tail as an extension of my body, and it moved accordingly.

The construction of my wings was a complicated process. An extensive long cut at the back of the scapula bones were made by my “succubus”. The wings were, basically, stitched to place and an extensive heat was building up on the inside of my scapula bones. The stitches was manually removed, once the wings got functional. As this was a “construct”, the wings had a bat like appearance and feel to it.

There were also changes of my eyes, my teeths, my nose, my ears and my legs. But these parts are considered “minor” in comparison to the other three changes.

Third Phase – The Finishing Touches

Lilith continued the work my “succubus” started, by re-modelling the created parts to her liking. The biggest changes were made on the wings. She changed them completely and put feathers on them, and made them bigger.

The last work was made by an unknown deity, and the energy from it was very powerful. The process was the same as my “succubus” and Lilith, but with slightly more adjustments to the added body parts.

This process lasted for several weeks, so it’s hard to write every single detail of it. I know I left out a few things, just because it would be too long to read. The important parts of this experience is there.


Disclaimer: My experience doesn’t represent “truth” or a “fact” of any kind, but it represents my interpretations of it.

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May I ask, was this something that took place on the astral plane or something in person that you could feel, sense, and see? Just asking, your experience sounds interesting. I have undergone some demonic work of my own which I choose not to share publicly but I can relate to how it feels when demonic blood enters your body. It made me shake intensely and I had to be held still, but it felt indescribably good.

I too, was going thru all kinds of weird stuff that lasted probably like 2 months straight, where the spirits made alterations to my body. It happened so often that I eventually just kept listening to music or something when they appeared to do their things to me and I just sat there, working on the computer while being poked at, burned with invisible fire, pricked with phantom needles. But they didn’t seem to mind as it disctracted me and kept me quiet and still.

One of the last things I felt before this process was completed was a sensation of my back being cut open, like you described and then over the following days this feeling like someone was cutting into my back on both sides and tugging at me, and later on, like I literally had wings started to sprout up out of my back. I was so sick during that time so I didn’t even ask what that sensation was as, at that time, I had already been undergoing my own processes for several weeks and was physically drained, overheated, dizzy and nauseous from various demonic substances which shall remain unmentioned here entering my body, so I just tried to cope with it as best I could, went to bed early and laid there while they did their thing and never even asked about that part of the process.

But now you got me wondering if they may have attached wings to me because that’s the only way I knew how to describe it, like a pair of brand new wings were ripping thru my flesh and growing out of my back. And as I sit here typing, becoming aware and recalling the strange pains I felt on those days, I am feeling a very heavy weight on my back in those two spots, that oddly enough, feels like I have wings back there. Again, some of the stuff they were doing to me was so strange I felt it was better for me to just not ask what they were doing.

And Lilith was there as well, but for me, she was there during the beginning stages and you said she was with you during the very beginning and then the very end? With demons, some things, it really is best just to not ask or else risk being told something strange that you cannot comprehend, and I’m sure you know what I mean by that Succupedia. But there were quite a few times when I asked to lie in strange positions and I felt those tugging and pulling sensations and was fidgeting a lot and it made Lilith a little impatient with me at one point and she told me “Quit fidgeting!”

I said, I’m sorry but this feels really strange and it kinda hurts but I’ll try. So I fought it as best I could but then the sensations got even more uncomfortable and weird and I finally had to be put to sleep because my wiggling about was interfering with their work.

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It was both in the astral plane and on the “normal” level, and even in an in-between state. But I was always conscious and fully awake the whole time, except for one time where I fell asleep and woke up with physical pain on my left leg.

So I was able to sense and feel the changes during the whole process, sometimes with flashes of images to it.

I think that if you’re fully aware of whats happening on occasions like this, trusting them is more important than asking them questions of “why’s”. They know exactly what they’re doing, and they have their reasons for it. Relationship wise, they make us compatible to them on a spiritual level and it can be costly if you’re not 100% certain. And I’m certain it’s not made for this life, but more for the life after our human existence.

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Real demons do not have horns; the horns is just the representation of an occult concept. However, spirits tend to manifest in a way we can understand them which is usually what subconscious memories we possess. Rather than occult perception, not knowing what horns as a concept means is nothing more than the manifestation of the Judeo-Xian memory of demons.

Not to put you down, but just putting this out there with Respect to demonkind. They are very beautiful beings that look humanoid just like us, but more physically perfected in a number of ways.

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Did you read my disclaimer notification at the bottom of the picture?

Rather than occult perception, not knowing what horns as a concept means is nothing more than the manifestation of the Judeo-Xian memory of demons.

Horns has been represented long before Judaism and Christianity, and there are archaeological findings about worshiped deities with horns in Egypt as long back as 9600 BC.

Horns often represents masculinity, sexuality and fertility and there’s both known male and female deities with horns.

Each experiences to their own, right? Telling others what’s “wrong” or “right” within a personal and positive experience can put them down to fall pretty hard with it, and mess things up badly.

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Interesting, sounds very simular to entwining. A more suddle, longer process.

Did you read my disclaimer notification at the bottom of the picture?

Rather than occult perception, not knowing what horns as a concept means is nothing more than the manifestation of the Judeo-Xian memory of demons.

Horns has been represented long before Judaism and Christianity, and there are archaeological findings about worshiped deities with horns in Egypt as long back as 9600 BC.

Horns often represents masculinity, sexuality and fertility and there’s both known male and female deities with horns.

Each experiences to their own, right? Telling others what’s “wrong” or “right” within a personal and positive experience can put them down to fall pretty hard with it, and mess things up badly.[/quote]

No need to get emotional over my comment =) I’m just putting it out there so people do not get confused. There is a very big problem within the Judeo-Christian (xian) religions where people say “demon” and instantly think of a Red humanoid being with huge horns on its head.

Horns on the head were taken from prior cultures where one had shamans and witch doctors. Said shamans would wear some form of Helmet or Mask to imitate certain spirit animals which had horns. Different animals had different attributes like sexual virility, whereas the horns dont necessarily represent that. Shamans, medicine men, witch doctors are the oldest religions as various tribes spread throughout the world as they are the primitive ones.

Don’t take it hard. I’m simply doing my part to keep the Encroachment of Judeo-Xian (Jewish/Christlike pantheon of religions) faiths from spreading even if its only something happening on a subliminal level. If this is a part of your own work of art then great all to you. You do well to take on my advice so you can perfect your work of Art by:

  1. Ignoring what I said and just continuing to utilize said symbolism, meaning you are fine with buying into the Judeo-Xian paradigm… which at this point you will be susceptible to any magick or prayers simply because you symbolically tie into it…OR

  2. take my advice and add further symbolic associations as to why you are utilizing such symbology. This isn’t a Game. This is what draws the Fine line between Fiction and Non-fiction interplaying when it comes to magick interfacing with physical reality… because your symbolism will pan out a certain way… to make sense a certain way. Now of course that is all up to you. I was just simply doing my part.

I’ve been told it’s part of their energy body, and that shamans and ancient representations of horned gods were an attempt to draw on that - rather than the other way round. That’s UPG obviously, so feel free to ignore it.

They don’t all manifest with horns, but some will, others are noted for liking to have more than one head whenever possible, which again seems like it relates to a depper function of their energy, and not just some astral fashion statement. :slight_smile:

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[quote=“Biosynth, post:7, topic:7625”]Don’t take it hard. I’m simply doing my part to keep the Encroachment of Judeo-Xian (Jewish/Christlike pantheon of religions) faiths from spreading even if its only something happening on a subliminal level. If this is a part of your own work of art then great all to you. You do well to take on my advice so you can perfect your work of Art by:

  1. Ignoring what I said and just continuing to utilize said symbolism, meaning you are fine with buying into the Judeo-Xian paradigm… which at this point you will be susceptible to any magick or prayers simply because you symbolically tie into it…OR

  2. take my advice and add further symbolic associations as to why you are utilizing such symbology. This isn’t a Game. This is what draws the Fine line between Fiction and Non-fiction interplaying when it comes to magick interfacing with physical reality… because your symbolism will pan out a certain way… to make sense a certain way. Now of course that is all up to you. I was just simply doing my part.[/quote]

Why are you spreading your anti-Xtian agenda in my thread about an experience you obviously can’t relate to your own? Or have you experienced something similar to mine? If so, please do share it for me. Otherwise, your revert agenda is no better than the Xtians you despise so much.

Did you read my disclaimer notification at the bottom of the picture?

Rather than occult perception, not knowing what horns as a concept means is nothing more than the manifestation of the Judeo-Xian memory of demons.

Horns has been represented long before Judaism and Christianity, and there are archaeological findings about worshiped deities with horns in Egypt as long back as 9600 BC.

Horns often represents masculinity, sexuality and fertility and there’s both known male and female deities with horns.

Each experiences to their own, right? Telling others what’s “wrong” or “right” within a personal and positive experience can put them down to fall pretty hard with it, and mess things up badly.[/quote]

No need to get emotional over my comment =) I’m just putting it out there so people do not get confused. There is a very big problem within the Judeo-Christian (xian) religions where people say “demon” and instantly think of a Red humanoid being with huge horns on its head.

Horns on the head were taken from prior cultures where one had shamans and witch doctors. Said shamans would wear some form of Helmet or Mask to imitate certain spirit animals which had horns. Different animals had different attributes like sexual virility, whereas the horns dont necessarily represent that. Shamans, medicine men, witch doctors are the oldest religions as various tribes spread throughout the world as they are the primitive ones.

Don’t take it hard. I’m simply doing my part to keep the Encroachment of Judeo-Xian (Jewish/Christlike pantheon of religions) faiths from spreading even if its only something happening on a subliminal level. If this is a part of your own work of art then great all to you. You do well to take on my advice so you can perfect your work of Art by:

  1. Ignoring what I said and just continuing to utilize said symbolism, meaning you are fine with buying into the Judeo-Xian paradigm… which at this point you will be susceptible to any magick or prayers simply because you symbolically tie into it…OR

  2. take my advice and add further symbolic associations as to why you are utilizing such symbology. This isn’t a Game. This is what draws the Fine line between Fiction and Non-fiction interplaying when it comes to magick interfacing with physical reality… because your symbolism will pan out a certain way… to make sense a certain way. Now of course that is all up to you. I was just simply doing my part.[/quote]

By the way, In Ancient Mesopotamia, Egypt and many more Culture predating the Judeo-Christian one, Demon where Often showed with Animals Parts, like Horn, Birds Talon, or even Wings, Even the Gods were often showed with Animals Traits, Like the God Nergal who was depicted with The Body of a Lion. This was all Symbolic.

Christianity didn’t ‘‘put horn’’ on Demon, they just take the Concept of Horn and Animals Parts and make it Evil in Their Paradigm,

So in my own Opinion Using Horn is not Using the Judeo-Christian Paradigm, since it predate Judeo-Christianity by Thousand of Years.

1 Like

@succupedia again another awesome thread. I honestly think that this conventional wisdom from experience and revelations from your lady should be told to more. There is a lot of useful concepts when applied can empower the magician.

We all know the stories of how the sorcerer/wizard/mage/shaman(insert name for person using magick) had his spirit companion (servitor, succubus, fae, deva, djinn, familiar, many names for similar type of being). This enables the person to grow and gain more power, wisdom, knowledge among other things.

@biosynth The horns, wings, tail thing. Well I think its symbolic. It IS NOT a Judeo-Christian thing. As it was said there are many gods from prior to Abrahamic religions that depicted horns and animal like features. Of course when a religion of an empire takes over everything outside it becomes evil and forbidden. That being said. These beings can and will assume whatever form the operator has in their subconscious and/or what they choose. To state that assuming a form or being depicted with horns is an insult to them sounds silly and ignorant in my personal opinion.

Also consider the term demon was originally daemon, which was greek for messenger, helper, and teacher before modern religion.

2 Likes

While we are on the topic of the demon self and personal growth. I found this thread of an exercise that may be useful.

[url=http://becomealivinggod.com/forum/black-magick-the-left-hand-path/dark-self-~-exercise-from-azazel/]http://becomealivinggod.com/forum/black-magick-the-left-hand-path/dark-self-~-exercise-from-azazel/[/url]

Can you tell me more about the “removal” of the eye? And can one be prematurely demon? (Bad wording but makes some sense)

@Acaelus Please post an introduction in the Intro thread. It is one of the rules of this forum:

Just tell us a bit about yourself and any magical experience you may have so we may better be able to answer any questions.

Oh boy… Sometimes I wish I could just grant people visions but I understand why they are limited. My magicks have cost my in the physical, emotional, and mental regard. If the pale white light would just appear to you all but briefly that you might see the true histories.

The pale white light will strip away all hope and comfort from you as your soul is severed from your spirit and your mind emptied of all but visions of tragic pain. Then in the depths of unfathomable sorrow you shall be inducted into vengeance and wrath. When pain has shaken you to the core till your body itself shakes in subconscious terror, then you shall feel the demonic seed grow within you.

All the family you ever known brutally killed and tortured.

Wastelands of rotting corpses with rivers of blood.

Floating children facedown in the red currents.

Raving mad sons, daughters, mothers, and fathers, starving and wailing at the destruction of all they ever known.

Corruption and famine across the land, destitution and hopelessness across the horizon.

Why did they chose some and not others?

A few they took into their kingdom as they turned their back upon a forgotten world.

Merciless armies rule the land as tyrants bathe in bloodied riches.

And there are no good men.

Even the best of them have eaten flesh like a carnivous cannible.

Ghastly forms roam in the darkness and shadow, hungry for the weak.

None but the fiercest survive as men are reduced below animals.

Would that the tables of the Earth be flipped and the seas devour the land that the death and violence be washed away.

Cry and weep over the Earth oh saved one.

May tears come to your eye’s as a vision of the wailing masses awakens in your mind.

Hear the cries of billions forgotten.

Now rest in the stillness and unwritten upon darkness.

Let the void become your mind as the pain is washed away by a mysterious graceful rain.

Be at peace.

Anyone mind telling me if this is just my mind making this up or if it’s something more. So last night I asked lucifer to show me or tell me who the demon was that wanted to work with me. I chanted his enn then placed his sigil under my pillow and fell asleep. What happened after was quite odd. I had several dreams. The only one I can really remember is the one where apparently my mother, father and stepmother were all shot and killed. Funny enough my mother is about to be a cop so there’s always a risk of being shot. Anyway once the dream ended I woke up at around 5:00am and felt the space in my room feel so dark and kind of frightening. As if I wasn’t alone. Then all of a sudden a name popped into my head. Crocell. I saw his name on a sight a few days ago but didn’t think much of it. Fell back asleep then woke up to my cat legit just staring at me. Anyone mind telling me what the fuck this was?

I want to become a succubus can you help me

Welcome @Oceana_Sea. Please post an introduction in the NEW MAGICIAN AND INTRODUCTIONS area, and tell us about yourself and any experience you may have in magick. It is a rule of this forum.

Interesting process. Reminds me of psychic surgery, except not the stage illusion.

What I found particularly was the mention of the left eye. I’ve often felt some kind of spiritual element to my left eye, and this kind of leads me to think there might be something more to it than I thought before.

@succupedia mind helping me. What method did you use to evoke your first succubus.