My Qliphothic Journal - Pathworking from Gamaliel to Taumiel (Qliphothic Meditations) Update: 20-05-17

This isn’t anything special - this is just some portions of my journal being shown to others who are new to these spirits are currently working with the spheres of the Qliphoth. I am using Asenath Masons approach to these spirits before trying others first, as I felt it as a good idea to at least start with a very clear and solid set intructions to make my journey as smooth as possible. And to those who have read some of my other stuff, I know I have been inactive for a time but I will update my other journals in the days to come. However as I was recording my experience of the workind of today. I suddenly felt I should share some of it and without further ado here are some experiences I’ve had so far.

Note: The pathworking and the methods I use are within Qliphothic Meditations by Asenath Mason and due to copyright I can’t reveal the steps but the experiences are after all mine and therefore I am entitled to share them. I’ve chosen not to share some notes in there because I find them very disturbing and some of it are also very personal stuff to me, which I don’t feel comfortable sharing with the public at this point in time which hopefully you can understand. And I will say this, using Mason’s methods and workings appear to work suprisingly well so far. I have already completed the first sphere but none of those notes will be made public. Along with the experiences of each sphere I find are worthy sharing with you, will also include my interpretations of their meaning (when I find the time), I might also share what they lead to along with the end ritual at the end of each pathworking oc each sphere.

GAMALIEL - Pathworking

I managed to get a hold of the ritual mat that went along with the book back when it was released, however I’ve always been skeptical about working with Qliphoth because A) I feared them.- and B) I wasn’t sure I were ready because of lack of spiritual development, I am not a pro however I am not necessarily lacking so much in clairvoyance and astral travel anymore. These sessions are just guided meditations so no soul travel going on. Necessarily unless you so choose to travel to them.

2019 – 05-31

Visions: it’s very disturbing actually. After entering the moon from the water and calling out the name of Lillith. I was transformed into a black snake, with yellow spots at the back of my head and yellow underside. I wrangled away to the outside where I was warngling onto an altar that looked like traditional sarcophagus except it was shaped like an altar and a chalice had already been prepared for me. I was laying on the altar and a hooded man cloaked in black robes sacrificed to me to something, I could never hear his voice. He more or less stretched out his arms in the shape of the cross called on something chopped my head off and proceeded to offer my blood into the chalice, which he drank. And I entered his body and then I was back in the cave I started, where I was born out of Lillith as she was humped by some shadowy demonic being, that looked like a mix between between smoke and shadow condensed into a form, with pearl white lidless eyes. Bull like horns that where very thick, huge leathey bata-like wings, with talons like a reptile, and a tail like a classic devil.

I was about to exit the cave and I was back where I started as in I was back at the same glade, with the same altar and once that happened I was transformed into the demon I just described and I was united in sexual union with Lillith. It was really weird seeing this. And I somehow while in that moment I was somewhere else entirely like I was transformed into something looks like a Yan’ti (snake man) exiting a large cave opening indentical to the one I had just stood in. Then I was near a new clearing, making out a glade with solid rowan trees. And the silvery moon was shining down on me on the surface of a huge lake. The light illuminated me and I was memerized by it somehow and I basked in it, internally I saw it inside my minds eye yet I felt incredibly peaceful just like I would if I watched the real deal. Then the scenery came crashing down like it was just some sort of simulation, like a brickwall hit by a wrecking ball. Then I was inside darkness, me and my own shadow was the only thing that was visible, don’t ask how I could ser my own shadow in the pitch blackenss thatbsurroubded me. My shadow was pure white and I was the dark one. Suddenly the godess was standing before me. White eyes, blue skin, fiery red hair, and a deadly blood stained grin on her face. She looked very alluring, savage and terrifying all at the same time.

She kept looking at me until she faded away in the background just standing there and it was like she was pulled away from me until i couldn’t see her anymore.

2019 – 05 -31

Visions: This time it started out in a very similar way but the visions I recieved in this meditative state where very different from last time. I only remember fractions like where it started out, the cave opening led into the glade I have seen in previous visions, a moonlit small portion of a island laying next to a huge lake, where a silvery full moon hung above and cast reflections into the water. I still remember seeing that same chalice – the chalice adorned with the face of baphomet. This is where I slithered into in my ophidian form that I had once more shapeshifted into. I was laying in wait there until then I were ingested and swallowed hole. The rest is really foggy.

I remember that she; Lillith, drained me of my blood at the end of the pathworking, her skin was white as ash, and she had wine red lips and yellow eyes. Her hair was black as a ravens feather. And she had my blood smeared all over her face and I could even see her fangs as she she seemed to roar it me as if she was furious with me. She then said something that stuck with me ever since. While she was moving away from me as if I was pulled away from her by a string she told me this: ”you must learn to relax and then release.”

For future working I should attempt to do the pathworkings closer to each other preferbly once a day, and see if I can extract a meaning of some kind from the visions, this will be the hard part.

2019 -06 -10

Visions: Lillith usually isn’t a very talktaive being – I base this idea on observations made in previous wokings in this relam, today however was very different in this regard. After I had entered her cave like the previous sessions, she appeared to me as a naked woman but as silvery as the moon emitting a very strong but soothing light off of her skin as well as an aura, in the darkness surrounding me she shone brightly. At this point she told me to release my fears, doubts and inhibbitions in regards to my desires, wants and wills. I should do so because if I don’t consier these viable or ignore them others will too. Meaning I should show what I want and take what I want when I want. With that as I was standing there wet and naked she bit my neck and drained me of blood. I was then transformed into a snake and I was back at the same glade in part, it was like I were at an another destination at the same island. I had tansformed into a viper. And I was poked at with a stick and then suddenly killed and decapitated in a ritual designed to extract my fangs, a ritual in Necromantic Sorccery comes to mind. And they were grinded into a powder and then put into an elexit of some kind which was drunk by a hooded man that had a chainmail like a night but tattered and torn clothing like a bandit. He had an altar with red table cloth and tons of tools that I can’t name. He was hunched over the table the chalices that were golden formed and inverted equilateral triangle pointing towards the man. The effects of the potion now kicked in and three snakes appeared along with Lillith. she released us and two of them held the man body down allowing me to rip out his adam’s apple and enter him through the hole in his neck, and I somehow (I don’t know how) aligned myself perfectly with his spine, and integrated my consciousness with his. Then once the previous had occured, he then saw a vision which I experienced as someone looking over his shoulder - of a sarcophagus, or rather an altar that looked like a sarchophagus. It was surrounded by darkness except a solitary beam of moonight shining onto the altar, illuminating a naked woman with purple hair with misty white eyes, appearing as if she was possessed by something. This part is rather graphic- the man pulled out a knife and proceeded having intercourse with her and then at the peak of sexual arousal (near orgasm) for both parties, he slit her throat first and then his, bleeding to death ontop of the altar and upon his death - me and the other two snakes were released from him and now formed a triangle outside of the cave I had exited from at the start of this meditation, our formed bodies was set on fire within the inner perimeter of the triangle and through the orange flames the goddess rose. Her appearene had slightly changed, her skin was white like ash , white eyes like pearls and pruple hair not red which I have seen her in a few times. She gripped me around my neck in my current snake like form and said many things as she was lifting me up to her face, the only thing I remember that really stood out was:

“Before you can rule the passions and desires of others, you must first release your inhibitions to power, before you can steal or take the power of others you must for release your own. Let go of your inhibitions and let your desires ride you, but do not become a slave to them.”

With this she guided me to otherparts of the relam a dense thick forest, with trees that looked like they belonged somehwere in ancient greece:

except there was a ton of them and they were very closely put together. Very little light was shining from the full moon however the rays that did illuminate they are was very strong like a silver sun. In this place there where male demons with large bent phalluses and an owl watched me, she told me in time I would guard her relam just like them but for nowI should leave. So I did and here I am writing about this expereince. This stuff is strange, confusing and rewarding, there are many other things I’d like to mention but there isn’t enough time now, I’ll attempt to get back tomorrow and also attempt to extracta meaning from this pathworking somehow…

I have yet to sit down and decode the symbology contained within all of this will have to do it some day

UPDATE - forgot to include this

2019 – 06 – 12

Visions: After entering the cave and called out her name. Lillith appeared as a naked woman made out of by silvery moonlight. She then grabbed my hand and flew me way above the ground and we danced or rather spun in circles she smiled and then let me go. And towards the verdant forest I fell, quickly and mercilessly I hit the ground although this wasn’t painful in any way, it still took some time to get up. Once I got up I saw a fountain made out of white marble, I think, instead of water it contained blood. I drank from it and I could see my features change into that of what I can only percieve to be those of a monstrous vampire. I had blood around my mouth and white eyes, and my skin was that os blood drained corpse. Once this transformation had occured Lillith appeared behind me and grabbed me by my collar and then pulled me down to the ground so I was kneeling and then she broke my neck and as I laid in a pool of my own blood. I was then sucked as if yanked by a hook of some kind and was transported to the moon and to the darkside of it, I noticed a black building with large talons or rather tusks erupting out of the earth, the gate had some golden ornaments and I was apparently in a desert at either sunrise or sunset because the sky pure red like blood. Suddenly I was sucked through the gate front gate, it was closed by the way, into the temple where the goddess beautiful yet monstrous was sitting on her throne butt naked and pale as the winter snow, with eyes black as coal and wavy but well kept purple hair. She had servants, all of them were women dressed in golden ornamated shawls with hoods, even their bodies where semi transperent you couldn’t make out a lot of these womens features, they poured her what I intuitiely registered and just knew was my own blood. Which she drank. Her fangs were visible as she grinned at me at first and then she became very serious and cold and she said:

”I am not going to teach you anything more unless you apply what I already taught you. Come back once you have completed everything else.”

Just like that as quickly as I got in I were teleported outside. And I was under the sky orange scorching sun and the temple was gone. Something was seriously messed up with time as the clouds moved accross the sky infront of me as someone had pressed fast forward and a TV – remote and then suddely the couds move backwards, towards me but as if someone had pressed fast backwards instead. I then saw another fountain except water didn’t spurt out from this one. I walked up to it and then drank from it. The rippling effect revealed my living room where I sat and I was sucked into the room from above and landed into myself. I both saw this while at the same time experienced this like: I fell from above and into myself - internally I felt as if something really heavy landed over my shoulders, like someone had a dropped a heavy blanket with weights and my awareness was immediately turned to back behind my eyelids. I opened my eyes feeling very much out of place, along with a feeling slightly disoriented I also had the ”luxury” of experiencing a really annoying and persistent high pitched ringing in my ears, along with intense electric sensations spreading out from the middle of my forehead /vibrating specifically the my ajna (third eye (brow chakra)) - and Sahasrarah (crown) chakras.

Date: Unknown

Vision: this time after sitting on my bed on the ritual mat and connecting with Gamaliel and floating towards the moon and into the cave. What followed next was a bit much. After seeing the goddess as a woman with red hair appearing in a red dress, she was beautiful though, she wasn’t as fair as whe usually had appeared before she was more tanned and her eyes were still golden yellow and her pupils was a bit dilated. The dress didn’t cover he arms and was sort of dragging behind her. She walked with me a bit and then just pointed to the exit.

I don’t remember much for some reason, I only remember that the minute I walked out my body twisted and started to transform into some kind of reptilian humanoid with horns that was a mix between draconian and devil like more than anything else. I was just walking knowing that I should walk towards something, and eventually I reached a stone altar in the woods were two male demons were sodomizing a human a male. My view suddenly changed and I was then one of demons who did that. The human me…that was pretty disturbing to me. Then I heard the voice goddess echoing to me saying:

“Your friends and family will use your desires and you and rape you like this for as long allow them. If you stay in this delusion you won’t ever do what’s in your best interest. Unless you enjoy staying this way?”

To which I replied I didn’t. I was then transported to the temple I described earlier in an instant. She was sitting on her throne was a black transparent dess that hung like a robe, the fabric appared to made out of something like a spider’s webb. It was transluscent but had motiffs of leafs, and branches covering it. It also had sleves. her legs were crossed and she held a ornated chalice in her right hand. Her skin was pale again and she was gazing intently at me. Her expression was hard to descipher. The godess was surrounded by the astral hand maidens I’ve deatiled before. Attending to her needs. she followed up by saying:

“Then from this day you should work on releasing yourself from yourself. You belong to the fold now and I will guide your step but you have to trust me and above all lose yourself in this, and let nothing stop you. You deserve to revel in your pleasure not bound by shame. Now you may leave.”

Then in that room a font appeared, a font as in the place you baptize babies in. It was filled with astral waters. I then peered through the waters and I was looking at myself from behind. I then without warning was sucked into my body and I was about as disoriented as the least time. And the bloody ringing made itself known this time as well.

Asenath Mason wasn’t kidding in a way working with the Qliphoth is pretty disturbing and you never know what you are in for, sorry for the graphic nature of the updated post. But I figure let this be an example of what you can come across whe undertaking these workings.

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Do you use your Blood in every meditation?

I don’t use blood in my meditations. I use blood in ritual and even then not all the time it’s usually done to make a permanent effect or some type of binding. With the exception of invoking or evoking the Qliphoth I would use bloodletting. Human blood should be used with care as it is one of the most powerful offerings you can give.

To answer your question: I see visions related to blood whenever I sit down and contact the energies of Gamaliel. I am thankful for reminding me of this journal I have a few updates to make regarding this part of the Qliphothic workings as a some new things have happened since then.

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Lucid Dreams & Dreams

Dream 2019-02-19

Dream: I do rmember something with me entering a building and a face of a woman with red hair but that’s all I am able to recall.

Date: about a month ago

It was around 10:00 (European time, as I know Americans and Englishmen don’t like when Europeans slaughter the use of am and pm respectively) where I live. What was weird was this dream had this neon blue hue, which I have come to associate with astral or Lucid experiences. This was pretty short. In this dream there was this male figure with really facial features, he had big eyes almost doll like, that was really dark brown almost black. His face was very serious he indeed was naked squatting behind me as I was layin at my side, but something just felt very off about him despite human in the dream he diden’t feel human at all.

Then he did something disturbing he was insertin or rather probing me (you can guess and how where) with what would be literally translated as a steel whire. I squirmed in the dream and the more I squirmed the more intense the probing bacame and I woke up quickly. I tried to control the dream and change the appearence of the but it just simply wouldn’t chnge form or character.

My partner and was about to leave for the day, and he looked a bit concerned before while saying goodbye. I hadn’t even noticed he had got up. And I usually never fail to do so.

I think this might be because I hadn’t worked with my spritual lover for about a week. And I think that this was his way of reminding me of his prescence.

Weird…if that’s the case.

I also had a dream regarding Hecate but tthat’s related to something else so I won’t detail it here.

BUMP

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Gamaliel workings

Date: about 3 weeks ago

Background: a few days after the above meditation session. I poured through some of my occult library to figure how to work with Lillith as intensely as possible. And well as I worked with another female Qliphothic being, Hecate I figured I could use her help to aid my workings with Gamaliel. You see other than this current I work with a few other currents almost al l of them are related except one. One current that is related to the Qliphoth are the Hecatean current. In Alan Smith’s Book: the Queen of hell there’s a ritual about consecrating a few ritual tools by using sex magick. And I thought I would use Alan Smith’s book along with rituals of pleasure to excel in the sphere of Gamaliel.

I’ll begin explaining a ritual that I’ve used for a while that’s from: Rituals a Pleasure I won’t be too detailed but detailed enough. In he book Queen of Hell by Mark Alan Smith there’s a recommended way of consecrating your athame by using your sexual fluids, spunk in my case. I what’s werid I didn’t have a problem using my blood but spunk felt a little weird because of the intimacy. I also felt a stong pull towards a book that’s been gathering dust on my book shelf which where: Rituals of Pleasure and I started to apply two things from that book one working with a spirit lover (the easiest way) you imagine a spirit lover and imagine having sex with them and then project at the point of orgasm that energy into their form either laying beside you or hovering above you. Which I did usually when waking when I was alone for a few times my spiritual lover was is a male one. I usually took a shower and tried to dess all nice before laying down on the bed and imagining all sorts of stuff, the exact nature I guess would be related to switching if you know what I mean.

Experience: And a good numbers of workings continued like that and I was suprised at the intensity of the orgasm that followed after stimulating myself this way. After doing several working like this I though I can use this to my advantadge in consecrating the Athame too. So after invoking Hecate and then Evoking her after setting up the altar with two green candles with her sigil’s carved in them, as well spreading out pink rose petals in a circle all over the floor. I started pleasing mysef and started to imagining the godess appearing and slowly escalating into intercourse, she eventually rode me while my spiritual lover stimulated me in other ways, it was more visual than anything else. I had stop several times and projecting the energy that had accumulated this way just before orgasm, while holding my breath into my forehead (third eye). What happened was it was pretty dark as I held my breath, then a indigo pulse that extended into a sphere above in a quick pulse occured and then dissappeared and for a brief moment I could see the room crystal clear. This happened each and every time I was nearing climax but stopped and projected into my third eye, after repeating for a few times the climax was insane. It’s hard to describe, it was as if your body was charged with electricity and someone was massaging your brain I could really intensity all over. From that moment the godess pretty pleased I consecrated the athame using the fluids I had just produced. I was recommended doing this once in a while by the godess herself. Since then I’ve also conntinued working with my spiritual lover in that simple way for now, it will progress soon enough. The trick of postponing orgasm and projecting the built up energy was something I learned from Asenath Mason’s book Qliphothic Meditations as well as rites of Lucifer, which is a working you do relating to connecting with Shemyaza

I’ve had moments where I felt guilty for doing this which made me hesitant to write about this at all, the obvious reason is shame appearing as if I want attention, secondly and probably more importantly because as I am in a comitted physical relaationship, while undertaking these workings. To note: there’s nothing wrong with the intimacy with my current partner. It’s just that sex magick is more or less required to pass through the sphere of Gamaliel and so I couldn’t just skip it. But it seems Lillith intend to make me break several taboos and promises I hope I will be able to keep my relationship that I have.

Using spunk or mestrual blood is a damn potent way to charge your ritual tools, esepcially your spritual weapons. I am pretty sure you can use to manifest astral weapons and make the stronger as well. I haven’t scanned the athame since I charged it but there’s a very sold feeling when using it, It is an extension of me as well as I feel my hand always feeling warm when using it, like a gentle flame. I remember when charging it (you cna guess how I did it), it light up with red and indigo in terms of aura then it simply became more flaming like a candle flame. I should probably take a picture some time.

My issues with using sex magick (might be common for others as well): I’ve noticed that with each time I work this way with my spiritual lover more and more guilt are released and I can relax more and more and the intensity of the auto stimulation is getting better with each time. However I noticed that I was close at falling into a common pitfall, as in that I loved the feeling or the orgasm so much that I just wanted to do it for the feeling and not using sex magick as a means to ascent. Meaning I was about com addicted to pleasure itself. This is very easy to fall prety to I have noticed. When something feels good you want to enjoy sometimes you just enjoy for the sake of enjoyment it’s not lust enjoyment with a purpose. I think this is what the goddess meant when she wanted me to not become a slave but enjoying and riding the ecstacy of my desires, releasing guilt make me feel more whole than I’ve felt in quite some time. Gamaliel I believe will be the hardest sphere for me as I have so many issues to deal with her hence the extensive working with it. Overcoming guilt and shame and doubt is sometimes the hardest thing to do let alone doing what’s right for you what you need for your own well being. Most of the time we have expactations on us to behave in specific manners and when the expeted way and what we might need to feel good in general doesn’t mesh, then doubt rears it’s ugly head making you question if you have done the right thing, and when reflecting about what we have done once a “sinful” action is commited, at least the first time going against the norm we usually feel guilt or missplacement of some kind. Until we pass a threshhold of us realizing that what we denied ourself is what we needed. This is why taking back your soverignty and the control of your desires is so important as it gives character, wellbeing and respect for yourself as well as from others but also takes you one step closer towards yourself.

BUMP

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Dream (s) - the bloodied hand and the floating man: 2019 - 10 - 09

These dreams are included here as they could be related to the sphere of Gamaliel. The nightmare especially, an description of each will follow below.

There are two dreams following each other. The first one was s nightmare the second one was just strange. This is not a lucid dream these were ordinary stuff but they weren’t as incoherent as most dreams tend to be.

The nightmare: was about me and my partner’s cat. Before anything else, I think I should mention that before I went to sleep that night I remembered a passage from Necromantic Sorcery by Dante Abiel. The passage I am thinking about as when delving deep enough into the Necromantic current you will begin to experience nightmares and even on a daily basis, and it’s perfectly normal as a love and hate relationship between the dead and thw Necromancer eventually unfolds as the Necromancer becomes closer with the dead. I don’t know how this is even relevant to dream that followed in anyway except for acting as the trigger to it.

In the nightmare there was me and the partner and our cat. It’s a female and she has black fur. She was a little bit downtrodden and she was curling intoto a ball as she was freezing as it was cold because of winter, somehow we couldn’t afford to keep her due starvation and we - me and my partner, had to leave to find a new place to live. My partner then had an axe which was meant to cut of her head and kill her, it didn’t. Instead the swing of the axe made a deep wound in her head I remember being sad in the dream as was my partner, we then ran after her outside of the apartment as she ran outside through the open front door. I wanted to comfort her and so did he. We eventually found her brought her inside and attempted to calm her down, feed and heal her. As we sat by a warm fire in a cabin somewhere…the dream ended there as I woke up.

The dream: a previous community college I went to back in the day, were payed a visit by a grandmaster in a martial art. The students of that martial art, me included, were inside a gym hall. Every japanese art contains the element of what I’ve learned as rei-ho, I guess you call it dojo etiquette, bowing among other things. Despite knowing everything about it, how and when everything was done, I were slow always falling behind the other students by three steps, especially when we did katas. Then we were supposed to run and jump over…I guess ypu call these terminals?

image

What’s weird was when I ran and jumper over these, I floated, almost flew, as my reach and speed was graceful and yet quick. I then after running faster than the others and I made it back to the start/finish line and woke up.

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Dream (s) 2019 - 10 - 24

What happened: in this dream I were paying my family (parents) at a visit at their place somewhere in countryside. It was daytime and I had decided to walk in nearby field close to their place, it didn’t take long until I somehow was transported behind a cluster of trees at the backside of their house where I saw three graves unmarked graves, as in there were no gravestones with any names, there were just Stones and and some random haphazard cross made out of wood, another grave was just marked with three stones,the Thord grave was marker with a block of concrete and had some strange metal points things shooting up out of the concretez apparently had been given a shovel and I started digging in the grave with the cross. Eventually a dog started barking, but I didn’t care and I kept going eventually more barking sounds could be heard, and I looked up three elderly men with shotguns and three black dogs, german shephards to be exact. I ran and jumped over the nearby fence that surrounded the hidden grave site. For some reason the three men states behind the fence one them was closer to the fence than the other two. He had pretty short white hair, white eyebrows, and a trimmers whole white beard, along with white eyes meaning no iris or pupil. And a dog was close to him and despite him being more than 20 meters away I could hear him say:

”It’s over. You will not get away this time. We have about 10 different ways to showcase your face to your enemies, surrender now.”

I just started at him for a moment before walking up. This dream felt very important and not only that there are some interesting things here, numerology and threats and signs of parallells to death and decay. I think this is an omen and not necessarily a good one. I’ll revisit it soon enough with an interpretation thw most noteable thing is that I remember pretty much everything and all details in the dream, which haven’t happened in the past.

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The dream above that happened five days ago (2019 -10 -24) - I guess it should be titled: The Grave and the chase.

The dream is odd on one end it can be seen as brain junk yet a few things stands out, as I’ve never recieved a threat in a dream before or numerology to this extent. At any rate let’s begin with the numerology aspects of the dream: so in it we have the numbers: three graves, three stones ontop of one of the graves. Three elderly men and three dogs. The number three according to several numerology sources found on the internet pretty much says: great energy and extroversion but no direction or rather channel for the energetic output. The number also seemingly brings luck, and optimism but being stuck with the ego and not learning from misstakes. To counter it discipline and hard work is needed to channel the abundance of creative energy for personal growth. The number three can be seen in mythology: the three norns, the three fates, the divine and unholy trinity: father, son, and the holy spirit and Satan antichrist and the false prophet or the famous occult trinity of favorite words: body, mind, spirit/soul - associations with Jupiter is apparently also linked to the number in question, jupiter apparently stands for: abundance, knowledge and wisdom which rules over sagitarius which if I remember correctly is a fire sign. My own sign is an earth sign so in a way it can’t relate at least directly, more on that later.

Then except when adding the numbers of three things together we form the number 9, which doesn’t need to mean anything. But the number 10 is directly referenced, which likely is worth paying attention to:

According to the info I found regarding the number 10 it apparently is somewhat of a sacred number in some places, Japan is one of them. At any rate the number 10 apparently shows a person that has reached maturity and is very independent and has an enormous potential and, the number helps bringing projects into fruition. Number 10 apparently has a meaing as in a return to unity between being and nonb´-being. The All and No-thing and so on. But interpeted in the context it doesn’t seem like there’s anything positive at all to he number really.

Then we have the graves themselves we bury people to return them to the earth or rather preserve them with their things in some ancient cultures, to preserve them as much as possible to aid them in their journey into the afterlife if you so will. At least in ancient Egypt I am sure that they buried Kings and Queens with various items, weapons and food and even pets included. As far as the vikings go they burned Kings and Queens and roalty and buried the others. So to me the symbology of graves are symbols of preservation of something that’s usually important.

Then we have the sacrilige of me attempting to gid up up a grave, perhaps in the serach of finding “hidden” treasure or to find something of value that’s been preserved there, perhaps bones, bones can be interpreted to have a value on their own depending on what kind of bone and intent is behind the use of it. Then we have the moment of three dogs, dogs or rather jackals; these hounds were no jackals that’s for sure, in ancient egypts were linked to Anubis (it’s a greek word), the famous egyptian God of the Dead that’s very famously depicted like a man with the head and an staff with an the symbol of the ankh ontop of it. A dog at from an every day person perspective without the symbology included to me deals with loyalty, friendship hapiness but dogs are also guardians, viscious (depending in the breed) messengers as dogs tend to inform when there’s an intruder inside a home living or dead. Then we have the three men all of them being elderly not wrinkly but not extremly old or young either. Than we have being chased by them likely refers to loss of control as a common idea of being chased as refered to in an article on psyhcology today basically says: being chased means you have problems that are so overwhelming that you can’t deal with them and so you push them to the side and run away from them.

And finally we have the threat part that’s related to the number 10, which in of itself is strange as the number 10 at least in the info I found has a few negatve things attached to it which are: leadership skills but lack of focus or will to lead and also these: lack of consideration and tolerance for other peoples thoughs. Numbness to company and doesn’t mind being alone and doesn’t give a shit about anyone or anything unless convinved that it’s necessary. The way the old man said it seems like an omen esepcially since I woke up with a strange scratch on my left hand below my thumb knuckle that’s very similar to a lightning bolt or well I guess the sowilo rune: the S - rune, I can’t remember that I had fallen or scratched myself in that particular way, if the cat had clawed it’s a pretty nicely done scratch done by a cat paw. Here’s what I mean:

Another strange thing that happened was when I played the card game Munchkin (I know it deosn’t mean anything) but four times in a row I pulled the curse cards,which hampered my progress severly this was before the dream by the way. Not that it means that I am cursed necessarily it’s just a really odd conincidence pulling four of them in a row. Of course this can be explained away with a poorly stacked deck.

The only thing I find odd is the part with the old man in the dream perhaps I should do a cleansing as well as a curse breaking ritual just to be sure, it would be the first time somone has attempted to curse me if that’s indeed the case…cool if so, that means that I am starting to make some progress I guess. To note: I don’t think that it necessarily that’s the case the thing is: if I am cursed and the streak of bad luck is one of other causes a simple curse brekaing rite should make it stop, it not then it means two things one I need a stronger rite or B - it could be all in my head pereceivng the world through a negative lense can also convince yourself that you’re being targeted. All the signs of the dream indicate output of energy with no direction and work with myself perhaps resolving some issues with discipline and focus and such will cure the problem I’ll return with an update regardless.

All the best.

Dream (s) - 2019-11-02T09:00:00Z

Escape and retalitation

What happened: I remember that me and my best buds were in our hometown and just taking a stroll near the townsquare. Then all of a sudden transported near a parking lot and we ran away from what appeared to be a gang of some kind. Basically my friend told me to just run and shoved me in order to push to start. Then all of sudden stopped wanting to face the people whi chased us. My friends ran and I stayed behind I was now standing face to face with a mexican man, was a black trimmed beard, that basically looks like this: *

bild

Not the guy just the beard. it was just a bit more thiner around the chin, the eyes were I guess I’d call them chestnut brown, he also had a black cap, and leather jacket and blue jeans. The guy’s neck was partially covered by tatoos, like flames and such. But I distincly remember one symbol, meaning: I remember that two arrows crossed over like a: x - over a rune like symbol specifically ingwaz, the lower part of the arrows had four lines on each arrow, the feathery part that is, so sort of like this:

I-
I-
I-
I-

Just imagine that he lines in the middle are fused together as one and the distance inbetween the verical lines are shorter.

He basically called me an idiot and wondered why i didn’t stay with my friends. I don’t remember my reply exactly but I think I asked why they were chasing us. It was about to escalate into fist fight but just before it all broke loose I woke up.

First time I had a dream about stuff like this, and also it seems my overall dream recall is getting better as the intervals are seemingly getting shorter, weird I think someone might be telling me something, weird, I think we’ll have to wait and see for this one.

I’ll return with a interpretation some other day today I am not very feeling very well after pretty intense round at a local pub.

Enjoy your day/evening/night

1 Like

2019-11-10T23:00:00Z

Gamaliel workings - Side steeping the Path - Meeting with Lucifer

I am not sure I should place this here this is sort of the right place but not at the same times. Lucifer rules the sphere of Thaumiel (The Twin God) not the sphere of Gamaliel however he is present here in a different form though I am not sure but I think Lilu is a mask of his, but I’ll need to do reaserach in order to be sure. I’ve mentioned before that I walk a few different currents at once like for example: The Draconian Path: as the draconian ritual book is really useful to have if you are going to undertake the Qliphothic workings like: Invocations and Evocations and the meditation books by Asenath Mason. Including the Path of Trident, as well as the nose current, the path of smoke I am currently takin a break from as it would be too much things going on and it would casue a burn out. Why I am telling you this is not impress but simply show that my workings blend and cause an overlap between various systems and approaches to the same thing but working with the teachings of Naamah and Hecate I was instructed by Hecate after about nine days of evocation as well as the final one on Samahain (31st of October) after relaying some instructions to me, she suggested I contact and start work with Lucifer. I have several books dealing with Lucifer but in the Queen of Hell by Mark Alan Smith - there’s the underlining of building a relationship and it’s recommended to evoke Lucifer in a manifestation triangle (the triangle of art (sometimes spelt arte)) after calling Hecate first, this is done at least initially until a relatioonship is built with Lucifer through Hecate, after that you won’t necessairly need to Evoke Lucifer of the other gods of the trident into the triangle. Then you can let him in the circle and finally dispose of the circle all together.

I used Smith’s approach in so much that - I did the prayers, the roses, the incense: Franincense and and Sandalwood and I included Opium incense, I’ll explain why later. I cast the circle but I skipped evoking Lucifer into the triangle, the circle was cast by calling on the four elements beginning in the west: the element of water and then spun counter clockwise with the athame being used as a channel, you could just use fingers for this point with your index and forefinger and close your thumb around the others. NOTE: the athame and the incense is just there for the sake of immersion according to me. After creating the astral circle using the athame to draw an astral representation of which while pointing the athame to the specific cardinal point when calling for the element that’s associated with it, after which I went on binding the elemental energies to what is known is this current as - the sphere of darkness (an obsidian orb) which I had placed in the middle of the circle, to act as the fifth element (that of spirit (or as Smith descibes it: the axiom of the circle)). I then turned the page to the specific incantation used by Mark Alan Smith to call on Lucifer. I always like to try an authors approach first before going to by my own way and well it worked pretty well but not in as a profound way as I sort of was expecting.

A couple of things happened during and after the incantation was finished. While giving the incantation the indigo candle on the altar first started waving, then it just stood perfectly still, the incense sticks started to burn quicker it seems as a very noticeable stream of smoke came out in waves from the incense stick, although that could be explaind by angle of the incense stick/sticks. I had finally recived the quartz crystal which I had a few days before drawn Lucifer’s sigil on, calling Lucifer using mountain crystal (a.k.a quartz) will according to Smith bring his essence closer to you and even permate your aura and your subtle energy bodies, I’ve always been a bit skeptic about using crystals as it’s really odd for inanimate inorganic objects to have energy at leats in the past that was my thought process, now I am not so sure…I pointed the athame the the crystal while kneeling before it with the book in my hand the energy that manifested was strange and it was a slow burn.

A few seconds after the incantation I heard almost like a whisper in my mind to turn around, it said it twice - I turned around I felt the need to hold the crystal in my hand left hand. Which I did. In the south of my temple I have an altar as well as in the North designated for different entities and different currents. I was now facing south and I could see my altar there and it’s idols, but something was a bit different about them, the idols, especially the one I had created for Amaymon. It called on my attention and the whole altar and the objects upon lite up with a electric blue field that were just about a centimeter or so around each objects but it was clearly visible with my eyes open. I don’t know if it was the crystal that made it happen if I for some reason were put in to trance due to everything else that had been going on beforte that moment but I can’t deny what I saw though.

The imagery of a black demon almost a triangular shaped head, with horns that splayed upwards were pretty clear, his eyes shifted colors, at first they from golden yellow with no iris, then in due time they became red and golden with a reptilian slit in them. Note this was not seen astrally as much it was a flash like experience that gradually came more and more into focus. Meaning the image of Lucifer’s appearence gradually came into view as the electric energy around me increased more and more, until I felt it was hard to breath and my hands and feet felt like I had a colony of ants crawling on them, along with increased activity in my crown and ajna chakras, it felt like I had a sphere inside my third eye and crown chakra that grew in size. Along with the above as the presence solidified around me, I felt I was some sort of electric field, I couldn’t see it, but I could feel there something spinning around me. I got the impression at least when thinking back on this Evocation that when calling Lucifer through his symbol that I had drawn on the quartz crystal, that it allowed his energy to resonate and permate my own energetic field and solidify more solidly on the this plane, as might’ve helped ground his energy into the temple more solidly. This is likely what I was feeling when experiencing the spinning senation described earlier, his aura permeating mine and I guess changing it and aligning it with his vibrations in order for me be able to make contact.

Lucifer said a lot of things about growth and power but a few things stood, and those are the things that I want to relay to you: regarding incense other than frankicense, opium works really well he apparently likes it a lot, it helps opening up your inner vision apparently and make you more receptive. I think this has more to do with smell and immersion more than anything else. Another thing he instructed me was pouring over a powder into a bowl, the powder in question had already been made but I had not idea what to use it, it had just been sitting on the altar in the south for quite sometime, now I was instructed to pour over the powder into a new bowl and place his crystal ontop of the powder.

The powder consists of these ingredients:

Charcoal (crushed/grinded into a powder)
Sunflower seed oil
Snake vertebrae (same as charcoal)
Blood (a few drops from your right hand)
Water (natural or tap water(natural is recommended though if available).
Ash (incense ash (frankincense or sandalwood or opium) or just plain ash)

Once obtained, you then consecrate each ingredient as you first will feel out it’s specific energy (holing your left hand above it close your eyes and allow whatever impressions and feelings to enter your mind about the qualities of each ingredient and write it down), once felt out set it aside and repeat the process with each ingredient, once the former is done combine them all and feel out the mixture. Then you consecrate by saying:

This mixture (or perhaps conction) belongs to the god/goddess within. Your task is (the purpose of the mixture) you’ll come when you are called and you’ll fulfill your purpose. So it is Eternal (or so it is done (use whatever floats your boat that tells you the workings is now complete)).

Or something like it.

After speaking to me about what it means make sacrifices and also how to work with him in this new form, some of the stuff he said related to how I use incenses, when and for what purpose. Lucifer also relayed this about me giving blood offerings, as apparently it’s best you are going to give your blood that it comes from your right hand.The reason I think is because your right hand is the axis of the sun, so your right side of your body equals fire, light, life and also creative energy (however solar energy can be harmful just saying), agressive energy this is my interpretation of what he said though. His exacts words where like this:

“Giving your blood should always be offered through your right hand.”

He then asked for two more things: (1). That I offer one drop of my blood on the tip of the crystal and in the middle of the sigil this was after breathing on it three times, while imagining a portion of my prana leaving me and entering the crystal. Internally this was shown as the aura of the crystal becoming more radiant and growing and also becoming more dense. Once the above procedure was finished, I was instructed to let the tip of crystal touch my forehead at the location of the ajna I would interpret this as it’s energetic field entering my ajna chakra directly. At first not much happened then my head and body I constricted really tightly, I couldn’t move a muscle and an deep purple flash was seen behing my closed eyelids and as the constriction of my body subsided Lucifer’s appearence and eyes had become pretty clear as an astral outline had begun taking form and he said:

“Can you see me now as I can see you? You’ve come far from where you once began but you still have very much to learn. Call on me often and I’ll show the ways of the craft and I’ll open your eyes to the deeper recesses of the abyss, for there are many paths that lead to me, you’ve heard the call, and now that you’ve found and now that you’ve called me you now must walk with me.”

He then instructed me that I should create a wand for thr future but this is not necessary at this momnent, it should be one created from a branch of an oak. He then ordered me to do call of trident, which is found on second page of the book The Red King by the same author.

“The altar you’ve made for others [I think he refered to the gatekeepers at least that’s what I’m able to infer from this] also included me in some ways and in some ways not. It is a fine altar but I want you to leave me an offering on the altar for me in south as well as one for Hecate and me on the other one in the North. Call on me often [internally I felt my attention was drawn to the east] and I shall show you the way. Also for future workings never evoke an entity you’ve do no know anything about without a triangle of manifestation, once a relationship has been established between you and them you can remove the triangle and then the circle. As we’ve already met earlier in many ways and forms I’ve been lenient this time but I won’t be in the future so keep that in mind for all future workings. I have for you though, from now on every day for a time I want to breathe your essence into the crystal and also offer it your blood. This working will solidy my essence and entwine it with your and in due time you’ll be ready for the next step. This is all and now I’ll take my leave.”

And with that his energy disappeared not quickly but not slowly either.

I’d like to add I next to never use a triangle of manifestation as I consider it almost like a constriction or dog pen for the entity that’s being summoned. They are not our slaves they work with us because they want to and we ask for their help both benefit, the get to affect out word and walk among us and we get to take part of their power for our ascent. I didn’t want to constrict Lucifer necessairly as I believed I already knew him pretty well, well I guess but not as well as I thought I do. I’ll reutn my Gamaliel Workings but under Lucifer’s guidance and watchful overlooking me this time.

One flaw I must say regarding the primal craft books is that regarding how the each sphere and such it’s nowwhere near as streamlined as easy to wrap your head around as it is using Asenath Mason’s methods. I think I am going to combine the two for optimum effect. As the tomes seem to be very much interlinked. Also the system feels very formal in Wiccan like in some ways like it feels like it’s almost a bit religious in it’s working methods but that doesn’t mean it lacks potential quite the opposite.

I’ll update soon enough with this thread until then enjoy your ascent.

Dark blessings

2019-11-11T23:00:00Z

A NEW WAY OF OLD - consecrating a triangle for a specific current or entities

I recently completed a Gamaliel working but I have a unpdate to make first in this journal first in regards to a related topic. You see we all learn at some point that the use of a traingle of manifestation is important you are supposed to draw it, it’s an equailteral traingle, some people like to add a few things like a circle in ther triangle. This is instead of drawing it in the dirt or making a cloth version. I for one like to think that entities really don’t care about on what surface the triangle is carved or made upon as much as it is done in the first place. Meaning I drew a triangle on a piece of paper according the imagery found in Alan Smith’s book, but I added a layer to it meaning I added Hecate’s, Belial and Lucifer’s name on the wooden frame surrounding a picture frame that’s pretty large. It’s not consecrated yet but it’s almost done I just need to do something with the background I think I should paint or black or purple we’ll anyways here it is:

On the top it says; Hecate, to the right it reads Lucifer, on the left it says Belial. The alphabeth being used is from Enoch B. Petrucelly’s book: The Black Witch - A Grimoire of the Demonic Tounge. The alphabet works both as letters and words at the same time that channel a specifric intention it’s really cool and has much potential, once the mirror properly cinsecrated I’ll uppdate the thread in it’s ready state.

Also I was just barely able finish drawing the triangle itself this was due to my field of vision constantly being interrupted by flashes of blue indigo blue coming from the lines as I drew them. It’s not perfect by any means, however I don’t feel any need to mess with it any further. Let me know what you pick up, I feel an intense electric energy coming from it, just gazing at it a few seconds put me into I guess I would call a light hypnotic trance, that quickly migrates into the TGS. It also has a very fiery feel it, I know representative of the solar energies to help with manifestation that’s why I added it, the fiery feeling is not overwhelmingly hot but it’s more dense and lukewarm I’d say but overall it has a very radiant field about it. This is without looking at it’s aura really. Let me know what you pick up both in this state as well when it’s done for comparison.

I’ve been having this idea pop into my mind for quite sometime, about drawing the triangle specifically but I didn’t think it would work. But drawing something binds an idea or thing and made into something conrete for the senses, as long as the overall outline is the same, meaning the it’s an equilateral triangle, the manifestation process shouldn’t be impacted or hampered in any way. I pushed the thought of doing this for quite some time and never really acted upon it until now. I plan to do something similar with the seed of darkness burned into wood. I think that this will be a powerful way to manifest each ruler of the trident if needed and also to help soldify their energy in a more concrete way. I’ll let you know if the traingle works as intended it likely should.

I’ll update soon, good luck in your ascent if you need it.

All the best

Here’s the quartz crystal I was talking about before in the recent post of my evocation of Lucifer:

Let me know what you pick up. I pick up an electric surge whenever my hand is grasping it. Also the internal imagery if the aura shifts between red and electric blue. In my experience that’s a very common manifestation of Lucifers aura, although sometimes it can be golden, it overall Lucifer but it slightly darker energetic field than the one I’ve experienced in the past. I’ll let you know how the workings with this crystal is proceeding soon enough.

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Dream (s): 2019 -12- 11

I’ve had several dreams of late non if them are Lucid but at least two of them seem to be relate to this pathworking.I should mention that as of late I’ve worked a lot with astral vampyrism as of late as well as my astral travel skills. The astral vampyrism is something that I’ve had extensive trouble with because I feel it nowhere near as intensely as when I first began all I feel these days when draining someone is like I absorb a massive chunk of something consisting of huge pressure. I visualize this when I drain someone as blue energy leaving their aura and feeds into my third eye and move through my chakra system into my solar plexus where it’s stored perhaps I should move the storage point into my dan tian instead that something to think about at any rate. Unlike when I began astrally project these days it’s gotten way more visceral meaning I have a really clear view and I can report back pretty solid notes of my travels somehwere. Before I just struggled moving out of my body now I can just focus on something and in one breath go there even when walking. It’s pretty fascinating, although when walking it’s like I see the place I visit in flashes. This is relevant because I think intense work as of late has helpe dme become mor receptive for recevig dreams also remembering them somehow.

But the first step towards actively become a proficient Lucid Dreamer is dream recall and I have had Lucid dreams although only a handfull, hence this thread as I will try detail my dreams but also see if I can in due time develop this skill as it has continued to elude me like a chameleon in a forest.

At any rate here are the dreams I remember there are at least four three of which I distinctly remember the most important thing but no details and the fourth I only remember one specific thing. There were 2 nightmares and two dreams so here they are:

So here they are:

About 4 weeks ago~

The Nightmare #1 : Molting

This dream is the most unclear as I remember my skin started dying and fall off in white flakes, it started with my feet and then moved on to the rest of my body, I only remember the general sense of molting when I woke up but that’s it.

About 2 weeks ago~

The Nighmare #2: Eaten Alive

In this dream I remember having a nightmare. It was me and my partner we were in the wilderness being chased by some sort of primal man. He was going on all four foot like a beast and had red eyes and his dark hair was knotted in a bunn. He had skin covered in mud at least it had mudlike color, brownish black. Me and my boyfriend where chased to a hut and hit underneath a green sheet that covered dead bodies. I remember a voice saying:

Psst! - in a whisper.

I remember seeing a woman of african descent her skin was dark brown and had pretty long really curly black hair, and dark brown eyes. Her face was egg shaped and had very strong cheekbones. She looked at me through a sqaure shaped window that hid everything but her face and portions of her neck, my boyfriend was still hiding underneath the green cover (blanket or whatever the term is) she looked at me in fear but yet somehow she looked very firm and she said:

“Better you than us, we have more too loose.”

I covered as I heard the beast man coming closer, and he/it was looking at the window and then realized I were there and he then jumped at me and started attacking me he was just about to eat my face when I woke uo.

Dream #1: Manifesting reality

About a wek back ~

About three nights ago I remember some odd things, I had just gone to bed and felt really tired but I couldn’t fall asleep for some reason but after layign still and being lulled into a sleep like state this happened:

The skull of Amaymon (I have created an idol for him it’s in my Amaymon journal) projected two circles on at the place of the skulls would be third eye and one at least 9 ft into a red clouded back ground, the projected circle was the same as the one on that was located at the idol’s thir eye only beamed forward. It was a really odd double circle, burning birhgtly white and had some smaller circle at the diagonal points, there were four of them, all of them were covered in strange glyphs I have never seen before. The idol was floating but itself and other than the projected circle it had flaming ruby red eyes that emitted a dull ruby red glow. I still remember the message the idol stated:

When you release power you focus too much on the point of focus, instead of focusing on just a point of interest, focus more on what you want to accomplish and then at the point of interest an then you project your will into the ether and also by remaining open to whatever may appear you will find that you awareness of what’s behind the veil will become an everyday ocurance instead of something you relegate to the back of your mind. Become the magick you are trying to create.

So what he seem to be saying is that you know the how to but you are making it way harder than you needed. By simply focusing on the end result rather than the process of casting the spell, once the spell is cast it’s done, and also instead of viewing the spell as it should only manifest as 20 K in your bankacounr for example, don’t focus on the amount focus on what you are going to do with it. Thereby the manifestation process won’t be limited by you and that’s when magick likey will happen.

I’ll be the first to say that: I can cast magick spells and usually I am successful but sometimes spells fizzle or they have little effect at all and it’s because the above. Amaymon’s message was indeed needed at least as a reminder as I often ask spirits to help me out when casting spells to add the extra omph to the spell. What he really seemed to speak about was the overall effect on how effecticely use my own power more instead of relaying most of the time on spirit companions. Not that it isn’t effective but in order to learn and show yourself that you are more capeable than you think the sooner you’ll develop a more solid skill set that will splash over into other venues, thereby intenifying the experience with your magick that you will not underestimate it’s power.

I will admit sometimes when I exit a ritual I can’t believe I did something or it felt really odd like it was just a haze. Although it usually brings powerful results.

Also after this happened I woke up in the middle of the night seeing a really odd symbol which I’ve never seen before: it was an equilateral triangle with a circle in the middle that had a slit like a cat. That’s it. It was black and was hoovering inside a deep purple sphere surrounded by a flashing white and violet background.

Three nights ago~

Dream #2: Interdimensional conversations

The last dream I had was really odd: I don’t remember much I only remember I met an interdimensional version of myself. A black young woman about my age. I don’t remember much, she had a really huge afro though and she was really witty and funny. We were meeting at the sunset on a hill overlooking a grassland. The only thing I remember from out conversation is that she told me that:

My upcoming journey will be hard for me but sometimes journey are meant to be hard because there’s a greater reward waiting for me at the end of it.

My interpretation of all the above is that at least two, possibly three of these dreams relate to this particular pathworking especially the when eaten alive. Why? Because it’s a common theme of Gamaliel and I quote from Asnath Masons book Qliphothic Meditations: “Dreams inspired by the energies of the Qlipha are personal and related to various persons, situations, and life issues.” p. 63. - pretty accurate I will say, esepcially when analyzing the theme of the dream;

according to: https://www.auntyflo.com/dream-dictionary/being-eaten

The core element of the dream is this and these quotes are relevant:

“The primary element of this dream according to Jung is sexual. Being eaten consequently indicates that one is consumed by thier sexual drive. Becoming eaten, especially exhibits how we interact with one another, or a fragile feeling of the self.”

"To be chased or pursued show a feeling of being threatened by somebody or something in waking life. The main element of this dream is to uncover the reasons of why you were eaten. If you didn’t recognize the person or monster eating you, it’s probable that you have characterized aspects of your personality and that you are in denial or are attempting to escape something in waking life. "

“If a monster, animal or non-human was eating you, this symbolizes interior fears rather than exterior threats. These creatures usually stand for your aggressive animal or instinctual character which you’ll want to discover how to control.”

This reveals something profound and something I have pushed to the side I should probably engage shadow work a bit more it’s something I have never engaged in because I find it: A) silly; B). never found a clear cut guide to but I’ve always disregarded it perhaps I should look it up and see if it can help me control this.

And the first quote is indeed very relevant I won’t say how as it’s rather personal but in general that’s exactly how I felt at the time, because for some reason I didn’t trust my boyfriend for a time, I get these moments of paranoia and jealosy at times not a redeeming quality I know but instead of acting out I like to internalize the feelings and try to figure out why I feel them in the first place. And that’s probably the reason why I dreamt this and it’s being shown as something I need to work on. Thank you Lillith. You see being eaten alive

The dream relating to the idol - is not necessarily related to Gamaliel but I am pretty sure it is a tangent on it. The interpretation is in a way alredy there so no need to bog it down any further, but Gamaliel according to what I’ve seen and read from Masons’ material deals with manifesting dreams, desires and overall astral development and how to use your astral wings and Kundalini in your work so to speak, whereas the sphere of Lillith deals with overall receptiveness, inuition, divination and astral senses and opening and experiencing gateways. This is why I think Amaymon’s message is important because some of the thmes of Gamaliel directly deals with exactly what he descirbes mainly manifesting your desires on the tapestry of the ether, which will cause change first in your for your are the veichle of the change you trying to create and then letting unfold as Gamaliel is all about releasing energy that’s been locked up, it’s a very wild and unpredictable current. But if I can control my desires and not let them rule me at times, which they do, this is not the same as addiction but we talk about sexual desires here. I will be a much more potent spell caster and magician esepcially if my overall my beleif in my abillities are increased which stems from overall control.

The last dream is pretty intresting especially since it’s a female version of me from a neighbouring dimension (pretty trippy (I know right?)). At any rate apparently according to a few sources this is a very common thing, meeting yourself in a dream that is as it your other self likely is there to deliver a message to you which you up until now have ignored - according to: https://www.everydayknow.com/what-does-it-mean-when-you-meet-yourself-in-a-dream/

And this quote from that source seem relevant:

When you dream that you meet yourself, it may be a reminder that you have to view the situation from the outside. If you can look at your life objectively, you can find new ways of living or existing. You can look for out-of-the-box solutions and discover a better way of thinking if you can view your life as an outsider.

Training yourself to view your life from the ouside is something I haen’t done much, it’s hard to learn but I will deifnently come back with a few tools on how to do this. It will show me if I am engaged in internal and/or external bullshit which hamper my progress at any rate

The odd thing is I am meeting a female that looks very different from me except the shape of her eyes which were exactly the same. She was wearing an orange shirt and blue jeans and she had a very odd feeling about her like she could see right through me, hard to describe. We were standing on a hill enjoying sundown (a limina hour) I have never been to this place at least it was somewhere with a lot of green grass, Ireland is famous for their green hills. Anyways here’s an image that’s pretty close:

The only difference was we were standing on a hill and the land around us where just flat land all the way into the horizon and the grass was emerald green.

Definently think it was an another version of me, at least a more developed version of me, that has become more receptive than me perhaps through the workings of Gamaliel of that I can’t be sure. It is however said that females are usually more receptive to magick than men of that’s true I can’t say, however in many cults females are usually the matriarchs and decision makers of important decisions. Plus women can create life from the own body and in the Norse culture women where the bearer of traditions which they passed on to their children.

Pretty cool, don’t know why I am reminded of this but I’ll return to you with sources on the above I know I have some, at any rate these dreams when meditated upon have shown me some very important things which I need to deal with urgently and I think I know. My next stop will be Shadow work and invoke on fo the aspects of Lillith as shown in Rituals of Pleasure an update will follow after I complete some other things relating to Qliphoth like the consecration of a staff for Lucifer. That will be accounted for in this journal as well. Until the next time good luck on your journey.

All the best

References:

Mason, A. (2016). Qliphothic Meditations. USA: Become a Living God.

Links: see the above one’s.

Lucid Dreams & Dream (s). - 2019-12-11T23:00:00Z

This dream happened at least somewhere inbetween 5 -7 am in the morning I know because I looked at the clock. It’s starting to get pretty weird as dreams are occuring a lot more frequently almost daily, I just rarely remember them however this one I remember it’s really short and it’s not much. It’s a dream where I had just gotten into my apartment from the outside, it was snowing in the dream (it did today (conicidence much)). I removed my jacket and stared myself in the bathroom mirror I had a black cap on my head and I was straing at my face in the mirror and something was off. I heard my own thoughts in the dream but I never spoke a word. What was my face looked like they were at different stages of aging or something like it because half of my face had way more beard than my other side, I looked more tired and older on my left side than I did at my right side, which had less beard and looked younger at least more rested than the other side had a almost blue/purple bag underneath my left eye. I remember noticing the right side of my face first that it had less beard growth than the other one then I noticed the skin difference and so thought and I heard myself thinking: “huh…weird.”

And then I woke up. What was strange I was a dream for sure but I didn’t feel like I really felt like I was observing myself doing this, it was like some odd mirrorception, I guess the word I am looking for is half lucid. The dream might be connected to the pathworking we will see about that after I meditate upon it.

Lucid Dreams or Dream (s) - 2019-12-14T23:00:00Z

This was a regular dream (I think) and not a Lucid one. Another intresting things is that it seems as if the overall theme of my dreams have changed from symbolizing confusion, loss of identity or symbols of death, to instead as of tonight switched gears entirely to deal with sex, and also blockage. The dream that dealt with part is very graphic and I will leave it out because it’s too disturbing to share and I honestly haven’t been able to process it. But the part I intend to share is really short and is quite intresting regardless of its very short duration.

I remember speaking to a woman with black wavy hair, it was as black as ebony. Milky white skin and eyes, she was dressed very casually like a modern woman and not all like what we expect an entity to look like.

I don’t remember what was said I only remember that we spoke and then I were transported into seemingly nothing, the void if you want to call it that. The only thing that was here except me was a tome hovering over a pedestal surrounded by an transluscent indigo bubble. The book itself had the color of dark brown wolf fur sort of like this

The front of the book where covered in a strange glyph that looked like this:

A more hand drawn version looks like this, I know it isn’t exactly symmtetrical. It’s an odd symbol it looks like a trident sort of yet not. I will not say it’s Luciferian in nature.

I was just about to touch the aura when I woke up seemingly kicked out from whatever that place was back into my waking state. The symbol was glowing deep red and purple and that’s about it. I got to figure out what it means I feel it is important for sure. I’ll also share a working relating to Gamaliel but not right now. And also I’ll report on another dream later.

As for the interpretation of the above dream it’s simple yet not, the symbol is a mystery to me as of right now. The symbol is similar to a dragon fly in many ways originally when I woke up I remember it having only one of the two slightly bet lines, specifically the top one. Now the book itself seems to be grimoire or a tome of some kind containing various secrets that at this time seems to be out of reach and blocked from me for some reasonas as symbolized by the indigo sphere that is protecting it. Perhaps it protecting it from me or from anyone of that I can’t be sure but I have no doubt that it is indeed a shield (a visible force field if you so will). The fur is that of a wolf of that I am sure as for the exact symbology of that I’ll need to meditate upon it to really figure it out. As for the the pedestal I am pretty sure it’s a symbol for being something of importance, we don’t put things on a pedestal unless it’s important even divine thereby marking it as special.

I know I am supposed to make an effort to look inside but I don’t know how to gain access to it yet, I feel I should probably ask around and see if I can find out a way to figure this out.

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Meditation (pathworking) - 2019-12-16T23:00:00Z

I have three journals to fill but I’ll begin with the two that are those that I most intensely work with. As of this date I felt it was time to go back to the meditation as aspect of this pathworking I’ve spent a lot of time pracitcing my dream recall as well drain people astrally which the latter, namely siphon life energy from people in passing is pretty easy even walking by them in the street, it was a part of a test for being able to recieve the 7th flame of the O.A.A as well or rather a test I had to pass to be able to recieve the flame in question. I digress all of this draining and overall pracicing of dream recall seem to have had an effect on my atstral make up as senses. Meaning I don’t have the same how should I put it amnesia after astral workings. I remember lots of stuff very clearly an intresting effect to be sure. As in the past almost all workings were clear for the moment but quickly faded in a few hours after something had been undertaken in the terms of casting a spell or whatever, how this has improved and what exactly has caused this change in terms of me remembering more I can’t yet say, I’ll be sure to let you know when I do.

As for the actual visions gained from the meditation itself this was a quite different this time in many ways. After calling out to Lillith after floating in the silvery astral waters of Gamaliel and floating up through the hanging moon descirbed in previous meditation sessions and entering the bloody pulsating cave which had some puddles or small isolaed pacthes containing blood, the inside of cave had a very dimmed red light as seemingly the walls which appeared somewhat fleshy were bioluminescent, I whispered her name and she appeared as a woman made out of silverlight, literally silver and she had about waist length of hair, it wavy and despite bering astral winds or water it seemed like it was floating as some other force were acting on it. He rmost noteable feature this time though was the eyes, they were as black as an obsidian mirror. She appeared somewhat cold in her demenaour she didn’t say anything she just grabbed my hand and led me out of the cave opening and then she let go of my hand and I was suddenly along in a moonlit verdant area, it was a fairly large patch of grass land stretching out almost like a field and there was some random trees here and there forming some trail if you could call it that. There were a font that could be seen after I had walked for a bit made out of some sort of granite it wasn’t grey though it looked somewhat darker - it wasn’t black but it remnided me of a very dark grey color almost bordering into black. I looked into it I remember seeing blood I looked at my visage it sure looked like as I looked my features morphed into something more and more reptilian and eventually I guess I turned what could be calleda drake or something like it was not a dragon but it was close. I remember taking off as the transformation finished it waspainful to watch myself transform from a third perspectice as limbs gew and twisted in really odd ways that’s really hard to describe. I then remember flying for a bit until suddenly felt I needed to land and I remember landing in some sort of glade were I was torn to pieces by crazy people that looked like those of a crazy cult they tore my pieces and consumed me. Left on the altar somehow, this doesn’t make any sense to me either, there was somewhat looking pile of bones and I got the sense that it was me. Once the people were done the left me there and then the godess that still looked the same as before but more pale and she looked a bit more bestial sort of like this:

bild

Minus that odd helmet but the armour were tempered steel, and she had some transluscent dark blue cloth covering her arms and abdoment and legs. She poured some red fluid likely her own blood or perhaps it was mine I am not entirely sure which, into the mouth of the corpse or rather the skeleton that was left. It came to lfie and were animated into something that looked human but had red reptilian eyes but still had an a bight yellow colored area around the reptilian pupil in the middle of the eyes. I were then pulled into a throne room described in an earlier in this pathworking basically a black floored thron room, with some transluscent curtains that were and red gold forming strange captivating patterns. The goddess in the manner as before however I were coupled with my spritual lover there and we procceeded to have intercourse with the goddess seemingly enjoying the view so to speak and eventually she swapped with my spritual lover and rode me and that was the odd part I actually enjoyed it, it produced powerful physical sensations in all of my chakras and other areas as well, however the visions of that scene was seen from a side view it zoomed out as it it was if I was watching it happen through a circular mirror or window. And it zoomed out I could hear the sound of dripping water, like hen you hear that hollow echo of water inside a cave or a place with great acoustics. The scene kept zooming out until it was a small point bright point, surrounded by absolute blackness which then became radiant light blue water like that you’d see in a swimmin pool ona hot summers day except it was endlessly deep and was very much active or rather something were producing lots of waves and the point grew larger and larger until it was like a nova in the middle of this astral sea and then it collapsed and I was knocked back into my body which I had somehow during process forgot that it existed and I had a slight astral whiplash and I opened my eyes and that very annoying high pitched ringing once more made itself known to my senses.

This has a lot of metaphors but my journey within this sphere is not quite yet over, there are still many things which need to improve before moving onto the relam of Samael. I am nearing the Evoking and invoking phase of this pathworking. I want to make it abundantly clear that despite what the above visions showed me; Lillith is not a sex doll. Sure she is famous for being a very potent innitiatrix in sex magick, however she’s also really apt at vampyrism, influencing emotions or rather influence, blood magick and lunar magick in general she’s an amazing teacher of energywork. Which I’ll post about some other time. In summary she’s way more powerful than people give her credit for just putting it out there. I have evoked her before but not so many times, however the few times I have evoked her she has given me something which has taken me a lot of time to complete.

P.S - I’ll return with an interpretation of some kind tomorrow when I fill out the journal of the O.A.A as well as the journal of Belial as well.

Until the next time

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Lucid Dream & Dream (s) - 2019-12-26T23:00:00Z

Half Lucid dream - A door to the subconscious

The summary: I received a technqiue in terms of how to access your subsoncious mind by watching a character in my dream do it and I feel I should put it to good use as soon as possible, once I do I’ll post about it.

What happened in this dream was that I were on n old sailing boat traveling over stormy waters it was at night and the sky was dark. I don’t remember much only she seemingly important fragments. Fragments like I remember a person falling overboard, a bald man, this is sort of where the story becomes really weird in terms time as in two events occur at the same time but at different times, as in I saw the news about a group of reserachers was out on a sea somewhere in the atlantic and the bald guy fell over board, he was about middle aged and had light blue eyes and darkly colored eyebrows with really white symmetrical teeth and with the regular divers kit covering his body except his head, at any rate while I watched the new from behind someone else at the same time I was still at the boat in the storm watching him fall overboard after seemingly remembering something from a training session about diving (I don’t know the first thing about it) and I don’t remember what was being said about that I jumped into the waters.

What was noticeable right away and I remember this very clearly was that the water was pefetcly serene underneath the waves. The water was aquamarine in color, still pretty dimly lit, like it had it’s own light how I do not know, then the water became light blue as I swam deeper into the ocean and as I did I heard a voice all around me and Insae myself swimming but it didn’t look like me, I looked like young woman with eyes like an eagle and bronze colored hair. Then I remember a voice an inner voice inside my mind saying:

“You have to swim deeper than this, way further down in order to reach your desired goal.”

I swam deeper until I saw like a faint shift in the color of the water within my field of vision but further down, a border of blackness could be seen like an clear divide between the blue and unknown depths.

The voice said:

“The water around you is your mind in order to find what you seek, you must go deeper into your mind.”

The clear divide between scared me for some reason I really didn’t want to go in there.

The voice told me that I shouldn’t be afraid and:

“If you want to save him, you must swim in there into the unknown, only then will you find him.”

Doubtfully and seemingly very fearfully Inkept swimming deeper the water around me darkened and became more dark blue until it eventually became black. I was completely and utterly alone and I had left the safety and clarity of the water above where I could at least see what was going on, here I could be the prey of anything. I was my own light all of sudden an indigo aura surrounded me an lit up so that I could see my body and hands. The. The voice spoke once more:

“This your subconscious mind and a way to access it, remember that the water above represented your conscious mind? Well this is your subconscious where your dreams and desires can be planted made grow, nothing is out of your reach here, I suggest you use this gift well.”

And with that I saw myself gathering wave like energies from all around me coming in indigo sliver and making my aura go into a sphere of indigo, the power seemingly made my blood vessels light up in the same color and my eyes were glazed over with this misty white hue and when I saw these eyes that’s where I woke up.

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Dream Lucid Dream & Dream (s) - 2020-01-11T23:00:00Z

My dream recall has improved quite a bit since I began most of my dreams are dream junk but not this one though I feel it is pretty important at leats in this thread. What I mean by it is this.

I was standing in a nursing home for elderly and an old man that I know was sitting infront of a chair and since I know him I won’t descrive his appearence. However I held my hands in the Sha mudra:

With along with that I used a Mantra that’s not the one that usually goes a long with it which was:

Sakah Ramah Nasah Zuhl - I don’t speak the language which at least according to Koetting was a langauage that’s spoken in Tibet if I remember correctly and I’ll get back to you on that to be sure. However I know since I own the Compendium of Lucifuge that this mantra is included in that body of work, and I’ve used it myself to A) to connect with Ludcifuge and also amplify my connection the black star which is Lucifuge Rofocale, it produces a cold but burning sensation, similar to the feeling you get when you run your finger farily quickly through the flame of a candle. However I digress, while holding that mudra and giving I started to spin around in circles, widershins specifically, secondly my intent to heal so I visualized golden energy around and attempted to direct it into the old man the that end it is fair to mention that the old man in the drea were diagnosed with Dementia. However as I had spun around several times and had directed my intent thw way I described earlier. He has bcome younger and had grown wavy, shoulder length silvery hair, and instead of his blue eyes they were grey and he looked much more stern, kind of like how the emperor look like in the Draconian Tarort:

He looked several years younger like he was just about in his golden years. He then asked what I was doing to which I replied Magick. To which in turn replied:

“Well you can’t really perform things like this in public you know, however can you teach me?”

To which I replied that I could. And then the dream changed and connected to another of worky namely the Hekataeon. Where in that book there’s a working with one of Hekate’s aspects that called Brimo = the furious one. Along with a sigil in that book or rather a Glyph that represents that aspect of her, the glyph itself was ethereal white, surrounded by orange flames. As much as I’d want to show you the sigil I can’t due to copyright. Along with the imagery I heard the words: Brimo, Brimo, Brimm! - over and over and over until I woke up. If this is not spritual message I don’t know what is. But I need to decode it first as the is a really odd mix of several references to withcraft, some of which I know like the back of my hand and some of which I don’t. I’ll make an update later along with my application of this latter part of this:

With that I wish you guys the best in your ascent and personal evolution.

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