I’m so full of hate and rage I don’t recognize myself anymore.
I’m tired of being tired
Tired of these psychotic rage outbursts
Tired of chronic, unending sadness
Tired of constant, physical neck and back pain (I cannot afford treatment)
Tired of being broke
Tired of being picked on or challenged
Tired of being hopeless
Tired of not belonging.
Tired of having no family and friends
I’m think more and more about what it would be like to be dead every single day of my life.
I am a failure. I am a miserable disappointment and every day I open my God damned eyes I am reminded of the fact.
Nobody would miss me, nobody would care.
Everyone has left me, I have no physical support of any kind that I can rely on
I’m head over heels in debt and depression, I have to work to support myself, but all I want to do is sleep and stay unconscious. Nothing ever gets better. Life only gets worse and I only get angrier and less compassionate as I count my days.
I’m TRYING my best to go sober, and am immediately reminded of the fact of just how MISERABLE I truly am. I don’t expect overnight results.
I just want some God damned help.