whispers from the background
Sha 
dow work
(whenever the OP is ready, of course. Seriously, that shit fucks one up in addition)
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Hey can i ask ( sorry for derailing!) Have you done shadow work? If so, how long did the process take? Its something ive been thinking about for some time.
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Yes, and partly I am still working with it.
Eh, the major process (you know, the one where you want to quit just everything and go away and stuff) actual took weeks to a few months. Mine was topped with panic attacks I had to figure out.
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I think ive already started it then on some level 
thankyou. The only thing i worry about is immersing yourself so much in the shadows that it has a negative effect on your present, but I know in the long run its supposed to be very beneficial.
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You might encounter some negative/destructive effects on the present, yes. But in the end it actually shows you what you stored away for a longer period of time and what destroys you from the inside while you look away. It will make you most uncomfortable for certain but if Oddnan can do it (while lying on the floor and sobbing “I can’t do it” “I can’t take this anymore” “I CAN’T”) you can do it, too! 
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Haha thankyou 
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Right.
I have removed insulting comments attacking the person, not the topic itself, and responses to those, while leaving the text which was on topic in place, and added a single capital T to this post by @anon47811056 in order to prevent a sentence beginning with a lower-case letter.
My motivation here is to protect balance in this discussion.
I appreciate this is a topic which generates strong emotions based on personal experience because I have been there myself with “diagnoses” of things I was later able to fix myself.
But there is a human being here asking for support and that has to come first. So dial it down with the insults.
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I stay clear of medical advice and giving my opinion of someones state of mind because I am not them. Only they know what they go through. I’ll share an actual experience as as an example or guide to a resource that can actually benefit someone.
What I don’t do is de-rail peoples threads, pick fights with other members, and cause a general sensationalism just because I’m bored at home.
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Born a demon? What!? What are all these people going on about? Reading through all this, what your discussing has nothing to do with magic or the demonic but your own self hatred. You seem depressed because you have been bullied and have anger flashes and anger management issues.
I am sorry you’re an unhappy person. This isn’t demonic infestation or torment from a hex, you don’t have any of the signs, this isn’t a possession born with a demonic gene but your own unhappy life.
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Okay, i seem to find my way to threads like this so allow me to break this down and cover all the bases i can.
First off, to answer the initial question “can i be a demon?” Well, the origins of the word demon comes from the greek word daemon, which roughly translates to spirit (or as Socrates put it “divine principle or genius”). Seeing as you are essentially a spirit wearing a suit of flesh to exist in this world, you certainly can be considered a demon. The whole brimstone, horns and pitchfork aspects were just a politically convenient way of encouraging others not to worship beings not approved by the ruling power at the time. In that sense of the word, no you are not a demon. Just a troubled soul who has walked through hell to get here.
Now, no one on this forum can provide psychological help. That is not our job and resources have been provided for such as above. We can suggest rituals that may help but the actual treatment you will have to find else where. As always, I recommend the better help app if you are struggling financially to get said help.
That being said, I have written something in the past that helped me when I was in a dark time where my life could have very easily ended. It is a bit extreme but sometimes extreme measures cause big effects. DO NOT USE IT AS A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL HELP. I will not be responsible for it. Instead, use it as a supplement for your healing process. Hopefully it helps in some way
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Regardless whether you would be a demon (soul) or not, if you suffer from mental health issues, you better seek help.
You don’t need to spill your guts and tell them of the occult aspect of your life, but simply tell them your problem.
Hopefully, they’ll hook you up with meds that balance out your mood.
Been there done that, and my doctor don’t know about the occult connection to my moods.
Some people simply draw the shitty ticket in life.
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I will help you a little, based on the context of your plagued words: The scriptural diagnosis reflects in you a very acute cognitive dissonance (or cognitive dissonance); since his words give rise to a reflection: internal disharmony of the system of ideas, beliefs and emotions (cognitions), that is to say incompatibility of two simultaneous cognitions, all of which can impact on their attitudes giving rise to express or call themselves Demon .
The theory of cognitive dissonance fits from the medical point of view in its expressive qualification of itself. Festinger’s theory states that, when this incongruity or dissonance occurs in a very appreciable way, the person is automatically motivated to endeavor to generate new ideas and beliefs to reduce tension until they get the set of their ideas and attitudes fit together, constituting a certain internal coherence. Take into account an evaluation and treatment with a professional expert in intrapersonal psychology or (psychosociology) before mixing your untreated condition with the spiritual environment since it could cover your situation with events totally distant from your real picture .
I appreciate the input. Maybe in my brain I know I must not be a demon/evil, but in my heart I still believe it. It’s very difficult not to internalize it when you have an experience like mine in the world.
And I’ve seen professionals. Many. I’m on medicines and I’ve attempted the conventional treatments and tried to find rational answers and come up empty. That’s why Im looking towards other possibilities.
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I just want to say first off whoa whoa sah Abit ok you are not a demon and furthermore what you know as a Christian may not seem right to you at the moment due to everything you have probably been through in life it sucks not knowing why it is happening and feeling like your alone and have been casted out…
Most of us if not all know what you are going through
You need to know you are NOT alone and maybe read post on here about everything you need to know…
I don’t want to tell you your God isn’t blah this or that but I can and will tell you everything isn’t as it seems and isn’t as bad as it seems…
Demons aren’t any kind of evil they help you with life and guide you like angles do…
They just want to be treated with respect
As for the hand you were delt in this life only you can make it better or worse
You have to take the first step to making a change in your life once you do life will change for the better…it will all turn around
And if you don’t know how well use magic you came to balg for a reason right?
Become the person you see your self to be and you will be free of your problems that are laid out before you…
Take off the shakles that bind you and learn live be happy and be free
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My friend, first let me say I’m terribly sorry to hear that life has been so hard on you. It’s easy to spiral into hopelessness, and can be terribly hard to build your self-worth up from nothing without a good support structure on which to base it. The most important thing is to know that you’re not alone, and it’s good that you have professional help in your life, according to your later post. Medicine is as much a practice as spiritual pursuits, so results always improve with time. Many of us here have experience with ongoing mental health issues, and if you’ve been unfairly mistreated in the past on account of these, I hope this environment will prove an improvement on that.
I think you can safely rest assured that you aren’t a demon, nor are you likely to become one, nor an angel- and that’s probably best. As a human, being, your capacity for positive change and healing is far greater, and your nature far more mercurial than can be boiled down into such black and white terms. Most here would probably agree that spiritual hierarchy is far from black and white; the Judeo-Christian spiritual worldview is unfortunately rather lacking in nuance that way. Of course, if you’re looking for a replacement, you’ve probably come to the right place.
I don’t know if it helps, but it was my experience that the time in which my family devoutly followed Christianity were the most spiritually isolating and emotionally abusive years of my young life. Especially for someone who doesn’t fit into the mold of “the good Christian” identity, the sort of things which are supposed to “Help” you be less “Broken” and “Sinful” only feed into that cycle of powerlessness and dependency. It was helpful to me in my teenage years to distance myself from that perspective of the world in order to reclaim my sense of self and begin rebuilding my life. Just a thought.
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I second that from my experiences, full of arrogant pisshead dicks who think they are who knows what just cause they got a degree
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Are you sure you are not exagerrating?
Take it step by step, have you had any metaphysical experiences or powers that indicate you might have a special bloodline? If not, do not come to such extravagant assumptions simply due to your own fear of your dark nature, a lot of people are dark as hell, its the times, Kali Yuga, dark ages and what not.
If you have had metaphysical experiences that may make you think you were a demon in your previous life, then from here it is up to you, if you are willing to light up your darkness there is always a chance, pray to God for help and a sign, if it helps you, pray to the Archangels for help or Jesus
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Okay now we know you’re sorted for mundane medical stuff, try reading this:
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I agree with @UnseelieDiabolus on this one, SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP!!! AND do the LBRP. yep two birds one stone guys, that simple. 