Good eve, practitioners of magick. I will for here, go by Enigma. Enclosed is a tale that beckons the wisest to respond, as to decipher, enlighten, and advise on how best to proceed. For all intents and purposes i will use the names i used back when i was 16, followed by the new names i believe are closer to those mentioned in this tale.
When i was 16 i was in a residential home, a group home of foster kids that had no families that would take them in due to age. I was nearing the time my mother would obtain custody of me legally again when this occured. I, being the curious kid, started reading into Pagan Magicks, and was given a few books, one was the Necronomicon. ( before anyone flames me about h.p. love craft lore being fiction, read on please) not knowing at the time the writings of HP lovecraft, I took it very seriously.
I began with taking my necklace, and inscribing the symbol Agga, as to represent the elder gods, on the backside of the pendant. The pendant was of Pertho ( á ) and here comes my first question. Can runes overlap to create a binding rune, when they are on opposite sides of a pendant. If so, this would mean I had created a binding rune with Pertho reversed. It would explain the later issues.
While at this residential I got into an altercation with another kid, and so one night, I prepare to astral travel, to seek an entity that could help me âpunishâ this kid. I remember it not working right away ( probably because Cthulhu has no exact comparable version in other Pantheons. ( if so please correct me) That is when everything went dark.
I thought I heard either 1 audible voice and 1 telepathic, or what I now think, was 2 distinct audible voices. I asked for help to punish this kid. What I remember hearing before the next event was âblood for blood, we are in Accordâ
I awake to paramedics working on me, removing a metal coat hanger I apparently stabbed myself in the forearm with. I was sent to a psych hospital, for self harm. I explained I donât recall what happened ( hiding what they may have known from the scene of where they found me, ring of salt makeshift altar, etc. during my 2 week stay, that kid is discharged from the residential. 1 month later, he is hit by a car. The moment I heard this news, I recall my pineal gland burning. Cut to 20 years later, as nothing I learned further in the arts had any effects, I was not able to Astral project or travel since, when before I was quick to learn and had gotten the hang of it.
20 years after this incident, I have my emotional support cat put down after he sustained injuries my vet couldnât explain, he was found somewhere he couldnât have gotten to if he was hit by car or attacked by coyote. My wife, who is Wiccan , felt as she stated " insanely nasty and violent energies around (my cat) when never she felt them before. That night, I accidentally Astral project for the first time in a long time, enjoyed myself, but when returning to my body, I saw a shadow being, with wings, just waiting. Fortunately my wife had awoken to the other cats going crazy, and it left, and I returned and woke up.
This is my hypothesis. The binding rune I made may have allowed access to higher entities but with great risk. I might have made a bargain with Cthulhu, or the Mesopotamian counterparts that are closest, the twins Lamahu and Lamhu. I may have missed or they misunderstood my intention was not death to the kid, but the contract I feel had something to do with my spiritual abilities being siphoned/ dampened. I feel that my cat Dante fought with the astral beingâs minion that was tasked with the siphon maintenance over the years, and broke me free of it, violating the contract. I performed a safe and easy of passage ritual asking Bastet and Sekmet to assist him. The night of that ritual was windy, and raining. My candle had little protection yet it stayed lit the entire life of the candle . The energies were amazing, I felt nothing like it in so long.
But I wonder now, Iâm not done with whomever, and Iâve been cautious in retelling this, because of ridicule, amongst other reasons. What can I do? Iâve been told by my Patron Athena ( also refered to as Ishtar/ Innana) that there is a great task I must do, with two options, one will allow my continued reincarnation cycles, the other⌠Will stop it. I am married to my twin flame, and through our dark night of the soul we both are currently experiencing, these portents seem dismal. I appreciate your time taken to hear my tale. I appreciate any advice. Fare thee well, and blessed be.