Hello everyone! It’s been a while, since I posted. I hope you’re all doing great!
I’ve been actively manifesting and using magic for 4-5 years now, yet never had any success.
I first started with demons. I was very inexperienced and thought the demon just snaps his fingers and voìla, there’s what you asked for . But that’s obviously not how that works.
It was a great lesson, though. I wanted a girlfriend, yet I acted like a pathetic loser, kind of insecure, unmanly weasel lol. I’m still pretty young so I am in a phase of getting to know me/building up my character.
After about 2 years, my life was boring, always the same stuff. Get up, go to school, come back home, play a game, go back to sleep, wake up …
I wanted my life to change drastically. And since magic did not yield any results, I moved on from it and started diving into the Law of Attraction, oh boy, what a nightmare that was.
So basically the law of attraction is: think positively, don’t have doubts/don’t think about it. It’s basically reprogramming your mind becuase we as a society have been programmed to think a certain way. It seemed pretty legit. Growing up as a muslim I was kinda trained to eat everything my mother put on the plate and well I got very fat, very quickly.
So I felt that it was correct in some areas and I tried it out. After a few weeks nothing had changed. Nothing. Still the same boring life, no friends, no girlfriend, nothing.
During that time I was entering a new school, 11th grade. I was sooo excited. I visualized having friends, girlfriend, a lot of fun, basically the perfect school life that is being portrayed in the movies. Bruh that failed so hard lmao.
I didn’t really like my class, so I was alone most of the time and the friends I garnered quickly started talking behind my back. God I am now in 12th grade and it still didn’t get better.
This really bothered me because when people tend to dislike me, especially like 10 people, I believe there’s something wrong with me. I thought maybe I am a narcissist asshole, who steps over people or something. So I tested it out, being as nice and sweet as possible. Results were the same.
I shared my experiences on the LoA subreddit and it was all telling me that I was attracting these feelings and bad things because I am a negative person and the post was prove of my “Toxicity”
So I blatantly asked someone: “If a woman were to get raped, did she attract that?”
They basically said that I am very toxic and I couldn’t possibly compare that. I read up on it and in Esther Hicks’s book, she basically said that the victim and the attacker are both “co-creators” of that situation and the victim attracted that, just as much as the attacker did. Nice victim blaming.
I really don’t wanna pull a Tim Pool and be like: “You know I am so great, it’s everyone elses fault”, but I have no idea what the hell is going on.
So one day I stumbled across a YouTube channel that talked about the Law of Assumption, basically everything you assume, will turn out to be true. The woman in the video told me to ignore my reality and when people insult me, for example, imagine that they complement me.
That already is a very delusion way of living life, but nonetheless I gave it a shot and for a few months I lived the life of a delusional nutjob. One day, I completely broke down and realized that this whole Law Of This, Law of that, is just total nonsense.
So I returned to demons. I wanted to punish someone, who had hurt me pretty badly. Didn’t work either.
So now I am here. Asking for some advice. Maybe I am so utterly delusional or psychotic that I don’t see what’s going on.
If the “law” of attraction or whatever, was really a law, it would always work, just like the law of gravity, but it doesn’t. So it’s not a law. Not to mention the people who promoted the LOA are complete scammers. These videos expose them pretty well
Anyways I need some assistance, advice, insults, anything that will light the bulb in my small head and make me realize how to turn my boring life into something worth living.
Thanks for reading