There is two, very memorable and incredible part of my life, and these are still a mystery to me, what are changed my whole life and my “conception” of life (and so much more).
Curing my kidney cancer
When I started the high school, I felt into a deep depression. Grewing up without a father, and with an ignorant, narcissist mother was very hard. Got no support, advice, care at all, and it was from my birth.
I was absolutely alone. Sad, angry I hated everyone. My negative emotions left their marks on my physical health as well. After two near relatives death (I caused one of them; I’ve killed my grandma), at that Winter doctors are diagnosed me with kidney cancer.
I didn’t care about it too much, at all. I had enough of my life, and somewhere deep inside I knew that I’ve caused this to myself, no doubt. I knew things already about these. I spent a lot of time in a hospital, and before my final test, well… that night was horrible.
I was half asleep, and in… a totally different “state”, but wasn’t the physical plane (I saw “scenes” from both planes, alternately). - Radiant Light figures are appeared above me, starring at me. I was unable to see their faces. They’re was tall, possibly males with glowing orange, gold and white auras.
I felt that They’re wanted something to me, but I didn’t know, what. Then I suddenly started to feel something horrible pain. It burned me. My whole body was in fire, inside and outside. I’ve experienced several horrible things before it (for example, when you are get cut open, and doctors cleaning your flesh and organs from deadly infection through those cuts - this was an another horrible experience to me; a dangerous bacterial infections). My skin was wet, and burning body or not, in the same time I felt myself like I’m shivering and will freeze to death.
Tears appeared in the corner of my eyes, and everything what I wanted in that moment was nothing more just the death, the end of my all suffering. But I didn’t die; a sudden black out - and these lights, and all of my pain disappeared.
I woke up in the morning. Before the final tests to my operation. My doctor leaded me and I have to meet again these horrible machines. When we finished, he asked me to stay outside, in the waiting room with my mother.
10-15 minutes later he suddenly appeared again, and asked us to let’s go in, then he showed to us my results: my cancer vanished!. Can not see it on the fresh pictures - He He bombed me with confused questions, and all of us was shocked. The doctor told us to go out, and wait again, because he have to convene a concilium and he want to call an another doctor from Germany.
After long hours, he confronted us with the facts: that the chances that this happens is nearly impossible. He saw this first in his lifetime during his work. They was confused, because of my surgery. They didn’t wanted operate me without reasons, so I have to wait some days for another tests, then everything went clear - I’m healthy.
And at this point, I’ve started thinking about my pathetic depression (because after these, my depression seemed nothing more to me just pathetic).
When I was a little child, I fel into a deep pool. There was a big drain on its bottom, absolutely unseen for me under the dark water, and it had a big suction power. No one noticed me, even my mother neither (who totally changed after my fathers death, she did not take care of me at all, so my Demons did) and others around me.
I was sure in I’ll getting drowned then die after I fell into that big stuff. Can’t fight against the pressure as a tiny little girl, under the water. I’ve still was able to heard the birds’ song above me, the children happy laughter, playing with their parents, and the blue sky, with the shiny Sun’s light. Then I realised: " I’ll die here… so soon …Can not be true. " - I thought. But the seconds are just gone, and I was slowly out my last breathe. " So this is how it will end? " - asked from myself.
But in the final second then… a huge, white-gold light surrounded me. I saw nothing but that light. And in an another second, an unknow “power” pushed me out of the water, just like a ragdoll. I was able to breath again, and slowly I started to realize that I’m still alive. I tried to find who saved me (around me) but can’t find anyone… No one even watched me, or was in the near, at all. I just get saved…
These golden-white lights are appeared and surrounded me every time when I was near to the death.
Still don’t know surely, “who was that”. Whatever was it, somehow I’ve outplayed de death’s several forms,and after I’ve survived the kidney cancer in that wonderful way, I had enough of my weakness. It was a huge change in my life, and everything mysteryous “support” from my support has motivated me.