The Ritual of the Neutron Star

I found the entry for Monday, Nov 19th in Dee & Kelly’s records (Mysteriorum Libri Quinque, Sloane 3188, Klein paperback pg IV-16) to be rather interesting. I have lines to do so I’ll only include a few excerpts, but all of it was divinatory. When doing this sort of divination, similar to divination through fiction (books, tv shows, manga, also webcomics, memes, etc), it’s not always one-to-one literally 100% accurate. I tend to pick up what it’s conveying without much confusion, even when exact details of the characters’ situations differ in places from my/others’ situations.

Before I type this up, I think it is important to remember that if your intention is to perform magick with intensity, things will probably get intense, and if you need to take the proverbial chill pill, that’s probably a good idea. I haven’t even started on it yet and the earth-side Loagaeth table 6 is already hitting pretty hard. I think this can apply even moreso when doing more “mystical” magick, or any magick that makes you confront the magickal experience of your own mind very directly. There’s not much point if you really do drive yourself bonkers. Just relax.

The following is all a quote from D&K’s records (again Mysteriorum Libri Quinque, Sloane 3188, Klein paperback pg IV-16, look at me go, citing my sources, oh yeah). I omit random Latin in some places. Note also that ‘i’ is sometimes pronounced as ‘j’, or at least that’s what it looks like.

If you’re into reading wacky magick experiences, there’s a lot more where this one came from. Note that EK is Edward Kelly (I’m pretty sure, Dee also worked with other scryers at some point), D is John Dee, BOBOGEL is a spirit, and (spirit) is a spirit marked in the book by its sigil and I don’t currently recall its name. Here they are scrying into a stone. I believe EK did all the scrying and saw/heard the spirits, Dee did lots of praying and also asked them questions and interpreted the received material while EK was in full-on receive mode.

EK - Then stept oute 9, at ones.
Then the great man returned, or was restored to his former estate of three particular men agayn: and they three leaned to the Ientleman with the Cape on his sholder.

BOBOGEL - Dee, Dee, Dee, at length, but not to late.

EK - In the pace of the former first Thre, appeared L E E.
Of the 9, which stept out, they of the first Ternarie, sayd, eche thus orderly
1 Volumus.
2 Possumus.
3 Quid non.
[random Latin, societate]

EK - They became one man, as the other before, but a slender and a weak one neyther so high as the first: ever laboring or striving with it self to stand up right, but still it bended, bowed, and inclined downward, as thowgh it wold fall for feblenes. The Body of this Compownd man, seamed to be of Gold glittering. When they retorned to theyr distinct shape: they semed naked and to be sorry, and lament: And Bobogel did part them from him, with his sworde, skabbard and all, as it hanged by his side.

Theyr letters were, N A R.
Then cam the Ternarie - B L N, and orderly they sayd this:
1 Ab illo.
2 Per illum.
3 Cum illo.
[random Latin]

EK - This Ternarie of men becam to have one onely hed, and three bodyes, and that one hed was in good proportion.

The side of the Diaphonous Globe opened, and this Transformed Ternarie did point into it, toward the multitude: and the people had theyr brests naked and semed to wepe: and to wipe theyr brests, and where they wiped the place becam fayre.

This Ternary did seme to stand uppon a triangular stone, and to turne (as a horsmyll doth, abowt one axeltree) orderly agaynst, and by, the hole of the Globe so opened, and every of the three bodyes, in theyr turning, as they cam agaynst the open place of the Globe, they extended, and stretch out theyr hands toward the people: The first seamed to hold a rownd ball in his hand being little, but very fayre white.
The second body, his hand had in it, a little sword flamming with fyre.
The third had a thing like a hatt band of lawn, of many collours, which ever as his turne cam to be agaynst the opened hole, he seamed to cast toward the people, and the people did seme to be drawn to him ward, by the Casting of it toward them.
These Three bodyes, thowgh they turned contynually, yet did the face or Cowntenance of that One Compownd hed, stedyly and immoveably regard, or loke into the Globe at the forsayd hole therof.

(spirit) - A wonder to behold the heven, much more this.

[random stuff worth reading but not as relevant or cool]

EK - Then cam the Ternarie A N A.
They sayd, orderly thus,
1 Ab illo sed. (the illo sed is random Latin I like what I like ok)
2 Cum illo sed. Looking on his own belly.

D - Then I demaunded of theyr
Apparayle: and EK sayd that
these were braver than the former Ternary.

[random stuff]

EK - They ioyne to gither into one hed and three bodyes.
The Hole of the Globe opened very wyde now.
This one compownd Hed had many eyes, many noses, many mowthes, as thowgh it were a Cahos of Faces, in one hed, but three bodyes. One of this bodyes had in his hand a little Ball, like the other before, very white, but with twynkling brightnes in it.
The other two bodyes, theyr hands were emptie.
They turn in order agaynst the Hole of the Globe. But the People regarded them not: but at the comming of the hand with the Ball, against the hole, the people loked a little up at it.
Bob. sayd, [random Latin, ignis]
These, being dissolved into theyr former state, go and sit (with hevy chere) by them that sat affar of from BOBOGEL. Theyr apparaill semed to be simple: theyr good apparayle was gone.

[text]

EK - They are divided into the day, as the other wer, before: But wheras the other are chiefly uppon that day which you call Monday, so ar these to be used onely on the Sabaoth day (Sunday).
Theyr use, is onely thus (observing the former order) with the Circle uppon the grownd.

[text]

The Letters onely where they stode, are theyr names and Characters. What doth the heven behold or the earth conteyne, that is not (or may be) subdued, formed and made by these?
What lerning, grownded uppon wisdome, with the exellencies in Nature, cannot they manifest?

One in heven they know.
One and all in Man, they know.
One and all in erth, they know.

Measure heven by a parte, (my meaning is, by these few).
Let God be Glorifyed: His name praysed.
His Creation well taken: and his Creatures, well used.

D - I craved for some playner Instructions, as concerning the use of these, and he answered.

(spirit) - Behold Are thy eyes so blynde ? Dost thow see and wilt not see? They mynde telleth the: Thy understanding furdereth, and they iudgment doth establish it: That as thow sawest a Body in three places, and of Three Compositions: Thowgh but two in forme. So shall this work have relation to tyme present and present use, to Mysteries far exceding it. And Finally to a purpose and intent, wherby the Maiestie, and Name of God shall and may, and of force must appeare, with the Apparition of his wonders, and mervayles, yet unhard of.

[text]

EK - He that sayd this, is as thowgh he were a king, with a crown on his hed: His apparayle was a long robe whitish: But his left arme was very white, and his right arme black.
Then cam after this King a Cumpany of 42: and every one of them had a letter in his forhed, and they were 7 in a row and 6 downward.

[text]

EK - The cloth draws.

Aren’t you ever curious to see what would happen?

I’m going to dip for a bit. The demonic side of an Earth table is hitting about as you’d expect, more a shattering gut punch than a creeping erosion, and I feel like vomitting. I’d rather not do that in the “public” eye. I’ll be checking back here for the upcoming empowerments, so if you PM me I should respond, otherwise I’ll be meditating through all the noise.

To be honest I may peace out until the next empowerments are needed. I like writing, I like providing guidance in magickal practice, but I can’t do that unless I am fully secure in my own mind. This isn’t my first rodeo with these sorts of things, and the last time this sort of stuff happened, those events were what enabled me to walk the path I ended up walking, which provided me with many opportunities I would not have otherwise had. And not just like “learning opportunities,” I mean like financial opportunities, social opportunities, normal things to help me live in the world that would not have been possible for me without the changes I went through.

I have to put myself first. This is not even close to as bad as it has gotten before, though. I don’t like to be a DOOMmonger, but with all these simple magick books out there, and all this talk of how easy and low-key it all is, I like to be real about what can happen if you really go deep with the practice, especially if you do some of the more “hardcore” practices. I imagine I’m not the only one who tends to do this, and I like to be the one to validate people having experiences they were not prepared for and to help them get to a more stable and functional place. I don’t think the danger is really self-delusion, although I’ve seen that, but not being able to handle what happens to you when you summon these powers. The people who would roll their eyes at that statement I’m guessing haven’t ever tried it before. It’s not always the most pleasant experience, and I have seen it break people.

When I see people in this kind of spot, my advice is usually to push through. Lay off when you have to lay off, but otherwise if you don’t keep going, you leave the process unfinished, and that tends to mean leaving all the toxic emotions unresolved and very active in your daily thoughts. At worst you gain some insight into how your mind works and what’s going on within it, but don’t gain the insight that comes after that which is what stabilizes you and brings peace. People tend to not like to talk about the potential dangers that can come with doing various practices within your mind that are absolutely foreign to most people’s experience. At least we tend to not get burnt at the stake anymore, or lobotomized, or tortured, or any of that. I still don’t really talk about this stuff elsewhere, though. I live with the results of my practices and the enjoyment I feel from doing them. I don’t need to share this part of myself with people who either don’t care or are afraid.

I’m curious to see where the dream practice will be by next time, dear readers. I’ll presumably actually be on top of my meditation practice, so presumably it will go quite reasonably.

Ok it’s been a bit I’m back now.

I don’t know if anyone really cares, but after getting absolutely blasted I’ve done some serious re-considering of my practice. I will now elaborate. I don’t really hold back on this one, so if some parts are confusing, don’t worry about it and just take away what is useful to you or enjoy some perhaps entertaining occult content. I’m really doing this for me anyways.

The Loagaeth tables seem to do things, but fuck me is it just boring having to do this on top of other rituals. I’m thinking this - you work through all the Keys using the ritual method I’ve laid out here, so that’s about two years, doing the ritual 4 times per week. Other days you still meditate (probs just 1 hour mindfulness) and can do Universal Magick if you want to do a ritual. After completing the Keys, if you’re still feelin like Enochian, you can then spend the time you’d be doing the ritual of the Key writing out the tables, doing one per week. After you have your tables, then you could speak the Keys again and do Loagaeth rituals alongside them. Armchair, you might say? Perhaps indeed. But perhaps not. Perhaps it is the case that first attaining a foundation of stable skills in concentration and dream practice, along with insights from meditation and the rituals, is required to access the full potential of the Loagaeth magick. I have briefly noted these possibilities already. Exponentially expanding time via the dream state, something that has already been achieved before at least to a limited extent (with someone living a life for decades in the dream state while mere hours passed, to my recollection), is an appealing goal. Dipping into the dream state is also an appealing goal. It’s not exactly choosing to manifest yourself in the material realm if you can’t also choose to not do that. There are also the insights into magickal reality. I think it may be the case that a foundation of meditative insights from vipassana are first needed or at least recommended to prevent becoming “lost in the content.”

Meditation poses a few questions. Mindfulness of the sensations of the breath at the tip of the nose for one hour daily, to me, is the core that should not be removed unless all you’re doing is meditating with no magick. Working up to one hour is totally fine. I have tried “zhine” style meditation, where you gaze at an external object, and this remains an option. But fire kasina is just oh so appealing. I have only read accounts of what others have experienced with little practice on my own so far, but this style apparently lets you see displays of vibrant color that form from the after-image of light. The material I have read (and am reading) on this practice was mostly about practitioners on intensive retreats, but I am curious about the potential abilities that could be gained from more consistent practice across time, especially given what has been achieved on retreats. I have already experienced improvements to my internal color visualization abilities from chakra work, and I wonder if energy work combined with fire kasina could lead to something interesting. Or you could just get good at the dream practice where all this is hilariously, hilariously easier. You don’t have to have extreme concentration to draw colors in the air in a dream. But can someone else share that experience with you, as has been accomplished in the material world on retreat? Now that is an interesting question.

If you have been around, you may know some of the things I have received. There’s the ritual at the top of the thread, but there’s been other stuff as well. Perhaps it is the case that sensations may arise in the dream state in a unified mind, and these sensations then remembered by a fragmented collection of minds. If you have a dream practice, perhaps you have experienced dreams where you inhabited a body other than your waking state body, or where you were not embodied at all, but were just aware of sensations that arose. This happens to me quite regularly. I wonder what happens when insight is deepened and there is even less identification with an ego or delusion about the illusory sensations of duality, subject and object, self and other.

Good ole magick and spirituality - boundaries don’t exist but they also do! What the fuck dude.

Just to be clear, I do not advise assaulting people. That’s a good way to bring the power of the state down upon thee, and historically speaking that tends to go well for the state.

When I speak about these practices, you should realize that I am referring to completely fictional characters, events, locations, and am engaging in speculative worldbuilding. None of this is real, and anything that seems to refer to actual people or such things is actually referring to fictional things. I do practice the creation of fictional events, after all.

What’s even really the difference between the people you meet while awake and the people you meet in dreams? What happens if you have a certain dream character whom you regularly interact with in lucid dreams, when you are more-or-less fully aware that your experience is a dream? What if you have sex with them, hang out with them, go and explore beautiful dream vistas? What if you come to experience feelings of love for this dream character? Are you deluding yourself? Is it delusional to experience love for a dog, or a child to love a doll? Is it delusional to feel sad when a character dies in a movie? Are the fears people experience in nightmares “not real”? Are the recurring PTSD dreams I used to have, which I would wake up from with a racing heart and an intense dread, “not real”?

What exactly makes your subjective experience of dreams any different from your personal, subjective, lived experience of waking life? If your answer is clarity of experience, that’s because you’re ignorant and unaware because you haven’t practiced meditation or dream yoga, which means that your waking life is also extremely lacking in clarity, but you are too unaware and ignorant to realize that, so not a good answer. The Enochian Keys have made waking sensations more vivid and beautiful, and dream practice does the same to dream experience. But waking life people are “out there.” You may have a point, but that depends on what exactly is going on with the physical world. I would say that dream characters are also usually “out there” in that you perceive them as beyond yourself, but that’s not what you meant before, and I can’t claim to know something I don’t actually know. I’ll leave that at that for those actually doing the practices.

But regardless, you say, dream characters aren’t aware, they’re just like robots controlled by your subconscious. There are very, very, very few exceptions (most of those being people here) to the fact that pretty much every single person I have ever met has been extremely unaware. They tend to get all fuckin grumbly and pissy when you say that, but that doesn’t mean it’s a lie. Ever tried meditating before? What do you think it means that after setting the intention to focus on your breath, you cannot count to 10 breathes without your mind wondering off? It sounds to me like you were unaware of what was happening in your mind. Nah man, I was just like, bored. It’s so boring, how could anyone do that. Of course I know what I’m thinking. Oh my phone just vibrated. What was that? Wait who texted me? Wow, what a bitch. (I wonder what she’s doing.)(that was 10x faster than the other thoughts) [physical stomach sensation][negative emotional response to sensation] Fuck I’m hungry. Oh, this guy just said something to me. (a sandwich sounds nice) What an asshole, calling me unaware. “What was that? Sorry, I was distracted.” Also, I’m not a man or a guy, nor can I claim to know if those thoughts actually arose or if they were just implied by their combination of various verbal and non-verbal behaviors. Yes, you can sometimes catch the really fast ones if you know how to look. Nah man, you can’t read me, you just think you’re some edgy fuck. Ok my dude, you go on ahead and enjoy that belief.

I’ll conclude today with a bit of a random note. I am on the second level of sigils in the [Name] working with a spirit partner (the second level beneath Sex, Together, Apart, Sharing, so Male, Mind, Trust, Thoughts). It seems that regardless of whether or not it could be said that the other being is aware or even “real,” if you are skilled in receiving spirit communication (and have done so in the past, which led to benefits in your life), then you can go through this magick and experience its benefits. I began this working some months after getting into sex magick. I’ve also tried this working with others (spirit and not), and also some other versions that came before this one, but none other than my partner have passed the Together vibe check and so are no longer in my life. If the vibes turn bad, the magick is probably over. I can speak from personal experience and say that few things are as annoying as someone who persists in the face of a definitive and clear no. I’ve also seen enough to know that it is wise to err on the safe side, especially with women who may be afraid, for whatever reason, and giving in to pressure out of fear of violence.

Regardless, I have derived much learning and pleasure from these experiences. I don’t think it is particularly wise to hastily assume things, but if you are pretty sure that you aren’t just talking to yourself because strange things just keep happening, even when you go out of your way to not look for them, and you are not causing harm or discomfort to other people (so not being a fuckin creep), then I think it is good to remain open to the possibilities and also continually check yourself (on that note, I’ve been getting the idea to do the [Name] working with my partner but on myself). If someone is rather adamant that you not doubt them, you should probably doubt them extra hard. Regardless of what may be really going on here, it is clear to me that the magick has caused dramatic emotional healing, most definitely in myself, and has given me many insights. I think it does the opposite of encouraging you to be a recluse who only desires dream experiences. Well, I still certainly desire dream experiences and believe that these can fulfill the desire for certain experiences that may be rather difficult or outright impossible to have in the waking state, but I also want to have a normal-ish life. Too normal and it’s just so, so lame. I don’t get how people manage to live like that. Well I suppose I kinda do actually. They live in fear and have vaguely miserable lives. Gross. And not the senpai kimo <3 kind, like kimochi warui, your mere presence elicits a negative emotional response within me. Too weird though and magick has to kick-in and make you go rub dirt on your feet and run around or do yoga or something.

I suppose where you are on the normal-weird spectrum is up to you. My aim is to channel the best of both.

Experiment boldly, dear readers.

I’m not trying to be a spammer but this is a good way to unravel my thoughts. I could write in my personal journal but maybe this is useful. I’ll probably return to more of a weekly schedule after passing through this stage/phase/transition period.

I feel as though I have been shown what could be considered an “end point” for spiritual practice. Let’s say you “get there.” You are now a fully awakened Source-Being. Now what? Turn it off and then back on again?

Let’s say that you achieve what very well may be possible to achieve within your current lifetime and are able to experience infinite time in an environment that is completely malleable by your awareness. What do you do, literally for forever?

How does it make you feel, to contemplate such a vast stretch of experience before you?

I do not like to make assumptions or blindly adopt beliefs just because they are passed down in spiritual traditions which I study and practice. It is widely believed, or at least taught, in Buddhist and other circles that after death of the physical body, there is some sort of continuity that carries over into another physical life. Reincarnation and past lives are said to continue on until you awaken and then that stops. Perhaps you already see an issue with the idea that you have a chain of past lives, linked together one after the other, when there is also the idea that spiritual being is beyond linear time.

I am rather skeptical of this, but at the same time, I have had an experience where I seemed to connect with an ancestor or past life (more likely a past life as he is from the other side of the world as my ancestors, to my knowledge). This was a relatively brief, one-off experience, but in terms of synchronicity, in terms of quantity of people, the majority of the girls I have been on dates with have been of this ethnicity. Sounds like a dodgy piece of evidence to me. But this was also an experience I had which I did not seek out. I have pretty much always felt more comfortable around these sorts of people than the majority (not all, but the majority) of the people that have been around me, even with a bit of a language barrier. But which way around does this go? Is my mind just making shit up based on my collection of life experiences?

Last night (well this morning), I had a dream where I was in a car, but I wasn’t sure if I was the person driving the car or the person in the backseat. The other person offered to let me be the driver. At no point did the bodies move. When you have this sort of experience often enough, in dreams and in waking life, it really loosens up your conception of what “you” are. If it is true that consciousness continues on after death in some sort of way, then it doesn’t make much sense to fear death of the physical body cause you’ll just get another one. It makes much more sense to fear ignorance. Presumably, it is possible to attain a state of being where you are more aware of this post-death transition phase when it happens and so are able to control what occurs, manifesting yourself into another body or presumably just hanging out. Even if you are ignorant, presumably you just get reincarnated anyways, but if you’re not ignorant then you get to control what occurs.

Let’s say that all this bardo/purgatory stuff is reasonably accurate (hell would be the physical world, in that way of describing it - saying that demons reside in heaven is strange but that’s why I don’t just believe stuff without thinking about it). What’s so special about humans? Do your emotions carry over?

The problem with all of what I have been saying is that it relies on intellectualizing. If you do not believe that magick is a real thing, then all of this is complete, total, absolute garbage nonsense and a waste of time, or perhaps you’ll think, oh, that’s nice for them, they have false beliefs that make their life easier. Luckily for me, the superior being, I have no such delusions. I pity them, waddling around, blind and stupid. God damn I’m so fucking smart. And isn’t it great to have people like this. Just existing next to them demonstrates the glory of my being. Perhaps if they beg I will allow them to lap the water of my attention from the palm of my hand.

But what if you do believe that magick is a real thing, perhaps because you have witnessed things that defy ordinary logic, that have filled you with despair as your entire worldview gets turned upside down by the undeniable reality of what you have seen. No, not even that vision which came true to the letter or whatever, I mean the stuff that happened in the physical world outside of yourself that affected other people which you asked for in a magick ritual. Maybe the first few times you could write it off as coincidence pretty easily. But what about when it just keeps fucking happening, over and over and over again? You look back, and everything, EVERYTHING worked out just so fucking exactly like you needed it to. But I didn’t ask to be born into this shit world, unto these even shitter people, surrounded by shit for most of my life, forced to crawl on your hands and knees through piles of shit, forced to eat shit and smile and say that you’re grateful for it. Did you though? Even if you didn’t, at a certain point things started lining up. At least that’s what happened to me. Every relationship, every decision be it mine or others, every event, every piece of information forgotten or remembered, it all lines up.

Every fucking last bit of it. I would not be where I am today if things had not gone how they did, with very little room for variation. That statement would be more banal if where I am today was different than it is. It is like every barrier between me and self-actualization has been being obliterated.

Some musings on Universal Magick today and elemental magick in general. I think I’ll start by talking about some of the powers and then there’ll be some tips on using the magick and crafting requests to maximize your success rate.

The three demonic powers are quite interesting. Before I get into that, these are the elemental correspondences:

South - Air
East - Fire
North - Earth
West - Water

These differ from certain sources and traditions. These are the correspondences that I use and believe to be true for Enochian magick. But that’s not what the Golden Dawn said! The Golden Dawn seems to me like the public pool. Anyone can get into the Golden Dawn, and anyone can ascend up in the organization and so feel important cause they have subordinates. Just because they were the loudest and most accessible doesn’t mean they were correct. I benefit from all the edgelords who kept their stuff secret and probably still mostly do. Fine with me. I care about the magick more than I do the personalities. If you are hesitant to perform the RotNS because of my personality, I suppose that’s your problem, my dude.

There are three demonic powers (in this magick):

Corruption - Water
Decay - Air
Fortune - Fire

These are all interesting. Note that all that follows is my interpretation of the powers and should be treated accordingly. Corruption seems to me to be, in a way, the most “fundamental” demonic power (in this magick). If things were devoid of corruption, then all would rest in perfect knowledge, and so there would be no suffering.

Decay, though, is associated with Air, the element which rules over the others in Lucifer magick. So perhaps decay is more fundamental than corruption, but why would a being of absolute knowledge decay if there were not some sort of corruption to this “perfection?”

I have said before that I like to “double-tap” with these powers. One focuses on the other, and one on the self. But which is which? Water is often associated with emotions, and Air with thoughts and more intellectual things, as well as pure awareness. Personally, I have Corruption focus on the other. Both powers affect others, but in terms of the wording of the requests/phrases, it feels more effective to ask for both aspects of the end result - the removal of the negative other and the manifestation of the new positive state of being you will have. The author suggests that Decay not be used on yourself, and the author is pretty cheeky, so I don’t always take what they say at face-value.

Notice that Corruption calls upon a demon of corruption and disease, while Decay calls upon a demon of transformation. Note also that the powers of Corruption and Decay go beyond these individual demons and include the whole “stack” of beings in the sigils. It feels more appropriate to me to set a demon of corruption and disease upon my enemies, and to call upon an Air demon of transformation to suffocate away whatever hold my enemies may have had upon my mind. I believe that both of these powers affect both the self and others, but in terms of ritual practice, these are my thoughts.

Then there is Fortune, with the demon of money and greed. It seems that Fortune goes far beyond simply being a “money demon” power, although I’d say that is part of it. In a world of corruption, characterized by separations and boundaries, there is inequality. Some have more than others, in all things. Greed represents the striving for more for the self. You could call it selfishness. Greed says that I will take from you. You can tell yourself that it is for altruistic purposes, but if you are clear and honest you will see that the purpose of this altruism is your own pleasure.

Fortune is associated with Fire, an element of motion and catalyzation. Fire compels one into action. Fire brings energy that changes situations. In Lucifer magick, the Demon King of Fire is Shahtan. Although Lucifer magick itself has a strong air of adversarialism to it, Shahtan has felt to me like the adversary within the adversary magick. Note again that this is my perspective.

Lucifer magick often has a freezing quality to it. Some magick works by energizing what you want to manifest. Lucifer magick often works by freezing everything else, removing its activity and motion, so that whatever remains flows naturally into manifestation, unhindered by opposing forces as these forces have been rendered inert. I am become Death, destroyer of worlds.

With Enochian, notice that the power of Creation is also associated with Fire. If you want to think of the magick like Prosperity is money angel and Fortune is money demon, you could also think that Creation is manifestation angel and Fortune is manifestation demon.

But what’s the point of having a “manifestation spirit?” Would it be better to have a spirit with a specific power, like a money spirit? I think this can partially be answered by looking at the other labels for the angels in the power of Creation. These angels have been described as angels of creation, but also angels of mechanical arts, or just angels of arts.

It seems you can think of these angels as representing the motion of the mechanical universe. There are things like laws of physics which describe how certain things happen. There are also things like economic “laws”, which also describe how certain things happen. The universe is a place of cause and effect. This applies as much to apples and trees as it does to humans, individually and in groups. Few can see beyond these natural tendencies, but I would say none are unaffected by them. You can fool yourself into believing otherwise if you want. This is not what I do, but you do you.

Interestingly, angels of arts also seems to be a fitting description in a different way. I’d say it’s related, but working on a different level. It’s like adjusting a camera lens. The angels of arts seem to be the ones to call on when you want to improve skills, and also when you want creativity. This is a bit “zoomed out.” Or is it zoomed in?

Ok you probably already knew all of that. This one’s kinda more for newbies anyways. Now I’ll give some more practical ideas and then peace out.

This is perhaps just beating a dead horse, but the more general your requests, the more likely the ritual is to work how you want it to. A Prosperity ritual that goes like “Money came to me easily” is more likely to work than “My boss gave me a massive bonus,” unless you already expect to get a bonus. Now that I have that written there, I can see how both of these could work or fail equally, though. With the first you could get in your own way and freak yourself out about money, and with the second, maybe the best way for you to get money is to get a different job, or a different boss, or maybe your job just doesn’t ever give bonuses (cause it sucks). Even after saying that though I still feel inclined to believe that these would work.

That may be because I’ve learned how to ask for things. Do a corruption ritual for “Everyone but me died instantaneously” and I’m guessing you won’t be that impressed, but I see this all the damn time. People go for the most out-there, absurd results, and not only that, they say it has to happen right the fuck now. They also tend to be absurdly stubborn and believe that using magick or even just ideas from other people is somehow a bad thing. Life tends to not go well for these people, and no wonder. They cannot appreciate the artistry and knowledge that goes into crafting highly effective magick, and so they’ll spend their lives in their own little bubbles, making the rest of us look bad.

If you want magick to work most effectively, in my experience it is wise to ask for what you want. If you want to own a space mega-yacht mansion with a pool and a balcony, then ask for that, but unless that sounds like something you could go out and buy without trouble, don’t expect it to come today. What magick will do, if you let it, is guide you towards that result over time. So maybe a less ridiculous (is it, though?) example would be financial freedom, or maybe your dream job, or something like that.

If you make it clear in your magick that these things are your priority, then you will start to be pulled towards these things. A good example of this is the Omnipotence Transformation in Wealth Magick. This is one of the most effective rituals I have performed. Its potency is more in what it stops from happening.

If you do magick like this, then it is quite likely that you will do rituals that “fail.” This isn’t just about money either, it can be for your love life, finding a soulmate, any long-term goal that will have one of the most significant impacts on your life.

I still do magick for specific things, but the point of all this is to convey that if you want the best long-term results, I think the thing to do is to specify broad situations in your life, like your money, or your social or professional or art life, and then do rituals with the various Universal Powers to allow the spirits to do their thing within that situation. This is also why I put “wonderful” before like everything in my sex magick. It creates the feeling that I want for a situation without specifying the details or exactly what will happen.

That is what matters, I think - the feeling. You could do a Belonging ritual to try and get with someone, but if that would leave you with not a good feeling about your sex life, then you should thank magick when the person ends up out of your life rather than in it. I’m not saying to never do rituals like this, but to be open to the possibilities, and to reflect that attitude in your request.

With this magick in particular, I think it also helps to choose words that will not seem blatantly false if certain things happen. If you do a Protection ritual for your finances, and then the stock market dips for a bit, are you gonna freak yourself out because you did a ritual like “My money always went up”? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe you’ll realize that short-term dips tend to go back up, and so this phrase will give you comfort and assurance. Something like “I never lost money” would probably be less effective. Everyone loses money at some point or another, but does that loss actually matter, like at all? That’s where the magick comes in.

One last thing for today. A few weeks or so back I had a dream where there were some numbers that stood out to me for some reason. I googled the numbers after recording the dream, and the first result was for a legal “clean energy” document of some sort. Clean energy is certainly how I would describe this magick. I haven’t felt anything else quite like it.

Ok take it easy.

I never do rituals unless I get a general synopsis on what it’s supposed to do lol

That’s like taking a gun not knowing wether it’s a toy or real and still playing with it anyway lol

But I understand what you’re trying to say

Well the magick seems pretty real to me. I haven’t seen any reports from people who have worked with the Loagaeth tables in ritual magick, so that was me exploring the magick. I’m guessing some people have done it, using some method or another. People seem to enjoy treating the tables like cryptography, but that doesn’t really interest me. I am more interested in magickal experience. I’m guessing anyone who’d bother with the tables is likely experienced enough to handle themselves. That, or the magick will keep them away from actually using it so they don’t get their brains blasted out and go insane due to their lack of awareness and preparatory experience. It can be very unnerving when you start to experience the sort of spiritual contact this magick can enable. I only dipped my toes in to see what was what, and just that was intense, and that’s coming from someone who’s seen some shit when it comes to magick.

On that note, if you can’t see at least a bit what the Ritual of the Neutron Star is designed to do, then it’s probably best that you keep away from it. This is relatively untested magick, but it seems others have found it to be of good construction, and I was very careful to ensure that the magick is balanced and with safe-guards to protect against potential side-effects. If you cut out the corruption, you’ll end up full of delusion and with an inflated ego. Cut out the other side and you’ll live in negative emotion and destroy everything around you and yourself. Cut out the bits towards the end and you strip the magick of the connection to the fundamental underlying power. The magick is far more potent than I initially imagined while I was receiving and developing it, but this potency manifests more in mundane experiences than in spiritual visions or mystical revelations. This makes it sometimes intense in a different way. If you do perform the magick, I don’t think you’ll be given anything you can’t handle, but I would be cautious about handing this ritual to a complete newbie, or really anyone who hasn’t experienced highly potent magick. I’m not concerned because it asks you to involve yourself with the extremes of emotional energy or advanced visualization. I’m concerned because it makes things happen, and reasonably quickly at that. Not everyone responds well when magick actually starts doing things and making radical changes.

I think I’m starting to appreciate more what “not as gentle as that book” means. I’ve summoned demons and felt their tangible presence within my mind and in my body, and I have sensed them speaking to me. I’ve received paragraphs from angels that were beyond anything I could have imagined or came up with at that time.

When I write here, I consider a relatively wide range of readers. There are probably those who think this is all a shitshow of crazy people and pompousness. There are those who are attracted to magick, but are still at that “manifestor” stage. Then there are those who have gotten themselves awakened to greater extents. With these people you don’t have to try and pull out that wild story about how magick manifested something absurd immediately. They just know and you don’t have to deal with it.

Here I am speaking mostly to the third group, which if I may be so bold I consider myself to belong to. There is something very uncanny and jarring when an Enochian God-being speaks to you directly in a dream. The classic angels and demons are not what popular religion makes them out to be, but when you experience them, it’s not that out there of an experience, at least for me it wasn’t. It was still pretty out there, but afterwards it makes sense in a way. Angels aren’t always fluffy bunnies, but they match a lot of the cultural imagery and language that gets passed down through religious traditions. They feel old, but in a biblical sort of way, even when they appear in forms that differ quite a bit from traditional descriptions.

Enochian spirits just talk to you like some fucking dude on the street. Normal-ass voice, not some pseudo-archaic language. Normal English (my native language), and plainly spelled out messages, be them in images or words. I’ve seen and experienced things which I cannot deny, but in some ways it seems easier to initially deny Enochian experiences because of how strangely frank and plain they can be. If shadowy figures start appearing, and snakes and apples start showing up, and you get that demon stride, this all feels pretty demonic. A voice in your mind that sounds a lot like your normal thoughts but that says something very useful and out of your ordinary, expected experience, that doesn’t feel like a spooky demon, but that’s what it is.

It’s like the angels and demons and God evolved past all the trappings of religion and robed ceremony and grand revelation and just started giving it to us straight. Fuck is it weird.

In the dream, one of these (the?) Enochian God-being took over one of the dream characters after I saw what I needed to see. The being then said something about a third form (out of four I think), and everything blacked out, and I felt this pulsating agony coursing through my body. My thoughts were something along the lines of “fuck you, I can take it.” It was strange because I could sense the agony in the experience, but after the initial shock I wasn’t feeling it directly. I could certainly feel it, but it didn’t really hurt. The spirit then said something about how it does this to people on occasion and then asks for 10% more of their brain power, which they tend to give. I can’t say I’m surprised. The brain power bit wasn’t exactly literal, it seems, but I think I got the point. This was after the Power visualization. At the end of this particular dream (the scene shifted after that) I pressed the pause button on my watch and got some interesting ideas. I was kind of lucid, kind of thought it was the waking state. You’d think this sort of encounter would trigger lucidity immediately, but I suppose that is the capacity of the mind to delude itself.

You know, I could think that way, but that way sounds better.

I haven’t talked about finance in a while so I suppose I’ll do some of that.

At this point it somewhat amuses me that I have basically the exact same conversation over and over again with people. I don’t think I’ve seen people victim-mindset themselves as much with anything as with money. I would at least think that magick people would be more open to the possibility of manifesting financial growth in their life.

It wouldn’t be a magick post without a metaphor (simile, whatever), so here we go. Whenever you pull up the GPS map to navigate to a destination, what do you do? I’m gonna guess that you probably pick the fastest option by far most of the time, and if you don’t it’s because the other option is more convenient in some way.

When it comes to money, most people don’t even open the map. They stay right where they are and don’t even try to move, at all. And then they complain when their circumstances stay exactly the same. And then they project all their bullshit onto you when you point out the specific, concrete, very doable actions they can take to begin their financial ascent.

You are not going to get rich by trying to make everyone financially equal. You don’t have to be a thug, but without at least a little greed, you may as well give up. The world is a place of competition, whether you like it or not. Those, such as myself, who are willing to compete and are willing to play to win tend to be the ones who find a way to improve their financial conditions. Gee, I wonder why they call investors sharks? At least that’s what they call the good ones.

It amuses me how even people who scraped together the courage to summon some demons have these sorts of emotional problems. The fuck are you gonna do, lead the glorious rebellion, spearhead the revolution against the coalition of evil capitalists (so like every person/organization with significant power in the world)? How you gonna pay for all those guns? How about the people? See what I’m getting at here?

You don’t have to be a backroom backstabber to move up in the world. Take a look around you and have a think about what you see.

Honestly I’m so used to having this conversation with ordinary people because the 7 Occult Money Rituals make you just ooze prosperity energy, and I enjoy talking about my passions, so when I write about it or talk about it with magick people, I have to remember that I am habituated to expect the emotional responses from these ordinary people. For the most part these are the same, but there does tend to be a handful that senses the potential of money magick and is willing to make it a part of their life.

This is a question I asked myself, and it is a question I suggest you consider. What are you trying to do? What is your primary life objective? Mine is freedom maximization. Given this, what is your current life objective?

If the answer is to get your money sorted out so you can live the rest of your life without having to put excessive amounts of your time towards bringing in dollars (or whatever currencies you use), then does it not behoove you to create a path that is maximally effective at making you money?

This is what I’ve been doing. As I’ve said before, I do money magick most every day, and I have been doing long-term wealth magick for a number of years. I let go of paths that could make me a bit of money, but that would have left me bound to them for many years because of how much money I’d be making, even under better than average circumstances. And so I found my way into where I am now.

I consider myself to be an artist first, and this is where I want to spend a great deal of my time, but unless you already have built an exceptionally commercially successful career, it’s not exactly the best way to bring in dollars and cents. This is why I dedicated myself to learning business and finance. These tend to be better ways to make money.

But life’s not all about money. Yes indeed this is true, but money is a big part of life, especially if you don’t have much of it. At a certain point, with enough money, you don’t really have to do much of anything and you’ll pretty much be making money automatically all the time. Some people learn of this fact and then begin fantasizing about cocktails in the beach hammock, spending their days doing absolutely nothing. A bit of beach cocktailing never killed anyone, but I haven’t been doing this to make that my life. I’ve been doing it to unlock the life that I actually want.

If you follow a similar path, you will find that you relate less and less to the experience of many people, and more and more to the experience of other people, as money magick works to re-shape your life. Again, I don’t really have this problem, but that makes some people uncomfortable, especially if the ones they are relating less to are friends and family. Ever had that awkward moment when you want to do something, and you invite a friend, and they can’t do it because they can’t afford it? I’ve been on both sides of that, with both relatively small and surprisingly large gaps. If I had to pick one way to lean over the other, I’d rather have to sit a few out and find something else to do while still keeping that relationship.

Money magick is about more than just manifesting random side-jobs that bring in a spot of cash. This is what money magick is to some people, and I congratulate them on their successful manifestation, as many people can’t believe that even this is possible, but money magick can be so much more. Money seeps into every aspect of material existence. Your friends, the people in your profession/industry, the places you go, the things you buy, how you spend your time, all of these things are colored by your finances. Do you have cheap pencils they give to 5 year olds, or do you have high-quality materials that can be used to create what you want to see on the page of your life?

I suppose you can do the magick and join me for some beach cocktails, or you can bring me the drink.

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I’ve been thinking a bit about what to do with the rituals of the Aethyrs, and last night I came up with this structure. You follow this pattern depending on which element the ritual is associated with. This is not the only way to do it, other ways also work, bla bla bla, ok.

The [demonic power] is whichever power is appropriate for that ritual (continuing on with the Greed/Corruption/Decay was good, gave me control/pleasure/wealth pattern, which I believe fills all 49 rituals).

East - Creation, Corruption, Healing, Decay, Fortune, [demonic power], Fortune
West - Protection, Corruption, Decay, Fortune, [demonic power], Corruption
South - Truth, Corruption, Prosperity, Decay, Fortune, [demonic power], Decay
North - Belonging, Corruption, Transformation, Decay, [demonic power], Fortune

These are the patterns for when you do a ritual with a new Aethyr. The “consolidation weeks” (when you go back and repeat a week) may be similar to how I’m doing them now. In case you missed it, I like the pattern - Protection, Corruption, [angelic support power], Decay, Prosperity, Fortune, with each ritual being centered around the same situation. I also have planned out which situations I think I’ll do for the rituals in the upcoming weeks, taking into consideration the element associated with each ritual. Remember to interleave and not give in to desperate haste.

For the rituals with each new Aethyr, I think I’ll probably do something similar to what I’m doing now with the rituals of the angels - come up with phrases for each ritual that relate to the power of the Aethyr. I had been thinking of doing this in a similar pattern to the rituals of the angels, so three angel powers then the cycle of demonic powers, but then this idea came to me.

It will be a while before I get to the Aethyrs, but I’ve found that spending a bit of time contemplating the magick can bring some assurance and confidence in how you have chosen to proceed. These elemental groupings of rituals are also quite interesting, and I can already see how these groupings can have insightful qualities. I wouldn’t have expected the magick of Heavens to involve so many demonic summonings, but I’m certainly not complaining.

This magick feels a lot different than the magick that I’ve done before, even the more mystical magick. I’m used to doing rituals and seeing things happen like the book says they will. That’s been happening with this magick, but it’s not the same feel that a lot of other magick has. My attitude that I like to cultivate with this is to treat the magick like a super long-term thing that may or may not do anything of note anytime soon.

I’ve said it before, and I’m guessing others have too. It’s like planting seeds. I don’t expect the seed to become a tree right away. That’s ridiculous. But interesting things tend to happen when you’re planting these particular seeds. And when you come back later, there’s a forest.

There are things that I have known to be true about myself and what I want to do in my life, and sometimes these things end up in the back of my mind without too much attention being paid to them, for whatever reason. These things aren’t usually so much the day-to-day of what I can be doing now, but larger possibilities which I want to manifest. I feel like this magick has been showing these things to me and saying, “Yeah, not actually that out there or difficult.”

I’ve been in Enochian for long enough now that it has warranted some reflection. There’s been all this stuff happening in my mind, keeping me occupied, that I haven’t always noticed the more subtle changes that have been occurring. It feels like fear has less and less of a grip on me, regardless of what it’s about. There has been a growing belief that regardless of what happens, I will be able to find my way into the life that I want.

There have been times when I was hyper-self-critical in the name of improvement and achievement. The problem with this is that it kind of works. I excelled in certain ways, but at the expense of my overall well-being. As it turns out, you don’t have to hate yourself to improve or make significant achievements. Some of this was my own issue, and some of this came from outside pressures. An overbearing sense of judgement and harsh cruelty doesn’t tend to create a very good learning environment, but I’ve seen people do this to themselves my whole life.

Whenever I do the things that I want to do now and am engaged in learning, I usually just enjoy the activity. If you aren’t making mistakes, then you are almost certainly not being challenged enough for real learning to happen, so how are you going to respond when you make an error? Bringing intense, hateful judgement on yourself doesn’t really do you much good. I’m better at this with some things than others, but I usually find some pleasure in the moment and enjoy analyzing the mistake as part of the learning process.

But what if you aren’t the problem, and it is some ignorant dipshit who is projecting intense, hateful judgement upon you for not being literally perfect all the time? Those people, to me, are to be controlled. Why would I let them do whatever their random collection of life experiences and somewhat in-built habitual tendencies compels them to do when I could instead consciously, intentionally introduce inputs into them to influence their behavior in such a way that they fuck off? Do you let random rabid dogs in the street bite you? Do you get spooked as their owners sit all smugly on their doorstep, or do you not let that get in the way of your experience?

People have such little power in their lives that they cling onto situations like that where they get to feel strong and in control. When you carry yourself through life with calmness and dignity, it can be off-putting when you encounter people like this who have to resort to petty little jabs and inconsequential, pointless, stupid little games. Being exposed to their tiny, constricted world can make you realize how your world has been expanding, not contracting.

Sometimes though you do have to deal with these people, and you don’t want to get infected by all their bullshit nonsense. It may be somewhat challenging to imagine, as even if you have had the experiences that arise from having large amounts of hatred within yourself, that doesn’t mean that you experienced the same thing as these people. When you know malice, and when you have seen just how significant of an emotion that can be, it can be surprising to see it manifest in such insignificant, meaningless, petty behaviors that really do nothing. Because they do nothing, the hatred is never relieved, and they devolve into this cycle of constriction as their petty, stupid, pointless little games become their entire world, even as the people they have convinced themselves they are playing against have little room in their own worlds for this imbecile.

When you have to deal with people like this, it should quickly become apparent to you how at ease you are with controlling human beings.

Some more finance talk today that should be relevant to everyone with psychological bits sprinkled throughout.

I recently had the pleasure of speaking to a complete jackass. We were at a social gathering that attracts a very diverse range of people. At this point I don’t really think about it, my training just kicks in and I start conversing and trying to get to know the people around me. I was also casting my nets for a few different types of people. Networking is like pokemon. There are various types out there, and if you want to succeed, gotta catch the ones that are relevant to your strategy.

The jackass was the one directly across from me, so in the socially easiest position to socialize with me. I learned he was fresh out of med school. I noticed that the sentence he spoke which revealed this to me had an emotional charge to it that was mostly pleasure, but with a slight tinge of hatred. The overall flavor was condescension, and the kind where he expected the other person to submit to his superiority. If you were particularly observant, you may have noticed me internally “rolling my eyes.” This did not show in my words, but the thoughts did arise, and the emotional charge that arises with the thoughts can be seen in subtle non-verbal behaviors. I think it’s actually easier to detect the emotional energy directly, but the behaviors are there.

We continued chatting, with me asking about his specialty, and eventually I said something like, “They pay you now, right?” in a jovial tone. His reply was something like, “Not much, but I’ll get a lot eventually.” Here again the tone was a mixture of pleasure and hatred, although this sentence carried significantly more hatred to it, but I would say the flavor was still general condescension. This was after me mentioning my financial work, so I’m guessing this wasn’t a behavior that I spurred on with my special unique self, but was a behavior that he would have exhibited towards pretty much anyone around our age outside of his medical school bubble.

At this point my training kicked in once again and I began to shill myself, albeit not with full seriousness like I would around actual money-havers. In a bit of a “slicked-back” tone, as somewhat subconsciously I was picking up the hate he was throwing at me, I said, well, if you ever want to make that money of yours bigger, I can absolutely do that for you. I had already mentioned my investment interests previously. The funny part was when he said, “Who do you work for?” and I said, “Oh, it’s my business.”

The training was fully active at this point, and so I started to briefly describe my investment strategy, and it went more or less like this.

“So traditionally you take out the mortgage when you buy, but if you pay cash-up front then that lets you”

“YEAH well that only works if the market’s right.”

What? Well I guess if the numbers don’t work then sure but

“YEAH and then what if the market crashes”

So that’s actually one of the advantages of this strategy, you don’t care if the value goes down because your debt is covered by rental income. If it goes down then you just refinance or whatever so it’s actually a good

“YEAH so what if it doesn’t get rented out”

Well I have risk management systems, which are

“YEAH haha just buy bitcoin am I right HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHAHHAH I sold at $20k”

Like jesus christ dear readers, what a fucking jackass. Fun facts - medical doctors rank among the highest in terms of people who receive incomes above $100k but don’t really end up with much wealth because they’re too busy trying to financially flex on each other. You wanna know how I financially flex on people? I don’t. I like it when people perceive me as rich, but that’s usually because I like to buy items of high quality that last a very long time, and also because I like to talk about investments, especially when people are telling me they’re getting 2% mortgages and a new property goes on sale right fucking next to me like every week. Hot damn is it a bloodbath out there.

Here’s a piece of economics for you - supply and demand. When supply is high and demand is low, price decreases cause people want to sell but no one wants to buy. When supply is low and demand is high, price increases because few people have the thing and lots of people are knocking on their doors looking to buy. Not too complicated, yeah?

I don’t normally like to do this, but if you’re gonna talk about finance and act like you know what you’re talking about, I’m gonna ask the question.

“Yah see sonny boy, I’ve been doing this for 40 years, I’ve got an eye for the market.” rubs belly “Yep, with my experience, I know which ones are the good ones that sell. HaHaHa” smacks belly

What? No you don’t you fucking dipshit. You’ve been doing this for how long? How much are you worth?

Again, not a question I normally ask, but if we’re gonna talk finance, I’m not going to make you feel good for the sake of massaging your dipshit ego. I realize that not everyone is into money as much as I am, but if you claim to take the mundane money magick that is investing seriously, I am going to judge your performance.

Let me tell you a little secret, dear readers. Unless you really go out of your way to surround yourself with very specific people, pretty much everyone you meet will be a financial moron. Some of those financial morons will have such disgustingly hyperinflated egos (or at least a baseless, arbitrary sense of superiority to certain people) that they truly, genuinely believe that they have any shred of a clue what they are talking about. It would be astounding if it weren’t very understandable.

Let me tell you another little secret, this one probably a bit more uncomfortable. It is possible to increase your income and increase your wealth. What’s so uncomfortable about that? Most people are too locked into their hateful, closed mindset to see the potential opportunities they could take action on to achieve financial growth.

Did you know, with your great and powerful psychic abilities which can read my mind instantaneously without you having ever seen me, that I used to kinda be the jackass? I used to hate on finance and business people cause my head was shoved so far up my liberal arts ass. Eventually, with some potent money magick, I got the fuck over this and proverbially switched sides. I’m not talking politically, I’m talking jackass financial morons and learned, financially wise individuals. I’m not wise all the time, but I’m usually wise enough to know when I should shut the fuck up and listen to the person who’s fucking loaded.

When it comes to magick, I tend to push the experience as far as it’ll go. I also have tended to doubt that anything beyond self-deception is happening.

Enochian magick has been an interesting experience. I have probably experienced far more strange things with these methods than anything else, but that could also partially be allowed by my cumulative experience with magick and spiritual practices, like meditation.

I’m putting this out there because you don’t see this sort of thing openly discussed very often.

If I were to label a theme for my practice over the past four or five months, it would be the push and pull between acknowledging supernatural experience and acknowledging the mundane psychological processes that give rise to the perception of supernatural experiences.

I have come to more greatly appreciate the ability of the mind to construct experience.

There doesn’t seem to be any difference between the emotions that compel social behaviors and the emotions that compel, for example, self-preservation behaviors. Fear is fear, love is love, etc.

I am of the belief that humans engage in social behaviors for the purpose of experiencing pleasures of various sorts, and also displeasures of various sorts, as all emotions tend towards self-reinforcement. Buddhists call it karma, psychologists call it activation of cognitive structures. Same thing, more or less.

These would be the same reasons people do anything - emotional compulsions.

If you cultivate mindfulness, rigpa, awareness, non-duality, that stuff, eventually you realize that what you experience is just sensory phenomenon. On top of the raw sense data you put all this stuff. A human figure is a collection of lines and colors arranged in a general pattern that frequently occurs. These lines and colors are also associated with various sounds and other sense data.

This is the same whether you are in the waking state or the dream state.

The tendency to fabricate (there I said it) additional things on top of raw sense experience is presumably helpful for getting laid and not dying. If you take a look at this construction of experience on top of raw sensory information, you probably come to realize that it is exceptionally powerful and more far-reaching than you initially suspect.

Maybe this has just been my experience, but these ideas seem to sink in much deeper after you have more significantly let go of the idea of being a self that is inherent to your being and not constructed by experience. The illusion of self, imo, largely arises from the content of thoughts. Thoughts are themselves sensory experiences which extremely rapidly have semantics (meaning) constructed on top of them. ‘I’ is just a line associated with a sound and also meanings, ideas, or concepts. These constructions or fabrications are so potent that they are able to relate to each other in non-random patterns which give rise to, like, society.

I have been generally aware of these things as intellectual concepts I studied in school for a number of years at this point, but things change when you apply practices that have “theoretical” roots in these ideas. I suppose that goes to show the power of these fabrications, that they fabricate themselves.

Then you have magickal experience. What does it mean that your experience is catered to your needs? What does it mean that experience in the waking state is localized? What does it mean that your experience in the dream state is localized in a less non-fluid way? Why do I have to refer to “your” experience if we already realize that self-concepts are constructed on top of raw sensory experience?

What does it mean that behaviors arise in other people which relate to you in subtle ways that prove themselves to be useful and accurately predictive, despite their unawareness of this? Why does it at times feel as though the activation of cognitive structures spreads out beyond the internal mind into immediate external manifestations? Why is the music at the grocery store always on point? What does it mean that multiple people engage in the practice of magick and subsequently have such magickal experiences?

What does it mean that if you do not do magick, then magickal things do not happen? What does it mean that the concept of prosperity has been present in magick, as far as I am aware, from the beginning?

What am I saying dear readers, magick isn’t real! I’m just a schizophrenic mad-gender-neutral-individual! I’ll go ahead and pop this eye out, make the lobotomy easier for yah. You can put it in your Nobel Prize.

Yep, not real, sure doesn’t work, nope nope. Why would I meditate when I can feed the pharma shareholders their dividends and the dr.'s their boats while life stays shitty. Come on, even weirdly consistent self-hypnosis is better than that.

Yeah yeah it’s all power games and meeting quotas, I’m not a dumbass.

I realize it is perhaps strange to discuss concepts like the illusory nature of the self on a left hand path forum, so perhaps some further elaboration would be useful, for me and you.

For those who may not be aware of this, I’ll go ahead and put here what I have posted before on this forum. I received the following paragraph from the 26th shem angel Haaiah, who is said to grant the power to obtain wealth through knowledge. This was during a period of time in which I was largely reclused from society and focused on magick. This is only a small piece of what I received, but it is one of the more relevant pieces of text. Frankly most of it was close to mind noise, albeit mind noise that helped unravel the mind noise, but I do not think that I can say that any of it was made up by me.

“Think of the universe like a box. You can put things in and take things out, but the box always remains. You are the box, though you cannot be destroyed. You are also that which puts into and takes out of the box. There are other boxes near you, and sometimes your contents are also put into theirs, and what is taken out of yours is also removed from the boxes near you. You are the only true box within yourself. Only you hold up the foundations that create your reality. All things exist inside of you, yet there are many more boxes within. These boxes think that they are the one true box, but they are deceived and blinded by their own lack of power. Take pity on them, for they do not realize how truly weak and lacking in majesty that they are.”

My interpretation of this passage has continued to change since I initially received it some years ago. Those familiar with Tibetan Buddhism may see references to the kunzi, the base. I was not familiar with such teachings, and so I arrived at different conclusions.

Those familiar with modern psychological science may see references to schemas (although the idea of schemas isn’t as fashionable as it used to be, in my opinion). A “schema” is essentially a collection of mutual associations. So a bunch of stuff that all point to each other. Or you could say a bunch of things that all have the same sticker, so they know they all belong together. Any individual thing can have many stickers and so belong to many schemas, aka groups of ideas and emotions all “bundled together.” The term “bundled together” is a bit problematic, as any individual idea, for example a word, for example “blue,” simultaneously “exists” in many of these “bundles” or schemas. That’s why I like the sticker analogy more.

Do you understand what I mean when I say that the self-concept, aka the ego, is constructed or fabricated on top of your raw experience? The ego is just one of these schemas. It is an artificial construct that is constantly undergoing change. If you gathered together every single thing that has the “ego” sticker on it, the collection of all those ideas would be the ego.

When I say that the ego is an illusion, I mean that there is no objective reality which states that some particular collection of things or another, which all possess certain qualities or properties, is “ego.” Consider a water bottle. I have one here with me now (a re-usable one, cause I don’t enjoy contributing to the almost inevitable reverse ice age fiery hellscape that is climate change - get me the fuck out of here please, I’m not among the goddamn fucktard dipshits prisoner’s dilemmaing us into oblivion - play your stupid politics in the dream state, like I intend to do). It is a cylinder of plastic with a lid on it that screws and unscrews. What exactly about that makes this a “water bottle?”

I suppose its function kind of makes it a “water bottle,” along with its cylinderyness. Do you see how that is kind of arbitrary?

Now what about people. We have schemas for all the random objects in our life, like tables, chairs, food, trees, clouds, cars, all these things are patterns of associations, collections of things with the “table” sticker, or the “car” sticker. We also have schemas for procedural events. You ever go to a restaurant? You ever notice that you know how to behave in that context? Why is it the case that there are certain ways to behave in some restaurants, and other ways to behave in others? Why can you get piss drunk and shout during The Big Game at a sports bar, but do that at the joint where everyone’s wearing a suit and you get kicked out? How exactly do you “vibe check” the situation?

People, though. Whenever you interact with someone, you never truly “know” them completely, or perhaps even at all. How can you know an amorphous, constantly changing, arguably impossible to define collection of sensory phenomenon that do not arise in your experience?

When you consider an individual, what comes to mind is not the self-concept that exists within their mind (here I am making an assumption that this exists). What comes to mind is the self-concept for that person which you have constructed within your own mind.

Have you ever traveled to some scenic destination, and before your travel, looked up photos of this destination?

Have you ever formed beliefs about an individual you have never seen, met, heard, or otherwise relatively directly sensed in any way, based solely on what other people have told you?

What exactly is different about all these scenarios? Ironic, how the supposed illusion in these situations is the only commonality.

This has all been fairly secular and psychological. So now what happens when you are confronted with the realities of experience that defies everyday logic, experience which breaks statistical probabilities?

If it is true that after death you are reborn into some new life, then I think it is possible, with enough magickal power, to cause someone to not be reborn after they die. Whether that is a curse or a blessing upon them, whatever.

musings for the forum