I wish I could tell you it got easier @Onion I’m needing 12-14 hours of sleep daily now. I know it’s Qlippoth related.
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12th March, 2022
9:06
A weird dream experience
I wanted to write this asap, in case I forget details by my usual time which is after dinner or before it.
I was going out with my friends and we were walking on a street. I suddenly felt my eyes getting pulled, like when you’re sleep deprived pull, and noticed that I was just swaying and walking with my eyes closed. I told my friends to look out for me because I was walking with my eyes closed, I sometimes only opened them to see the ground.
After I said that though, I saw a cinematic vision of sorts, of me standing in between huge screens who showed the surrounding, but in front of me it was still dark.
I was there, I was sensing touch, sound, and wind and stuff like that, except vision. And my body was being run by someone else while I sat as an audience. I have never been possessed, but I thought it’d be something like this.
I felt myself sitting on someone’s lap, curled up like I was sleeping. Whoever it was, was holding my hand. When I moved my hand out, they gently tapped the back of my palm to hold and squeeze my hand again. I then saw a few horse running past us, to the left. I fell asleep again and took back the control of my body, and I found myself wake up at my house.
It was 6:20am ib the house, and I was sleeping in my study room. I woke up there to see that everyone was busy with their chores and my sister had went out.
I had another dream out of this, but I don’t remember the details.
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12th March, 2022
20:11
Samael, Day 4
Today was a pleasant day. The time is nearing for me to move out of this sphere. I have found that whenever I get some sunlight after breakfast, even if it’s for 5 minutes and hot, I don’t get as tired.
I went shopping with my friends today. I bought some earrings, and also got something for my guides:
I finished writing one file today, after dinner I will finish another. Then another tomorrow and finally submit it.
Apart from last nights’s dream there isn’t much. I fell deeply asleep and then woke up in the middle of the night. Exchanged a few words with Lord Belial, and went back to sleep.
Anyways that’s all for this entry. I hope everyone has a good day!
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pins badge to bag thank you ^^💜
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13th March, 2022
23:21
Initiating through the tunnels of Set (Gamaliel and Samael, Samael and Herab Seraphel
Hot, hot, hot. The amount of heat I’ve been feeling from Qliphothic energies makes me feel like I am the furnace. It comes from the inside.Yesterday I felt like my clairvoyance is developing. If I looked at someone I could see what the color of their auras are, but not actually seeing it. I saw their aura white, while I knew the colors. Very odd but cool experience.
Am I pushing by initiating through 2 tunnels at the same time with my viva exam tomorrow? Maybe.
But it’s in the morning, so it’ll be fine. I scanned and uploaded 55 pages twice today, it is fine. It will be fine.
While brushing my teeth today I asked Lord Belial why the Qliphoth has been feeling easy (disregarding the fact that there have been times I felt like I was bordering insanity). It got me a look for sure. But he also said it’s because I’ve done quite a bit of shadow work, so the things I have worked through I’m gonna have an easier time with. For things I didn’t, it’ll be difficult. For example, I had a difficult time in Gamaliel.
I was testing my mic in Ms Teams because it wasn’t working in the previous class, so it wasn’t working at all. Then I talked to a friend aand she recommended installing it on my phone. I almost panicked but after 45 minutes of struggle it worked. I initiated myself into the tunnels after, and will be going to sleep after I post this.
I drew the sigil for the initiation on my hand and my friend said it looked like the dog from Ninja Hattori 
A friend from school pointed out that I’ve always been a little cool and harsh. Like soft but still very harsh, and that I never threw around words carefully. That she was scared of me, and scared of upsetting me. And that she also made sure the people she was close with didn’t upset me.
It felt weird. From 6th-7th grade I was a very violent girl. Like getting into fights violent because I always kept getting harassed by the boys and I had to throw punches else they wouldn’t listen. Trying to push me so I fall on another guy, try to look into what’s in my bag, being called names, trying to provoke me by using another guy’s name till I got irritated and upset. Eventually I decided to slap one, and then I didn’t stop till everyone understood to not try me.
The interesting part? I never got into trouble for it. Never. Not once. I threw punches and grabbed the back of shirts to keep them from moving. The strength I had back then, and the fact that I never got into trouble for it. Maybe it was Lord Belial, maybe he had some part to play in it. In me finally deciding to fight back while also keeping me out of trouble.
I stopped raising my hand after 7th grade, but I still carried that intimidation I guess. I always thought I looked like a softie 
:female_sign: Feels good to know that I can be intimidating ngl.
I will be going home on 18th, and be back on the 21st. My mum wants me to wait till we get an official notice from college, but knowing my department we’ll get it last minute. And I don’t want any of that, and I sure as hell don’t want an extended stay. My friend’s department’s starting day has been told and it’ll be the same for us too.
I’ll be waking up tomorrow because I’m tired of all the writing, scanning and uploading I did. I shall study for the viva tomorrow morning.
I thought a lot about @Kindraathe 's recent jounral entry, about what King Paimon had told him. I had a lot of revelations, half of which I can’t recall rn. But they were good. I have a different perspective to friendships now, but my feelings remain. I have understood, maybe part of what he said. But that has always been the way when it comes to whatever King Paimon had and does tell me, or by me reading what he told someone else.
We are all the same but we’re not. Humans, we’re so fucking complex.
Anyways, I’m utterly confused by my dreams but they have been fun. That’s all for this entry. Good night everyone. I hope everyone has a good day!
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wow the qlippoth is really doing wonders for you. I’m so proud of you. You truly blow me away.
There is a quote that I heard on here that boils down to “being nice because you dont have the power to fight back isnt kindness, its weakness. It’s having the power to fuck someone up and choosing to uplift them is kindness” you are truly kind to me and for that I am grateful from the bottom of my heart.
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Thank you 
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15th March, 2022
23:05
Initiation into Herab Seraphel
Susanne please don’t read my journal before bed.
The 4th sphere, here we go. I was sleepy when I was initiating myself, my throat hurt a bit while vibrating the names because I lowered my pitch more than I could handle. My throat is fine though.
Last night I dreamt that I was sitting in a class of sorts outside in the open. Behind us was a tall building, and you could see a room with tubelights on. It suddenly started thundering and a few lightning strikes went inside the building through a window to hit the tubelight and it caught on fire. Then it started raining and we ran inside the building to take cover.
I was afraid of getting struck by lightning inside Because if it entered the building once it might enter again. There were a few more people, and a girl connected some cords. Then the tubelights turned on again.
In the next dreamscape I was still in the same building in another room, but it looked like my hostel room. My friends were there and I wws curled up on the bed, sleeping. I woke up and grumbled in pain, and my friends told me that they took me to a doctor and gave me my medicines, so I should be fine and to get some rest.
I looked down and saw stitches where an incision was made, on my lower abdomen. Right where an incision is made for a C-section. It looked like it had reopened because of them so I had to get stitches again, as I could still see the blood clots and the scar looked crimson red like dried blood.
I curled up again and went back to sleep. I have no clue on what the dream might be about. The only symbolism I can think of is loss.
I’m still sleepy, but I will invoke Belial after I post this. He has agreed to be my patron.
Good night everyone, I hope you have a good day!
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Yayyy!! Congratulations!
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No bedtime for me, it’s okay 
Maybe it’s about healing, at least for me.
Congrats, I’m so proud of you 
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16th March, 2022
18:58
Herab Seraphel, Day 1
I did dream last night, but I don’t remember what it was. I do know that I did invoke King Belial after posting it (which was right before I slept). It got too hot too quick, I felt my consciousness separate a little almost instantly. I closed my eyes, relaxed while his enn played, and I saw in my mind’s eye his sigil in gold. Behind the sigil, him. Then he turned into golden powder and it got absorbed into me.
I couldn’t handle it for more than 3 minutes. I had overloaded myself too quick. First by being so sleepy that I partially couldn’t comprehend anything. Then by initiating into the next sphere, pushing myself to update the journal and deciding to do an invocation of Lord Belial.
I opened my eyes and stumbled towards my water bottle. I almost fell 
but I was able to balance myself. I fell asleep quite easily though. Sooo that’s a… plus point.
Today was a decent day. I played Chain Reaction and Uno with my friends. Right now though, I’m feeling a little nauseous.
I haven’t had a lot of visions or anything from this sphere, except that I only saw my higher self in a red light.
I did my friend’s nails today and that’s sort of it. I’ve just been relaxing till I have to go home on the 18th. My classes start on 23rd but I’ll be coming back on 21st, I could stay for another day but I don’t want to be there. The last time I worked with Lord Belial I got hit with everyone’s shadow self being projected at me. It was ugly af. With the Qliphoth going on I had to make the decision for my own sake.
I think this song fits Lord Belial really well:
I booked the tickets quite early. Very early.
I have also want to eat a sweet bun
I also think I lost some weight? I’m not too sure. I was asking Lord Belial about how much weight I should lose (to be more fit, not skinny). And he asked me why the first thing that pops up is always how much weight I should lose instead of asking what to do to be stronger.
And it hit me that I kept thinking that I gained a lot of weight in the past years, and that I had equated losing weight as a way for me to get healthier. Welp.
A kite fell in our hostel today, and I had a happy time playing with it. I had washed my hair and went to hang my laundry. The wind was blowing and I decided to dry my hair a little bit standing there. The sun, the wind, I felt very pretty 
Anyways, that’s all for this entry. I have been itching to make some art or craft but I don’t have my colors here :3 I hope everyone has a good day!
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17th March, 2022
22:26
Herab Seraphel, Day 2
Played Holi. Lunch was bad, dinner was good. Extremely sleepy. I don’t remember much, didn’t do much today. I’ll be home tomorrow.
Can’t decide if I should keep the window open while sleeping.
That’s all for this entry, good night everyone.
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18th March, 2022
15:02
Herab Seraphel, Day 3
I forgot to recall what my dreams were, therefore I have forgotten them. Before falling asleep, my hips and lower waist were hurting real bad physically. In my mind’s eye I saw myself on a bed, in red light, curled up and grimacing in pain as I bled. That me was on her period, and it was horrible. I physically am not on my period. I think it was a full moon yesterday? There have been days when my cycle synced up with the moon’s cycle.
The me on the bed kept passing out and waking up in cold sweat. First the stitches in that dream, now this. I was still physically hurting and I asked Michael to help me out. He has helped me with my health before. He passed some energy to me and the pain (the physical one) was gone. I was also able to fall asleep much quicker because of it.
I thought, while falling asleep, that we have ranks because we interact with each other. Like, if I was a soldier and I trained alone, I would think I’m the strongest or stronger than someone else. I wouldn’t know my rank or where I’m at until I spar with someone else. Until I compare my skillset with someone else. Ranks are good as long as they are taken positively.
I’m writing the entry now, because I’ll be home by tonight and I doubt I’ll get the chance to write. I will be asleep by 10pm if not 10:30.
I received a message from Prince Orobas yesterday, through Mike Bee. I was reflecting on it today morning, but it will take me more time to truly understand what the Prince means.
It is getting hot, please stay hydrated everyone. That’s all for this entry, I hope everyone has a good day!
edit: I forgot to add. My exam results came in. I got a GPA of 8.1! I’m very proud of myself for scoring well.
Thank you King Paimon and Lucifer for having my back and helping me study
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This is probably both an initiatic experience, and a sort of spiritual cleansing/purging that’s occuring through the lens of the feminine.
It definitely sounds like you’re purging something.
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Yeah, I need to figure out what exactly I am purging. I sometimes feel like something is quite literally evaporating off of me
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Fuck that’s intense. Are you doing okay?
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I’m 50-50
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