Narcissism and the Ego Self

I am pro Ego now.

I really feel like ranting about what’s been on my mind lately, revelations as I continue to evolve in understanding through LHP ideals. I’ve been thinking about dominant and submissive psychology aspects in relationships. Not sexual, though that is interesting. How we are hardwired through our experiences and inner workings (stars signs/natal chart aspects).

I want to talk about Narcissism too. Below narcissism we have self-esteem and above it we have sociopathy and more serious disorders.

Narcissists are so bloody dangerous. We rarely have the knowledge to protect ourselves from these people until we have an encounter with them. Many people who put out information on Narcissists were manipulated and hurt by them to such a sad degree that they are still in a way obsessed, in a way that Narcissist is still influencing their life. I reckon I was attracting a Narcissist but luckily he caused no direct damage because even though I was obsessed I was too proud to continue pursuing him - I’ll go into my personal situation a bit later.

Psychopaths and sociopaths cause destruction in their own way and they can go to prison. Narcissists fly under the radar because the damage they do isn’t illegal. It can be. But they are causing damage to the psychology of people cause they lack ‘human’ qualities. And the ‘enablers’ who are unguarded and get sucked in so easily are often unaware and can be traumatized for the rest of their lives. There are different emotional motivations to dating apart from falling in love, there are different perspectives and experiences on love and what it is.

At the end of a toxic Narcissist-Enabler relationship the Enabler is shattered while the Narcissist moves on. Some people hold stock in a Narcissist-Empath phenomenon, where many people who are Empaths naturally attract these relationships. It could be that apart from some factors that draw people together (same soul family, same vibrational pattern) there is also the factor that one is emitting too much ‘dark’ energy and one too much ‘light’. And thus the Law of Attraction takes place and balance tries to occur, since we should all be proper mixes of light and dark. Unfortunately for the ‘light’, the more vulnerable of the pair, they can take a lot of damage. If there is a lesson, it may be for the ‘light’ to learn to be darker so they aren’t taken advantage of, and for the ‘dark’ to see goodness being displayed and maybe learn to adopt some of that, or perhaps experience at least some inconveniences to destroying/using another person in such a way (i.e. having too much dark energy).

LHP is dualistic. Dark (ego) trumps light. But too much dark can inhibit us from learning, improving and feeling other forms of pleasure.

In my situation I met someone from my soul family who I’d had a past-life relationship with and developed feelings. I pursued him and he liked that. He is very unhappy with his life and craves control. He’s a Capricorn - I’ll talk about start signs and how they play into this as well. The two of us had synchronicities with our meeting, similar to when I had my first boyfriend, a different soulmate. He happenly worked next to my work and we both only worked three days a week, went to the same school, he was in the same year as my ex. I of course, can sense and understand their issues. The negative issues my soul family shares, that we are learning through, they feel familiar and I can understand them. But my soul family is not evolved/awake like I am and so don’t seem to recognize a special connection at all, even when our similarities happen to be long-listed and staggering.

I believe he wanted to be desired, chased and certainly to have the power in the connection. At the time of us meeting and talking I was also highly delusional. It looks karmic. I believed he must love me and that he would adore and worship me. We both had that trait, so that is a similarity that would attract us together. The difference was I wanted to give and receive that level of love also, but I don’t reckon he would’ve been capable or interested. I was deceived about the truth of our connection for a long time. Luckily he rejected me cause I know it would have been BAD. He is not my usual type but I deluded myself, my spiritual idealism came out, and things snowballed and I got obsessed.

I’ve learned so much from all this and come out unscathed. To some extent we all make the mistake of believing other people are like us. People with good upbringings who want nothing more from relationships than to love and give, can get really hurt when they meet damaged/unhappy/unwell people who aren’t so far along that personality-disorder spectrum to be noticed. Most everyone tries to put their best foot forward, be charming when they want something/someone, and believes that they are ‘a good guy’.

When it comes to star signs some are naturally more dominant than others. Most I would say are neutral. Some are very dominant and even manipulative. The naturally submissive signs in relationships I’d say are Cancer, Virgo, Libra and Pisces.

It’s important to note that the zodiac wheel is a progression, each sign takes everything preceding it and steps into something new. (Aries is the first sign and is all about independence and self, they don’t want to be the best like Leo, they haven’t evolved to that understanding yet, they just want to be independent. Taurus then has an understanding of self and moves to the next thing to learn, the outside, the physical world, specifically the difference in quality of things). Aries and Taurus are direct because they are un-nuanced. Anyone who pays attention to star signs can see how a certain social intelligence is gained as each star sign learns something new through progression.

Libra is the most manipulative sign I reckon. But a Libra’s prerogative is to be liked and they are typically benevolent and fair by nature. Scorpio territory crosses over into darkness and power, and it is the signs after it that aren’t commonly known for being as extremely manipulative as they in fact are. Scorpio has the big reputation, it is all about withholding and secrets, Scorpio is aware that the more you know about others the more power you have over them. Beyond Scorpio this trait continues to be more nuanced.

I believe that Sagittarius and Capricorn are the most dangerous signs because they have this awareness/power from Scorpio and lack a Water sign’s sensitivity. Fire signs all have more will and ego, and Capricorn is very ego-centric as well. For Capricorn, Earth signs aren’t known for being naturally expressive or energetic, but they know how to put on that show because of all the knowledge gleaned from signs before them, they know how to ‘pretend’ whereas direct signs like Taurus honestly don’t in a social setting, they are just themselves and direct. And Capricorn is not manipulating other people to make them happy, like a Libra would, no it’s about their status and ego. Sagittarius are massive players and know how to outthink other people, they have fire competitiveness with the mutable intelligence of Gemini/Virgo/all the others under their belt. Many pop celebrities are Sagittarians, they have a fire sign’s flair with a higher social intelligence. Aquarius is more so focused on being friendly, on humanity and not at all about competition. Pisces are more sensitive. But make no mistake they both can also be dangerous. And this higher-thinking attained by the higher signs can be used in dangerous ways. A narcissist Taurus is not as dangerous as a narcissist Capricorn, because they are more direct and won’t know how to play you as well.

Back to me. Cause I was lonely and other reasons, I once got to a point where I felt I would allow myself to be used completely by this guy cause I wanted love. Thankfully, the self-respect I did have stopped me from messaging him after he turned me down. The strong feelings I have are fading now that I can accept, he isn’t in love with me, despite our connection and what interest he may have initially had. I have taken on board the need to embrace more ‘dark’ energy and have done spells on him for my own sake and healing. Love/attraction spells, but I reckon I’ve also been causing him and his life a bit of emotional turmoil as well.

I just took a dominance-submissive test and a narcissist test. I got 38% on the dominance one. And 26/40 for the narcissist one, which is kinda high. Of the seven factors I scored max on superiority and vanity. A bit over average for authority, exploitativeness and exhibitionism. And fifty-fifty for entitlement and self-sufficiency. I spoiled the crap out of my first boyfriend and I thought it was cause I knew he had anxiety and I really wanted to take care of him. I actually enjoy giving more than receiving, so long as I want to want to do it, so long as I love my partner enough. I had such strong feelings for this potential-narcissist guy that I would’ve been happy to give more than I got, and spoil him, cause that’s in my nature. Maybe bordering into the territory of people who enjoy the slave lifestyle of bdsm as a relationship dynamic.

My own personal dilemma is: should I want a relationship with equal give and take. Is it fulfilling to be with someone who gives much less than you… if you find it fulfilling, or could you feel used/hurt down the line. If he only loves me because I give to him, and fulfill a possibly narcissistic need for devotion… is that okay? Would it make me happy? I have my incubus who surely loves me. So maybe that is enough love and I can enjoy serving something that once excited me so much? I don’t have the same desire for him anymore. And the issue is: would he leave me? Would he give me the adoration I also seek, in terms of adoring me for what I do, if not for who I am. Cause what I’m doing is who I am, and what I want to do. Is this connection sustainable. What am I willing to put up with?

He doesn’t have the power over me that he used to. And I’m not sure how safe it would be for me to consider being with him.

Anyway we all need Ego. That is the main point of this post. We all NEED to be on our own side. If you don’t think that you have a reason to feel superior, at least feel superior because of magic and understanding what many people don’t - the hidden nature of reality. I may have submissive tendencies and want to serve, but I still have Ego. I don’t want to be used just because I enjoy giving, I also want to be adored and needed by the one I serve.

I don’t know who is going to read through all this but was hoping to start a discussion on how people feel about Ego, personal relationships and power-plays.


Same here actually,one of my goal is mass mind controlling,it will take many years though,but it will worth it.


These are not on the same spectrum like this. All sociopaths are narcissists, but not all narcissists are sociopaths.
Those narcissists that are made (by abuse, i.e. not born), have very low self esteem, which is thought to be why they try so hard to control and put others down in relation to them.

Narcissism isn’t a bad thing. Everybody has some level of narcissism at different times, it’s part of the survival instinct. Being diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) means the person is a malignant narcissist, and they exhibit 5 or more traits of narcissism all or most of the time, not just one or two from time to time like everybody else. It’s that extreme of behaviour that makes them predictably dangerous.

Regarding give and take in relationships, you might be interested in the counterpart to narcissism, codependency. Also not a completely healthy approach to relationships, but it can work and I’ve anecdotally heard of narc-codependents being happy. The dom-sub thing is a manifestation of this I suspect, and in a sense is healthier because it’s not imposed blindly, it’s discussed and agreed to clearly and entered into open eyed, stated and defined and willingly. The main issue both these types of people have is in setting healthy boundaries.


Thanks so much! That’s the word I was looking for, codependent. And it was the card that kept constantly popping up in my oracle cards about this guy: codependency. And me being delusional (and narcissistic?) at the time thought it meant he’d be codependent on me. And so I loved him cause I believed I was being told he loved me. Totally crazy. I’ve always been an idealist I suppose.

Maybe that’s what I’m thinking about, a narc-codependent relationship. Though I wanted to have power too, like enough so that this guy wouldn’t drop me. Like, say 30% of the power instead of 0% or something like that? It’s going to take a lot more thinking…

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The narcissism thing seems to be everywhere now, but I really do believe that our society is to blame and people simply have been desensitised to other human beings in general. They see each other like the Facebook friend list because everyone is spending so much time on their phones. We all lack compassion. Just watch a video on animal cruelty and see how quickly you can move on. 10 Years ago, you would have kept discussing the topic for weeks.

I have compared the astrology charts of serial killers and psychopaths.
Scorpio planets popped up everywhere.
I don’t mean the sun sign but several other planets (often Jupiter).
I was dating such a guy and got scared when I saw his chart. There were so many signs that he had psychopathic tendencies, but I did not want to believe it. He was so kind and adoring at the beginning. Later I experienced probably the worst heartbreak since 2007, and I’m still not over it. I still want to believe it could work.

If someone has many planets in Scorpio, they surely have psychopathic tendencies - selfishness,
secrecy, they want to have power and you’re damned if you insult them or criticise them. They are simply cruel. Scorpios are predators. There is this little story of the frog who carries a scorpio over a river, and then gets killed by it.
When it asks the scorpio why it did that, it says: I’m just following my nature"
This is Scorpio.

Capricorn naturally lack empathy. I don’t know why, they just do. Many planets in Capricorn make antisocial misanthrops. Entitled loners who use others for their own benefit.
Aries are highly narcissistic, but in a childish way. By far not as calculating as Scorpios.
Libras care much about their reputation and will discard you if you don’t make them look “chic,”

It’s really the number of planets that a person has in these signs and the story is often far more complex. People who have been severely emotionally bruised, often decide to give a shit and become narcissists. Been there and getting there again.
Hard Saturn aspects can do that and make a person very cold and selfish because they have been bruised too often. They just lose empathy over the years because nothing else seems to work for them.

What I mean is - we call every weirdo a narcissist today. But there is always a combination of different planets and aspects that tells you why and how…and if you could possibly change them.

Oh and hard Pluto aspects are also very dangerous. Often crazy people. Again Scorpio. This sign has caused me the most agony and I hate it today.


Lol as soon as I read the title I thought of Scorpio aswell :joy: my narcissistic ex was one aswell ! Not only him but many people in my family who are with scorpions are in the same situation too :disappointed:


I always hesitated to make this statement, then I found a few posts by different people who claimed the same. And I really mean several planets in Scorpio, not just one or two.
3 is still ok, depends on the rest of the chart. But 4 planets and the AC in SC, like my ex— I should have run from the beginning.
And he had a stellium of Mars/Pluto/Moon/Uranus in Libra/Virgo.

Sun and Mercury in House 12, Venus/Neptune opposite Saturn on AC/DC. (In case it interests anyone)
There really can’t be more signs of a very difficult, dangerous personality.

Several people say that they have been massively emotionally damaged by Scorpios. While you get over other signs more easily, Scorpios know which buttons to push and seem so deep, intelligent and can pretend to be romantic ---- it takes years to get over them.


Should be noted this doesn’t always apply. A little level of development and it becomes easy to negate the effects of planetary and zodiac forces if you wish to do so. Even on level of more active things like retrogrades can be shrugged off with little difficulty. What these do is set the base line influences but they do not dictate anything, only give an influence that can be changed. A large part of how the influence affects people tends to fall into the realm of thoughtforms and stereotypes after a while. Many stereotypes do develop a living state and some won’t even take effect until the condition is percieved and thus giving it a place to take root.


I completely agree, it depends on the personal soul development. However, the development also allows you to have certain astrological constellations in the sky - and the specific soul energy.
It also depends on the synastry how someone will treat you. You can have wonderful compatibility with a serial killer, and while he might kill everyone else…he loves you and keeps you alive.
That doesn’t mean he is not a serial killer…lol.

There is a lot more to a chart of a real psychopath than scorpio planets. Usually the planets and significators need massive hard aspects like in Charles Manson’s chart.
Or Peter Scully who has Mars/Pluto/Uranus/Moon opposite Chiron (Just like my fucking ex).
It can mean that his dick is too small (Mars-Chiron) and he has a huge complex doing it with women…but his sex drive is fucking insane and he hates normal stuff(Mars/Uranus/Pluto)

But aspects realise themselves in one way or another. If you are not the abuser, you will be abused.


Once again not always. If you take control of that energy you can be aware of it and block the negative effects even cancel out any attractions to abusers it might bring by changing your own field to repel them or otherwise react in a different fashion. I find much of the astrology especially in the modern day is seriously overblown in how big an impact it is percieved to have. Many ancient traditions taught as among the basics the skills needed to negate these influences on the self usually starting directly eh controlling and guiding your own mind independent to external influences and moving on to balancing out internal energies leading the aura to change in response. With some people this comes naturally even. The largest obstacle comes down more to getting someone to put the time and effort into these base practices. Most of the time this work in various forms was required to be mastered before one would be allowed to progress at all and many of these practices were given to the general public albeit in diluted form.

People have become so disconnected from the truth of everything that even stray thoughts can have a terrible impact on some people even when they can so easily learn to block it. It is not perfect some will hunt you down regardless to the balancing of your own energy but you won’t attract them as much. Further changes will leave them actively repelled or yourself sensitive enough to read their energy regardless of their charts.

Sorry I just have a big beef with how astrology is commonly regarded and things in it seen as inevitable or unavoidable in some form when that just simply isn’t the case if time and care is taken to balance this stuff out.


I don’t think they can control it. Narcissism functions more like a survival mechanism for those who suffered deep trauma; usually due to poor or absent parents.

Whether you can pinpoint the kind of person who is likely to be a narc based off their chart is a toss up. Upbringing and family history plays a stronger role in determining so.


I agree and think narcissism can be a self-protective mechanism.
There are, however, and i hate to say it, people who simply lack empathy for others and enjoy to abuse.
Maybe they have been abused themselves as children, but not everyone becomes a psychopath or narcissist. An abused Pisces personality will start to save others and become very compassionate, a Scorpio personality will go after power and aim to control others. Therefore, the main soul purpose can be defined by the significant sign in a chart.

We all experience trauma in many ways, but we transform it very differently. Many people today seem to go the narcissist route because of the role models they follow in the media


I wanted to add how trauma might influence different signs (always think 3 planets +)

Aries - Show - offs, need to prove their value with possessions, can’t accept other opinions, always need the last word, extremely childish in arguments, they actually need arguing to feel better. They damage other’s self esteem.

Taurus: Focus on possessions and wealth

Gemini: Study many books and become very articulate to prove their superiority.
Will always talk more than anyone. When they talk, they exist MORE.
Will sound pseudo-intellectual with words nobody understands

Cancer: Become victims and cry babys

Leo: Become massive show-offs and need to be famous, the most popular. Get a huge existencial crisis if they don’t have enough likes on Social Media. They become celebrities

Virgo: Becomes perfectionist

Libra: Has always to be with the in-crowd (I am better than YOU)

Scorpio : Become manipulative controlling psychopaths, they cry, but you are weak if you cry.

Sag: They become overly happy, always going to the latest bars, places…always on the run but avoid depth.

Capric: become loners

Aqua: become crazy and delusional. Live in their own world

Pisces: Become Mother Theresa


A valuable discussion something that am not i can devulge of my past traumas but have learned to release. Ego though. Yes it feels likend unto thy own Will.

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@ysy true narcissist cause a person to develop a form of narsasistic tendencies weather to be so in their presence in order to protect themselves or complete crumble unti they learn to wall up and they hammer at your walls trying to get at your soul whi you’ve carefully constructed. Have experienced narcissistic such relationships. Nothing good comes from narc-codepend itd more damaging then us c realistic. Narcs do not love they cannot. Fuck i lost my oldest two children now 19 & 20 & a 1/2. They ate brain washed and now I quit.
Narsasistic relationships are destructive because they cannot love beyond the level of a six year old.
The astrological signs do not determin a narc (neither is a Gemini a two faced fake), the signs and personal characteristics have potential to be at their best mental space or worse mental spaces, but is not actually the star sign in itself yhat will cause / display this trait. I have met Aries who are completely fuck heads and the same Aries as in control of themselves not seeking to dominate other personalities because they are in a good space mentally and turn out to be wonderful kind allies.
There is something that helps with understanding people that can give certain indications of their qualites and that is palmistry add in face mapping withe involvement of a discipline from not just modern western style of reading. It can be useful indicator sometimes warning signs


@ysy i disagree with you on many levrls here. As a Gemini for example i don’t talk to exist i have and can specialise. Alot of “experts” mis understand the relevance of astrology
I short i think your way off your mark

I talk about a person who has several planets in a sign, not a star sign only.

I also mention how aspects and specific planetary combinations make psychopaths - I rarely use narcissist, bc it’s an overused new term that I do not really support. Our society is narcissistic- so we all are and can’t judge ourselves any ore. I would rather say emotionally unstable person. Often people confuse narcissists with Psychopaths. Please read again, I stated clearly that a sign does not define a real psychopath.

But a combination of several things can give a predisposition


I got into a relationshit with a borderline, and right after that a narc/bpd hybrid. The pain was distinctly different between the two bitches, and believe me it was painful as fuck. But the thing is, I managed to transmute the pain and now I have the ability to manipulate people, read and mirror them effectively, and shut off my empathy as and when I need to.

I don’t have the compulsive need to be liked though. That’s the trick: to transmute the useful parts of the pain and avoid being sucked in to the negative parts. As above so below, so if you meet a manipulative bitch/bastard, I recommend you look at it as an invitation to visit those aspects of yourself and make peace with them.

Once you accept that manipulation, mirroring, gaslighting, cold-hearted discards etc are just aspects of yourself you don’t fear those things anymore, and they become part of your arsenal in future adventures. But the narc/borderline usually has no choice in the matter, they ARE those things and they can’t detach and let it be a part of their toolbox together with other healthier behaviors.

I can confidently say that if the narc or borderline come back and try their shit on me, I can play their game just as well as they can. The more I know I have them at my fingertips, the less I want to go back to them. Kind of like their purpose of showing up in my life has been fulfilled and they are no longer needed.


@ysy fair point. I must not of seen that -glasses and all.
Well your reply cleared up your point :blush:

@krass yes I noticed when my true healing had taken… ah I felt that to control you also needed to “be a narc around a narc and they can’t feed off of you” as quoted from someone. But your description has more details.
Question though to achieve this was it more achievable just from choosing to utilise these personality aspect after you no longer give a fk about what that person/s think.?
How would this work if, in keeping in topic from the author of this thread, a person deliberately chise to be with someone with this type of personality disorder??

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