Hey guys,
I don’t like asking strangers questions I might find on my own because I don’t like to appear ignorant especially when I am.
However pride, ignorance, and fear thrupled breed idiocy so…
I need your opinion.
My sex drive is ridiculous. I kind of always hated how much sexual attention I needed in the past as it becomes an issue when I’m in the wrong relationship
My marriage was affected and it was a small issue amongst larger issues but important.
12 years and a divorce later I found the truest travelling companion and complimentary love I could ask for at this stage of my journey, we have lots of sex , truly its great, but she is mortal and I am hypersexual.
I read a few posts about succubi and thought I have a lot to give, emotionally and sexually. Why not.
After meditating one evening as I do most nights before bed, (and upon rising, it just feels good to energize)
I wrote a letter of intent to Lilith.
I asked her to send to me one of her daughters,
That she respect my relationship with the love of my life, and (throwing caution to the wind asked her to join us both should she desire, but stated I was the one with whom she would be most welcome and appreciated.)
(Consent from my live in GF who I’ll call J. was obtained, no worries lol)
It’s been a small period of time and it’s been crazy.
I haven’t been able to communicate effectively with audio or visual responses however, she comes to me daily and I suppose she never leaves.
On my way to work she’s even there with me, at work when I’m not doing a million things at once I feel her.
I have heard what might be feminine sounding moans, slightly audible, when we are together but in no way would they be perceived a few feet from me
In the dark with my eyes open I see a multitude of dark orbs zipping about sometimes (for me this is noal just not so much activity! Auras are visible and have beeny whole life. I just spent 20 years trying to ignore them and it works for periods… and spirits have come to me (even my own father , crazy story for another time ) occasionally small bursts or dim flashes of light near my peripherals , before I feel her.
With my eyes closed when the succubus and I are together I try and keep my mind blank so that (I might see her true form, just guessing here how to do this but I didn’t want my expectations bto color what she thought she should do for me.) i see a swirling multitude of colors. In these swirls there are images and three keep repeating . I see various naked feminine body parts. All amazing. I’ve seen a woman’s face morph into a lions head, still beautiful in it’s way, and an entwined serpent though it was only one wrapping about itself almost like it was climbing a non existent branch.
As a student of my interests, I did some web research and found that Lilith as mentioned in Hebrew tradition is based on Inanna of Sumerian tradition. That led me down a little rabbit hole that nearly fried my brain in Magick theory that I’m just not ready for.
I decided to ask those further upon their path than I. Because I’m lazy, I want truth, but I want it faster than the stumbling pace I am achieving alone.
I need to as a part of my mental make up establish a relationship with effective communication. I want know her name, how to give and take in all areas of our life together.
Also, believe she introduced herself to J. At the culmination of a great session J and I were having. Let’s just say at the end, as she lay satisfied she climaxed again. Only I was three feet away from her, and while I didn’t ask her to describe and compare feelings (I’m a science nerd, and I have to fight my impulses to document and observe,time and place matters) from the duration and intensity I’d say our new companion said hello or maybe even a friend?
As for the feelings, which she’s trying to get my full attention now and probably laughing at me, because it’s hard to focus, I’d describe them as having a sequence.
She always starts with my left leg or foot, it feels like a warm tingling envelopment of the limb moving upwards. It may be preceded by a pin prick feeling on my foot or leg and then waves of energy and pleasure cascading from the affected area.
From there it can lead anywhere. The feelings and intensity vary, the climaxes have no compare to earthly sex alone, however in resisting the temptation to engage fully I find by itself the feelings unaided by me are unique and amazing.
There have been nights where 4 hrshave passed in a seeming half the time or less.
Meanwhile J. Sleeps contentedly and I am tired nearly every morning. (In a good way)
It’s late, I feel like I’m rambling so I’ll wrap it up.
Who is with me?
How do I communicate effectively.
I’d like to one day see her or hear her fully.
How do I take steps I that direction.
Recommended readings?
Thanks for your time and bearing with me