@DarkestKnight I am pretty sure you arent a fan of new age desciription of karma, whats your take on it?
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The karma I’m talking about is a binding visited upon my material prosperity by some uppity “Higher Power” who took it upon itself to punish me because my previous incarnation was someone who caused untold suffering in his pursuit of wealth. As the spiritual and material are really one and the same, by binding my spiritual prosperity, the force also bound any material success.
I don’t believe in any universal check and balance kind of karma, as in you do bad and so bad is done to you. This is a personal thing that this higher power decided to do on its own for whatever reason. I don’t know enough about the why of it, only that it happened, and with the help of @Lady_Eva, Paimonia, Belial, Odin, and a nameless African shaman, a few years ago, I believe I’ve broken the binding or at least lessened it’s grip by doing some form of reparations. However, I am still struggling with material prosperity, which I think is linked to a deep sense of guilt over my previous life.
Various divinations have pointed to some really serious forces at work behind my life right now, that I’m still trying to identify, but they are moving pieces around and setting me up for something big.
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Are you able to do a blind evocation of the forces behind the changes in your life?
Maybe the roomick system might help?
10/4/20
Day 15:
Another late start. Haven’t been sleeping well lately so I wind up waking late in the day.
I’m still working on increasing my energy sensitivity and decided to chant some Words of Power to get a feel for the distinct energetic signature of each.
430 PM - relaxed into a light Alpha state, and vibrated the Divine Name EL for 5 minutes. I then rested for a few moments, and then vibrated for another 5 minutes. The Name resonated deeply in my chest, and cause a light shift in my trance.
After taking a few deep breaths, I vibrated the Name again for 5 minutes, this time in a sing-song way, with a rising and falling intonation. The energy of the vibration moved from my chest to my throat and back again, and there was a definite shift in my head.
8 PM - Connected with the angel Yisrael using the visionary pathworking from the book Raziel’s Paths of Power Volume 2. I found it fairly easy to slip into the visualisations, despite the electric light being on in my room which it made it difficult to imagine being in darkness. The method felt remarkably similar to a shamanic journey. I tasked to angel to improve my imagination.
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11/4/20
Day 16:
3 PM - Tried an Enochian version of the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram. Stumbled over the pronunciations, and the movements were awkward. It’s been a long while since I’ve performed a LBRP. Will require memorisation.
6 PM - Relaxed into Alpha, followed by vibration of God Names for ten minutes each.
EL - the energetic effect of this Name was subtle. Vibration was contained in the chest, and seemed to stir the Anahata chakra. The external environment felt energetically lighter, and fresher, like it had just been aired out by a summer breeze.
EL SHADDAI - the effect of this Name was stronger than the previous. Felt the vibration ripple through the whole body, though it was more pronounced in the upper chakras. Internally, I had the impression that my subtler bodies were shaking loose. The Name seemed to ripple outward in the external environment, like a heat mirage.
YOD - HEH - VAHV - HEH - the vibration of this Name had the strongest energetic effect. It moved throughout my body, making my skin tingle, and causing some light dizziness. It’s effect on the external environment seemed to be one of demand. It felt like a very pushy, almost authoritarian energy compared to the others.
1130 PM - chanted the angelic mantra for the senses found here for 25 minutes. The effect was light and subtle. Felt energy move along my hairline and on the crown of my head, in the Sahasrara, then down the back of my scalp to the Ze’al chakra.
2 AM - breath awareness meditation with Theta isochronic tone for 30 minutes.
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12/4/20
Day 17:
8 AM - Some basic yoga asana followed by meditation on the breath for 30 minutes. Mind was a maelstrom of activity this morning.
930 AM - Enochian Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram. It’s well known that Aleister Crowley reversed the cardinal directions for Fire and Air in the LBRP, so I attempted to perform this ritual today with the correspondences given by Damon Brand in his book Archangels of Magick, putting Fire back in the East, and Air in the South as they were originally attributed in the oldest known Kabbalisitic writings and beginning in the North, instead of the East. i did feel a distinct shift in the energy, but will need to practice more to confirm that it wasn’t just in my head, as the ritual is still a bit clunky due to having to follow directions.
330 PM - Soul Travel practice. Relaxed into Alpha, pulled energy through the chakras, and performed the blue flame meditation, before syncing breath and using the exhale to exit the body. I believe I was successful, and projected to my bed from the chair in which I was sitting. It was more of a mental projection though, with my awareness split between the projection and my physical body. It was difficult not to be sucked back in upon inhalation. Need to practice solidifying the connection to the object I projected to, in order to prevent the return to the body.
7 PM - Relaxation into Alpha and vibration of Divine Name IAO for ten minutes. This Name carries a nice energy. There is less religious controversy regarding its orgins attached to it, and it flows very nicely. It felt similar to the energy of EL, though perhaps not as refreshing.
Followed IAO with the vibration of the first Enochian Key. This was the first time I’ve tried the Keys, and it was very unwieldy. No one agrees on the correct pronunciation so I used a phonetic guide I found through Google, but even with the struggles to pronounce the words, I felt the energy inherent in them. The Key seemed to affect my head mainly, making me lightheaded and dizzy. More practice is required though.
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13/4/20
Day 18:
I felt off the entire day. Don’t know why. Performed the Enochian LBRP around 3 PM, but didn’t do anything else. Wasn’t focused and found myself easily frustrated and angry. Little petty annoyances made me seethe. Almost blew up in the grocery store.
Was unaccountably tired and fell asleep early which is why I’m just updating this journal now.
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14/4/20
Day 19:
1045 AM - Breath awareness meditation for 30 minutes, followed by the Enochian LBRP. I got a definite sense of the energy moving. Using the elemental correspondences of Brand, instead of those of the traditional LBRP, seems to click things into place better. Standing in the centre, the pentagrams were stronger, and the archangels felt more present.
I’m not sure I will continue with this particular banishing for much longer though. I’ve always had a sort of meh feeling towards the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram and the Enochian version only somewhat alleviates that, probably due to its novelty.
I do have to say, though, that it feels pretty good to get back to my ceremonial roots. Strengthening my basics is something I’ve sorely neglected in my zeal for evocation.
330 PM - Stillness training for 30 minutes. I was able to remain completely still for most of the allotted time. Lying on the floor in the corpse pose helped as it wasn’t so comfortable that I could fall asleep. It’s good to know I haven’t lost the physical stillness. Now, I have to add the internal element and that’s always a bitch. Even on a good day, my brain never wants to remain quiet for too long, even with a focus.
7 PM - Trancework and chakras. I was able to slip into a nice Alpha state and practice the pendulum visualisation from the Soul Travel course (it’s also in the OAA curriculum) for ten minutes. Couldn’t keep it straight though. The visualisation kept wanting to swing around in circles. I followed it with pulling down power through my chakras and vibrating the Bija mantras. I completed the work with the blue flame meditation.
1200 AM - Breath awareness meditation for 30 minutes
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No, the version I’m following simply uses Enochian words of power instead of the usual Hebrew; everything else is basically the same as the regular LBRP so I am calling on the usual four archangels in the cardinal directions.
The four kings might be worth trying though 
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15/4/20
Day 20:
Another late start to my day.
330 PM - Enochian LBRP. I’m slowly getting a handle on the pronunciations…I think.
545 PM - Stillness practice. Was easy enough not to move, but I tried to regulate my breathing and that caused a lot more tension in my body and mind. Due to this peculiarity of biology, I think it might be best simply to bring my awareness to my breath rather than consciously trying to force it into an unnatural rhythm.
8 PM - Introspection regarding the designing of personal rituals for my offering to the forum.
All in all, it was a slow, uneventful day. I ordered a copy of Stephen Flower’s Hermetic Magic, and John DeSalvo’s Lost Art of Enochian Magick, but they will take a month to get here due to the low priority Amazon is giving to anything non-medical related.
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No, they won’t refund an order because they have a big banner on their website that says right up front that they give priority to medical supplies, so I knew it would be a long wait before I ordered.
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16/4/20
Day 21:
11 AM - Depth relaxation upon awakening.
115 PM - Enochian LBRP. Seems to be flowing better now. I get a good sense of the energy and the presence of the archangels. Had a solid visualisation of the cardinal pentagrams.
530 - Stillness practice for 30 minutes. Was able to maintain the physical immovability for the full allotted time, and also managed a few minutes of inner stillness as well.
9 PM - Depth relaxation, and outer dissolving practice. I can’t believe how much tension I’m carrying in my body. Any attempt at relaxing beyond removing mere surface tension actually makes my limbs ache.
1030 PM - Further depth relaxation and outer dissolving practice. I feel that I need to free up the trapped emotions causing blockages in both my physical and energy bodies so my chi can flow unhindered.
1230 - Breath awareness meditation.
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17/4/20
Day 22:
9 AM - Depth relaxation upon awakening, and followed with breath awareness meditation for 20 minutes.
1115 AM - Enochian LBRP. This felt rather flat today, and I’m not sure why. Could be that I just wasn’t into it today. My own energy seemed to flow smoothly, but the pentagrams and archangels were not very solid.
230 PM - Chakra work and Soul Travel practice. Was able to enter an nice solid trance state, and project, but still having difficulty staying out of my body. Projection is still mostly mental, as I haven’t been able to release the hold on my consciousness completely yet.
545 PM - Pathworking with Raziel. I asked for a protection glyph but am unsure if what I received really came from Raziel or if it was created by my own imagination. When working in vision, my scepticism and doubt come to the fore more than usual, since it is the imagination that is the bridge to contact. It is very similar to shamanic journeying, so I think the more I practice this particular method of magick, the more “real” it will seem.
1030 - Depth relaxation and stillness practice. Was feeling overfilled from supper so was unable to fully relax.
130 AM - Decided to do a second Enochian LBRP before sleep.
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18/4/20
Day 23:
930 AM - Depth relaxation upon awakening, followed by breath awareness meditation for 30 minutes.
1100 AM - Enochain LBRP. The ritual felt a bit more solid today, though not as strong as previously. My energy seems to be fluctuating a lot. Have felt pretty lethargic lately, and my mind fuzzy.
3 PM - Chakra work and Soul Travel practice. I wasn’t able to connect very well to the energy. Everything felt a bit dull, and I could not project.
8 PM - Depth relaxation practice. It was difficult to relax deeply. Only managed to reduce the surface tension.
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19/4/20
Day 24:
7 AM - Depth relaxation upon awakening, followed by breath awareness meditation for 20 minutes.
930 AM - Second depth relaxation. Need to go deeper, and break through the character armour built from the tension caused by trapped emotions in my physical and energetic bodies.
Spent some time throughout the rest of the day reading up on various models of consciousness, like Leary’s Eight Circuit model, and Bandler’s Meta-Programs model.
Did some work on designing the rituals for my offering to members of the forum. Will commence performance of them this week.
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20/4/20
Day 25:
Spent today mainly focused on practicing depth relaxation. I carry a lot, and I do mean a lot, of tension in my physical body, particularly in my shoulders and neck. This is most likely due to life stress, that “little human poison” as Belial once called it, but I suspect there are also underlying subconscious causes as well.
Power flows the easiest through a relaxed conduit, so if I really want to increase my personal energy, I need to do more than just charge up my chakras and fill my dan tiens. I have to break up and dissolve the kinks in the hose, so to speak, so there are no obstructions to the river of chi. However, I’m not sure the depth relaxation will be enough to accomplish that.
I’ll have to go back to my books and try to incorporate the dissolving practices of the Water Tradition of Nei Gong taught by Bruce Franzis more as well. It is a slower process than the more common Fire Tradition, but possibly more thorough.
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21/4/20
Day 26:
7 AM - Depth relaxation with breath awareness meditation upon awakening. Decided to try breathing through my chakras. The effect was…interesting. Felt a strong sensation of energy in the Muladhara, the Svadhisthana, and the Sahasrara.
The Sahasrara in particular produced the strange impression that I had a hole in the top of my head.
930 - Did a second depth relaxation. Was able to relax my body in less time. It’s still not a complete and total relaxation but it’s progress.
330 PM - Chakra exercise. Got a strong impression of energy flow through and around my chakras. Had the feeling that my energy system is beginning to open up more, though I’m not experiencing release of any trapped emotions yet.
I’ve been thinking of resuming my aspect operation, only rather than evoking the angels and demons, I would instead work in vision, using the pathworkings from Raziel’s Paths of Power and the Goetia Pathworking.
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22/4/20
Day 27:
I forgot to update this before bed last night.
6 AM - Depth relaxation followed by breath awareness meditation for 30 minutes.
1030 AM -Enochian LBRP. I had skipped this practice for a couple of days so it felt a bit flat, and dull. The energy didn’t really flow and didn’t feel solid.
I’ve been thinking about the history of the Ars Goetia. There are many different theories as to what the spirits of the Goetia actually are. Some claim they are former pagan gods “demonised” by the conquering religion, and others claim they are just like humans, with their own lives, living on their own plane. Still others believe they are aspects of the human mind given form.
In his Modern Goetic Grimoire, the Christian magician Rufus Opus posits that the word “Goetia” is derived from a Greek word meaning howling, or lamenting, and is actually an ancient shamanic form of magick that predates neo - platonic philosophy or celestial hierarchies, and was practiced by magicians called “Goets,” whose name refers to the guttural sounds made by their conjurations. He claims that this was originally a terrestrial form of magick that dealt with spirits of nature, and of the dead, and that the spirits are part of the Chthonic Underworld that lies beneath and behind what we normally perceive, the land of potential, of the unmanifest.
To the Goets of ancient Greece, the magick was a way of life, not simply something you did to make the girl next door love you, or to bring you some extra money. However, we don’t have an accurate model of true Goetic magick, so all we are left with is what was tacked on to the Lemegeton by renaissance authors, who were firmly entrenched in the neo-platonic cosmology of hierarchies. In true Goetic magick, there was no such thing as Hell, or the “Infernal,” and the spirits named in the Goetia certainly didn’t live there.
This gives a lot of food for thought on how the 72 spirits are approached in modern times.
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23/4/20
Day 28:
Today has just felt…off. From awakening with a crink in my neck which made the depth relaxation next to impossible, to dragging my feet around the house, to just having the constant urge to sleep, it has felt like I was swimming through mud. Brain fog and lethargy were constant companions.
I took a nap in the afternoon and had a bizarre dream. I was observing a battlefield of some sort, and there were bodies piled up all around. A woman stood in the centre of the field, bloodied blade raised high, and raven hair flying in the cold wind. She wore some kind of tarnished armour, I think it might have been gold or silver at one time, but was now caked in blood and sweat. A huge form stood before her; there was a mist or fog that flowed around everything and obscured my vision so I couldn’t see directly what it was that she was fighting, but I did receive a deep impression that she was fighting it alone, however. Her companions, her warriors, were all scattered, dead or dying, at her feet. I was not a participant in this dream, but merely a watcher. I did not know if I was there to observe her fall, or her triumph.
I woke up feeling like microwaved dog shit, my mind still beset by the fog of that battlefield. It took a few moments for reality to start moving again.
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