I made a bloody pact with Lilith, in which I sold my soul to her irrevocably. Is it possible to terminate the pact if I devote my life to Christianity as a clergyman and go to a monastery?
You have free will, you can break the pact by stating you are breaking it.
Don’t worry, this is not a thing. It’s fiction and only in your imagination, its not magick. As you should know by now being on BALG, experienced mages know you cannot “sell your soul”, because you don’t own it… this is Hollywood silliness for entertainment and drama only.
To “devote my life to Christianity as a clergyman and go to a monastery” is a new and unrelated pact, that has nothing to to with the first and has no effect on it.
There may be a consequence of breaking the agreement, such as, Lilith stopping any benefits she was providing when you stop keeping up your end the deal.
Not sure what’s going on with you man, but you’re being your own worst enemy.
Are you having symptoms or unusually bad luck or something, and that’s why you keep asking these rebated questions about issues with entities.
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Problem is she already don’t help me in protection against other demons, or it’s my own problem in my mind where I see them everywhere
What exactly are you seeing with these “other demons”? What is the problem?
“What you fear is what you find “, fear is a very powerful emotion that manifests exactly what you’re afraid of. So yeah, you can do it to yourself. Voodoo takes full advantage of this where they can curse people without doing and real work just by telling someone they’re cursed, for example.
Can you give as example of “seeing a demon” and why it’s a problem? I bet you see clouds a lot too and they don’t bother you?
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When I close my eyes many names of demons pop out in my mind, I feel fear and fear connects me to them. That happened so many times, that I lost count. After I feel only more afraid and I go trapped in cycle
So your problem the fear itself, not demons. That’s what you should fix.
Do you know why you are afraid? What do you think is going to happen?
Have you tried banishing? parasites could be causing this, but they will also be attracted by it. Banishing and setting up good wards to keep your space clear is usually done to keep uninvited entitues away from you.
I would also look into a detox. Fear implies an energetic imbalance in the kidneys, which are badly affected by toxins in food and your environment. Detoxifying them with a clean healthy diet can help balance that energy.
There are different people with different experiences. My unverified personal gnosis(!) is that you can sell your soul, because you are your soul experimenting with this instrument. If your body take uninspired actions, it will quickly lower your soul vibration for example. There are also experiences in this forum that demons will make you suffer in the next incarnation if you not finish a pact or whatever.
Breaking pacts, especially such a big pact can quickly kill, or maybe in your case nothing will happen. But asking Lilith about the pact, renegotiate the pact or such things is seem to be a good idea. Evoke her motherly aspect, maybe that will help. In this forum we can see that many times Astaroth is full of kindness, but when the same person broke the pact with Astaroth she destroyed the natural defense of that person against parasites, which is worse than death of the body.
After I gone to magick, I don’t feel myself free in my own mind. My mind full of harsh, violence and fear. I want to live it through my mind. But now mind is instrument to connect with spirits and it makes me run off my mind, myself. I can’t think about for example myself beating demonic king and taking victory because now it makes me visible to them in the astral world. And it brings real problem
It didn’t change your line at all right?
It sounds like you are winding yourself up. There are No demons, tie not connecting to anything by inventing stories in your head, but the story’s scare you anyway.
I would suggest a different tack:
One, try the techniques people use for negative self talk to unlearn them, like “tapping”. Look into that on YouTube… every time a negative story starts, stop it, know that this is just a story and not real, and let it go.
Two, write down the stories, to “get them out” of your system, then burn the paper to exorcise them.
Three, know that you are stronger than this, and stronger than any astral entity. You have a massive advantage over any spirit on Earth because of two things: you have a body which is a powerhouse generating energy they don’t have (which is why parasites want it) and you have free will. You’re a tank. Nothing can harm you without your permission. Realize this. Nothing can do jack shit to you, especially these images that are no different than tv in your head. They have no substance.
Four, talk about this with a god therapist who can guide you through strengthening your mind and clearing phobias.
Five, use smudging with white sage to banish and cleanse. Get it from a health food store and just waft the smoke over your body to help clear negative energy. Do this daily.
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You thinking about breaking a pact. Which is very dangerous. Being in that pact don’t cause any bad events in your life, I understand right?
You created low subconscious patterns. For example if a person say something bad to an other person then maybe that person make a subconscious belief/block in throat that he can never speak to anybody. Be aware of these patterns one by one.
Maybe you connect dots wich are not really realistic, like one of my first post in this forum was that Yahweh attacking me, but I connected wrong dots and only partially was it true.
Or you are really in big trouble and other magicians don’t understand that somebody can be killed in seconds by a deity or somebidy just having experiences of being weakly attacked by deities, but not always frieds the deities.
That’s not the same thing as “selling your soul”, that’s part of the agreement, and can be fixed… it’s also upg not verified which is important. In each case I guarantee you free will on earth gets you out. But this is not the point of this post.
Also What is experienced, and the interpretation and explanation of that, are two entirely different things.
We have a thread called “experienced magickians debunk selling your soul” because it’s a newbie misunderstanding at best. It’s worth a read.
I understand. It was just a example of how the path of a soul can be constrained by entities. Even if they maybe can’t fully take control over the soul.
This pact doesn’t bring bad events to me. Problem is in other demons wich I feel connect with and I don’t think that pact is working because of it. They make me feeling bad, pain and I experience fear
I also wanted to sell my soul to Lilith with blo*d, but I think she didn’t even showed up, I didn’t even had basic ritual settings. So from the things you write in this thread, you didn’t mention any “real, factual” happening what would really mean that the entities attacking you. For example spirits said that you are attacked? Or there are any experiences which are beside emotional pains are have? Which chakra you feel blocked?