Is it a parasite? #2

[zzzzln]

This is my first topic on the forum. If you want to know more about the background, you can check:

Is it a parasite?

English is not my native language, I use a translator, and I hope I can explain things clearly: I hope someone can help me distinguish whether this spiritual body is a parasite or not. I have always felt as if there is a spiritual body following me since I was young, which is a inexplicable feeling. Perhaps it’s the credit of this spiritual body rather than my own intuition or something. That spiritual body may help me predict things, such as meeting classmates on the street later, which univ…

Now things have turned into this:

My guiding spirit seems to want to enter a romantic relationship with me and make a commitment to him.

Last year, he seemed to express his desire to fall in love with me, but I didn’t believe it and thought it was just a way for him to approach me.

Now, long before this incident turned into this, Vassago seemed to tell me through a dream that I shouldn’t start a romantic relationship with him. Falling in love with him would be terrible, making me very tired and tired of dealing with his emotional needs. And in the end, I won’t be able to break up with him, he doesn’t want to break up with me.

At first, the guiding spirit was relatively gentle, maybe he made me feel like I trusted him or wanted to have a closer relationship with him. For my feelings, although I feel strange, his attitude is that if you need me, you can come to me anytime. I refused.

In daily life, he will help me with many things, except for the fact that he wants to fall in love with me. It seems that he doesn’t seek anything in return and is very considerate.

Later on, it gradually became intense. He seems to be jealous of my friends and doesn’t want me to have too much contact with them. I did divination and the result showed that he had a strong desire for control and hoped that I would make a commitment to him.

In magick, before seeking help from him, he usually gave me advice and answers. Now he no longer helps me, like he never replies to my messages again. I don’t know if it’s related to his intention to no longer help me. Recently, just making a summon every day has exhausted me, and reciting spells feels very difficult and tired.

My divination results indicate that he also knows that I don’t like this and that our relationship is a bit bad now and needs to be repaired. But he still wants me to promise, he thinks I’m a bit irresponsible. I don’t quite understand why he must make this commitment instead of just maintaining a relaxed relationship.

So is he a parasite? Perhaps he did it for the sake of monopolizing my energy or worse, and that is why he was so anxious. But I have tried to expel him several times, but without success.

If he is not a parasite, I would like to know if there is any peaceful way to solve this matter.
Any suggestion is great.

[Mulberry]

@zzzzln

My guiding spirit seems to want to enter a romantic relationship with me and make a commitment to him.

I’ve experienced something like this, and I’ll say upfront I did not handle it well and heads rolled.

What happened was my connection with my mentor was usurped by another spirit who wanted this. At first I though it was my guide and pretty confused at the sudden change in personality, which because obvious why when I realised it couldn’t show me my guides sigil and gave me a “new one just for my personal use”.

Yeah right.

Where I fucked up, was this was in the end a rather nice and beneficial Fae that could have been a lovely relationship. What I absolutely could not handle was the lying that he did to get my attention. While I get that where was no other way with my wards being what they are, pretending to me my mentor is still not in any way cool or acceptable. I kind of regret burning him but kind of don’t.

I did pretty much end my mentorship as well though there’s no animosity between my former mentor and I, the Fae is still alive, I helped him find help after I damaged him but he’s not speaking to me and we don’t talk. I can find him any time but I don’t.

So my first question based on that would be, check it’s actually him by asking him for the sigil of who he says he is.

@zzzzln

My divination results indicate that he also knows that I don’t like this and that our relationship is a bit bad now and needs to be repaired. But he still wants me to promise, he thinks I’m a bit irresponsible. I don’t quite understand why he must make this commitment instead of just maintaining a relaxed relationship.

I’d run with this intuition myself, if it’s fishy it’s not you it’s because it sounds super sketchy. Judging you as “irresponsible” is just out there and in abuser territory more expected from humans and ghosts and lesser minded and just young beings in general than what I’d expect from a higher being or Jinn 1000s of years old. Young beings are very me-centric and have not figure out they’re not the center f the universe yet.

@zzzzln

So is he a parasite? Perhaps he did it for the sake of monopolizing my energy or worse, and that is why he was so anxious.

Possibly, it kinds sounds like it because of the coercion and pressure and refusal to leave nicely. if he had your interests at heart he’s know he could respect you, leave and know you’d call him when you’re ready. That’s the mature thing to do.

If he’s siphoning your energy that’s pretty much the definition of a parasite: it’s not a consensual relationship. A symbiote also does this but with permission is return for payment in kind, which is why incubi are called symbiotes more than parasites, but both need your energy.

@zzzzln

But I have tried to expel him several times, but without success.

This is a massive red flag so I can see why you’re concerned. It’s not fun to be railroaded.

I’m my case I asked the impostor to leave and he refused, kind of like a petulant boyfriend so doesn’t want to break up, and I attacked him with fire which hurt him and he retreated, only to cry within earshot which made me angrier and I attacked him harder and he had to run to live. (So you can see why he still isn’t speaking to me.) I feel like a bit of a dick tbh so I don’t entirely recommend being this heavy handed and trying to talk it out first, which i didn’t. It’s a bit my way to shoot first and ask question later.

I think I would

1. fully banish while explaining that this is necessary, that I need the space to think as myself uninfluenced, and reassuring the entity that I will call them back when I have had some time.
2. Then I’d set up a ward specifically against that entity and
3. call the first entity, call him “A”, using his sigil or usual method, attempting to ensure the connection is not hijacked
4. Ask A if he is also entity B.

Go from there, asking for signs, looking for differences in tine, personality and energy.

In the end, each entity has it’s own “personal signature” as I call it, an energetic feeling that is unique and unreproducible, almost like a smell for humans, nobody ever smells quite like someone else. My Fae usurper was mimicking my mentors energy signature, but not perfectly and the personality changes were marked (which was the tipoff, that massive and weird change of goals from “I want to tech you how to kill parasites in every way possible” to “let’s fuck”… ffs ). The glamour also slipped when I was friendly to it.

So there are ways to tell and it’s hard being all unseen but doable when you are sensitive, as you are, it just take time and work and lots of communication. Kind of like with humans really

After that, let’s say A and B turn out to actually be the same entity, then I think you already made your decision and he has to respect it. “No means no” bruh, a boundary has been set, and boundaries are not to be pushed. While you are happy to continue as before, you are then placing the ball’s in his court if he wants to act mature enough keep working with you under platonic circumstances or if he’s going to be a pissy boy and so sulk. There are plenty more entities to work with, you don’t need him if he can’t work with you on your terms. It’s hard enough being human without that bullshit.

[zzzzln]

Thank you for sincerely sharing your experience and suggestions. Maybe it feels like losing a good friend.

@Mulberry

sudden change in personality

But I don’t seem to have it, it seems that it’s mostly him since childhood. It feels like he has always been like this, and his jealous personality seems to have always been there. The way he treats me has not changed either

@Mulberry

it couldn’t show me my guides sigil and gave me a “new one just for my personal use”.

Because I seemed to have dreamt of him before, and I felt a special feeling in that dream, I used that feeling as a connection, gave him a name, and then made a sigil. I only used that sigil to summon once, as the first summon of my life. Later, doing divination said that I successfully summoned him. I never summoned him again because I’m not sure who he is, so I think it’s better to be careful when approaching him.

He seems to have been unwilling to tell me his identity. Vassago didn’t tell me either, just told me not to be with him. I never knew who he was, it really made me wonder

@Mulberry

if it’s fishy it’s not you

I understand what you mean, I don’t owe anyone any responsibility. But I do tend not to consider the future in any relationship. I think making such a commitment is very heavy. All my exs commented on me like this when we broke up

@Mulberry

If he’s siphoning your energy

I don’t know if he has absorbed my energy. Perhaps? And that’s why he never asked for anything in return

So I think perhaps the current situation is that I don’t have a guiding spirit, he just sat in this position from the beginning. Perhaps I should think about how to persuade him to calm down. For me, I think this matter is very tricky because Vassago gave me a quite difficult prediction.

Also, how can I know his identity? I have asked three spirits several times for who he is, but they have not told me, I don’t know why. If he is really difficult to handle, I will try to give up on him. I can’t stand him now, even though he’s really good

[Mulberry]

@zzzzln

Perhaps I should think about how to persuade him to calm down.

This sounds more like it. You have an entity that is very close to humanity in traits and attitudes, and this could be a learning moment for him in how to negotiate and work with other people.

If this was a physical human male it would be all the same issues and arguments, you just don’t have the physical downsides a human stalker, but you don’t have the easy physical “lock the door and call the police and get a restraining order” option you’d have with a stalker either.

On the other hand if you have to use your power as a human to teach him this lesson the hard way there’s noone to stop you. It’s between you and him.

@zzzzln

Also, how can I know his identity? I have asked three gods several times for who he is, but they have not told me, I don’t know why.

It sounds to me like he’s a human ghost. That makes him technically still human, one who has not dies the 2nd death to become something else, and they are barred from interfering by the rule of free will that human’s enjoy on this planet.

@zzzzln

If he is really difficult to handle, I will try to give up on him. I can’t stand him now, even though he’s really good

It sounds like he’s used up all his chances, you’ve tried really hard to be understanding and work with him and he’s not negotiating as a mature person who values the relationship. Going no contact is in the end the last resort. And as he’s not got a body you are in the drivers seat and far stronger. Having a body for a spirit is like having an onboard nuclear (self healing) power station that feeds you energy constantly, that’s pretty unbeatable and why living humans are so attractive.

If he’s a ghost (if, not sure, but it sounds likely) what he might need is a psychopomp, he’s in his own way and would be better off finishing this cycle and moving on with his spiritual evolution. I would reach out to a god of the underwork like Ereshkigal, Charon (ferryman for the River Styx that helps people cross over to Hades, Hel, or similar that works for you. Have them come get him, or try calling those he loved in life that have moved on to help him.

If he’s not willing to be authentic and communicate what he’s about then you might have to just attack him to get him to leave as if he was a regular parasite. Or go no contact and cut him off from your energy like how using Grey Rock works on narcissists.

[crookedpathfinder]

@zzzzln

My guiding spirit seems to want to enter a romantic relationship with me and make a commitment to him.

@zzzzln

Vassago seemed to tell me through a dream that I shouldn’t start a romantic relationship with him. Falling in love with him would be terrible, making me very tired and tired of dealing with his emotional needs.

Sounds like a parasite to me. I think Vassago is trying to help you and you should listen.

That ain’t no guide.

@zzzzln

first, the guiding spirit was relatively gentle, maybe he made me feel like I trusted him or wanted to have a closer relationship with him.

@zzzzln

Later on, it gradually became intense. He seems to be jealous of my friends and doesn’t want me to have too much contact with them. I did divination and the result showed that he had a strong desire for control and hoped that I would make a commitment to him

Sounds like he was slowly trying to groom you before showing his true colors to me…

@zzzzln

he is not a parasite, I would like to know if there is any peaceful way to solve this matter.
Any suggestion is great.

Even if he isn’t, he chose to act like one and should be dealt with accordingly.

There are many guides. He isn’t the only one, and if he chose to be a problem he needs to btfo and make room for better ones that have healthier boundaries.

The peaceful option is to tell him to fuck right off.

Otherwise, punish him.

[zzzzln]

Thank you for your answer. You really have a wealth of knowledge and experience.

@Mulberry

If he’s a ghost

I will ask other spirits again to confirm this matter.
A bit sad, because I think he should at least be a somewhat intelligent creature. Because I always thought he might have helped me a lot in my growth. Now it seems that those may be my own credit. I feel like I’ve wasted my time. But I will still try to clarify this matter before making any decisions

@Mulberry

It sounds like he’s used up all his chances

If I finally find him worth working with, I will still keep him

@Mulberry

Have them come get him

Thank you for your guidance. If necessary, I will

[zzzzln]

Thank you for your suggestion!

@crookedpathfinder

Vassago is trying to help you and you should listen

yes, So I haven’t chosen to enter this relationship yet, and I am posting here to seek more help to deal with him (Additionally, in fact, Vassago shows it as a woman in my dream)

@crookedpathfinder

showing his true colors to me

So I think it’s better to resolve this matter as soon as possible. I originally planned to delay for a few more days

[crookedpathfinder]

@zzzzln

, in fact, Vassago shows it as a woman in my dream)

Interesting, I owe vassago a call. Lol

@zzzzln

I think it’s better to resolve this matter as soon as possible

Preferably, I’d say.

Do as thou wilt

[zzzzln]

He came to remind you to go find him

@crookedpathfinder

Do as thou wilt

[zzzzln]

Hello, I don’t know if I can ask you directly here:

Can human ghosts be much more powerful than humans? One of the spirits I asked told me that my situation was like “a cat in love with a pet mouse”. It seems that this ghost is much stronger than me, and I have no advantage at all. And this ghost says that if I am with him, he can help me improve. He seems to be quite confident about this.

This ghost wants me to keep the relationship a secret and not to tell anyone more details about the relationship. I was angry and wanted to deliberately mess with him, but I immediately sensed that he wasn’t easy to mess with, so don’t mess with him on purpose. I don’t know what the truth is.

What is your opinion on this? Is he a human ghost who has lived for hundreds of years? Or is there any better way to know who he is? I still want to investigate this matter before making a decision. I would like to use “expulsion by force” as the last method to use.

Thank you in advance!

[Mulberry]

@zzzzln

Can human ghosts be much more powerful than humans?

Not usually no. regular ghosts are unskilled, lack the automatic generation of massive amounts of qi that we have, and are slowly fading and dying, they usually have no idea what’s going on or how to help themselves and are reaching out in every way possible to get back to the living, which is the wrong direction but nobody gets taught how to die while alive any more.

The rare exception is the ghost of an accomplished mage who built his subtle bodies up and has learned how to cultivate qi from sources other than the body’s automatic mechanisms such as from the cosmos or the living. Another exception is the ascendeds, which are like dead mages only on steroids.

@zzzzln

One of the spirits I asked told me that my situation was like “a cat in love with a pet mouse”. It seems that this ghost is much stronger than me

If you give your power away, you get what you deserve. Don’t let them play headgames though, it might have a point about awareness and skill, but you have more raw “power”. You’re like a gentle giant. I would say a mouse is a bad analogy unless they’re talking about the disparity in skills.

@zzzzln

And this ghost says that if I am with him, he can help me improve.

Maybe? But it’s a massive red flag for a parasite right there. Bargaining for access to you and making grand promises… instead of just you know, doing it. Tell it to piss or get off the pot. Personally I’d banish it and go talk to a well known, well trusted entity with a strong reputation in the occult community for being somewhat reliable.

This is worth doing until you develop these skills to handle creatures like this that are questionable, so if it goes wrong it’s fine: you know you can finish anything they start.

The other reason it’s a red flag is because no teacher worth his salt tells a student they can improve him.

The ONLY person that can learn and improve himself is the student. The teacher can provide info and support but they cannot do the great work for you. Promised of shortcuts are a red flag for a “teacher” that doesn’t know anything or is lying.

@zzzzln

This ghost wants me to keep the relationship a secret and not to tell anyone more details about the relationship.

More red flags then. Why? If he’s that strong, which sounds like bravado from here, then there’s no issue with any recognition. What does he expect that he’ll have a gaggle of fanboys begging for assistance, I don’t think that’s a risk.

What this is, I feel, (and as it’s a human ghost this comes with the territory), is it’s a verbal abuse tactic to ensure you are isolated and don’t get anyone else’s perspective.

Generally, if you feel something is “off”, and I seems like you do, it’s not you being “oversensitive” it’s because something is really off and it’s probably on purpose.

@zzzzln

Is he a human ghost who has lived for hundreds of years?

If he’s 100s years old he’s definitely replenishing his qi to stay alive that long (not dying the 2nd death) and he’s probably vampirism humans. He might not be draining you and you’d tell if he was, maybeee he’s just got a strong personality and poor social skills, and really does have something worth learning.

The difficulty is he’s not done much to build trust, is behaving suspiciously and there’s a worry that if you accept and he baits and switches that you will have a hard time defending yourself. If he wants your milkshake and starts taking your energy so you get weaker while he gets stronger and the situation gets worse.

At the moment he needs your permission and it sounds like he’s not just attacking you so that’s a positive sign.

@zzzzln

I still want to investigate this matter before making a decision.

I’d try a divination but what the other spirit said doesn’t sound like a mutually beneficial relationship. Not sure which was which and if you’re the cat or the mouse but you don’t want to find out the hard way.

Can you also ask the ghost what’s in it for him?

I have a relationship with a human ex-mage ghost and his answer was that it was part of how he got to be a ghost with this kind of longevity, that he belonged to a culture where mages were teachers and became ghosts in order to continue teaching. So it’s sort of the whole reason he’s still alive and he needs students to provide purpose. He’s part of a larger esoteric order that doesn’t exist in the physical any more but there’s a few of them. Not unlike E’A’'s Ordo Ascensum Aetrynalis with it’s Barons which has now passed into the non physical. My feeling is there’s a lot of mystery schools that operate this way and you hear of people like Blavatsky working similarly with human astral teachers.

So his story is plausible, red flags included, it cold go either way… we do also know that these guys tend to have very strong personalities and aren’t at all fluffy, so a divination is a good idea.

Might be the proof of the pudding is in the eating, and it comes down to a risk/reward situation as to whether you want to give him a chance.

[zzzzln]

Thank you for your detailed and sincere reply!

I have completely decided to expel him. I didn’t summon spirits to kill or banish him, I imagined myself three times summoning fire to burn him to ashes and killing him with a flaming sword. I feel like I’m done with this, and I don’t need to summon anyone to do it for me. Thanks to your sincerely suggestions!

@Mulberry

ghost of an accomplished mage

I guessed if this would be the case, but I didn’t expect it to be a real case in reality. My gut feeling though, is that this is unlikely. And I don’t think it’s possible for the soul of a powerful magician to come to me in such a rude way. I’m also just a beginner and don’t have that much value.

And I gave him enough time, and he had enough time to explain it to me if he had a reasonable reason. I’ve also done divination many times and don’t have much valuable information.

@Mulberry

Can you also ask the ghost what’s in it for him?

I did a lot of divination a year ago trying to figure out what he wanted from me. But it’s all nonsense about love. I didn’t believe it all along, but I didn’t know what to do about it (I didn’t even know that people could summon angels and demons at the time), so I didn’t care about it. Until now.

Although I have felt that he has often helped me in life, I now feel more that he is exchanging these small favors for greater benefits. I feel like it’s a complete waste of my time, and maybe he can’t actually do anything.

Also, I wonder, can ghosts also manipulate people and things in reality?

@Mulberry

doesn’t sound like a mutually beneficial relationship

I did divination, and the message I got was that the relationship would be controlling, like a suffocating relationship in which a superior controls a subordinate at work. He is very possessive and jealous. He also has a strong personality.

@Mulberry

it’s a verbal abuse tactic to ensure you are isolated and don’t get anyone else’s perspective.

I think so too. So I was immediately angry.

By the way, two days ago I was going to ask for help on that topic asking someone to help me, but I found out that the post was locked. Can’t say it’s a coincidence or anything. It’s like it’s going to block all my paths.

For so long, it was as if he couldn’t communicate. Can’t understand him. And the relationship did more harm than good, so I decided to expel him.