I am 50 yrs old. I currently live in Atlanta GA.
Although on October 21 I was all packed up and at the airport for my New Life Move to the Island of Malta in the middle of the Mediterranean sea. That was until the flight to get me to Orlando where my official itinerary began, was delayed by 2 hrs and caused me to miss the flight, which triggered all remaining flights to cancel. YES I KNOW.
IT SUCKS. LUCKILY I have a flexible living situation and am self-employed.
On to the subject of Magic and sorcery and divination. First off. My mama is/was a.Wild Woman of the hippy/witchy type, in this lifetime and many more.
I have Been herbing and natural healing my whole life. So I have always been highly intuitive and spiritually aware and I have been hanging out in the metaphysical stores my entire life, but no structured practice or training. I never embraced anything fully.
Except unrequited love and unavailable men!!! Then I hang on for dear life!!! Nothing is going to get me away from you!!! Committed beyond anything rational or reasonable. 
Hopefully stepping into my Truly Badassery Bitch Power template will put an end to all of that foolishness!!! Or a Love affair with an incubus or demon 
of the sexual nature. *yes I read the threads. Another Clue I have been resisting. 
I don’t like indoctrination into One way of thinking/being/doing things. I am a commingler of many different styles, schools, theories, systems. Don’t judge me!!!
I got AQUARIUS/LEO/GEMINI ISSUES. no earth in my chart. GYPSY blood.Moved 50+ times. No furniture since 2005 
I am praying it won’t get me into too much trouble over here in the Demon realms. 
Please keep me grounded if necessary or at least warned. 
I come from a long matrilineal line of Sexually Expressed Women so the Energetic Imprint I carry is That of Kali/Sekhmet/Lilith/Babylon/sacred whore/High Priestess of the ancient sex Temples vein.
TANTRA/Sex magic are my innate practices (minimal training) and what opened me up to the journey I have been on since 2011.
Although I was told downloaded “Vibration of Creation” ie orgasmic energy was the missing piece not being taught in LOA trainings…Googled sexual Energy manifestation and found Tantra/sex magic and Jujumama/Progressive love
First official magic/ritual-diety experience was in 2011 within H/Kemetic order and Gods/Goddesses divination/Oracle cards and solar/lunar cycles phases for specific purposes to create outcomes.
I am a trained Massage Therapist-Energy Worker and Tantric Alchemist…transmutation of the darkest traumatic Energies. . I swear in the trenches Shadow Work is where I thrive. I am not gonna leave you there alone unless you chose it.
So its time to stop playing with the Love and Light BS and get down and dirty with the other side of the spectrum.
*I also had an awakening in mid July that showed me the insidious nature of “the Darkness” i.e.Patriarchy and how could that force create Love/Light/heaven religion…
Hum??? It’s all Reversed. *book topic
Plus I embodied this sadomasochistic slave girl entity who was running my life for the last 8 years. Twin flame/soulmate fuckery of the monumental kind. My whole life philosophy and foundation came crashing down around me that day. Still piecing my reality back together day by day. *book topic
Had to trace it back to an argument with my mom 2010 (called her the most ungrateful person I ever met) and this “demonic/dark heavy” Energy left her body and entered mine and that’s been blinding me to reality. it has been removed. She was cloaked as my inner child. *book topic.
Back story:
Since my 20s or most of my recollection in this lifetime I naturally fell into the "NEW Age/Spirituality and didn’t even believe in “Evil or Devil or demonic forces” primarily because I knew it was all created for fear and intimidation purposes by Christian church. I have an issue with that. But my mom sure talked about demons and such in her life. I used to shut down the whole conversation when she would bring up the Devil/Bible stuff…cause I didnt believe it existed. She had lots of trauma and addiction and abusive relationships.
2017 I took my first Practical/planetary Magic Course “Influence” by Carolyn Elliott…purely to learn Existential kink as a shadow integration technique.
I am also a trained Sensual BDSM Healing Domme and Existential Kink was just what I needed to explore. Plus…i got lots of "evidence of wanting is having " shit to clear out/blind spots sadomasochistic tendencies (didn’t know about the entity then)
So this was my official beginning of formal witching with rituals and offerings and Spell casting and using conjuring oils and candles and channeling intuitively into the Energy of situation, mojo bags and alters to planetary energies (jujumama we had alters for the phase of the sun/moon cycles).
My first introduction to American/European magic traditions Kabalist/esoteric/Alister Crawley exposure or to see how it merged with the Egyptian/hermetic thoth teachings in already trained in.
I still don’t fully invest in any of the systems…to the point of studying all the elements/Energies/deities or daily routines/schedules to remember Monday is Moon-day…Tuesday is Mars-day…etc. it’s actually in there I can pull it out when I need to. But I could never remember to give Jupiter his meal on Thursday or what he desired etc.
Everything with me is intuitive and guided by the in the moment impulse to engage or perform an action. I can’t be bothered by the phrase of the moon…if it’s waning or waxing and do I need increasing energy or decreasing energy for my spell…when I have the insite to do a ritual/spell/chant/speak in spritual tongues, I don’t put it all on hold for 2 weeks until the moon is aligned. SMH
I did manage to light incense daily and still do. And instinctively know when it’s a full or a new moon nearby.
I have since taken her Liminal magic (Dare) this was fun…the order of the sphinx. MOST MAGICAL SELF activation, Octerine Energy. Web of influence. Synovial strips. Crossroads spells and activated orginal Ruins. and Force of Nature (advanced EK plus higher level kabbalaist teachings) but can’t even tell you what each week was about. In FON due to a little witchy feather ruffling in the beginning (an very active contributer blocked me) so I joined group.witj another profile so I wasn’t consistent with the work.
The messages have been coming for the last 3 years. I investigate. try somethings and then retreat. yes growing up in the deep south had an influence even in all my protesting of it not. Which I am currently grappling with and will probably continue to for some time.
Combine that with this empath/codependent template I took on at a young age as the Oldest child with a traumatized mother ie bipolar/adhd/not present as a parent much that I had to take care of along with myself and my little brother…recipe for Over caring and not Much Kill them Bitches mentality.
I still have a challenge with it because I see everyone’s trauma is the cause of their problems/dysfunctional emotions and coping skill deficiencies, especially men and our current system of masculinitising boys.
And I know I have to be balanced in order to be fully prepared and engaged in all aspects of life and the work I am here to do with men. I have to be prepared and equally equipped to protect and defend myself and my family and hold safe space for my clients to transmute their stuck, angry, rage, hate, guilt, shame and traumatic experiences safely.
this is my current incarnation 
