I'm screwing myself over. Any advice?

Not just in magick, in general.

I procrastinate. I overthink everything. In magick if there’s no step by step basis I’m fucking lost; kinda makes me feel like im not fit for this path… but that just makes me want to pursue it further! Kinda like a “fuck you, universe, I’ll do what I see fit” kind of thing. I have no current plan; like just in general; I know what I want to do as an Occupation but no goals set etc. I’m can’t let go of things. Those are the big ones honestly. I hate to make this sound like a sappy “woe is me” post, but what I’m getting at is that these things are inhibiting my magickal practice and just being a functioning human being overall. I don’t have routines and even if I get one going it crash and burns.

I’m kind of a mess. WHAT CAN I DO?!

I was thinking maybe therapy, idk man lol
I know there were a few mods here that talked about spirits for these kinds of things. but referring to the above, if I just get a name of a spirit and thats it; i become uncertain, lost, cold feet, confused etc.

Hope this is an okay status, don’t know if it belongs anywhere specific or is even allowed. Anyways, for things like the above, what do you do to overcome them? What shouldn’t one do? What might these problems lead to for one’s future in magick and other such things?

Thank you, truly.

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To start, search the forum for a banishing ritual. Doesn’t matter which one. Perform it. In fact, perform it badly. Mispronounce the words, make the gestures wrong, whatever but make an effort to fuck it up. When you’re done fucking it up and you see it’s not the end of the world then make an effort to do the ritual again only a little better this time. Forget perfectionism. You will never achieve it and it’s an excuse to do nothing.

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You don;t need therapy dude, look up a book called The Now Habit (it is NOT a “just do it!” shallow bullshit pipedream), it will fix all your shit, which is due to screwy messages from outside and NOT some fundamental flaw.

I’ll try and see if I have anything on my computer for you later that summarises it (we don;t do PDF trading/piracy stuff on here but summaries exist all over the net), bump this and @ me if you don’t see a reply by tomorrow.

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I’ll try this, you’re so right; perfectionism kills me. I’ve give this a whirl, thank you

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I’ll look into this book, thank you. I also remember you sent a post about “to do” boxes or something. I try and dig those up again as well! It’s much appreicated

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Yes, I am pretty passionate about this stuff, it’s saved me from complete mental chaos and the lack of self-respect that accompanies that!

Here are 3 posts I did, I’m going to bump the 2nd that’s got stuff newer members may find useful:

This post I made has loads in as well:

Edit to add, this appeared in my feed recently and it’s VERY good for breaking down the bigger picture of your goals into plausible daily steps:

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You are amazing! Once I finish up my finals for classes this week and start break, I’m going to dive right into all this!

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What you are experiencing is perfectly normal. The advice given before is good so I’m simply replying for encouragement.

  1. We are all a fucking mess and put up a front that we have it together.
  2. If you have a career plan then look up steps to achieving that. Long term goals are made up of short term goals. Take things one step at a time.
  3. Therapy is not a sign of weakness, if you need help coping and truly feel that it is something that would benefit you then adding it to the spiritual treatment ( so to speak) is not a bad plan.
  4. You got this.
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There’s a trend where when you get into an esoteric system, as you progress through it, shit goes screwy as you progress further along.

Basically, to grow spiritually, you have to unbalance yourself then build up so you are balanced again. When you are unbalanced, you can grow, but things are also really unstable until you reach an equilibrium.

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Thank you for the encouraging words! I feel really far behind magickally sometimes. I’ve read about all this for a while (a long while, about 2 years) but keeping consistent has shown hard for me and therefore results are minimal. Once I"m out of school, though, I should have more free time to progress magickally.

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That’s true, I’ve been really unbalanced as of late, for quite a few months. My emotions, especially my anger and hatred, have been going haywire and irrational. I like to think it’s a sign of growth and change; a transition period. Just gotta work through it, find that equilibrium like you said.

The trick is, you may go through many periods of unbalance as you progress on your path, depending on where you end up going with it all. So you have to be ready for things to go screwy when you start taking new steps forward.

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I’m in school and a mother so I get it. I think perhaps your issue is that you haven’t found your style and gotten the flow yet. Experimentation and further reading will help you find yourself and what suits you. That’s why there are several sections on this forum for people who practice a variety of styles of magick. Everyone is different 🤷

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Preach it ! When things come together it seems like everything is falling apart. It’s only after the storm that you realize that a transformation has occurred and everything is now as it should be. Or heading that way at least.

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dont let it get you down magic is unpredictable and some times because of our eger ness or doubt it takes awhile to menifest
calling on entinies to help you thru life might be a good idea
lord marchosios hepls with motivation shapeshifting strengthing combat skills brings change and empowerment in your life helps you get into helthier habbits pushes you thru hard times in lifeteaches and initates lyconthorpy as well

also mistress gusion she helps guide you thru divination passe on concepts ideals and focus on your character devolopment and self perception gives honor a dignity as well

these are just suggestions to help you mold yourself into a person you want to be know that on this path the unimaginable can happen with a few steps and trust trust in your magic trust in your self and if you do demon or angel work trust in them to you can do it you are a being with the power to hange your life and even fate of your life thee are infenate possiblities you can do it no matter how bleek or dark the tunnel there is always a light at the end of it

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Thank you for this, it’s good to hear these things, sometimes one’s in the dark tunnel for so long they forget about the light. I’ll look into these spirits soon and do my best!

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their very nice marchosias can be intemidating at first but he is great motivator and mentor and wonderful to work with n just be around

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make a book of shadows and add the magic you like with steps or something simmliar it will help you …personaly im not good at keeping track of things and i forget things so i took a sharpie to my hand and wrote what needs done :slight_smile:

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It seems that you suffer what many of us in magick suffered at the beggining of our path, that is doubt. You doubt your abilities, you doubt the procedures and you doubt magick in general and i dont blame you. Until it clicks it all feels like make believe, like is all mental. many of us suffered the same. We always thought there was going to be a bigger secret, a bigger and better ritual or spell and as soon we started a new ssytem we begans reading another and got exited and move on to the next and the next never finishing one. You might suffer for what has been termed metaphisical constipation. So much information is hard to just grasp it all.

the best advice is consider doing simple meditation and try to find your motive of why you want to do this in the first place. some are not fit for magick, is harsh but true. Not because they are incapable, all can do magick, is just that is not compatible with their personality. some are bron to be mystics or religionist. And that is fine as long it gets you to your goals. Establish your meditation routine but do not seek or expect anything from it. Just enjoy the exercise purelly. Love the procedure and for a moment forget the result. as if the procedure is applied the result will follow. Then pick a system of work whether is Koettings, or Modern Magick book, or Jason miller Strategic Sorcery course (which is incredibly good by the way) and make a comitment of not reading anything else until you have worked the system to its natural conclusion. This will be hard but you must push even when you dont feel like it, Thas what i did and it worked for me. As a gemini I at the bbegining was an occult junkie, reading and jumping from one ssytem to another until i realize something big!
Like in the Kung Fu panda “THERE IS NO SECRET” one system is as good as the other it all depends on what you put in it. Wether is hermetic magick, Koetting Goth magick, or wiccan magick it does not matter as long as you keep doing the work and daily practice. As long as you keep honning our skill daily and keep a good relationship with the powers you call for aid. In most African derived practices most of their time is devoted on making a close relationship with their powers so when they call on them they are ready for the work.

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WISE words IMO! :+1:

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