I'm losing momentum lately

I had have a couple of magical sucesses and for a short while it seemed like I was taking off, building momentum, and that one small success might logically provide the state of confidence needed to make the next one. But that no longer seems so. I started to practice more and the more I work lately it seems the less actually comes of it. Workings I am doing on my own seem to get nowhere though it feels successful at the time, and a lot of the work I’ve done with any spirits is just not getting any result at all.

I don’t want to walk away from this. Others have some good sucesses here so it seems I should be able to really learn to as well. Any advice on any of this?

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[quote=“Blazewind Bluebird, post:1, topic:5742”]I had have a couple of magical sucesses and for a short while it seemed like I was taking off, building momentum, and that one small success might logically provide the state of confidence needed to make the next one. But that no longer seems so. I started to practice more and the more I work lately it seems the less actually comes of it. Workings I am doing on my own seem to get nowhere though it feels successful at the time, and a lot of the work I’ve done with any spirits is just not getting any result at all.

I don’t want to walk away from this. Others have some good sucesses here so it seems I should be able to really learn to as well. Any advice on any of this?[/quote]

Maybe you’re just going through a Dark Night of the Soul?Have you performed any serious rituals lately,that would mean giving control of life’s circumstances to the powers of magick?

Like the Gatekeeper ritual?Some major transfiguration meditation?Or some other grand thing?

And if you are just going through a Dark Night of the Soul,then that literally means you’re incredibly close and you shouldn’t give up.

So I may wanna ask,what do you want to use magick for at the moment?

Maybe you’re not completely ready for ascent?I know I’m not.I’m still very young,and I’m content learning,for now,the full secrets of magick solely for personal gain.

I wanna be able to manifest things.I wanna be able to control people.I wanna be able to manipulate things,physical and ethereal.I wanna be able to learn from spirits.I wanna be able to learn how to make things.I wanna learn how to become a better person.

There’s tons of stuff that’s literally calling me.Spirits that are coming before me,offering pacts,and I told them,’‘That’s a fabulous idea,I would love to work with you.I will seal a pact with you,once I’m fully ready to embrace my ascent.’’

Because there are two situations you wanna avoid.One is the magician striving for his own exaltation and ascent who isn’t able to,and one is the magician who’s ascending but isn’t ready.

The latter is a gruesome state.He’s whiny,rude,and silly.And he’s everything safe a black magician,because a black magician is happy.

The former is a gruesome state.He’s whiny,rude and silly.And you see those two magicians are exactly the same.

I’m ready for power.I’m ready for knowledge.I’m ready to do the work.I’m just not ready for the consequences of it,nor the benefits.

But I swear,that putting it off,doesn’t mean doing so forever.Sooner or later,all my deepest wishes will come true,and my desires will be fulfilled,and I’ll have all the powers I wanted and all the skills,and it’ll all be hollow.I’ll want apotheosis.I’ll want self-actualization and I’ll want self-transcendence.

And I’ll completely,fully,commit to my ascent.And any spirit that has come before me(I’ll give you the name of the one who came today,the angel:Raziel) will make me more like them.

Many will disagree with my laziness.It’s not laziness,it’s productive procrastination.

Frankly I think your approach is perfect. Sounds like you are willing to take your time to perfect your skills one by one and earn them as we all should. Too many of us get caught up the fast food mentality and we just want it all now. Many people could learn from this thread.

Frankly I think your approach is perfect. Sounds like you are willing to take your time to perfect your skills one by one and earn them as we all should. Too many of us get caught up the fast food mentality and we just want it all now. Many people could learn from this thread.[/quote]

Thank you!

With every post I type on here, I encourage the belief thatmy way isn’t the only way and not the right way but it’s a way.

The power to understand and incorporate Jesus’s teachings of forgiving,and then throw in there Anton LaVey’s teaching of indulgence.

To exist outside of the world of duality and dichotomy…right and wrong,that’s a privelege reserved for children and gods.

Which is why I hold kids in such a huge regard,and why I am so thoroughly disgusted by things like ageism that I’m just rambling randomly on them.

Blessings and giggles on you both!

Sometimes procrastination with magick can be a good thing. While there are some things we will never truly master without just diving in and learning from trial and error, there are other situations in which not taking the time to learn and master your skills first, and diving into something unprepared and only half ready, can have really bad consequences.

I know the thought of failure or giving up can come easy to a magician because the truth is, while some of us seem to be born with magickal gifts, and some just dive right in and catch on right away later in adulthood, some of us need to take extra time to learn and practice. It doesn’t mean anything is wrong with the person that needs to practice more to accomplish something, and it doesn’t mean their heart is not dedicated to the goal, it’s just the way our minds work.

Like an example would be, one person can pick up a soccer ball (or football for those of you who are in European countries) and find that they can play with ease and really kick ass when playing, like it just came naturally to them. While another person, who loves watching soccer/football on TV and yearns to play, can try and try to make the team and even though they love that sport, they suck at it. So magick is similar to talents. Not everybody is capable of achieving everything magickal, but that’s no reason to give up or doubt yourself. Start focusing on the gifts you have and try to perfect the things you know you are good at.

Like some people seem to be naturals at the following things while others just can’t do it. Things like palm reading, connecting with others emotionally to read their personality, communicating with spirits, tarot divination, psychic vampirism, candle magick, and so on. We all have different talents and abilities that are unique to us, and magick is no different.

[quote=“Arcane, post:2, topic:5742”]Maybe you’re just going through a Dark Night of the Soul?Have you performed any serious rituals lately,that would mean giving control of life’s circumstances to the powers of magick?

Like the Gatekeeper ritual?Some major transfiguration meditation?Or some other grand thing?

And if you are just going through a Dark Night of the Soul,then that literally means you’re incredibly close and you shouldn’t give up.

So I may wanna ask,what do you want to use magick for at the moment?

Maybe you’re not completely ready for ascent?I know I’m not.I’m still very young,and I’m content learning,for now,the full secrets of magick solely for personal gain.[/quote]

I feel like you are right. I’m not ready for ascent either. I’m still new at this, and figuring out what I actually want to do with it. Accent is not even really my goal yet. I’m still very much in the stage of ‘let’s see what I can do.’ As you said, its still very much about personal gain. I was thinking this over after I read your reply. It really is about trying to get what I want from life, as I think we all do at first and should do in fact. But at the same time, I struggle with the idea of entitlement, of being deserving of success and personal gain.

While working a ritual about a week ago, I began to get a sense of my own inner power, my own godhood, of how I could command reality to shift because I asked it too. I felt, if only for a second, like a situation could change in life simply because I DEMANDED it do so and had the permission of the universe to ask it to, since it was my life I was asking to become something I wanted to live. Later I found myself feeling almost a tiny bit bad for LIKING the sense of commanding life to obey me.

Oh I completely agree with you there. I know pretty well that I am likely NOT natural at any of this. There are members here who very likely are and honestly I find myself thinking " I so wish" some days, lol. For years I’ve practiced and experimented with enough various related skills, to be sure I’m likely to struggle and stumble for a while where others hit the ground running and take off ahead of me. I’ve never really seem an aura or energy field, though I’ve often tried to do so. I do some tarot reading, but have never had the experience many have recounted of the cards just suddenly giving insight without thinking about it or interpreting. I can’t astral project very well at all. The list just goes on. Basically I have the interest, but not really the full aptitude. Actually I remember EA saying somewhere in one of his videos, that he is not really a naturally gifted magician either, and works hard at everything. Haha, made me think it’s worth sticking with it.

You know, this comes up in just normal life, normal business, my hero David Neagle has a bunch of questions he personally answers to small business owners on his blog and probably 50% of them are this kind of thing - people want success, feel themselves capable of it, yet some underlying belief about whether they deserve it is holding them back.

The book Psycho-Cybernetics also covers this, it was written by a plastic surgeon who realised that changing the outer version of a person’s looks in some cases changed how they saw themselves and therefore changed their lives, and the author, Maxwell Maltz (another genius) kind of reverse-engineered that into simple exercises to help people feel different, often with no surgery needed.

I highler recommend the book, the original with the red & white cover (check the review on Amazon, there’s a later version that’s a re-write by another author and now as good) and it pre-dates pretty much every other self-improvement book out there, it’s pretty simple and very effective iMO. :slight_smile:

As for natural talent… I don’t let things like that in my mind, there are a million people out there with amazing voices, whereas Madonna’s voice (as you can see in her earliest live concerts) was strictly mediocre, yet she’s Mdaoona and all those naturally talented people are singing as they hang the washing outside their shack at 6 in the morning, before a long day’s hard work for a pittance…

Just do your best with what you’ve got, don’t worry if you can’t master all areas right away, and you already have great insight that the blocks are inside you, so move on that - what you believe about yourself, you can change, and I highly recommend that book as a guide! :slight_smile:

This idea of magical momentum has me intrigued lately. I’m finding that the more experience I get, the less results I get, particularly when it comes to getting certain spirits to do certain tasks.

Say I get Spirit A to get me Result 1. The first time, Result 1 comes amazingly and fast. I’ll call on Spirit A again to get me results in a similar or related task. The results aren’t as amazing or fast. The more I call on Spirit A to perform the same task, the less results I get. Eventually the results will be lackluster or there will be no results at all. Calling a new spirit to help Spirit A, or turning to a new spirit to take over the job, will bring results like it did the first time.

It doesn’t seem to be just me. I’ve spoken to others who have experienced the same thing with their spirits. This is strange to me, because I thought that the more experienced you become, and the stronger your bond with a spirit, the more you can ensure your chances of success.

What is going on here, and is this something that can be helped?

Salpinx and Blazewind, you two are like the 5th or possibly 6th people I have seen mention this lately. This has not personally happened to me, but from what I can gather it seems to be discouraging or depressing to those who are experiencing it. There has to be some common link between those who feel stuck in this cycle but everyone practices magick so differently that it may be hard to pinpoint.

Is there anything in particular you started or stopped doing when it suddenly seemed as if the spirits were not coming thru for you? This could even be a minor breakthrough point. Did you know, that at certain points throughout your training and studies, if the spirits you work with take you seriously and you do them, they may begin to test you and ignore you purposefully. This is not their way of shunning you or turning their back on you, unless of course you have done something to anger them, but usually it’s a test.

Sometimes, since the spirits are ultimately wiser than we, they are aware even before you are that have you reached a point in your magickal studies where you should be starting to advance and ascend a little further. Since your spirits are your allies, guides, or familiars they have been chosen by you or assigned to you to help you with your ascension. Spirits can have some odd methods of teaching which some may not catch on at first but, if they feel the magician needs to learn something further or expand their knowledge and abilities to effectively ascend further, but they feel you are not doing what is necessary or are unaware that you need to do something, they try to get your attention.

They can do this by ignoring you or not helping because it will get your attention sooner or later and you’re going to wonder what’s going on or did I do something to offend them? Okay so, now they have your attention! Here’s where you need to do, really take a step back and evaluate yourself. Ask yourself these questions and write them down if you desire, it can help some people if they make notes.

EVALUATE YOURSELF

@What types of magick do you currently know how to perform? (RHP, basic LHP, dragon, faerie, garden, baneful, gemstone, etc?)

@What types would you like to learn how to perform, but cannot yet do?

@What magickal skills do you currently possess, what can you do?

@And of those, what traits or skills are your strong points that you do with ease as if they come naturally? (tarot? love spells? hearing spirits? dragon magick? Think of everything related to magick, divination, spirit communication, psychism, etc. what can you do best?)

@Okay now, which of those learned abilities are you the worst at that you would love to improve on?

@How long have you been practicing magick? (truthfully! Not just how long you have been trying LHP or black magick methods, how long have you been using and studying magick all together including wicca or RHP)?

@Do you feel that, in the amount of months or years that you have been doing magick that you have learned enough? Like are your current abilities as strong as you think they should be as of now compared to the number of years you have been practicing, or have you been doing magick for like 11 years and still feel that you have barely surpurpassed the beginner levels and could do much to improve?

Sit down with a pen and paper and ask yourself those questions. Really evaluate yourself and where you currently stand from a magickal perspective. This will help you see if you feel like it’s time for a genuine change. If so, as I was saying earlier, it may be that the spirits you work with feel like you are ready to ascend further but maybe you are neglecting the things necessary for this change to happen because you are not aware? Many of us get so comfortable with our current skills that we don’t even think about ascension because we feel, eh I have everything I need I right so I am content.

So sometimes spirits can ignore you because it’s most the effective way to gain your attention, especially if your astral senses are not yet fully developed and you still have a hard time seeing or hearing them, so if they cannot just speak to you directly because you may not hear them, they will attempt other methods to get your attention. Okay so, they have your attention now. And if this is truly the case which I think it may be as both of you (Salpinx and Blazewind) seem to be rational and levelheaded, you don’t seem like the type to have angered the spirits, then what you need to do is figure out what the next steps are for your ascension.

The spirits are testing you. Strange ways I know, but this is there way of forcing you to overcome your current hurdles because they see something in you that you have not yet realized. They see further potential and they know you dislike the feeling of them ignoring your requests, so they know if you are truly serious you will do everything it takes to find out why and gain back the communication and effectiveness you had with them before. Because the real test here is to get you to figure out what needs to be done, because until such time that you have figured it out, they will continue to do this.

So evaluate yourself, do some divination, read some posts and articles, and try to figure out what you can do to jump over this next hurdle. I would suggest also, see if you can find a nice calming meditation that is meant for helping you discover yourself and unveiling the next steps on your current path. Go into a deep theta before meditating and see what images come your way, see what spirits you meet while in trance and ask them to guide you, ask them many questions! If you cannot remember things from dreams or meditation well, keep a recording device on hand while you meditate so you can take verbal reminder notes. If you try to open your eyes and take written notes, you will lose your visual and become too alert.

I have been challenged like this before by one particular entity but I didn’t have any magickal failures because this entity, wouldn’t even talk to me at all in order to hear any requests. But the other entities were still helping me, it was just one in particular that was trying to get my attention. He was trying to tell me to step up my game. I thought for quite a few months, that he was pissed at me and I was in for a wild ride if I had angered this particular spirit, but all along he was just challenging me and testing me, forcing me to ascend. I could not even communicate with spirts at that time other than emotionally and intuitively, but I could not hear or see them so I had to overcome that hurdle in order to be able to see him and understand him when I asked “are you upset with me?”. He very calming and honestly said “No, but it took you too long to learn how to see and hear me! You are a procrastinator. You need to stay on focus.”

But now that I can communicate with him with ease, he no longer feels the need to ignore me and scare the hell out of me by making me think I had angered one of the most powerful demonic entities out there and was gonna have hell to pay for it LOL. Now, he just shows me very intense visuals and speaks to me in my mind. But this sounds like an ascension hurdle to me which means if you do the work necessary to overcome this, you will gain something much greater once these hurdles have been knocked over.

RavensAscent, you might be onto something. There’s a good chance that this has something to do with my ascension. I notice that the dwindling results happen with the spirits I’ve known the longest. It’s been suggested that perhaps they believe that they’ve imparted what knowledge or assistance that they could for me, and now they want me to move on to other spirits that can take things from here. I’m not altogether certain if this is the case for me. Since I have a harder and harder time getting in touch with these particular spirits, I can’t easily confirm this with them. Still, I maintain that this is a possibility.

The thing is, I don’t know if I want to move on. :frowning:

Some of these spirits are among the first I’d ever called upon in my budding magician’s experience. I regard them like a beloved childhood friend, teddy bear or security blanket. My sentimentality makes it difficult for me to think that I’ve outgrown the reason for their presence in my life, and now it’s time for us to part. :frowning:

I have an essay-length theory on this that links The Kybalion, in which the higher laws trump the lower, dynamism, and entropy, but the short version while I try and make the long into something readable (don’t hold your breath!) is that RavensAscent’s advice is entirely correct - keep pushing, and focus on ascent and not just outcomes.

That draws the higher law of ascent in, and basically overcomes the nibbling fishes of entropy, which in magick expresses as reality immunising itself against acts of will, to instead produce to more of the same old, same old, when it gets used to your will being applied by the same person, spirit, and method.

This (IMO) is also why repeat readings on the same situation often get less and less accurate. Possibly also why people have patchy results using books like NAP in some situations - but that’s kind of another topic.

I discovered this phenomenon of diminishing results when using various methods to manifest stuff and it’s one of my main interests right now, as is what I call entropic drift - the reason no reading can ever claim to be 100% accurate.

I’m going to nail it, and share what I can whenever I can, but it might not be soon. :slight_smile:

This is not only common, but a very interesting thread and I do hope that between us, we can sort out this age old problem that will no doubt occur time and time again…

Just to clarify the question then : " Why is it that the more I use the same spirit or the more I ask for the same request, the less effective it becomes?"

Have you ever noticed in life that when we try something new our minds are ‘open to it’ because we want it to work so much, we therefore make it work through our own open minded belief to it, not to mention that fresh urge of inspiration and momentum we have to do whatever it takes ourselves?

The more we use this same source however, the more we rely on it too much, and therefore the more it tends to become a crutch to lean on which will eventually take away our belief in our abilities to do the job successfully ourselves?

Spirits taught me this same procedure through invokation as it involves mind control compared to evokation, which is mainly involved in influencing the outside world instead. True invocation prompts the magician to learn and develop the skills himself so he doesn’t become totally reliant on the spirit, and then he can benefit better from further invocations in the future. This way, the spirit teaches you what he knows so you can do it yourself after a-little more guidance. I hope this makes sense to you Blazewind Bluebird and comes into alignment with your recent dilemma

I think you were getting more of a sense of your inner power because this is what the spirit wants you to do, he wants you to take control and you may not be ready just yet, which can cause the breakdown in momentum and therefore, results can become nonexistent.

To give you a more practical situation regarding this, I knew a guitarist who practiced the black arts himself and he would try to get spirits to make him play better. He got to the stage where he became possessed by ‘Pan’ who is a God connected with music. Pan taught him how to practice and how to improvise thereby not getting stuck in a rut trying to copy other peoples music all the time (which is what he was doing). He took the advice and put all this into practice without asking or relying on Pan anymore…the result was, he became a far better musician because of it.

I think many spirits especially demons love to get involved in our lives, and can show us how to eventually help ourselves and this is part of their payment for helping us. They reap the beauty of our success and feed of the energy we place into it. I think we must however learn to inevitably take control and wield the mighty sword without any assistance. Constantly asking for the same things or using the same spirit in a similar situation can definitely go against this natural current of life.

Just found a great description of entropy and its relationship to probability:

Similarly, if you put a drop of cream into your coffee, the cream will spread throughout the entire cup, because that's a state of higher entropy. There are more ways to arrange the bits of cream throughout your coffee than there are for the cream to remain in one small region.

Entropy, according to Boltzmann, is about what’s probable. Objects with low entropy are tidy, and therefore unlikely to exist. High-entropy objects are untidy, which makes them likely to exist. Entropy always increases, because it’s much easier for things to be untidy.

Source: http://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20150309-why-does-time-only-run-forwards

So, events taking the path of ONLY the will of one person is “tidy, and therefore unlikely to exist” whereas events taking the path dictated by multiple forces and observers is “untidy, which makes them likely to exist.”

That’s what I was getting at, above, and screening forces which increase entropy (which in my UPG is what things like the UC can do - just like if you add the cream to your coffee, but only by keeping it inside the bowl of a teaspoon) is central to magick, as is overcoming it by use of higher laws and not repeating too much. It’s a work in progress though!

This isn’t a reply to Savodonger’s post, more an expansion on my own idea - in any event all replies so far also address the problem, I’m just making more of a theoretical case about it. :slight_smile:

This is a little off topic Eva but heres another example of energy working as negative entropy…

Two football matches clash at the same time? The team in the premier league whose been given the most support and admiration (energy) over the years will tend to take the attention (energy) away from the school team playing down the road.

Continuing this further, let’s now say that ‘dad’ is under some moralistic obligation to go and watch his son play for the school team but deep down, he would rather be up the road watching the big match. Infact, his mind could become so infested with what’s happening in the big match that he loses all interest in the school team finals.

This practical example shows how two entitys of the same nature work by allowing the one with more energy to drain the other with less? Negative entropy

Dont freak Blaze. Magical progress doesnt seem to work in a linear formula like weight lifting or studying. The logical mind would think that the more you do something the better you get at it, and that someone who preforms 2 pathworkings a month and meditates every day would “gain” “power” at an exponentionally faster rate than say someone who opens 2 sigils and stays open to magical inspiration etc in that same time frame.

Self-betterment, Self-awareness, and dealing with certain life challenges in a more self actualized way are the real barometers of success. If for example one used to be afraid of confrontation and would become physically ill or manifest tremors when nervous, but after some time working with Belial finds that they can now speak confidentally and calmly under duress than they have made major improvements and have molded themselves into the type of person they seek to become through magic. Isnt that becoming a living God?

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I have little time on hand and a little lazy to type right now but I will link this video on Taoist Magic. This guy may not be your cup of tea but maybe you can learn something from this video. Other videos to explain further his Taoist system and style of magic from a different angle can be found on his YouTube channel Chiinnature. He even talks about utilizing video games, paintball, and airsoft guns as ritual tools in his style of magic. And just like Charles “Uncle Chuckie” Cosimano he too utilizes the Flashlight method for ghost busting/hunting. He has a lot of videos, so good luck.

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This has turned into a really interesting thread. Blazewind, have you gone over the posts here thoroughly and given any consideration to what was said? In other words, are you making any progress towards figuring out what was wrong?

I just went back over the earlier posts from this thread and read the newest ones as well and I feel like I can relate to this thread again. A week or so ago I was talking to King Paimon and he was not answering me. As I said on another thread here, he is not big on chit-chatting about general things, he is very focused and dedicated to the occult and educating magicians and if the topic strays from that too severly, it’s not unusual for him to ignore you a bit so I thought, oh yeah I’m straying off topic here and thinking too much about mundane worries, he’s not interested in this. He was literally giving me that look like “Goddamnit, do women ever shut up?”

So I apologized for going off track and started talking about one of my newest ascension goals only to find he was still ignoring me somewhat. This time he was actually paying attention to what I was saying but was not really answering me. I knew I had not said anything to anger him but I was so focused on the topic I looked up and realized I could no longer see him so I said, are you still here, because I can feel you but I cannot see you anymore? He replied, yes, still here. I said, why are not answering me still because I realized I was rambling off topic and I changed back to the original conversation. I don’t see a problem with the questions I just asked you.

He said: “The answers to the questions you ask can be found from within yourself. Calm down, relax yourself and do some inner soul searching and there you will find the answers you seek.”

I said, so you want me to meditate on it and let the answers come to me instead of telling me yourself? I can do that, I’m just not sure what to look for within myself. I know you want me to further ascend and I am trying really hard here but at this point, I am kind of at a standstill and unsure of what to do. I mean I know some of what I need to do but am just unsure of how to get to that point.

He said: “Some hurdles can only be overcome by the magician when he silences his mind, steps back and attempts to view his current accomplishments from an outside perspective.” (he sometimes uses the word “he and his” to mean human kind in general, either male or female)

I said, so I need to re-evaluate myself and view my accomplishments from a different perspective, like an onlooker in a different body looking at myself instead of seeing things from my own eyes? I’m confused. I’m sorry I really want to understand this but my mind is drawing a blank right now.

He said: “You are over thinking what has been said. It’s not as difficult as it sounds. Quiet your racing thoughts and the answers you seek will come to you when the time is right. Again, relax!” (in a somewhat thundering and overbearing voice this time)

So I still pondered on what he said, trying to relax but my damn brain would not shut off. I had like a million thoughts going at once, the A/D/D jitters I guess. So finally I got tired of all the restlessness and got super high that evening to calm down. Not super high like, out of control, stumbling around, slurring my speech and acting stupid. NOT that kind of high. I had some DXM which calms me, quiets my thoughts, and induces an extreme state of euphoria, happiness, serenity, the visions I see normally are much more clear and colorful when they come thru and it activates ALL of my astral senses at once, and spirit communication for me is as easy as talking to a human in the same room where normally while sober, the type of communication I experience changes from hearing the spirit talk, then his next few sentences come as forced thoughts, then I can see him and see his lips moving but the words don’t come thru until 3 minutes later. But on DXM, I can see them, hear their voices, and connect with the spirits telepathically all at once.

So here I am nice and comfy, feeling relaxed, and all of a sudden it dawns on me exactly what I needed to do to overcome my current road block and ascend further. I am not having magickal troubles, everything is working just fine for me in fact Lately, everytime something annoying or undesired almost happens to me I think in my mind damn I hope this works out for me and suddenly the undesired thing that was going to happen, does NOT happen and it ends up flipping around and I gain something from it. Like I didn’t have a lot of money last week and still had 2 days before my next payday but I needed smokes and I did not have enough money to buy enough to last me until I got paid ao I was going to just buy one pack and try my damndest to get by using my e-vape thing which is just not as fulfilling as a real cig but suddenly, my smokes rang up for 40 cents for a pack that was normally $5.84 so I was able to get 3 packs.

But my problem was that, I have had 4 people on this forum do readings for me lately or tell me they had a vision about me, and all 4 of them said something like, you need to get focused, ignore facebook, youtube, and your blog for a few days and focus on yourself because your next big step up in your ascension is due now, so ignore all those things and take the necessary actions to make this happen. Or they said, certain gods were urging me to ascend further but I was not paying attention because I was too focused on helping other people that I was forgetting to help myself too. Then even King Paimon told me I was focusing on too many things at once to the point I was ignoring my own needs and goals to help others. I enjoy helping people, I really do especially if it involves the occult but I finally took everyone’s advice and chilled the fuck out. I knew I definitely needed to relax and take a break when King Paimon started telling me to chill out too. LOL

I mean, 4 people on here plus one spirit telling me the same thing. That was not a coincidence to ignore so I am currently doing what I need to do to evolve further. I thought the answers I needed would never come to me and I would be stuck at my current level but apparently, when you have racing thoughts and too many projects going on at once, your mind can become way more preoccupied than you might imagine and it forms a wall cloud in your mind making it impossible to hear what the spirits are trying to tell you. I probably had multiple spirits telling me what I needed to do all along but I couldn’t hear it because I was so ADD-ish last month and distracted as hell.

Blazewind, Maybe you could try everything in your power to empty your mind and take some alone “you” time and the answers will come to you as well. I have learned that the more you keep seekign after the answers to your hurdles, the more they run away and say “ha ha, you can’t catch me bitch!” But when you finally say fuck it and stop chasing after the answers, then next time you are truly relaxed and at ease, the answers come when you least expect it and for me, they tend to hit me like lightning bolts like the cartoons where a lightbulb suddenly glows over someones head and they say Aha! I figured it out! So give that a try. I’m telling you meditation works wonders for things like this but it’s so under-estimated that people think nah, that’s too simple. Yeah, meditation may seem too simple to solve your problems but I can say it has helped me in some amazing and very unexpected ways.

I have gone over and thought over everything posted in here. I’ve been thinking all this over for a while now, and gaining some interesting understanding on it all. One thing that’s occurred to me again and again is that the surprising and undeniable successes I have had, have pretty much all been the result of tried in the moment acts of desperation with an attitude of both “nothing to lose,” and “failing is not a possibility right now.” I’ve been getting more and more interested in ritual, in practice and in the concept of a working system, a “right way” of doing things. I do feel of course that these things have their great benefit and show discipline. But then it seems also that I tend to get further without a system, without the planning and thinking. Thinking perhaps leads to overthinking, and in overthinking I give myself an out, permission to fail? Maybe I need to find a way to bring that sense of “failing is not an option.” into a planned working? Something to think about for sure.

In my opinion, I think we pass through 3 stages that constantly is in loop when it comes to magic development:

  • Heightened awareness
    This is common when something new comes in our way, a spiritual force that we acknowledge directly, feel strongly and what power that entity inhabits. And with that heightened awareness, we often feel the changes it can make to us.

  • Getting accustomed
    Similar to alcohol or cigarettes, the more we use it, the less we feel the intoxication of the first time. Even if you feel that your magical path is on a “hiatus”, it can be just as strong and potent as it was in the beginning. The difference is that you are used to it now and maybe at some point took it for “granted”.

  • Doubts
    Like that first time with the heightened awareness, we want more of it and when that doesn’t happen - at least we think so - we’re getting doubts about our capabilities. This doesn’t have to be crucial in any way, because sometimes it’s not our choice to decide when we need to raise the ladder to the next stage of development. When we finally are ready again, we’re back at stage 1 again.

As I see it, it’s a cycle that repeat itself when we are ready, which doesn’t always have to be whenever we think we are ready. I, personally, think it’s better to value what you experienced so far, and work with that instead of doubting the lack of new experiences or development.

I’ve been warned by several spirits NOT to be overly elaborate with some pieces of work I have going on, because that places conditions on the working, each condition has a kind of “pass/fail” element, and therefore gives it a chance to feel like a failure even before it’s enacted.

I view magick as like being a cattleman in the old days, with a herd of rampaging steer, all headstrong but also not especially clever.

The direction they want to go in, is “the natural order of things” - the outcome that has the highest probability, for example the herd taking the shortest route down the valley to where there’s water and grass.

For that reason I call outcomes with no magick applied, the “probablistic outcome.”

I, as the cattleman, want to enact my single human will on this herd of different things, so I use my cowboy skillz :slight_smile: and get them all moving the way i want, into the corral for example, and this is the “willed outcome.”

There’s a very low probability that the cattle would naturally move away from the valley and into the corral, this is very similar to the concept of entropy.

The purpose of magick is to screen the forces that would give the outcome with the highest probability, and which has high levels of entropy, to make events go in an unlikely direction instead - you get that awesome job you’re not really technically qualified for, your ex comes back, you win large sums at the horse race, etc.

All highly improbable, all possible, and all attainable (with lesser or higher degrees of diffculy) with magick.

Adding elaborate conditions into magick, UNLESS you have them firmly fixed in your mind NOT as hurdles to be leapt over, but absolute guarantors of success, is like not only herding the cattle into a corral, but also asking them to march in step whilst entering single file.

The odds of controlling an apparently random set of forces (or cattle) with that specific precision are very low, therefore, it’s more likely to fail altogether than if you just herd 'em up any way that gets the job done.

Hmmn, that was embarrassingly rambly (also, magicians as Kozmik Kowboys? Yeah right!) but anyway, that’s my current understanding of it.

Be very specific about the desired outcome, but as open as possible towards any route that will deliver it, which includes not making elaborate rits which may close off other possible routes for it to be delivered.

ALL JMO and ALL a work in progress. :smiley:


Yee-haw!

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