Hidden Names of Gensis Journal

[Dralukmun]

Observations

Overall, I was pretty mellow for the day, even when forced to attend an extra meeting as another addition to my work duties. I noticed that I was able to better observe body language and figure out emotions, ambitions, etc and how it correspondence to their behavior. I also was more knowledgeable with myself to curve my own ambition so I am considering much more than just the money. I don’t need to chase every opportunity if I can see the cost being greater than the reward. It doesn’t mean I won’t pursue one’s were the reward is great and that I will avoid every cost, but after days of going into the meat grinder magically, I am a bit wiser with my choices on a personal note.

Yeah, this symbol is great for insight and revealing truths.

[Dralukmun]

Overview of The Fourth Name

This one was a tough name for me. O was constantly put into an emotional Flux, mostly anger, to understand it. Emotions may be a temporary state, much like life in general, but it is not easy to really understand what they are trying to speak. It seems to be something (or at least for me) that one usually does not want to hear, but needs to. It is not always going to be peaceful, nor will it always be chaotic. It is something that one may need to be aware of before using this name as they proceed. One way or other, truths about yourself will be revealed.

[Dralukmun]

Name Five Day One

Moving right on to the next name, this one focuses on the Social aspect of life according to Baal Kadmon. I have the next couple nights off so its effecfs will likely not be as obvious right away as I will not be dealing with as many people, but lets see.

As I have done with the previous names, I wrote the name on my left hand and took a few breathes to help relax my body. I visualized the name beginning to glow as I chanted the name (YAH-RE) focusing on understanding it. The letters shifted into a yellow orb as I chanted, growing to engulf my hand as I chanted. Slowly, it engulfed my entire body as I breathed in and chanted with my exhale. I continued this until it covered my entire body, as if I was in the center of a sun. I visualized the letters appearing before me as I said the name one more time and released.

While I was pretty relaxed beforehand, I do feel good afterwards. A little confident and more of a spring in my step. I can see this feeling alone being useful before facing challenges or meeting new people. But we will see how the day goes.

[Dralukmun]

Observations

I wanted to give this a couple days to observe the effects. While I am open to talk about things such as spirituality, religion, philosophy and crafts openly, there are some things in my personal life I am not. It took a long time for me to get comfortable talking about my past tramuas with others who actually wanted to know me (not that those moments define me, they were just chapters of course). There are topics I still struggle with, mainly revolving very intimate topics even among the sanctuary of my own home. Well, since I first worked with this name, those exact topics were once again brought up and I was forced to talk about them due to the situation. That being said, it was much easier than it normally is.

I have noticed that the strong desire to withdraw from people in general has diminished as well. Coming from someone who pretty much socially isolated themselves for a couple years, that is something worth noting. The state of things and how I have observed people behave has not really been encouraging social interactions as of late.

[Dralukmun]

Name Five Day Two

Same ritual as before, although there was a difference in the visual. Instead of a sphere forming around my hand that engulfed my body, I saw the letters form in front of me from the Golden energy. At one point as I was chantinging, another form of light pierced into the letters, magnifying the light behind released from them. My vision was engulfed with the golden energy as I felt something rip through me, taking something away. Not quite sure what to make of it, although I feel a bit more tired now (although I am running on three hours of sleep). I’ll be at work tonight so let’s see what the results will be

[Dralukmun]

Observations

Well, communicatiom was very business like today. Of course, I dealt with the usual complaints that come with the job but nothing beyond like it usually goes on start up. I did have multiple people ask if I was okay and one person describing the atmosphere around me being as tense as the air before a storm is, even while I was mostly calm. Not quite the reaction I was hoping for, but it seems to have worked for the given situation.

That being said, i was a little sharper than I meant to with a particular topic revolving politics than I intended. Without going into detail, I am not sure if any form of magic will ever soften my tongue with that topic. I understand the interest but it is a boundary line I make very clear to those interested in interacting with me.

[Dralukmun]

Name Fove Day Three

Same ritual, but rereading the last lines in my observation, I decided to put this name to the task of addressing my reactions to that one topic. While it is perfectly fine to have boundaries, it is not good for me to go off the handle when people forget it while expressing their worry/interest. When the letters of the name appeared in front of me, I allowed every political term and names of politicians I could think of that draws emotion behind them. I focused on the threads of emotion flowing between me and them and began to severe them one by one. As I visualized the thread snapping, I inhaled deeply, visualizing that I was drawing back all the energy of emotions I have wasted on them. When I was done, I “pushed” each term/name away, banishing each away. I took some time to continue chanting the fifth name and slowly eased myself out of the trance.

Feeling a bit lighter now.

[Dralukmun]

Observations

Well, the topic I was focused on during the last ritual did not brought up so I cannot really speak on the effects of that. However, I am noticing that while the effects of the last symbol combining the previous names brought the truth out both the individual and others, this one puts the individual on the spot. In my case, it was the question on why I hold onto more…“traditional” values such as honor while rejecting a majority of systems that normally teach/encourage them such as religion and all political parties. This question came from my wife, who not only supports but challenges my work for the sake of growth, as she knows it ultimately helps me, even when I rather take an easier route. She went down right down the root to the question by asking me why I decided to take the easier route that many take (which would be staying in the religion my family introduced me to when I was ten) for a more difficult one. There was an additional question of when I lost hope. It is something that haunted my mind all night as everything at work went down, forcing me to dwell on it.

In general, I focus on power in my discussion, both here and in real life. Morality and ethics is just a topic I avoid in general, as people seem to pick up on my behavior and I have never wanted to create an illusion that I know everything or that I am somehow more “pure” or “righteous”. Gods forbid that is the furthest from the truth. I have my lines, but not everything I do would be considered ethical. I remember the days being lectured by the family pastor on why it was not okay to rip off crosses of fellow followers for how they treated others. Honestly, I found more wisdom with ethics and how to treat people well while maintaining boundaries from the outcasts of multiple faiths and social groups (I owe an old cook who immigrated from Baghdad a great deal on the value of hard work and how to have pride what you do even when struggling to make ends meet, as well as how to make some kick ass hummus).

I will not go too deep into the story of my life, as that aspect is not really important here, but the answer to the question is that I hold some of those more traditional values because I have found them fruitful in application to my life, as opposed to believing they are good because someone said so. They certainly are not perfect nor are they easy to follow. But they are rewarding to my spirit, even though ultimately it is only a small fraction of the reason why I keep to them. Like it or not, I am a teacher to those who are involved in my life, just like many of us are. It is not something I can run away from. So, if I am going to have people observe me, I might as well be an example of an option, as I value the freedom for the individual to make the choice for themselves more than even my own honor. In a way, it is a reflection of those who taught me an option of how to approach life.

And in a way, remembering that has restored a bit of hope in me as well. May not be the “correct” way and it certainly is not for everyone, but it is enough for me. That is it for this observation. We will be leaving ethics and morality out for this point on as it is not something important as far this working goes. But these thoughts (as well as the openness to sharing them) seem to an effect of this working and i have to be honest with it. Shadow working and self reflection stems out of manh practices, including the ones you least expect them to.

[Dralukmun]

Name Five Day Four Yichumid Exercise

For this session, I wrote the First Name on my left palm and the Fifth on my right. I found myself falling into a meditative state upon writing the letters, as they seem to have became a trigger. I have also memorized their pronunciation, as chanting each to activate them became as easy as breathing. The intention was to understand the connection between the All and human social networks. Without any effort, I could see the letters of both materialize before me via visualization and watched their union.

The imagery was brief scences but they all revolved around a common theme. The first was watching the explosive power of a carpet bombing in slow motion, how each smaller explosion joined with each other to become an inferno. The second was watching multiple pebbles dropping into a body of water, each ripple bouncing off eachother to create a stronger wave. The third was watching an exchange of gifts, small gestures individually, but how they lifted the mood of a people as gifts passed hands. Ultimately, the overall message seems to be that bigger phenomenon is created through smaller actions. How this answers my question is beyond me at the moment, as I am a bit sleep deprived, but I’ll give it some more thought.

[Dralukmun]

Name Five Day Five Yichumid Exercise

This felt necessary today as I have been subject to an increase of people looking to me for my aid with social situations. At the same time, I am dealing with my own exhaustion from those social interactions. I thought my vacation would help me rest a bit but I realize that I am a leader both at home, at work and the few social circles outside of it. There is no real rest when it comes to that physically, but it does not mean there are not other means.

Anyways, I repeated the same exercise as the last one, shifting my focus to be able to handle those situations and still maintain myself. As I activated the First Name, I drew anstream of energy coming from the letters and manipulate it to move from the base of my spine and up my body, filling the body with energy. As I activated the fifth, I drew another stream from the letters in that name and attached it to my throat, acting as a focal point as I allowed the energy from the first to flow up and out of my head, drawing it back down to my spine to form a circuit. I pushed the energy through the circuit multiple times and formed a sphere around my body with some of the energy released.

As the sphere formed, I visualized the two names forming in front of me and allowed them to combine, releasing the energy around me and finalizing my intention. A brief imagery of a path forming came to mind.

Feeling a bit more awake now but relaxed.

[Dralukmun]

Name Five Day Six Yichumid Exercise

I am feeling rested today, so repeated the same ritual as yesterday, working on that circuit I created last time. The energy was easier to move in general and as I manipulated the energy running to and from my body, my mind started to wander towards why I was exhausted in the first place. Ulimately, my exhaustion comes from constantly repeating myself. No matter how a social situation is approached to me, it seems to boil down to one of three things. I am no saint and have done these things too.

The first is that people like to batch and gossip out of boredom. The second is that people get mad that the world does not fit their ideals and, in the best case scenario, will talk up a storm to express their fustrations. The third is that some people for some reason think it is somehow disgraceful to not know about something and therefore tend to make assumptions, which lead to conflicts (as well as assuming that another person knows as much as you do). This often seems to come from the loud ones typically, which is why I have more of a pull getting to know the quiet individuals, especially if I notice they are observing.

I am not saying there are not things worth discussing, as there certainly is, but thinking in terms of being a leader, it is not one person’s job to solve every problem of the world. If anything, I think I will be approaching social issues others come to me for by helping them think if it is one of the three things I noted as opposed to an actual problem and if it is a problem, help weigh in pros and cons of the options we come up, letting the individual make the decision themselves. The world is a little too heavy for me to lift for those who look to me as a leader, and I am doing a disservice to myself and others by trying to carry that weight. Better to teach someone how to fish than give them one.

[Dralukmun]

Name Five Day Seven Ritual

Okay, following the trend I have set, I created a symbol using the five names I have used so far. Not going to lie, this time it was a pain in the ass. I went through about twelve pieces of paper drawing out designs for it. I actually delayed this for a day because I did not feel what I drew was complete based on how I have come to understand the Names and their relationship with each other. As the author described this, each name addresses a certain aspect of life. But how do these aspects intertwine with eachother to create our reality?

The first name deals with the spiritual. Ultimately, this is to connect with the “All” according to the book, but that seems incomplete. It certainly can, but at its base, it seems to help connect to one’s own soul. This seems to be why the first name of HGN behaves differently than the first part of the 42 letter name of god. With the 42 Letter Name, the first part calls the external source for protection. In essence, you are pulling the all into or around yourself. While you can with the first name of HNG, there is a sense of “pushing out” energy wise as well, leading me to believe that its power relies more on the individual soul than the All. This thought seems to justify the idea of using the first name as the base, although external in the symbol as it seems to, at times, have its own consciousness that we may not always realize, as I believe the soul is made of parts that are essentially their own entities as opposed to one (the is upg on my end so take it as you will).

The Second, Third, and Fourth Names all deal with aspects of the internal (the body, the mind and the heart). While these conditions can definitely effect how one reacts to the external, all the change starts within and interplay with eachother. If you are mentally over stressed or going through a rough patch emotionally, it will effect your body. If you are physically in pain constantly, it will eventually effect your emotions and your mind. So, it seemed appropriate to put them inside the symbol.

Finally, the fifth name (social) is where we begin to push outwards into the external. There is still an internal factor, as I noticed an inner calm upon using it, but ultimately we are using it to effect how we come across to others, as well as how much energy we spend on it. For this reason I felt it appropriate to put it outside of the symbol.

So, after a prayer to set the mood, I began by drawing a circle. On the bottom of it, I wrote out the Hebrew for the first name (BA-PA) and activated it by chanting, watching a bluish white energy coming from my chest and flow onto the paper, beginning to form the circle through visualization. Within that circle, I drew a triangle and divided it into three parts. On the base, I wrote the second name (RA-NAR) and activated it, “seeing” it realize a red energy begin to form the smaller triangle. I wrote the Third Name on the left (EYE-VA) and activated it, visualizing a yellow light released and forming the smaller triangle. I wrote the fourth name on the right (SHAT-EYE) and activated it, visualizing a deep blue light released and form that triangle. At this point, I took a minute to watch the energy flow and intermingle with eachother.

Finally, I wrote the fifth name on top, activating it. I watched the energy being built start to flow out towards that name, turning golden. The energy began to start forming a circle around the symbol, looping back to the first and flowing through as a circuit. I stated my intention of becoming balanced and communicating clearly as I released.

Here is the symbol I created:

[Dralukmun]

Observations

Well, communication did improve and I was fairly balanced overall. Rough patches of course and there were still individuals who I was not able to reach, but they have a reputation of being hot tempered in general. I have noticed that anger of a target can do two things when it interacts with magic. The first is that it can act like a shield from direct influence, so throwing energy directly at them is pretty much the equivalent to throwing gasoline on a fire. Not going to work very well. However, it does blind the individual from indirect influence, such as focusing your energy on manifesting obstacles for the purpose of wearing them down. When someone is in a blind rage, it can be difficult for them to gauge how much energy to expend which tends to lead to exhaustion, or even the breaking of will if the individual working against them thinks enough steps ahead. While material can get sharper the more it is ground to a point, at some point it will break eventually. It is easier to deal with an enemy while they are calm magic wise, but in the moment, an indirect approach is useful if they have already passed the anger moment. This particular working was not focused on addressing that but it was something I observed last night so I thought worth mentioning.

Even while dealing with those individuals, I was able to handle the usual stress and keep myself stable even while working a position I have come to realize I really do not enjoy. Too much cost and not enough reward ultimately. I have noticed that there has been an improvement on making decisions in general with my last workings, which could be a result of the “tuning” effect this pathworking has seemed to have been illustrating. I will be reactivating the symbol tonight and see if I get similiar results.

[Dralukmun]

Observations

So, I have been held up from reactivating the symbol as I have been quite busy managing things. From the time I wake up to when I eventually pass out, I seem to be either be consulting or commanding while doing work myself to get things done. I have not even had five minutes of my own time to do things like meditation, which tells me I need to do some serious time block scheduling. I am tired from doing all this, but I seem to be keeping pace. However, the time blocks would help to prevent burn out.

I’ve also had some time to observe a couple things. The first is the serious problem of worrying about offending a being, whether human or spirit. For example, someone in my area was worried about approaching Lilith because they are not Jewish, nor willing to convert. This is something that has been discussed here on the forum and I am not surprised to see it come up outside of it. They were concerned about this issue due to something they read on reddit or Facebook (cannot remember which, as I find both toxic personally and do not bother remembering the name).

Anyways, after taking some time to make them some chamomile tea to calm down a bit, i started by asking this question “who are you trying to show respect to?” When they answered Lilith, I then asked if it is fair to take away the freedom of accepting or rejecting them from her by making assumptions through a system that was meant to serve man, not spirits. I advised him to put aside the human bs and actually try to work with developing senses as well as Lilith to see what comes up. Seems to have given him a bit of peace.

The second observation is the disconnect between what I stand for and what I actually do. I say I do not stand for unnecessary suffering (I define “necessary” suffering as discomfort needed to promote change or actual harm against someone else who has already gone out of their way to promote serious harm) yet I am a part of a system where members are constantly suffering for mediocre rewards through a paycheck. It is something that has bothered me for a long time but have put in the “It is just work” part of my brain. This working is not allowing me to have that separation anymore. I cannot just throw it into the corner where it is hidden and call it good, it is something I have to figure out. You can say this symbol is an anti-hypocrisy tool, at least for me. It brings to the surface what is ignored, as it will effect the layers it is trying to balance in the individual, even if it is uncomfortable to face. Good old shadow work.

[Dralukmun]

Name Five Day Eight Ritual

So, I squeezed some time to reactivate this symbol before work. I pretty much repeated the ritual, this time actually retracing it physically as I activated each name. Strangely, the actual energy was quite subtle. There was a sensation of something pulling things in my chest, not necessarily removing anything but rearranging up until the point I released. Not quite sure what to make of that but we will go with it and see what happens

[Dralukmun]

Observation

Fairly balanced throughout the night. Had to deal with an individual who has been causing problems for awhile now. Unfortunately, they crossed one of my three lines, so I am now conducting a curse on them along with the mundane means within my power with rank at work. While I allowed the anger to flow to feed the curse, I was not out of control nor am I questioning my decision. It is pure, cold logic at this point, the most basic of human social interactions: pick a fight, and you will recieve one.

But this concludes my experiments with this symbol and well as this name. It brings up brutally honest issues within the self, but it does help with decision making when others are involved. It also shows who on your side, and who are not.

[Dralukmun]

Overview of Fifth Name

Like the other names, this name is like a tuning tool for this aspect of life. It reveals both strengths and weaknesses that can be observed for improvement. While it does cause an internal shift, it seems to focus more outwardly. In combination with the fourth name, I can see this being particularly helpful for individuals who are shy. The fourth name helps to overcome the emotional side where the fifth will help with practice by attracting the attention of others.

I also can see the same combination being useful for more harmful intentions for a target with anger issues, as it could be used to draw out those emotions to shatter their social standing. This is something I will have to experiment with, but the idea that comes to mind is visualizing the names repeating to form a chain around the target and imagining them strangling them as the names are activating. Just a thought.

I will be moving on to the final name of this working, which will focus on the financial side of life. This should be a bit easier to measure than the others

[Dralukmun]

Name Six Day One Ritual

I began by writing the Hebrew ketters of this name (TOW-AH) and sat down with them in front of me. Take a few deep breathes, I gazed at the letters and began to chant the name, seeing them slowly glow a golden light. I continued to build the energy by chanting and allowed the visual to unfold, which came in the form of the name being rewritten in repeat, forming a circle around my body. It did not come close enough to feel binding, but hovered there in front of me as I chanted. I stated my intention of bring the funds I need for a specific item at the moment, allowing my energy to pull the aid towards me. I finalized the intention and released.

Once again, feeling at peace and shall see what results are brought.

[Dralukmun]

Observation

Well, that was quick. I had an extra $25 in my bank account I did not have before the ritual. Just enough to get some cat food I needed, as I was running low and my check was shorted. May not seem like much, but it was exactly what I needed and my cats’ bowls did not run empty.

So, it worked for bringing in money when the intention for it is not for yourself. I will have to further experiment to see if that is always the case, but it is only day one.

[DarkestKnight]

That’s awesome! Can’t have starving kittehs in your house