Heartbreak Problems

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:08pm

I want to

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:08pm

Am I sane? Is this real?

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:09pm

I can’t tell if I feel nothing or everything

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:12pm

It’s calm.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:16pm

I was just smiling. Did I break? I left the room.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:19pm

Gabrielle is weird. Maybe it’s the same issue. She wasn’t expecting this. “You’re hurt. You’re just hurt and you’re starting to lose it. I think you need some sleep.”

That’s weird.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:21pm

I don’t know what to trust. I’ve lost so much. I don’t know why I’m feeling like this or who I am and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. When I was sound of mind I was told it would all work out in a day, one day, and it was approaching. I feel calm. I know it’s numb. Im gonna wake up and feel so much pain. Is it today? Is it tomorrow? Is it now? Will this numbness last forever? What do I do?

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:24pm

Please save me. For fucks sake, is there some spell or process I can use to be sure? Do I trust my instinct? Do I wait? Do I tell? Do I take his hand without a word? Or do I just end it. Do I take initiative and be my solution

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:26pm

The Moon says, “Don’t let your illusions blind you” but what is an illusion? Do I trust the incorporeal angel mom or do I trust what I can see? What can I trust? What do I stick to if nothing? Do I believe in blind hope, or can I not see the hope because the moon is blinding?

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:26pm

Is my illusion the illusion that I will see a judgement day?

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:27pm

Why am I so calm!? Why am I so content!? I feel it ever so lightly in my stomach, but my body has gone soft!

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:47pm

I want to die. I feel so trapped. Please what the fuck do I do

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:53pm

I’m in hell.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:56pm

Is there a way to destroy a soul?

To destroy the human soul would be and I hate to use this word but … “Impossible”.

There are a few reasons why.

If you have in depth knowledge about the human soul, you’ll understand it isn’t just a body of light or a astral body of energy.

The human soul is a very complicated organism, it is the compartmentalisation of the astral self, the Acasual self, the aethyric self, the mental self, the atman etc.

The human soul is basically what’s known as Atman, the best way to explain what atman is is the following.

It is the self which lyes beyond ego, beyond the samsaric self, beyond your identity.
Think of existence, it came from the source the nexus of all that is.

Think of the source like a sun the atman would then be a ray of the sun, that ray is basically a projection of the source into anthropomorphic form.

You still hold all the power that the source did, your soul is the microcosmic projection of the macrocosm.

Such a thing cannot be destroyed, since it is omnipresent, omniscient as well as omnipotent.
You cannot destroy that, you just cannot.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fucking hell fuck

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:57pm

I’m fucking STUCK HERE.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 1:59pm

TOday is going to be a good day. TOday is going to be a good day? Are you sure? Are you fucking positive? Are you? Who are you? Who are you to say what the day will be? Who am I to trust you? What the FUCK

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 3:13pm

What do I do? Wait? She says wait. Is that it? I want to ask, I really do, how it could possibly result in anything like how she described.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 3:18pm

I’ll wait this week out. This week they told me about. If it truly doesn’t happen by the end? I will legitimately consider plans to leave.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 3:20pm

Four days left.

Maxwell · February 24, 2020, 3:47pm

I feel like under different circumstances, I would see the moon in a more positive light. I am beginning to see it is not my enemy.