Depression don't let me practice magick and therapy/meds aren't helping

Health, Beauty & Shapeshifting
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Hello everyone. So basically i am in a very difficult moment in my life, in the last years i have been feeling difficulty to do simple everyday chores, literally anything like cooking, working, studying, even taking care of my personal hygiene. I feel fatigued and extremely unmotivated all the time. I did not know i was depressed all this time, i thought i was just lazy/procrastinating all this time, but it’s been getting worse to the point i have gotten diagnosed with severe depression, and it’s clear i am not mentally well because i’m so low in energy i literally can’t do almost anything.

The reason im creating this topic is that i need advice on what could i do magically to help myself, I’ve been considering hiring reiki healers, evocators to summon Raphael/Marbas to help healing me, or hiring someone to ask these spirits what do i should do and why i am living that way. I really need advice on what to do because my life is insufferable now and i really need a plan.

Another important detail is that i cant do any magick at all, i have been trying to do evocation, meditation, astral senses training, spells, etc, but im so fatigued and low motivated that i cant keep doing magick for more that a few days, even when i try my best, use all my inner strength and do my best. there’s nothing worse than keep trying to do your best but only receive guilt back

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Before hiring anyone to do magick on your behalf, I highly suggest you go see a doctor and try out some medication. I know a lot of the New Age and occult crowd frowns upon Big Pharma, but in all honesty, medication helps many many people who otherwise can’t function in life. Depression is generally caused by an imbalance of the chemicals in your brain and help to regulate them can sometimes be necessary. As someone who also has depression, medication has personally helped me, though I have since weaned myself off of it.

However, no one on this forum is a doctor or can play one on the internet, so please get professional medical advice first and foremost.

Magically speaking, I recommend using pathworking to call upon Raphael. It doesn’t require much effort beyond just relaxation and visualizing and is easier than evocation. I also like the House of Kel, Mercurial spirits said to be capable of healing any aspect of your existence.

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^^This. :100:

I would add expect it to take a while, you will need to learn and have patience. The reason being it will be necessary to try samples and report your honest facts on whether or not a particular one works well with you.

I started with imiprine, then prozac, then celexa, then Zoloft. That was where my internal happy place was found.

So it may or may not be the same process with you, a different medication I’m not on might work well with you.

Your psychiatrist should do a thorough assessment with you, and find the right dosage of the right medication for you.

Magick can wait. Your mental health should not wait.

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Sometimes lack of vitamin D, magnesium and other elements may cause fatigueness leading to depression so check your vitamin level by blood check and take appropriate vitamins if they are deficient.

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Besides what was recommended already, try using pore breathing to gather vital energy.

Start with 7 breaths.

That is supposed to give you the vitality of 7 average men.

Know as you breathe in your pores this way, that you are breathing in divine authority and power to restore your health.

If you don’t know how to pore breathe, do the middle pillar ritual to gather power and charge yourself up.

Those divine names are of higher astral vibrations anyway and that will help clear-out things like depression and low energy states and any astral beings attached to them.

Then use this energy to do a thorough banishing of all this negative energy around you. For example the lbrp, vibrating Sol which is solar energy, or vibrating the name of the spirit Emnasut a solar being that drives out all depression and negativity/negative spirits.)

After this, I recommend calling upon the earth elemental king Gob( pronounced Goh-buh) Aratron, and Auriel and ask for their help in restoring elemental balance within you, health, blessings and protection.

You don’t need any elaborate ritual to do this,( no robes, circles, or wands) just vibrate their names and then ask them to help restore your elemental balance and grant you ever greater health.

If you don’t know how to vibrate, it’s like this: take a deep breath in and then on the exhale, you vibrate the spirits name ex. For Gob, it would be Gooooooooh buuuuuuhhhhhh as you vibrate you also try to feel the whole atmosphere around you vibrate as well or if you are invoking there powers within yourself, then you feel it vibrate within your being instead.

This will help grant the proper astral frequency to draw them into your space or their powers within yourself.

Sit with these energies a bit, so they can soak into your astral body and see if you get any intuition about your situation.

After a bit, thank them for coming or aiding you.

Burn some sandalwood for their help or a white candle is good if you have it.

Always remember, you need to build up the energy before dispersing it into other things like ritual Magick or healing, otherwise you will take from your own reserves and it will make you more vulnerable/unhealthy.

That’s why you always start with gathering power somehow, so you are always working from a surplus, ESPECIALLY if you ever feel you need to do Magick if you don’t feel well already.

Afterwards, make sure to give the excess energy back to the universe by breathing out of your pores 7 breaths as well.

Good luck

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I would like to add on, that don’t just take these vitamins and minerals, DO check first, because I found out the hard way that you absolutely CAN overdose on ALL vitamins and minerals. I thought my constant fatigue was maybe due to low magnesium (I am also prone to Anemia and low iron levels so thought maybe I wasn’t absorbing other nutrients as well). Its hard to get doctors appointments for so long via the VA and I can’t afford out of pocket so I just ordered supplements without checking. Turns out, a lot of other things I take had magnesium in it, and after a few months, my body was having difficulty getting rid of the excess to the point of respiratory attacks, heart attacks, mental confusion and eventually started to hurt my kidneys (stopped taking about here so luckily didn’t go into jaundice). So be careful when you take vitamins and minerals because a whole lot of what we eat and drink it over supplemented and you can overdose on any vitamin and mineral except Vitamin K.

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Obviously

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Make sure you sort the medical/physical reasons. Keep in mind though that a lot of times the physical reasons are a by-product of the mental reasons. If it’s a dietary reason causing deficiency in something, there’s probably a mental reason that drove you to eat the diet that you do, for example.

What I’ve found for myself is that depression is protection. Our subconscious knows that if it establishes a barrier to keep us from movement both physical and spiritual that we won’t get hurt. We might be miserable but it will keep us in our current state without getting damaged in an unknown way.

So rather then feed the barriers with weed, drink, video games, TV, social media etc., we need to find ways of passing through the barrier without breaking it. If we break it by going straight to the gym or morning runs without signaling our subconscious that it’s safe to do so, the barriers/depression will come back even stronger. And being with friends the families feels good temporarily but we always have to put our social mask on, which further entrenches the barrier.

Things like writing, drawing, music, reading, puzzles, solitary things that provide a creative outlet signals that it’s ok to have movement, that it’s ok to step beyond what’s safe. The depression will still be there, but it will weaken.

Eventually you’ll be able to enter a space where you can meditate enough to try to peel back the layers and see what’s the cause of this. I’m still at it. I’ve “cured” a lot of my mental issues but each time I do I reveal the layer beneath it, though they are weaker and easier to deal with than before.

Trying to fight the depression only strengthens it. Learning how to let go is hard but is the best way. Because once you can let go, you’ll find you have a ton of energy that was spent holding that depression together.

Also ayahuasca did wonders for me

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Exactly as @DarkestKnight said I’d also say that seeing a doctor would be the first thing you do. Your title mentions therapy and meds aren’t helping so it’s worth asking, there’s many different ones and it’s a matter of finding the one that works for you.

I experienced a similar issue early in my path, although due to ADHD, which made me lack motivation and feel like I was always in between a rut and burntout with sporadic action. Magick was able to help significantly but actually getting medication for it and going through the whole process had the greatest impact and ironically, my work with Lucifer led me to finally taking it serious and getting my life back on track not long ago. With that said, up until then I tried all manner of methods so I’ll recommend you the best ones.

Fire Breathing was one of the most effective methods I used. This just helped with energy and motivation a lot, although I needed to do it often. There’s a lot of different ways to do it, what I found worked best for me was combining it with other breathwork. I would do Bhastrika breathing with the Breath of Fire (I linked the video I used to use) while visualizing. I would start the visualization by seeing some small sparks within me which represented the low energy I’d feel and then start the breathing while seeing myself taking in a lot of fire at the same time as I focused on seeing those sparks turn into a much bigger inner fire. This worked best for me when I did it early in the morning and it would give me energy for around a full day. I’d also have a cold shower right after doing it which I noticed worked in tandem to boost my energy further.

The second thing I would do is solar related mantras and work with solar deities. This also gave a lot of vitality, willpower and generally helped to alleviate a lot of the issues. I found that listening to the Aditya Hrudayam Stotram in the morning would help a lot, I would try and recite it myself but if that wasn’t possible I’d still listen and focus on it, and when I could I’d meditate to it. Another Sun Mantra I’d use was this one which is shorter and helped quite a bit. Another alternative is the simpler “Om Sum Suryaya Namaha” mantra. It’s best to only choose one of the mantras you can be most consistent with instead of switching between them. You could just work with any solar spirit for this though, try and call them daily so that you’re around their energies as much as possible. The invocation in this post is also just as good. Any Sun related work would help with this and give a good boost to vitality and willpower.

The third thing is Mars related work. From my experience, while the solar energy gave me the willpower and vitality I needed to do things it was mars energy that actually drove me towards action-taking and getting things done, and it also provides an energy boost of its own. For this I just called worked with Samael daily and would invoke him as much as I could. I would also invoke him before I had any big task to do, if I caught myself losing focus or procrastinating or if I felt otherwise low energy.

The fourth thing is the mental perspective. If you keep thinking you’re just lazy and procrastinating you’re going to blame yourself more which is just going to have a knock on effect and make things even worse. If you keep thinking you’re just lazy you’ll probably not even try things and you’ll feel even worse when you catch yourself procrastinating or failing to do things. That would just overall make everything worse, it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. For getting out of this I suggest working with Queen Naamah. She can help you with getting rid of these beliefs, negative feelings and help you restore your self image. She can help you become kinder toward yourself and more accepting too. She’s able to give you the fortitude and openness so that you can accept you have a problem and stop blaming yourself, in a way where it’s a relief and not just another burden or issue. She’s also able to alleviate (not cure) the symptoms and negative feelings you experience.

Another important thing I found was energy cultivation, not just solar or mars energy but just regular chi cultivation. There’s many different ways to do this and if you go to @Mulberry ‘s profile and search Chi or Chi Cultivation you’ll find practically everything you need. Cultivating energy as often as possible is a good idea, you also need to make sure it’s actually flowing and not stagnant. Also bringing energy in to strengthen and fortify your aura would help prevent against leaks.

Finally, shieldings and clearings daily. I can’t speak for anyone else but my senses are very active, sometimes at my own detriment. I can pick up on energy easily which has helped significantly in my progression but picking up on other people’s energies can be very heavy and even exhausting. Especially if it’s emotional energies. It can feel “grounding” in all the wrong ways. Even if you don’t have that issue and you’re not as sensitive to it, as people we’re all still interacting with many people and their energy daily and that can be having an effect we don’t even consider. Learning a method to cleanse yourself daily is crucial, and so is shielding to prevent you even having to face those issues. Doing that daily would make an impact over time. You should also banish daily to clear your environment because the negative energies created by your current state can be sticky and accumulate. If you want an easy way to quickly cleanse yourself, find a tree or even just one in your garden and focus your gaze on it like you would on a sigil. Keep focusing until you feel yourself “connect” and ask it to take your negative energies away from you and give you pure ones. You probably won’t get a reply but you’ll likely feel it happen.

I’ve also found Agares can help with motivation a lot, I’m not sure exactly how or why but the way he does it feels a lot more natural and not forced. Some other beings I’ve found that can help are Azazel, Belial, Asmodeus, Achaiah and Sealiah among others.

Obviously besides all that, things like diet, sleep and the environment you’re in daily can also play a role.

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How to eliminate procrastination
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I’m considering everything you all have said. I did a vitamin check up and i’m really low on vitamin d, so i started supplementing.I’m also considering talking to my psychiatrist about taking a medication like ritalin or similar, ive taken wellbutrin in the past which is used both for depression and adhd and it was better than the meds im taking now.

Now about energy work, i always felt i could do something to help overcome this. It could be cause by a lack of vital energy, an energy blockage, astral larvae, elemental imbalance, etc. I’m recovering from surgery but when im ok ill try fire breathing or surya bendhana to check how much it helps me with motivation. I lowkey feel a blockage on the solar plexus chakra could be related too.

I feel so frustrated, i see other people practicing magick but I can’t do the same, i just wanna solve this and become a normal person who can do things and achieve his goals.

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I could do a free 45-minute middle Dantian healing (where emotions are located). It can be done in the afternoon, anytime from 6:00 p.m. onward, U.S. Central Time.

Possible sensations:

  • Nothing at all (few cases).
  • Pressure in the chest.
  • Sensation of cold and/or heat.
  • Chills in the chest.
  • Very strong puncture.
  • Burning from the inside, like a laser beam passing through (felt in the back).
  • Energy entering the chest and flowing through the body, strong enough to cause sweating in hands and feet.
  • Volunteer falls asleep during and after healing.
  • Sense of calmness.
  • Hot sensations in the chest, followed by lightness and ease.
  • Initial burning sensation in the chest, which later stopped.
  • Heaviness, buzzing, and tingling in the chest at first, followed by deep calm.
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@MysticNick nailed it, pore breathing and the Middle Pillar Ritual done often will do wonders.

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If you do it would be very appreciated :head_shaking_vertically:

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I not only struggle with depression but with procrastination too, i wonder how ill talk to my therapist about magick… feels kinda weird

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I’m traveling this weekend, but I can do the free 45-minute Middle Dantian healing on any day next week starting Monday in the afternoon, anytime from 6:00 p.m. onward, U.S. Central Time.

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