Confronting a possible invasive entity

Spirits, Evocation & Possession
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I can’t take it anymore. I have to talk about this.

For the past week or so, there’s been some sort of “force” constantly breaching my mind. I say “force” with quotation marks, because at this time I’m not sure if this is an actual entity or my anxiety getting the better of me. A deep masculine voice often speaks to me in a language I neither understand nor recognize. And when he does speak English, I often hear things like “come home” and “my child”. It feels like whoever or whatever he is, he’s poking around my head, learning things about me and trying to warp my perspective of him. I should feel more terrified, but overtime I’ve been feeling more and more apathetic to his presence. It’s as if the more I try to resist him, the stronger his influence over me becomes.

This isn’t the first time this has happened. The very first instance was a few days after my 20th birthday five years ago. I didn’t realize it immediately, nor did I understand what was happening, but my mediumship abilities suddenly spiked in magnitude; I went from being a “spirits-don’t-exist” kind of a person to a “OH SHIT THEY’RE EVERYWHERE” person within a week. During this time, I was on the computer minding my own business when I instinctively felt something trying to worm its way into my head. I felt like my privacy was being invaded, so I resisted. But it won. At that moment, I felt like my whole body was set on fire and being frozen all at once, but I couldn’t scream. Flashes of orange, black and red danced across my vision. It ended as quickly as it began, and I was left with what I can only describe as a gnosis: that this “being” was a demon and my distant ancestor.

As I was emotionally exhausted by then and had no idea what to do about this “revelation”, I kept going on with life as if nothing happened. Keep in mind, I still didn’t know I was a medium and I was not practicing magic at the time. Similar incidents occurred on and off for the next five years until recently. It has gotten to the point where he’s in my head for longer periods of time and I find it difficult to concentrate. There was even a moment where I could have sworn that Asmodeus and Kamael had to step in on my behalf and calm me down, to which I heard the “entity” scream “You can’t keep her from me!”.

And to be clear:

  • I’m not schizophrenic and I don’t suffer from similar disorders (I have been to doctors and they have told me I don’t possess any other signs of such a thing).
  • I don’t take drugs, but I do take medication; but they don’t have any side effects relating to this.
  • However, I do have an overactive imagination. Not sure how much it plays into all of this though. This could also be a case of intrusive thoughts (a normal occurrence for someone with anxiety).

I think I know some information about him; or if I am experiencing some huge chronic anxiety attack, my brain has come up with some details:

  • I know he’s a demon, yet he doesn’t have the same “energy” as demons I sense. This one feel hot and suffocating.
  • I know he’s connected to me somehow.
  • I know his name (or think I do), but every time I try to write it down, I feel distressed. Starts with an ‘s’, if that helps.
  • He wants me to take me somewhere; to “come home” to him.

And the more I resist, the more I feel drawn to him.

It’s almost like he’s trying to brainwash me. I feel as if I’m playing into his hands and that he doesn’t have the best of intentions for me. Hell, maybe it’s not really him, but someone pretending to be him. Yet, the idea of leaving this dimension(?) and seeing him is becoming more and more appealing by the day.

Again, this could be my anxiety getting the better of me. But at this point, I don’t think I can run from this anymore. I intend on confronting the situation tonight. Finally, after so many years of being afraid, I can find out the truth on what is happening to me.

If I don’t respond within the next few days, assume something has happened to me, be it I’ve been harmed by this being, actually taken away, or something similar.

Any suggestions for alternatives or a means of protecting myself are appreciated.

Otherwise, wish me luck.

TL;DR - Feels like something is trying to screw up my brain and take me away from this world. Not sure if anxiety or an immensely powerful being capable of telepathically contacting me across dimensions. Gonna check it out tonight. YOLO and what not.

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Reminds me awfully of these:

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HOOO BOY that was was read. I’m wondering if it will be a similar outcome.

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I don’t know, be careful and don’t jump to conclusions obviously, but there is a similar theme there.

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Will do!

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I don’t even know where to begin with this one… @Prophet @C.Kendall it would appear we all are connected to this same being, in my case, this incarnation and many past… He is not a shadow person nor a parasite, etc… It would be good for others who have been bothered by those types of beings to not make ANY connection to this whatsoever… This is entirely different… It took me years to figure out his name, and I had heard the same deep voice, in a foreign tongue, ancient Egyptian sounding and maybe ever Sumerian… It did start with the letter “S”… I’d be glad to discuss this in private…

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In the scheme of the worlds I was taught, the entities we hold to be “demons” are relative newcomers. They had older counterparts in the older Worlds.

It sounds to me like you are dealing with one of those.

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Welcome home, 320
It’s like E. A. Koetting says, "Conquer your fear and doubt and you will have success. "
At least I think he said something to that degree…
Also it’s Duke Sallos.

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Seek divination. Or call a spirit to help you figure this thing out. For some reason Azazel came to mind.

You should also do a LBRP ritual. Or call on the 4 gate keepers to stand firm by your side and protect you.

That should give you some time and space to figure things out.

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So good news bad news…

Good news is, I’m alive.

Bad news is, I’m left with more questions than answers.

After summoning my guardian spirits, LBRP etc. I got in contact with the entity briefly. I felt an intense anxiety attack coming on, but at least I know now my brain isn’t making things up; I felt his energy directly behind me and one of my candles started behaving strangely with no wind or my breath or anything. I also felt something like a large hand on the back of my hand just resting there. The voice was abnormally deep and nothing like a human’s. I heard an accent too; Austrailian.

I asked him who he was and what his connection was to me, to which he responded with “You know who I am”. I asked him what he wanted with me, which he replied with “You already know the answer; it’s time for you to come home”. He also told me that “When he time comes, you will know what to do” and that “You will be right where I want you”. And then he just left.

I’m stunned. Confused. Angry. After five years of being tormented by him, this is all he has to say?!

I’m going to have another go at it. I refuse to believe that was really the whole story.

Actually, now that I’m writing my response, I wonder if this is what he wants… For me to be angry and try yanking the real answers out of him.

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So I confronted him again, and ended up stumbling over my words when I demanded an explanation for… well everything. “Use your words.” he said condescendingly. It ended up making me angrier. But when I did find my words again (specifically along the lines of “You tormented me for five years and this is the bullshit you’re giving me?!”), he just laughed and said “You are just perfect. I can’t wait to see you in person. It will be a meeting to remember.". He added “Remember: you will know what to do when the time is right.” and “It will be sooner than you think.” When he tried to leave, I shouted “This isn’t over!” and I heard in a deadly serious voice: “This is over.” I felt at that moment that the best decision was to stand down; that this wasn’t something I should press further. He mentioned something along the lines of “The time isn’t right” before leaving. The last thing he said to me (mockingly) was “Try and be a good girl now!”.

I have never felt so irritable about something like this. I mean, yeah, it’s kind of nice knowing I’m not making this up, but I feel like I’m being trolled on a cosmic level, and I don’t know why.

soigjaekrngsoithngeartoig I’m gonna go eat something. And maybe scream at something. I’ll come back to this situation when my head’s more clear.

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I’ve been following this to see how it played out for you. Reason this has caught my interest is because the entity you describe sounds awfully similar to a being I’ve encountered. However, I have my doubts they are the same entity. I will describe my experience if it helps out.

I’ve had experiences with demons prior to this encounter; however, after this experience, I officially delved deeper into my study and practice. To a whole new level.

It was roughly 6 or so years ago. It began with an overwhelming feeling of being watched. This being manifested behind me, I was sitting on the floor. I had never felt such a powerful presence before. This being seemed to envelope the entire room and more. His presence was heavy, thick, and massive. He was initially very cold, but as he embraced me, he became warm.

He embraced me from behind and it felt like I was in a vice. It felt like the darkness itself was wrapping around me. He spoke in a deep male voice, “Child, you are safe and protected.” I was a bit apprehensive, yet comforted at the same time. I allowed my anxiety to dissipate and I tuned-in deeper to the embrace, wrapping around me further. I felt very close to this being, familiar and unfamiliar at the same time.

This being helped me finish shattering my identity, paving the way for my true essence to rise. I was consumed and infused. Broken down; killed. I was finally able to answer the calling. All of the events of my life made sense. All of the encounters, coincidences, endless protection, and misfortunes of those around me. It all just clicked as to “why” and where I belonged.

I haven’t been able to evoke or invoke him. He’s one of those who only comes of his own accord. I am curious as to “who” he is; however, I have yet to know for sure. The only thing I do know is, he was definitely some kind of ancient demon/devil/arch-demon.

Anywho, just felt like sharing.

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Don’t quote me on this, but this strikes me as Nyarlathotep’s style of “fucking with you.”

You know, trolling on the cosmic level is essentially what he does, BUT…
if you can work your way through the madness, and “come out the other side”, he’s not bad to have backing you.

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He is known in my spheres as the Nameless One.

He was called Silenus by the Greeks, perhaps even named so by Dionysus himself, for he is aeons older than the lattermentioned.

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That DEFINITELY sounds like Nyarlathotep, or one of his forms.

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Quit, trying to confront em with fancy words and fucking kill em.
(Update: oh shit ur messing with the big boys, brother)

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Okay, so now that I’m calm (and remembered this thread exists), I’ll start responding to posts by tonight. I’m at work right now, so I can’t do it right away.

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ALL RIGHT CHILDREN

So the being has (kinda) backed off from poking around my brain. But I still feel his presence. I feel like he’s patiently waiting for an opportunity to do something, though I don’t know what specifically. I half-expected my life to be messed up in some capacity, but instead, it’s been the opposite. I’m finally moving out of my dad’s place and into my own apartment, and I’ve been given extra work at my job (which means possible promotion and more moneyyyyy~).

Of course, that could all be unrelated, but it’s something I’ve noticed…

Anyway, it’s time for me to respond to people.

Well, he was right about one thing: I did have some success. Not complete success, but some.

This… This was a fascinating read, and it definitely lines up with my experiences, at least somewhat. I wonder if it’s the same being…

Assuming it is Nyarlathotep, please tell me HP Lovecraft was exaggerating at least some of his traits. Because if I remember his works correctly, the Outer Gods are basically untouchable.

Interesting… Definitely gonna look that up. The moniker “Nameless One” feels familiar somehow.

Yeah, killing this guy is clearly not an option lol.

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In terms of personality, it differs depending on the form, and no Lovecraft wasn’t exaggerating, but of the outer gods, Nyarlathotep can actually relate to the human experience.

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But he’s super malevolent, right?