Thanks. I’ll try to invoke a Shem angel tonight using the proper method and see if I can get any answers. I did try petitioning Haziel before for a somewhat related situation, but I’m starting to think that our conversation was an impostor spirit as well. I’m hoping I can get through to them this time.
I just got done talking with Vasariah. I used Raziel as a pathway like the book suggested so I hope that it was truly her. I also consecrated the pendulum like it said in the book and I found that it was a lot more accurate and to the point after that. She confirmed that it was in fact Asmoday who came through the first time I called on him, but the others were not who they said they are. She also said that it was not Asmoday who I did sex magic with, so my guess is that at some point early on in our relationship Asmoday left me to fend for myself. I asked her if he had any good reason to not help protect me from the parasites and she straight up said no. So that settles that I suppose.
@Virago That’s more or less what was suspected. This business is tricky, that’s why they want us to fend for ourselves. And they’re funny, because Lucifer tried to assign me Asmodeus as a tutelary spirit, and I just told him I want nothing to do with him. And he actually respected that. They can’t be mad at us for wanting us to be more like them when we show the same independence. And he actually acknowledged that.
The point being not about me, but that it seems the legitimate spirit is not as domineering as we expect.
So yeah, time to ask Asmoday what he wants you to get out of this. Where was he? Etc.
I actually asked Vasariah if she thinks I should talk him and she said no. I don’t think I want to either. It actually makes me so upset that he just got up and left when I reached out to him so many times after the fact. This was a very traumatizing experience for me, and like I said I was driven to suicide at one point. I really haven’t learned anything from this except that I need to distance myself from demonolatry overall.
It may be a good step for the moment. I deeply encourage the 72 angels though! Especially Raziel. They can help heal and basically will get you the same things the goetic spirits offer.
I am sorry that your experience was so confused and traumatic. No one deserves that when they’re sincere.
“For things like this, going to other entities isn’t my way. I will pull out the burn it with fire before it lays eggs approach and remove it from my transit personally.”
Become A Living God - Official Forum of Become A Living God.
This. This is perfect and right up my alley. I like having the power to decide who/what is allowed to live and operate within my own sphere of control.
How would one burn it with fire, so to speak?
I didn’t do the link right, sorry. I don’t know how to include just a clip.
Great talk by Jareth Tempest about parasites- All About Parasites! Become All Flame S01E11 - YouTube
It’s relying on visualisation and will. I posted about what I do here and this works on any kind of entity not just lesser astral entities.
So,
- you visualise the entity,
- notice it’s behaviour, confirm you’ve got hold of the right thing, then
- Visualise it burning up. It just catches fire and turns to ash, because you want it to
- From here it runs away or falls to ash
Its not at all complicated, there’s no need for weapons or steps, what you want just happens. I do wonder then, why it doesn’t work for me to just see it poof out of existence or transport to the bottom of the ocean, and I don’t know really I just can’t convince myself that’s what’s happening, the fire seems believable I guess.
I consider this a more feminine style of magick, it’s intuitive and free flowing, rather than structured and ceremonial. But anyone can use it.
Simple, elegant, clean. Perfect. Thank you.
Funny thing is that while they were attacking me I did imagine burning them with a flame just intuitively. I’m not really sure how effective it was though since they’re still haunting me in dreams.
Anyway, I’m going to start reaching out to Mother Kali and see if she will help me deal with the parasites, since I’m now more certain that a real deity would not punish me for having intrusive thoughts. I still do not like demons after this, but I’m going to have to apologize to them for a lot of the things I said about them as well.
@Virago Are you concerned Kali may bring
More of that intensity you have been struggling with? How about Hekate? A nurturing but dark figure? It’s not my business, I just see Kali as having the same energy that traumatized you.
I’m not concerned about it. Kali is a destructive force, but a destroyer of evil and injustice. She’s lauded by her devotees as being a very protective and compassionate divine mother. If that doesn’t work out there are a number of Buddhist deities I can keep reaching out to. I know that if I keep trying one of them will grant me spiritual protection. I can also try to connect with Cahetel again and see what he says.
Despite me saying that I wasn’t going to talk to Asmoday, I did end up calling on him today because I just had one burning question. I needed to know if he was the one who sent the parasites to me or not. He said no and I later confirmed this with Sitael.
There’s this weird blind spot in my memory in which I had forgotten what I did or said after I first called on Asmoday and felt his energy. Important pieces to the puzzle. I used a sigil I made for the purpose of recovering a memory and I just remembered that I ended up petitioning him for help with spiritual discernment.
My current theory is that Asmoday knew a parasite had attached itself to me after our first encounter, and then proceeded to sit back and watch how I would handle the situation on my own. That could be why neither him nor anyone else informed me of what was going on. He wanted me to figure everything out on my own to “test” my spiritual discernment, but somehow things just went horribly wrong. A bit cruel and heavy-handed when I think about it, but it is what I asked for.
I think this should be encouraging when you consider many of our intuitions regarding these entities were correct.
Not because of us- but because it demonstrates a reliable consistency in these entities. That’s something important. Reliability, consistency.
In my experience is the reaction of my psyche to their energy, which I compare to radioactivity exposure. Don’t underestimate the title of “Great and Mighty Kind of Hell”.
Also, many demonolaters talk about side effects on one’s health generally speaking when you work with demons, parasites, or the actual entity.