My best friend’s ex asked me on a date. He gave me the impression that my friend was fine with it (as in she herself told me that him taking me on, like, a practice date was chill). Apparently he has an actual crush on me, and I didn’t tell him a hard no, And I still agreed to a date even after I knew he had a crush, but heavily implied that I was uncomfortable with the idea. The next morning I did tell my best friend about the situation, but this was after she mentioned how not okay she was with that setup with her ex.
Now, I DEFINITELY am an awful person for not saying hard no because that’s an egregious violation of the Girl Code. Anything coming my way I absolutely deserve, and my best friend’s feelings and what she decides to do takes precedence over everything else. That being said, are there any rituals or anything I can do to make me either be more accepting of whatever outcome I get or something to grant both of us some semblance of peace? As much as I would like her to forgive me, that’s not my choice to make. Is there anything I can do to emphasize to her that I deeply regret my lack of action, and that I wouldn’t have even entertained a conversation of a date with her ex if I knew he had feelings for me to begin with and that going in a date even after the fact wouldn’t have amounted to anything because, though I like him as a person, I’m not into him into him. She says she needs space, so the least I can do is give her that.
Even if the only answer is to shut up and eat what I’ve got coming to me, any advice is welcome.