Terrible heartbreak, Do I need to curse?

Love, Sex Magick & Relationships
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Hi people, I would appreciate if someone has advise for me or has the time and space to help me our a bit with some heartbreak…

I feel like I need some advise…I have a painfull situation atm which I is about me and my ex our current break up (2 days ago).

I was with him for 3 years and now it is over I know a lot more about the whole picture of our relationship, of him, of myself. The thing is our relationship isn’t based on a solid foundation where trust is found. We met at work and we felt lust and love (Idk by now if he has real love for me but I am sure our connection is a bit lust based from his side). We fell in love and started a relationship.
During the time we where starting to fall in love he fucked someone on a friends vacation in Spain (a stranger of something) I knew this back then but I continued to start a relationship with him because at that time I was super confident. We broke up after 1 year of a beautifull relationship because not long after moving to my dream city to start my own career (for 5 months) he suddenly felt attracted to someone in the train. When he told me this he tried to explain in details what happend in the train and how that eye contact felt between them. I felt horrible and immediately felt the need to break up. Felt like he wanted me to feel bad for leaving the town we both live in.

I don’t want to make this a too complicated story but… we broke up again after 5 months because of a very loud gut feeling he was searching for things on the side of our relationship. For example He said to me once that when he is out with his friends he knows he is a sex object for other woman. When he told me this I felt so unsafe and uncomfortable also because he had a big proud fucking smile telling me that. He also had problems with removing the girls form our 7 month break to give me some extra trust from his side. (he deleted it)

^ By this time I started to develop more spirituality in life and felt a very strong voice in my head that he is for sure checking other girls out and using his own sneaky ways to do this behind my back. I am sure he never cheated during our relationship but idk if y’all already can feel a type of energy about this story about him. He is actually very sweet to me and loving but I just KNEW he had the same energy of his father ( a lot of kids with a bunch of different woman). When I spirituality awakend I could sense this also. Like his Karmic family issues & Where his issues are coming from

But the fucked up thing is I came back again… It was a very good time now without problems or distrust until he started to take all diff kinds of drugs at a party with me (I don’t drink or do substances anymore because I had an addicted father back then and that broke my heart in my early years so I always had trust issues but I egnolisched them during this relationship with my ex). Because of MY back story we made a promise that if he wanted me to trust him and feel more safe with him again that he would stop substances. And he agreed because he never felted so sick!

This dude broke this super important promise last weekend. He lived last week for the first time in a new city with a lot of female house mates (now he leaved my city to do something for himself and that was a bit hard for me but I let him go because I didn’t want to be the over jealous girlfriend and wanted to be more by myself anyway). After that first week he came back to my city and we wanted to chill like we always do (keep in mind that I had a gut feeling already & still from past events ^^^) Suddenly he got a lot of messages on his phone from a female housemate and I just confidently asked…’ so you have made some friends, I am sorry but I really feel something is off here’ He said that they had one party together that week (which I didn’t know about but that’s okay) and they did drugs together!!! in her room!!! And I said to him if he thought about it wisely when he took it because of our promise & he told me that at that moment he didn’t even thought about me. So I froze and felt soo awful that I was ignoring my gut again CUZ IT WAS ALWAY RIGHT :frowning: BUT I NEVER WANTED TO FUCKING ADMIT TO IT THINKING IT WOULD GET BETTER.
After he told me this I wanted to see the conversations on his phone and what the fuck… they are sending each other songs and he is fucking sending her song I send my ex as an ode to our love…

I finally broke up with him 2 days ago but it is very hard for me atm because 1 I feel stupid not listening to my gut, 2 I thought he would never micro cheat on me because he is always love bombing me when he sees me again, 3 actually I feel pretty cheated on & he always tried to get away with his behavior. I also feel very mad and sad rn because my ex, his mother, his brother and people around us always talk in a therapeutic way to me like ’ He lovesssss you so much, you guys are soul mates… And the reason you can’t trust me/him is because you have a lot of childhood wounds" THE STUPID FUCKING THIS IS THAT I ALWAYS LETTED THAT HAPPEN TO ME, I ALWAYS LET HIM AND HIS MOTHER MAKE ME THINK I AM THE FUCKING PROBLEM WHY WE ARE BREAKING UP CONSTANTLY.

Side note: my own life excluding my ex’s story above is focused on healing my childhood wounds, loving my inner child understanding her, and working trough things for the better for me and for the greater good. I really evolved during this shitty relationship on a spiritual level. So during all this shit I still did shadow work, self work, childhood work. My ex on that behalf is totally not focused on healing and become his best version of himself.

Now to get to question for y’all…

I feel so so so much anger, guilt (because everyone and my ex made me believe he was such a good guy and now I am again breaking up with him. He also said he feels like I blame him for the break up and tried to make me feel bad again), shame around myself for putting myself in this situation, shame that I now am comparing myself again to this female house mate that clearly is on a totally diff path than me (her insta bio is: Defenitly not sober). Lol I am so mad I think that’s clear now XD.

Is it to recommend that I do a curse on my ex because he manipulated me so so much actually that I really feel harmed in my heart…
If so? Does anyone here knows the perfect curse for this situation? like what is best? Making him shit all over himself when he feels gets a boner? or is it okay to make him never get a boner again? What is okay? Will this bounce back to me badly??? Or is there a way that this wouldn’t bounce back to me?
I really need some help making the right desision on this one as I feel a lot of anger and revenge in me.

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I could just do it the light way of course and only focus on myself and my chakra’s to heal myself & don’t give the problem so much energy anymore but yeah idkkkkk. What to do with so much anger. What to do with so much pain.

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I think it’s too soon to make any big decisions and bring magick into the mix, and in the state of stress you’re in you could make things worse and create an obsession with him. (Curses can backfire and link you up like that, same as love spells which are also a sort of curse. )

Wait until you have full calm control of yourself and are not acting out of emotion only. “Revenge is a dish best served cold.” as they say.

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It is very true that I am typing this topic out of frustration and diff kind of emotions, Thankyou for the reply.

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How can I alchemize this anger in the meantime? and not doing anything stupid to myself?

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I would recommend a workout. The anger raises testosterone, even in women, and makes for a great workout, so you can turn it into something the builds you up and makes you feel good about yourself.

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Ok, I’ll be honest, I only read the first half of the story. He humilliated you, used you, gaslighted you… he deserves to be cursed. He earned it.

You don’t really “need” to do it, though. If you’ll feel guilty afterwards, then don’t. If you haven’t blocked him everywhere and still hope, deep down, that you’ll reconcile… then don’t.

Only do it when you’re 100% sure that you don’t want him back, that you deserve better, and that you never want him to contact you again. Then, throw the punches without holding back.

I recommend that you get the Magickal Protection book, get used to doing the Sword Banishing daily, and do the Protection Against Influence ritual so the full truth comes out and you can make better, more informed decisions. Once your mind is clear enough, then you can decide if you curse him or not.

If you do it right now, there’s a chance you’ll feel guilty of the consequences when you see them, and the spirits assisting you won’t like that (you ask them to do something and then you feel sorrow instead of gratitude? not good!).

For now, I suggest the protection rituals I mentioned, and also binding and silencing him to ensure he doesn’t cause any further harm to you.

Also, get tested for STDs.

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For starters, I’d do a cord cutting.

I’d also go no contact while you try to letgo of whatever attaches him to you.

Then when you’re in a better state, weigh what kind of further thing you want to do.

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Thankyou! Yes!
I didnt banish for a long time or protected myself, will do that tonight again & thank you for your view on cursing and what to think trough. Will deeply feel inside after a good angry workout what needs to be done.

Already did a test! Thankyou for your concern. waiting for the results now…

Also the full moon is tomorrow and I just got my period so things are being spiced up haha.

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Thankyou for your reply :pray:

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This is my suggestion and feel free to tell me to F off and follow your own intuition lol.

These types of manipulative people have issues of there own and need to express it somehow and there bright idea is ruining someone else’s life….I know as I been victim of similar situations to yours.

I’d say do some meditation and Ground yourself. That may allow you to completely let go and come to realizations of how useless of an individual someone like that is. I don’t know. That’s what I do and sometimes it reduces my need to even curse them as it makes me think “is that even worth it?” Now again I don’t know how bad it was for you nor will I make assumptions but that is something you can also try maybe. I’m no psychologist ( I’d be scared for the sake of humanity if I was :joy: ). But I hope I helped.

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Very much grateful for the replies… I thought for a long time (3 years) that everything was my fault. I am glad people shake me tf up that that isn’t the case at all.

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It seems you are already thinking that it’s not worth too much energy. But of course at the end of the day if a curse feels right to you then nobody here should have the right to tell you otherwise. We can only provide suggestions and advice. At the end of the day it’s you who must listen to your intuition and do what’s best and what feels right to you.

That’s the philosophy I follow when practicing magick.

People all around me seem to manipulate me and use me for only materialistic things or help or advice. Otherwise I’m a ghost and people irl ignore me and treat me like I’m nothing. So I simply decided I’m done helping them, I said that on my snap chat story I said screw all of you goodbye. So sometimes a change of attitude is even good enough to find peace.