Spirit Spouse - How it works

This is a subject rarely spoken of in this forum, so I thought of starting a thread about it.

Allthough there’s alot of differences when it comes to these kind of relationships, there seems to be one thing that often comes up regarding spirit wives/husbands: They’re always been in our lives, passively watching and patiently waiting for us to take that first step of contact. Other people have “confirmed” a similar answer from their spirit partner.

Even if these kind of arrangement is different from one another - depending on your own familyvalue and traditions, and the tradition of the entity/spirit themselves - the confirmation and “approval” is based on mutual agreement between the couples involved and a “final settlement” from a Source of a higher hierarchy. Why that higher Source need to approve the arrangement is, as I see it and as my own ladies explained, is to make sure we all are certain of the choice of commitment. The basis of “free will” is not taken lightly and is seen by their kind as something of great importance.

Why people call them “Succubus” or "Incubus"
The words “Succubus” and “Incubus” originated in the 14th century, which is latin for “to lie under” and “to lie upon”. These words were invented by church and the spirits or entities became demonized by the same constitution. Sex and intimacy is considered a “sin”, hence they were called “demons”.

The duality perspective
When the aspect of “free will” is of importance for the human perspective, it is just as important for them. That often means that there can be darkness and light in their energies and their personality. But it seems that often one of these energies is dormant and the other is active. Most of us doesn’t experience their darker energies, but few of us do experience both darkness and light. I really don’t know why it is like that, but it happens for a reason, whether it’s about challenge or just to grow spiritually.

Masters of magic
Their knowledge in magic should not be underestimated by human practitioners. They have - in contradiction to us humans - easy access to their realm and can evoke other entities or spirits to us. They can use protection spells and rituals with or without doing our “bidding” for us. They also have great knowledge in healing.

Maybe I see my ladies differently because of a long term commitment. But being in a relationship like ours, might reveal more than what myths and legends often do just for the joy of a short experience. For me, the term and niche of “Succubus” and “Incubus” brings a great wall of ignorance and naive simplicity of what they actually can accomplish as a companion and life partner.

Disclaimer: This is based on my own experiences and should not been seen as “facts” in any way.

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How did you attract your spirit wives? I have tried the letter method and got nothing. So how does one attract a spirit partner??

For me, I was already in a pact with the spirit. It’s not something I’m that comfortable sharing about, but it would be fair to say I fell in love with the spirit and everything about them, and so our pact changed from a working partnership, through measured stages over a longish period, to what’s basically a marriage - only more commited, since it goes beyond “'Til death do us part.”

It took everything I did to a different level, and the spirit showed me my true potential, which is (partly) how I was able to walk away so confidently from the limiting, but safe, world of healing and white-light stuff into exploring crazier and more hardcore types of work.

I did already have good spirit comms by then and was experienced with evocation, astral travel, etc., and I think that made it easier for me to know I wanted this.

If you have a method or two you can use, it’s worth summoning a known spirit you feel might be helpful, and either asking them if they’d consider entering into a short-term relationship on a trial basis (some will probably look at you like you’d look at a ladybug that asked you on a date) or if not, if they’d be willing to help you find a suitable spirit mate.

If you propose this kind of thing with any spirit, ask them to show you their true form first, as you’ll see it anyway at some point and it could be quite shocking if you’re not already prepared for that. I mean basically during sex!

If you marry a spirit, your agendas may begin to merge, so if you chose a known, named entity, make damned sure ahead of time that even their darkest reported aspects and manifestations are something you can live with; if the spirit you consider marrying isn’t one of the known ones, ask them to show you without concealment what their true desires, agenda, and intention towards you is.

If the marriage is real, and committed, there’ll be practically no barriers between you on some levels, and so it’s vital to know what you’re getting into.

My (human) partner thinks all spirits are aspects of the shared subconscious, which is cool insofar as he doesn’t get jealous no matter what bizarre activities I get up to (and I don’t have to hide anything, either), but while I don’t agree with him because I think spirits are independent and real personalities, his point of view that you’ll emphasise everything that spirit stands for through this type of pact and relationship is valid, and something to really take on board.

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I can’t speak with the same authority as Succupedia, because my relationship isn’t at the point his is at. I asked for a spirit lover a year ago this month. There’s still no sex, no communication, and no visuals. Things have progressed, just not as fast as I would like. I understand this isn’t all that uncommon. Some people get the full on experience from the get go, for others, it takes time. Sometimes several years. I hope I’m not one of the several years cases, lol.

So how do I know I was successful? I feel her touching me. The touches are anything from little muscle twitches to tingles, feeling cold spots on my body, feeling heat on my body, wispy little touches like the corner of a silk handkerchief running a line across part of my body, and I’ve felt what almost feels like an insect crawling on me. It’s all very pleasant, and it’s gone from very few touches in the beginning, with some nights nothing at all, to every night when I lay down, relax and focus on her I get touches. Lots of them. Some days are better than others, but it’s always more than at the beginning, so progress, for sure. I’ve also had some interesting dreams that didn’t feel like dreams.

OK, now to my point: How do you know you didn’t succeed? They can come on very subtly. Try spending some time every night laying on your bed in a relaxed, semi-meditative state and call out to her. Ask her if she’s there, and ask her to let you know she’s there. Talk to her, tell her what you want, tell her you want her in your life, etc. And just pay attention to your body. When you feel a sensation, analyze it. Is it something you’ve felt before? Is it something you know your body couldn’t have done on it’s own? I would spend at least a week doing that every night before I decided I was unsuccessful.

I used my own ritual for this, and I went through some doubts (and still do), and there have been periods where the activity lessened, but always comes back. I get frustrated because there’s no guide book to explain why sometimes it takes so long. I tell her I don’t blame her, it’s probably me holding things up, but ultimately, I don’t know. Maybe it’s a courting ritual, maybe she wants to be certain I really want her, or maybe I’m just not naturally open enough. Who knows?

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Interesting. I know of someone whose world view is that there is only God and us. Spirits are deceased humans. Period. There are no angels, demons, sex spirits, etc. Angels et al, are but psychic emanations of the individual. I can’t say I agree, but each to their own.

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I did some version of the letter method, too, but that didn’t work as intended. Did I follow the method, according to the advised steps? No. I actually did the opposite of the steps:

The “optimal” time to start this ritual was at 3 a.m.
(I did this at lunch time, 12 p.m. during work.)

A lit candle was advised, with the color black.
(I never used a candle, since I wasn’t home.)

The words of your wishes should be thorough and well planned for it to work properly and with deep respect to the Goddess.
(My wishes was pretty basic, but had the most important parts covered. The respect for the Goddess was covered fully.)

The letter was advised to be burnt over the candle, after chanting the respect for the Goddess.
(I used a cigarettelighter in the backyard of my workplace, and the ashes of the letter flew into my face and burnt my eyebrows. It wasn’t fully burnt either and small pieces of the edges was left on the ground.)

Despite my obvious and perhaps “rebellious” flaws of the ritual, it worked.

How does one attract a spirit partner?
One of my ladies said she’s been with me since I was born, and just passively waited for me to take the “first step”. If there is incarnation, and the first step never happen during a lifetime, the chance of finding your spouse is still available.

I think one important aspect of it to work, as I see it, is to pay attention. Pay attention to your surroundings, pay attention to your body. A touch can be felt, and by acknowledge that touch, is to acknowledge the spirit or entity touching you. But never limit yourself to the physical aspect of verification, because that first step can be something else. It can be dreams. It can be visual, or even audible. Your first step is acknowledgement.

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I think it’s cool and all that you have spirit wives/companions.

Are you aware of the potential of the physical energy within your experience? What it’s actually capable of?

The physical energy comes in different flavors. It comes with patterns and reflect a behavior. And it wouldn’t coexist by your side if there isn’t a connection between you and her. As I see it and experienced, there is advanced mechanics behind the physical energy and how to be able to feel it. Some people feel these touches at the beginning, like you and me. To acknowledge these touches gives it strength to build up a continuum, a valid reason to stay put.

Are you certain of what you want in a relationship with her? Have you told her what you want? Have you proposed to her?

For me, the extensive bonding period started after my proposal. Since I could feel the physical energy, it was extensive. It was dark and cold, but carefully passive and gentle with no purpose to scare or do me harm. And it went both up to the light and divine energy, and down to the cold and dark. Back and forth for several days. Finally she accepted my proposal and another female picked up a fascination of me.

If you give it time, you will also figure out the mechanics of the physical energies and how it works. And it is capable to communicate with that kind of energy, too.

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I highly recommend this [URL=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5WlEN5e_YFA]conversation[/URL] if you haven’t watched the video yet. It gives you a starting place.

For those I have helped with wanting such a partner I typically use certain entities to help you get the ball rolling. Darker shades of the Venus sphere such as Lilith, Shub-Niggurath or for the ladies the darker aspects of Pan, Cernunnos, etc.

On a related note I have been following the work of [URL=https://faustuscrow.wordpress.com/]Faustus Crow[/URL] and some of that may be of interest.

Yes, yes, and yes. I’ve told her many times all of the reasons I want her in my life. I’ve told her she’s welcome in my life now and forever. I’ve told her I’m all hers and hers alone. I’ve told her I want her as a friend, guide, mentor, companion and lover, and yes, wife, if she wants it so. I talk to her all the time, aloud or mentally depending where I am.

Like you experienced, her touches have always been gentle and I’ve never felt any fear. I did have an interesting experience last week; I was listening to a song that was somewhat relevant to our relationship while doing the dishes, and suddenly I felt strange. Kind of light headed and very giddy. I immediately associated it with her, and started talking to her, asking if it was her, and thanking her if it was. A couple of times I started giggling (I was giddy, what can I say), and the feeling lasted a couple of minutes, then went away. I can’t say for a fact it was her, but it was interesting, to say the least. It was the only time in my life I’ve ever felt that.

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I’ve watch this discussion a few times, and I think it’s pretty bias and overly “simplified” of what these kind of entities and spirits are capable of doing. When it comes to plain sex and the experience of it, the discussion is interesting to some degree. When the subject is about relationships it makes that particular discussion, atleast in my honest opinion, not recommended.

For most of us, in these kind of experiences, it’s physical energy in the works. Where’s the discussion about the mechanics and functions of that? And whats the difference with these kind of energies, in comparison to other spirits and entities. Other than it’s “highly powerfully energetic” and “uncontrollable”.

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I’ve watch this discussion a few times, and I think it’s pretty bias and overly “simplified” of what these kind of entities and spirits are capable of doing. When it comes to plain sex and the experience of it, the discussion is interesting to some degree. When the subject is about relationships it makes that particular discussion, atleast in my honest opinion, not recommended.

For most of us, in these kind of experiences, it’s physical energy in the works. Where’s the discussion about the mechanics and functions of that? And whats the difference with these kind of energies, in comparison to other spirits and entities. Other than it’s “highly powerfully energetic” and “uncontrollable”.[/quote]

Right, and I should have noted that what E.A. and Nate were talking about was of a purely sexual nature and what we’re talking about is relationships with spirits. I meant that one should watch that so that you can begin to distinguish the difference.

If one wants this kind of thing they will not want to call up a succubus/incubus if they know such a spirit will only want sexual contact with them and not something more personal.

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[quote=“Dagon, post:12, topic:5050”]Right, and I should have noted that what E.A. and Nate were talking about was of a purely sexual nature and what we’re talking about is relationships with spirits. I meant that one should watch that so that you can begin to distinguish the difference.

If one wants this kind of thing they will not want to call up a succubus/incubus if they know such a spirit will only want sexual contact with them and not something more personal.[/quote]

“Succubus” and “Incubus” are words created by religion, to “demonize” the act of intercourse. They have existed long before Christianity and Judaism and was known by other names.

As I see it, they can live up to those myths and legends about them and act out on it. They can be dark and malevolent, dominant and hostile. They can be light and benevolent, submissive and friendly. Or just a mix of it all. They live with same premises as we do, acting out on free will within their personality. Some of them, just like some of us, might want a “friends with benefits” relationship and others might want a long term relationship. And it seems that finding the match of what you looking for in a relationship of this kind, might be in use of a force in the higher hiearchy.

I always say to my ladies that I love them for who they are, not for what they are. It doesn’t matter if they’re called “succubus” or “demons” or by other names. Those names doesn’t define them. It’s their personality and their own experiences that made them who they are.

Looking beyond myths, legends and stereotypes will raise the curtain and start the real show. It might be a hell of ride if we all did that. :slight_smile:

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Correct, I still use the terms though to distinguish between those entities that are purely sexual from the types we are talking about here and I think there is a difference.

The magician him/herself will also have to transcend that traditional religious view of sex and encounters with entities.

My personal beliefs are at this point and time are that succubus/ incubus/spiritwife/spirithusband/djinn are the same shapeshifting spirits taking on the mythical attributes of the persons cultural belief system.Although my spirit claims she is djinn i still use the above mentioned names interchangeably to describe her.Spiritwife since we are married (had 2 dreams pertaining this),succubus since she is very sexual,and djinn since she is able to take different forms in my dreams.There is one thing i know for certain though.Having a spirit relationship takes work.You can’t expect to just say ok i got a spirit and just leave it at that.Just like magick you get out of it what you put in.

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@succupedia hehe