Hello. I took shrooms multiple times and in the past 2 years started encountering entities. The first were shadow people, which I learnt is a known phenomenon. I also saw my Chakras that day, and felt this voice inside me when looking into my own eyes, as if something was hiding within. I have to mention I had 2 psychotic episodes, one at 14 and one at 18. This is not one of them, while I do not consider those episodes as “crazyness” (“Guessed” too many things). I started exploring more but I am unsure of what I am experiencing.
One time, at the seaside, everything was very clear to see. Many eyes up in the sky, many shapes and arcades around each being and tree, many feelings. I layed down, put hands over my body and it felt like my stomach is full of something, like that chakra is blocked. Both the root and the other 2 ones above it. I talked to myself a lot that hour, my hands forming mudras (I did not know what mudras were, not one bit) and at some point the word “Kundalini” started popping into my head, as well as what mudras were, just information out of nowhere. I looked at my hands and saw elephant fingers, the name of “Ganesha” popping in my head. I had not been reading anything about hinduism ever since I was 14, before my first psychotic episode. It felt like a breakthrough.
Next few times I still saw entities, one of them being this floating eye who seemed to be neither good nor bad, just present and watching. However, at some point during my last trip I saw an eye which I could tell was malevolent, evil. It was scary and yet I tried to laugh at it, calling it ugly and not fun, and quickly made my escape with my boyfriend (he doesn’t see these things but believes me and assists me). We headed to a monastery, which was part of the plan before the sighting of the demon in that house. Once I reached the monastery, I entered and imediately felt like an intruder. I went to a portrait (we call it icoana in my country, Romania, don’t know the term for it in english) and stared Jesus in the eyes, meditating. It felt like he was looking at me with 2 different eyes and from time to time, there was like a painful feeling slashing through my head. It felt like he was holding the cross as a weapon sometimes, like someone holds a bottle when they’re about to hit you. He told me he knows of the Merkaba, of auras and some of these teachings, that there is darkness within me but that I am not ready or worthy yet to get rid of it. Then, when looking at another portrait, felt as if he told me “Your kind is not welcomed here”. I didn’t know if he meant because I normally gravitate around Hindu, not Christian religion. Finally, Holy Mary told me (or so I felt) that I will be alright, not necessarly with Jesus, but I will be fine. I went outside and started breathing, focusing on the energy of my body. I started sensing something and, with my eyes closed, I could see around my pelvis and ovaries, only on the right side though, multiple pairs of eyes like the one in the house, malevolent. Sometimes I could even see their mouths, if I focused pretty hard, and it felt like they were grinning at me, feeding on the fear released by me seeing them. Thing is, I had an abortion when I was 15. So I thought maybe it has something to do with that, but i don’t know if these demons were just latching onto my aura, or are actually inside. They also kind of let me know that whenever I masturbate, they are there. I struggled with porn addiction and sometimes, when my boyfriend gives me oral and I try to think of him, it feels like a frequency is trying to distract me by making me think of fucked up things, which make me feel guilty. Ever since being aware of these things however, I have started to become better at controlling my thoughts when using sexual energy.
My question is: do the Hindu Gods and Jesus have a bad relationship? Or what exactly is up between them? Also is it wise to talk to Deities from multiple religions? Like if I see myself as more Hindu, is it okay to try and speak to Thoth? Or should I stick to Hinduism and try to speak to Ganesha again? The first and only time I did it was by mistake, but I think maybe now it will be easier because of it being intentional. Also how do I make sure my room is safe to do this? Is it okay if I use the shrooms? Since Shamans used to use them to go into trance, or still do, is it wrong? Is it more likely to attract lower frequencies rather than divine? I want to get rid of these demons, I am not into dark magic although have always drawn demons my whole life… I liked the aesthetic, didn’t know they were real. I even have a very cartoonish, simple devil tattoo on my ankle. I should cover it probably, right? Every imagery has power, from what I understand. But yeah, I welcome any advice, information, tips, on how to safely be a psychonaut and not get touched by darkness while searching for light and guidance. Also am open to any interpretation of my experiences. Thank you for the patience of reading this, reader.
Welcome to the forum!
Please do make your next post your Introduction here, which we need per the forum rules.
To be honest they probably were artifacts of the trip. Everybody has different hallucinations on psilocybin and there’s not that much consistency: it’s very personal communication from your own subconscious. So my feeling is, it’s all about you and provides a base for internal work similar to dreamwork. Everything is a representation of your own inner world and is your subconscious tell you something, or, sometimes just you witnessing the crap it muses to itself and there’s not enough meaning to waste your time on, just enjoy the creativity.
Then you probably should avoid psilocybin as that can bring on psychosis. especially when you’re already susceptible. It’s best to avoid magick until you’re fully stable as that too can excacerbate brain chemistry issues.
No, not necessarily. My tips
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Don’t take it too seriously, as the last thing you want here is stress.
Start asking questions and building your worldview with the answers like jigsaw pieces in a puzzle, avoid random purposeless trips: you get get random purposeless info. -
Before a trip, set your goals and intentions as clearly as you can, and bring yourself back to the goal. Write everything down afterwards
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Always keep your eyes closed so you don’t waste the trip looking at the visuals happening to your environment.
There’s good tips in here to understand what’s happening and what can happen to your brain:
I have never had that level of an experience from psilocybin. Good for you.
I suffered several psychotic episodes years ago due to drug abuse of some very dangerous drugs. I have since used LSD many times without any hint of an issue.
I have to disagree with Mulberry on this one because I have personal experience being just fine using these substances despite having had psychosis in the past. Everyone is an individual and a person can either choose to be healthy or they can choose to be sick. That includes illness of the mind. Precautions should be taken if you are on prescribed medications that would interfere with, reduce or outright eliminate your ability to trip. Such as anti-psychotics, benzodiazapines, and or antidepressants; MAOI & SSRIs.
Much of what people see during psychedelic trips are not hallucinations but is instead a glimpse past the curtain of your physical reality into the beyond. These hallucinations can vary because the beyond is in fact infinite. There can be some overlap and similar experiences shared by those who enjoy psychedelics, and then there will be many experiences that transcend the status quo and show you new things you’ve never seen before.
I’ve seen my skeleton, my veins and my aura as well. - [My aura is Indigo] LSD and psilocybin work by opening up the crown & third eye chakras. This allows easy clear communication between human and external entities. Magick could be considered dangerous if you go about it with a careless attitude. Regarding the chemicals within the brain, yes that can be affected for sure. But if proper cautions are taken this is not so much something to worry about. You must learn to walk before you can run. The point being, don’t try to run into doing rituals or working with heavy duty spirits before you’re ready. Always give yourself a break between both trips and rituals to gather your thoughts and make sure you’re feeling balanced before attempting another.
Personally I would recommend working with spirits before going into another shroom trip. If you find the right ones appropriate for you they can help teach you and guide you to make better and better life choices. Spirits that have good intentions towards you will ideally bring about a balanced mind and energetic resonance of the soul further preparing you for psychedelic journeys/learning experiences. Then when you’re feeling ready you can with guidance of your guardian spirits proceed to mesh ritual magick with psychedelics.
I like to do a quick tarot spread ahead of doing any psychedelic and ask Lilith what her thoughts on the idea are. Each time she gave me the green light to proceed the subsequent psychedelic journeys were life altering. One time she didn’t give me the go ahead. I dropped acid anyways despite the warning and I had a terrible time. Though this was because I was tired and thought it was a good idea to trip when it was not. Always get enough sleep before attempting to trip!
Everyone is an individual and just because it worked for me doesn’t mean it will work for others. BUT it doesn’t mean it won’t work for you. There is a high probability it will work out well. You’ll have to find out for yourself.
Goodluck
Mulberry’s advice is sensible. People with mental health issues should ground themselves before combining drugs and magic. We have had incidents of people saying using magic while on drugs have caused them to develop mental health issues and that can open the forum to all sorts of legal liabilities especially given that you don’t need an account to search these posts.
With that said it’s probably sensible to work with entities without the use of drugs first just so you workget a sense of what took look out for when on drugs and can discern the magic from the trip.
Each to their own though. Do what works for you
Thank you for the information! Very nicely said, however, I have learned not to take hallucinations as just some funny stuff I see. While some might be visions reflecting my subconscious, others I still believe are external. Thank you for the advice, I love Huberman so it is indeed a good source, I have not watched this one yet. I can assure you I have learnt from my psychotic experiences and know not to dive in too deep and take good breaks between my trips. Your tips are useful though, bless you!
Your reply is the best one so far, I also read Tarot although I am just a beginner and just read for myself (I am afraid of reading for other people and assuming that responsibility). I have learned to be cautious and wary of these substances so as not to enter psychosis again, although it was a very interesting state, that was dangerous. Thank you for the advice. I will work with the spirits before and be careful to take good healthy breaks in between. I once had trips too close to eachother and I could feel how exhausted I was after, so I will not abuse it. Very useful tips around here, very glad I found this website! Best of luck to you as well and again, very grateful for everyone’s replies here. If there are any rituals anyone could recommend, I am all ears, although I will also search for them in already existing threads. 