Magick is a paradoxical thing. To get what you want you must release your lust for results. The more you consciously think about getting what you want, the less you give room to your subconscious and the forces beyond it to get to work; changing yourself and plotting synchronistic coincidences that bring forth your will.
Emotion is good when the ritual is being done, that is, the emotion that you already have what you want, but then you must let it go and focus on other things on your life. Not that magick can’t be done while thinking about the target, but, my girl, it’s easier to move a ship that isn’t anchored.
Even in the grimoire traditions, you must have the conviction that your Will, through the rite, IS reality. It can never be any other way, and as sure as you are of the sun rising in the morning or of chocolate tasting good, you gotta be sure that it has come to pass.
I’m sorry to say (and let others prove me wrong), but magick simply cannot be if you are unable to do this, even if you pay someone else to do it, your thoughts might gum up the works. That’s one of the reasons why silence is also such a key factor. The more people that know that you are doing magick, the more their thoughts and “energy” will influence your works, and that works both ways.
I won’t bore you by saying that there are other fellas to get on with, but know that like a magnet, this craving of yours pushes him away and it blinds you to the possibilities of what could be in the infinite of causality.
The thing is all this anger is a response to my love. For weeks I was begging him to come back, over and over explaining my love for him etc. So of course when it gets to this point I will be angry. When he was begging and crying for me I was compassionate. So the fact that he is closing the door on me makes me feel like I should’ve done it to him. I do want him back, but he should come back apologetic. I know this is conflicted. Some days I cry because I miss him and other days I’m angry but I’ve read a lot of people’s experiences being the same. I even read someone who did a spell to get their ex back just as punishment idk if it worked properly
Anywayyhyh my biggest wonder is how I see people online don’t have strong emotion for someone but say “oh I did an obsession spell as a test on this guy and he became a stalker, or same with love.” How is it so easy for them
It’s easier for them because they are not attached to their result. They don’t care one way or the other so they let the magick work as it will.
Like I previously stated, you have to be okay with the magick not working. Unless you can get to that point, you’re going to keep going around in circles.
Also, you have to decide whether you want him to return to you, OR if you want to punish him. He hasn’t done anything overtly wrong in his eyes, so he has no need to apologise, and it is highly unlikely you can get him to do so and return to you.
You need to choose before you cast the spell because your conflicting emotions won’t get you anywhere.
What I meant is like. Apologizing for the hurt he’s caused me. I love him so much but I’m angry that he left me. I cry remembering what we had but he’s hurt me so much. How can he say he’ll never have anything like me again but leave. (I’m gonna do a bath cleanse ritual in case the rotten people in his life cursed our relationship)
I want him to come back but I want it to be in the form of begging. I just feel like it rights what’s been wronged. I know it sounds cruel but I did love him so much he even said I made him so happy and he’d never leave.
I shouldn’t mention this but someone that was teaching me said they did a ritual for me that was diff from a typical spell. Tbh idk. He said it won’t be instant but he should come back desperate like that.
But I’m so impatient I wanna do spells and see results.
Baby, don’t worry about it. Drop the issue and live your life. That’s how you get the spell to work. You have to forget it is happening. You only forget it by living your life, and filling it with great things for you.
Thanks but I’m just worried because I don’t think I even cast it properly. It lasted 5 min I wanna do something full out. arent spells supposed to be like 30 min?
Say what you will about xtianity folks, they have this part right:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
What you are describing is not Love, no matter how you try to dress it up.
@DarkestKnight is 100% spot on, multiple people have tried to tell you the same thing; consider the possibility that your are deluding yourself to make yourself the hero/martyr in your own story.
Did he do anything to hurt you? LIke on purpose? ignore you, use you for benefits of any kind? sex, money, resource, therapy, information knowledge, etc… Ghost you? string you along? break promises?
If he didn’t do any harm other then leaving/break up. Then there is no reason to hurt him.
In my case, she mistreat me on purpose and her partner threaten me at my work place. broke promises. use me for my skill and left me hanging in cruel way of ghosting/abandoning. … hence, practice magick on them couple for justice not for revenge. I care for her as my love don’t change. yet, i’m desiring to do these magic for justice and to learn and to teach them soul lesson. It’s not right to do wrong to someone and have no remorse/guilt or not even apologize when I point out her mistreatment that she is aware of. When she try to blame me for her bf’s threat and reverse all fingers pointing at me due to my kindness/love of being a real friend, that takes the cake. That got me on the path to learn magick . It’s been few months now and I’m cool with it. of course i’ve been stuyding LOA and other mind stuff. This demon/angel magick just adds more skills to my tool box.
I’m open to her being my friend in future, however, that’s not priority. only if she own her bad behavior treatment which is unlikely due to her ego. Her partner just have to suffer for instigating her to leave me. I would of been ok if she talk to me in person to end our friendship but she went route of silence and me forcing her to respond through email by angering her with the truth that she’s fake friend for avoiding me for a yr. No respect or social ethics to talk in person. It’s just a big misunderstanding which she won’t allow in person. So she’s going to have a fun journey with my magick. I won’t be there so it don’t matter if it’s tough journey for her. For using me, it’s now my duty to get justice. Well, i don’t care that she use me. It’s how she broke our friendship that piss me off.
I dont know if my statement goes against the rules ( if so please remove moderator) but you can hire E.A. or another spell caster from the BALG site
Since you are new to this stuff
Even if you hire someone u should clear your mind and no doubts … wont work if you are always thinking about him with anger and all
good luck to you, i know breakups are hard but keep control of yourself
Dude, I love your stuff. This is as fundamental as it gets and this response should auto respond under every new “bring my ex back” thread there is.
Quality, and exactly put into words what was needed to change regarding something huge that shifted for me recently. I might do a write up soon after I wrap my head around it but Azazel lead me on 3 journey’s of the body, mind, and soul that got me thinking about what I truly value in life.
I’m going to spread this any time someone is saying “Make it work!” It’s true detachment, it’s easier than “lust for result” and pretending to not want it. It’s making genuine peace with it after asking for it.
DarkestKnight is right - you have to detach. Obsess over him and it’ll slam the brakes on your work.
If you’re putting your thought, energy, intention, and emotion into it, you’re doing a spell. Hell, I’ve usually written my own spells instead of using spells from a book (in no small part because I lived out in the boonies with my super-nosy family when I started doing magick, so I had to make do with whatever spell components I could find around the house or in a mainstream grocery store).
You’re clearly hurting a lot right now and that won’t just affect magick negatively, it can wreck your judgment and your ability to think straight. That can blow back on your entire life. Take some time to simmer down and heal - you’ll feel better, and your magick will deliver a stronger punch.
If it’s any consolation, what your experiencing is so completely normal. Loving him hating him, making excuses for him and then blaming yourself, hating yourself etc. spiraling towards desperation and not knowing which emotion is real when if fact they all are.
There are so many facets to this scenario this but to date, your entire magickal journey has had this one focus from the beginning and it’s not healthy for you.
I’ve said this before but I see so much potential in you and I don’t want to see you in the obvious pain you are. All of us are here for you in some way or another sometimes saying what you want to hear and sometimes not.
Work on you for a little while, give it 3 months to make some new friends here, get the basics of magick down, find a topic that interests you and put all of you into it.
Ask @DarkestKnight for a book recommendation and I’ll read it with you, we’ll start a topic on that book and share your learning and growth that others can learn from and grow from as well. I have never offered that to anyone but for you it’s extended if you accept the challenge.
More than this I can not do other than send good energy your way.
Some friendly advice here, because I can understand how much this hurts…work your way through getting over him, yes, love spells exist to get your lover back, but I wouldnt go that route, do you really want someone to return to loving or adoring you under the influence of unseen forces and energies? it is not real imo, its like giving someone drugs to remind them of all the loving feelings they had about you, and also to make them obsessed over you, at least, thats my jist of it, as I have never used a love spell, but I think it almost always backfires, and what if you realise hes not what you wanted and get tired of him after a while? the “off switch” may be extremely hard to switch, and sometimes it may not be there.
I read a story about a Frenchman who was obsessed over this woman and used a love spell on her, after a while he grew bored, but the woman wouldn’t stop going after him, eventually he hanged himself, and the woman just went crazier every day and became a mess, at least thats how i remember the story, i have to reread the book written by that occultist.
You have to be strong within, Will is everything, everything will eventually pass, however, if obsessive thoughts about him persist, I would suggest spells to help you get over him, I do NOT suggest using love spells or obsession spells, unless you want him under your control.
but I’m just worried because I don’t think I even cast it properly. It lasted 5 min I wanna do something full out. arent spells supposed to be like 30 min?