Maybe cause we’re close i think maybe i was choosen to remind you for the finishing part of the journal either way yes you are not the same anymore and you deserve to write a journal that you feel close to right now so do let me know when you make a new one cause i want to be the first one to comment on that ^-^ 
i just hugged you lol
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Last Entry: Part 1/2
If I go back and re-read the entries, missed messages and questions before that time I went on a hiatus again, I’d say I was gone for a span of six months or so. But since I didn’t, it’s too early in the morning here to feel that familiar cringe at my old entries , I’d say I was only in hermit mode for a few weeks to a single month.
That’s how quick it felt, until it started sinking in that there were completely new faces again for both curious interactions and serious readings, old acquaintances were now inactive and I was much more unfamiliar/unknown to most. While this had me in glee because I genuinely like the focus more on the help + information I could provide when able rather than me as an actual person, I can’t help but notice that both around and within me, so many changes have occurred already. I would usually be gone for quite some more time than I’m actually aware of, with even one of the PMs left by a new querent noting this and saying, “You always haven’t been online for so long. Why? Many things happening in your life, maybe?”
Maybe. But the more I practice magick to utilize it in the mundane, the more I’ve come to the conclusion that maybe, I just like making things happen.
And maybe I just suck at estimating and telling the time.
As a final entry for this journal, I will be sharing some successes and failures I’ve experienced throughout those months of online inactivity. Some of my success stories so far are:
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Money manifestation for a friend in need with King Belial’s help – I started with having only 500 pesos in mind because I was skeptical of my ability to really help this friend out (to which I was chided by King Belial about, as usual). In a week, I received an extra 1,500 pesos from a family member come his payday + lucky break at work. As payment for King Belial’s help, I gave up the 500 pesos I was saving to buy myself some old books on sale which I really wanted, and added it instead to the money I manifested for the friend. So all in all, she received 2,000 pesos.
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Small healing work and emotional influence on a review school classmate – I had a review school classmate who is gay but ended up, in his own (bitter) words after I confronted him about the issue, “catching feelings for me despite not knowing why”. I would’ve left this alone if I knew he could handle it maturely, but he’s much younger than me, not to mention that his anger, rage and confusion at himself and his sexuality/feelings greatly impacted his performance in review school. He started blowing off classes, his practice and mock exam scores went down, his social media accounts began to be filled with nothing but depressing tweets and hopeless poems. All these, along with the mess of emotions I could feel him trying to face every day, made me think that I just can’t sit and do nothing when I know I can help even a bit.
I did a tarot reading about him first and asked the cards to tell me a story of who this person truly is, what he is going though, etc. However, I didn’t ask the cards for any answers or solutions: I just did the reading so I could fully immerse myself in his energy. And boy, did I feel so much self-hate, self-pity, confused attraction and anger but I visualized all the emotions pooling in a metaphorical heart, which would then be shined on and purified by this blinding white light. I usually didn’t stop visualizing until I could feel my own heart chakra as if it was “cracking open” with all his emotions, as if to release and receive that light in my mind’s eye. Usually, when it’s working I would feel an overwhelming sensation and warmth in my chest, along with sudden tremors and tears here and there because of the weight of his emotions. It was very heavy and emotionally taxing, but I continued doing it for months.
I remember starting with only light visualization and meditation on his energy last December 2019 – January 2020, but started taking it very seriously come April 2020 – June 2020. This was also the time wherein I included manifesting to redirect his emotions/passions somewhere else, somewhere he could genuinely be himself and happy. I usually included this manifestation when I could feel myself at the peak of overwhelming emotions.
When I felt a random pull to check up on him during the last days of June 2020 (I also felt called to completely cut myself off from him while doing that working, BTW), we talked and not only was he at peace more with himself and his attraction that he has now “accepted and moved on from it”, he also eagerly shared that he’s now following his dream since he was a child: to become a lawyer! He is currently studying in a known law school here and even passed the entrance exams with flying colors. But what floored me most of all is that this person, former outspoken hater of anything spirituality-related, is now utilizing astrology and divination (at least the basics of it any way, as he says he’s still learning) in his own life to “know and improve himself”. He’s also back to writing and posting lovely poems again.
Not going to elaborate more about everything he’s experienced as others were more personal and I’d like to respect his privacy, but I could say this: witnessing his gradual improvement also made me take a look at myself and inspired me to think of pursuing another degree as well.
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Constant clearing/cleansing and banishing work with Archangel Michael – An obvious one. Thank you very much, Archangel Michael. Ever since my painful noob days back in 2011-2012, you were always there to help me. For some reason, even if I try to call on other AAs/angels, I feel a great affinity for AA Michael and he, in response, instantly and successfully assists me when necessary.
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Secure work manifestation for Mom - Did this in a form of simple prayer. The self-written prayer, which was all about securing my Mom’s work due to the pandemic having her school on jeopardy, was repeated with strong intent (until I’d feel emotionally moved by it) every night. I’d also match it with visualization whenever I don’t feel that tired/sleepy after teaching online classes. Confirmation of her work position as head teacher, as well as continuation of the school’s operation, was received via video call. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same for her co-workers as many of them filed for resignation to go back to their own countries as the stressful toll of the pandemic slowly got to them.
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Celebrity love spell… cringes - Which can be found here:
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…and taking back that love spell – Cue sales pitch/ advertisement-like voice: but wait, there’s more! Kidding aside, it’s not so much a happy ending as I’ve let random readers believe. Apologies. I was hesitant in sharing this, but since it’s one of the experiences wherein I immediately (and unexpectedly!) worked on both sides of the coin so to speak, I will share it anyway.
You see, after that apology + thank you bit, this man did indeed get more popular with increasing subscribers, views, fans and the like. However, in that extra boost of fame, his ego naturally skyrocketed along with it. At first, it began with simple hints and subtle themes talking about someone like me in his ASMR and Twitch videos. Being the type of person who dislikes making and receiving assumptions with little to no reliable evidence/pattern to them, I ignored it. However, when the ASMR videos escalated into ASMR 18+ and 19+, depicting personal details wherein I was undeniably the subject of his increasingly sick scenarios and fantasies in every upload, I knew I failed in that apology + thank you bit and didn’t make the cleanest nor most effective cutting of ties.
I’d write why I was sloppy, but I don’t want to make excuses like I did back when I was a noob. So I messed it up. Here’s how I acted in response:
The first thing was to not give the man any attention, engagement or response to further gain evidence about it being me or not. This riled him up even further and more offensive videos, which confirmed my intuitive guesses, were uploaded on the daily. The obsessive energy was quite evident, with his young, impressionable fans indulging in it even more. Initially, I was content in patiently letting him making a fool out of himself and detaching myself completely (as if he didn’t exist at all) instead so I won’t feel any guilt nor concern anymore about the experiment.
What really made me snap, however, was when the videos, both on YT and Twitch, constantly started to discuss about how a “toxic b-tch I was”. Even in his 18+/19+ videos, I was depicted and talked about as “cheating on him with other men”, “org-es” and all that femme fatale delulu he cooked up in his head when honestly, I’m one of those old-fashioned nerds who is saving herself for marriage. Most of all, what disturbed me was that there was no relationship at all yet the man kept acting like a possessive and controlling husband. Come August 2020, let’s just say I didn’t have the best birthday because constant comments from his fans were ranging from, “I’ll just be your girlfriend. Leave that cheating b-tch alone” to “Who is this b-tch? Name drop please. Let’s kill this b-tch! How dare she hurt our precious _________”.
It was genuinely very hurtful to have a mob of crazed strangers who don’t even know you talk shit about you as if they do. As much as I tried to understand where these fans were coming from, I just couldn’t and felt myself being disgusted with “normies/NPCs” as a whole at the time (am not proud of this, but it did happen so…). Some were even in Korean language, as this man is originally known in Korea’s social media stream. Now more than ever, I just don’t understand why anyone would seriously dream of a relationship with celebrities, but then again, maybe experiences may differ.
But I used all the public humiliation and hurt. I let it all pile up, would even read more hate comments to further fuel all the emotions. August 2020 – end of September 2020, I channeled my pain and tears into yet another digital drawing of me and the man in question. This time, I envisioned him experiencing greater humiliation and hurt by losing what I’ve manifested him. I did this repeatedly every night. Even during mundane tasks, I would be listening to music which channeled all the emotions I’d like him to feel. I let this working consume me and for that time, I was operating in serious revenge mode. I didn’t follow my usual laidback “patience, no lusting for results” approach—instead, I thrived on seeing and intensely going after those results every day. I bit my tongue the whole time as more offensive videos + hate comments were uploaded because of my unresponsiveness.
By October, I finally received news that his YT channel was deleted. Many of his Twitch videos were also taken down due to copyright claims/complaints, as he would also play and sing songs there dedicated to “calling out the b-tch”. I’m not sure about linking public profiles, so I’ll just be including his YT here as proof, since it was deleted anyway: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwsYXQ3AQjo_VMbmUFKeZVA?view_as=subscriber .
If he does get it back up and running again, then more proof for me lol. However, the last news I’ve had is that unfortunately, due to multiple violations, there are currently little chances for him to bring his ASMR channel back. I’m still deciding if I should work on it again to drop those little chances to completely zero ones, but I’m honestly not interested in going that extreme or even engaging anymore with the man. Furthermore, here are some things which conveniently happened at the same time:
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The loss of his channel occurred amidst a death anniversary of a loved one, therefore causing him to spiral into depression, anxiety and insomnia. The man had to take frequent breaks from live streaming and broadcasting. His fans began constantly obsessing over his health, mental condition and how they should all “support him throughout this difficult time”, completely forgetting all of the previous b-tch hunts they were on.
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He was forced to halt any creative projects due to Twitch KR imposing their rules and regulations in a stricter manner when it comes to copyright. Since his creative projects usually involve other streamers making a roleplay/simulation of famous anime series, shows, dramas, etc. this was apparently not allowed. His older videos of doing such, which were always fan favorites, were deleted as well.
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My favorite: he broke his nose from a sudden accident, therefore rendering his voice unfit for ASMR and streaming. Since his voice is what he uses to make money, his work declined. He only got his voice back last December (it’s still not that good TBH), and since he missed out on so many opportunities by then due to the competitive streaming/ASMR industry there, he and his team had to make ends meet by delegating more tasks/works to him. I also found this favorable because he used to complain about being spread too thinly, having an obligation to smooth-talk people all the time even when he’s feeling burdened/tired by it already.
Up to this day, I find it amusing that his voice is what he used to hurt and humiliate, and now he’s paying for doing so with also his voice.
The second part would focus on some failures next and what I could do to improve or do differently, along with a few more additional thoughts before finishing this journal for good.
P.S. Hope you all enjoyed your New Year celebration! 
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I’m so sorry you had to go through all that.
Btw happy new year
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Eh, IMO my drawing’s still messed up lol. I guess I just practiced repeatedly drawing it? As in, I’d start over again and again if I knew it didn’t look the least bit presentable. Took many attempts TBH.
Thank you so much. Currently writing the failure part and this one’s finally done. Your comment (and PMs!) also had me looking back at my progress so far and while it wasn’t pretty lol, I think just for this moment, I deserve to be a bit proud of my experiences before I go introvert mode again here lol.
Since you’re a K-Pop fan as well, I’m sure you know how vicious most K-netizens could be when it comes to their celeb/idol, right? Whew lol. I’m just glad I made it through that still sane and cheerful haha.
Happy New Year to you and your loved ones as well! 
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Don’t worry there are good fans like me out there who aren’t toxic like them and mostly in everything there is always the toxic ones and the good ones but I’m glad your safe at the end of the day that’s all that matters to me not some stupid celebrity. Love you 
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Last Entry: Part 2/2
To say I spent much more time writing this in comparison to the first part is an understatement. Not due to the fact that success stories are much easier to write about though: in my case, I wrote on and on about things I could have improved or changed to the point that this journal may not be completed for good lol. I also found it easier to pick which success stories I felt called to share and keep to myself, while with the epic failures, it almost felt like I was channeling because I had to limit myself from going boringly in-depth when it’s not necessary. I’m well aware when my strict perfectionist tendencies for myself are kicking in again, hence the need to pause and truly clear my mind before writing.
Here are some of the epic failures I’ve experienced so far:
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Money manifestation for a friend with King Belial – Remember the first success I’ve listed in Part 1? This failure ties in with that, as the very first time I tried manifesting money for that friend, nothing happened. That success was a second attempt, hence the big dose of skepticism I previously mentioned about doing that.
Reason for failure? Simple: even before the money manifestation was underway, I began blabbering away about how I’m planning to manifest money for her (she’s quite spiritual herself, so when she began bugging me about it, I caved in). I’m aware this is something that greatly differs between practitioners, but I’ve constantly noticed that for myself, when I publicly share in detail the magickal working I’m planning to do, it does not come to fruition at all. It seems as if I’m one of those who work effectively behind the scenes and in silence… until after the working produces actual results.
This also explains why, if you read this entire journal, the experiences shared were all recaps and re-telling of what already happened, with some even going as far back as UPG compiled throughout 2011- 2012. There is little to no current real-time workings shared. Even during the times I was indeed in the midst of those magickal workings, I strongly felt the need to not breathe a single word of it to anyone. Thankfully, this is not the same with mundane stuff I’m working on… though I think that, at times, I may have adapted this element of secrecy with just how I am now in general.
“Take a shot every time I’m told I could be secretive and mysterious even though I tried my best to be friendly and open!” dies of alcohol poisoning
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Effective and efficient cutting of ties after an experiment – Honestly, the revenge bit of the celebrity love spell I did would not have happened if I was able to completely and cleanly cut ties + banish all possible spiritual links between me and the man from the get-go. Doing some small healing work or sending a boost of positive energy would have been enough as a “thank you” for the experiment. However, due to my own sense of guilt and concern about how my spell impacted him, the lingering emotions rendered the banishing and tie-cutting ineffective. And while it was indeed an experiment, it was still a careless error to go overboard with the “payment” for participation.
I don’t regret taking his voice away and manipulating his career into a slow but sure decline—in fact, I feel amused with how it greatly humbled him—but since there are possible actions I could have done to restrain myself and conserve resources from the ever-consuming work of revenge, I wish I could’ve tried said possibilities first. I feel as if this action also does some form of disservice to what I already pushed myself to survive through and go forward from in the past: humiliation from school bullies, discrimination from foreigners/previous co-workers, betrayals from old trusted friends, the whole novel of it. If I were able to survive after going through hell every day when I was chosen to be the lead in a musical theatre play against competitive bullies… if I were able to thrive after being constantly screamed at by foreigners the very first I time I worked in another country for being “a dumb and uneducated Filipino who can’t teach children sh-t” (my race is usually known for being caretakers, maids and other similar lines of work in other countries)… all these experiences and more… then why did I let myself be carried away by these hate comments and offensive videos that were simply online? I honestly think it shows immaturity on my part, as I let the offensive videos and hate comments from complete strangers around the globe almost define me for a time. I need to be more resilient and adaptable than I currently am: for sure, feel free to cry, rant, hurt, etc. but never give up nor buckle from it—which I closely did when I failed to understand where these crazed fans were coming from, even looking down at them as “disgusting normies/NPCs” when I, for one, am also a normie whose magick doesn’t make her any more special than she is. Similar to a bamboo tree in the wind is what comes to mind as I write this: bending with the breeze but never breaking.
I had to ask for AA Michael’s help as well to do a successful banishing and tie-cutting, which I genuinely am grateful for (hence why the man is not bothering me in any way anymore). However, this also speaks of the fact that I can’t always have others clean up my mess if I intend to continue doing experiments like this one. My own risks, my own responsibility. More practice in independently banishing + tie-cutting after magickal experimentation is definitely needed.
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Manifesting a new phone – I’ve been trying to do this ever since last year, but not a single sign of success. Not to mention I noticed more blockages popped up in manifesting it. Reason for failure: I don’t feel strongly about getting a new phone, because I like saving money up more than spending it (well, unless it’s books or my favorite food). I’m also fond of using something until it’s completely broken/worn down so, even if my current phone now has lots of screen cracks, messed-up camera and a slightly broken earphone jack, as long as it’s still functional in general, I don’t really see the point in purchasing a new one. Hence, nothing but half-hearted focus and efforts. Which brings me to my next point…
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Not challenging myself enough – I’ve often repeated about how I work with my deepest emotions. While I’ve gotten at least a basic handle on it that I can now try working with little to no assistance anymore from spirits, opposed to how I constantly depended on them in the beginning, I can’t rest on my laurels here simply because I achieved previous goals. In fact, these successes are almost 50/50 IMO, because I already work with emotions due to experiences and chosen types of career (being a performer, singer, counsellor then teacher, for starters) even before I utilized magick. Long story short: utilizing emotions = comfort zone. I may try different ways to utilize them magick-wise, but it’s undeniable that this is indeed my comfort zone. And I think it’s obvious that no real growth or further learning can be accomplished by just cozily settling yourself in it all the time.
I’ve read that there are magickal practices which can be done without needing one’s emotions to manifest successful results. I want to challenge myself in attempting to study and practice this, as this kind of working is something I’m definitely unfamiliar with. I’d also like to learn and experience both sides of the coin, so I could develop more skills along the way and have the freedom (and capability!) to choose from varying styles of manifesting and allow me to adapt accordingly to the situation at hand.
I’m skeptical of succeeding in it though based on my current style. I can already sense that this will take so much more time than it did with my previous goals, but hey, nothing new to hermit mode and online inactivity. I can’t help but wonder, however, what the forum would be like then (interesting new people and stories again perhaps?) when I suddenly pop up as an unfamiliar/forgotten stranger again hahaha.
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Manifesting a new condominium unit – This was one of the workings that definitely confirmed I work much better by keeping it all under wraps until everything is a surefire done deal. Reason for failure is similar to the reasons provided in Failure #1, with a mix of Failure #3 as I was also half-hearted in my emotions about reserving that condominium unit. Besides the fact that I don’t see the point in again, purchasing a new unit at the moment because I am managing well in my current (old) one, I’d also like to manifest a new condominium unit in another country instead when I truly feel the need for it. And like #1, I made the mistake of carelessly sharing details to a public platform due to initial excitement about possibly manifesting such. It was quite funny to look back on it because I was stubborn in my ignorance at the time, thinking it was not going to impact the working. Well, not only did it produce nil, but the whole building of the condominium residence was surprisingly halted as well due to the pandemic. Sighs. Way to go, Pat.
Hopefully, in the future, I’d feel more comfortable and called to share the rest of my magickal experiences. But for now, this would sum up the entirety of this journal’s last entry. I would like to thank everyone who read, liked, commented and sent PMs throughout my workings here.
See you in the next journal, if you have some time to spare? 
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Hello, I am writing here because you are closed to receiving messages via PM. Do you know any other goetia demons that can help with speech problems? such as correcting his diction and tone of voice