Please help me, i want to know my helper

Ok first thing is, my name is Sheihan and i am sure you know my background as far as religion is concerned, i am fifty two years never married but that is not my concern now. My concern is , i need help to identify my mysterious helper who has been helping me since childhood. I have seen near death situation which i mysteriously escape unhurt i was a problem child, at one time my mom gave up hope on me because thinking i will not make it i was constantly sick. I once had a dream in the early 80s which i quiet remember, that someone Who i don’t know never met him before took me to the sun the feeling was something else i can’t describe but it was a very great journey that guy was very kind to me, so the next day i told my mom about it, that someone took me to the sun in the night and my mom was like, what did you just say? and i repeated that, and she is like don’t ever mention that to anyone. the next time is, i was summoned into my dad’s room and i will call it an interrogation. i was a kid then but i can see how my dad was visibly disturbed about that encounter i had. we were orthodox Muslims and my dad was the imam at that time so i was giving a lot of things to drink and some was giving to my mum to bath me when i am going to bed and ever since i have never remembered any dreams i had unless those that will inform me of an impending danger or something to run away from friends or family, i have heard a voice telling me not to go ahead with that relationship i was going into i later discovered the lady was not truthful she is married. My colleagues at work think i am a magician, because three of my colleagues who i had issues with and had threatened to see me sacked have rather gotten themselves screwed and accidentally they had the same offence and were sacked. A cotenant who is a pastor went mad in front of his congregants and was carried home and has stopped attacking me spiritually and has left the house, A close friend of mine who i had issues with, later started attacking me through JUJU was maimed on both legs through an accident. I am accounting these incidents not because i am happy about it but because my life is in a mess. My financial situation is in a mess, i get psychic attacks everywhere i am, be it in a bus at work. at home from my co-tenants, my friends because of that i have no friend now even my family members. now let me describe how i feel when am under attack, i feel my ribs contract and pains me, pains in my heart and heat gathers in my chest and my stomach, pains in my throat. i have travelled to places seeking solutions without success some magicians even do not allow me into their consulting rooms when i visit them i have witnessed some loose their powers momentarily thinking i was the one. I have been to hospitals met doctors both orthodox and unorthodox. I am drawn to magic and i have been seeking the truth and i am sure i found this forum not by accident. I am beginning to see some respite ever since i started meditating with Lucifer’s enn and now Lilith and Naamah, i have received inspirations or i should say directions on how to defend myself through meditation, concentration and awareness and i have never been the same but i want thiese unwaranted psychic attacks to stop or an insulation against them, i tried invoking naamah last weekend and ask her to posses me so that i may receive her inspirations and teachings , that day i felt weakness in my body for an hour or two but now what i see is flashes of a light ball floating on my right side sometimes as big as a whole human sometime like a size of a soccer ball. I sometimes try to dodge because it is like something is coming to hit me. This thing started about five days now and i have no idea what ti is. Can someone please update me what am experiencing at this moment of my journey. i need answers please masters.

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A Rosicrucian perhaps?

Three rituals I recommend:
The Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram, Earth banishing or invoking. This should balance you internally.
The Rose Cross Ritual, to create sacred space externally.
The Middle Pillar, to draw the presence of God into you.

YouTube - search Golden Dawn Audio Tapes Israel Regardie

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Thank you so much but Earth banishing or invoking, i have no idea about how it is done. but i will follow up on the link thanks once again

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These videos can be found on youtube with the search terms I provided, with or without instructions.

Ok, thank you.

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You might also have a strong spirit and hence strong natural protections.

Many people also find they are helped by unseen forces. I have as well, and I’ve spoken to every entity in the Goetia and every Shem angel and a couple of incidents I figured out who helped me, and most I didn’t…they were all different ones it seems. I like to just thank them at the time it happens.

There are trillions of entities around us, some beneficent, some neutral, some unhelpful, and the chance of knowing the names of them is slim. But if you are protected they have their reasons, and it may be because you are going to help something or someone later, in a way that’s important to them.

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I could only speculate on what this protective energy is. Definitely intelligent and dedicated to keeping you safe. So here is a thought. Not sure you believe in reincarnation but it is possible this entity is an old friend or family member from another lifetime and they have devoted this round of existence to paying you back whatever debt they feel they owe you. From your experience description it’s a loving energy. Of course I’m not addressing all the aspects of this

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