My self progression journal


#21

3 days!
I have noticed that am eating way too much! It would be a miracle if I don’t gain weight… overdosed on chocolate… still doing this so cold offering for Belial :rofl: might be why am supper hungry…
Last night I was trying to find my patron guardian demons if I have any! I scanned the 72 sigils with my hand in the dark! I was yawning sometimes on Asmoday sigil! Still not sure about it! I felt some heat from some too? Hmmm! So I ended up asking Lucifer’s help lol! So I got a visit from someone! Still don’t know who he is! He was wearing something traditional! Was trying to get my attention! A horse was involved! It spooked me! He laughed and just walked behind me trying to communicate! He was singing! He dropped my family name! Acting like he know me? So that got my attention! He was asking when he can call me and he wanted to send some traditional sweets! If I get that specific sweet in reality it means am not delusional! :rofl: a proof of sanity I would say! He didn’t give me a name… I guess time would reveal this…
From 3am to 5am I think Belial was toying with me? Not gonna go into details but meany meany meany… :tired_face: tease such a tease…


#22

2 days!
So I contacted Prince Orobas! I felt everything was a still! His energy is nice and loveable. I don’t think I saw him but Dean from supernatural was involved in the dream! The dream was something about the earth. For now am fooling around with horse drawings untill I land on something! I’ll have to call on him again tonight.
:rofl: I don’t think I have a guardian demon yet but I know King Paimon is talking care of me! Invoking him at the gym is weeeh! Yeah am loving it!
Am still on my quest of finding who was that! Orobas didn’t indicate anything yet so it’s not him probably! I can’t identify who’s who yet so it’s just a mess of energies! All I can tell is if I feel safe or threatened. Someone handed me a sweet today but it’s not that specific one so still waiting :rofl:


#23

1 day!
Last night I was kinda anxious! The light flickered and felt an energy! I knew who! I was high on energy! I slept late! Everytime I relax I feel my chakras acting up from the energy thrown toward me! I felt the drilling on every main chakras and the secondary head points! It was intense pressure.
Lucifer was with me all night! King paimon too! Orobas didn’t show up! My body hurts like I was thrown of the roof… my kundalini acting up and my spine feels weird! when I slept I heard Lucifer say “It’s almost time”… I need to remember but am beaten and my brain is BBQed!
he was telling me to be ready! if this is a hallucination am gonna be heartbroken.
oh also he said he approved my last post! And that everything is fine!
ok so in the dream I was also hungry and wanna eat food! He told me not to go near meat! It was weird! Like I shouldn’t eat when I come home today because the lunch usually have meat… :sweat_smile: this will be hard since I dont eat vegetables or fruits!


#24

0 day! This was a trip! A painful one…
Yesterday I was tired and drowsy all day at work… didn’t eat meat as instructed but was hungry eating carbs and chocolate… Am fucking up my weight loss plans… went home and snoozed. As soon as I relaxed I started to vibrate intensely.
Belial and Lucifer was there! I knew because their names popped in my head! And some mixed sigils with Belial sigil in it! I heard talking and I understood it somehow! Every sentence I get excited and cut the connection because I am aware and not actually in a trance! They stopped talking so I can relax into sleep. A moment later the floor dropped and felt like I have a fever and sweating in bed! They did something that felt like warm energy wrapping me! Idk what was going on but felt my blood was boiling! I told them I can’t take all this! Belial said “I know you can take it”.
I think there was 3 sum porn video playing in my head! :rofl: I know this wasn’t what’s happening but they where trying to make me feel better about burning alive? Felt like dont think just keep watching moment?. It was painful…
When it’s done I woke up hot and sweaty!
I feel heat radiates from my skin! I see mirage on my skin… Like a heat wave on my skin!! It has some blue dots too sparkling like shimmer. I am hallucinating! It might be the fever talking.
I haven’t had lunch and it’s dinner so made noodles! Must avoid meat at all cost not sure why yet…
I remember Lucifer chanted “shibaad shaad shiraah”. Am not sure I got it right! he do chant sometime when he does something to me… it’s like casting a spell? Everytime he said it I burned hotter! it’s the first time I actually remember something he chanted! I usually forget it but know he chanted.
After dinner I got tired and drowsy so I went back to bed. King Paimon was around last night too! My left hand was vibrating like I was holding on a strong vibrator! I slept feeling too much energy! I got a lecture on clearing my head chakras! He showed me every point! I think putting my right arm fingers around each ear at a time and on the middle off my head! Make the energy flow from my fingers! My ears are hurting today and my head too… when I woke up at night I saw the shadows! Like a human shadow! I was awake… I thought am imagining because I only see it with my left eye… it’s like my left eye in the astral and my right eye in the real world. After breakfast it’s gone but the pain still. Like my eye burning me and hurts when I look at the sky! Lol I might be going blind on the left eye! Or it’s the shadows! The buzzing sounds in my ears gets louder and then some gibberish idk… my skin is so sensitive even my clothes hurts it… I need to adjust my self so more meditation to come…
I might not call anyone today and just chill? I am eating way too much like a starved animal…


#25

I got to channel Orobas and saw something like human unicorn in my head! I am getting images! Awesome!! So I made what I saw in my head! He had a lance with him I believe! So I believe he is not the entity that was coming to me! :thinking:
I am on my quest of trying to find out who is that entity that comes to my dreams looking like an Arabian guy! Oh boy! Such a charmer! I think am hypnotized… This time I printed the drawing I made and wrote a letter on the back asking him to tell me who he is! I left the paper inside my pillow. He came to me again! Another person was talking to me so he pushed him away to get my attention! He said “my love do you need anything”. :heart_eyes: Huh! What! I can’t deal after that! He got me feeling like am looking for my Cinderella! He disappeared! Oh no! He was just invisible!
I was in bed when I got my awareness and felt invisible field touching me! It was like air! I still have no idea who is he! But he knows me! When I think about the invisible thing I remember how King Paimon came off with the same field! But he can’t be!
I woke up laughing like crazy! Is this a game? Am I crazy? Feels like am in a fantasy drama looking for my Cinderella! Why… just why… :sob:
So when I went to sleep again I heard the name “Azazel” in my ears! My clairaudiance improving! Yeah I couldn’t stay in bed! I woke up laughing again! This is crazy! Azazel? No way! Where do I hang my head? :exploding_head:
I think it’s a Djinn or a familiar or one of my companions! :rofl: please let it be one of these! If it’s Azazel I’m screwed.
The next dream was scary… my auntie questioning me about the drawing I made and fighting me over my diary thinking I have a boyfriend! She was like screaming “WHO IS HE? WHATS HIS NUMBER?”… :sob: I was crying “I wish I knew, I just wish I knew”… :no_mouth: my diary is full of magic! I can explain having a boyfriend and be punished for it, but how to explain the sigils, notes and blood drops in my diary?! Yeah! Good thing was just a dream…


#26

So am taking notes:
The chant Lucifer chanted to me had a Sheraah in the end so yesterday I saw this!


And now she’s on my Netflix! Too much coincidence to ignore… was it an enn chant for She-Ra?

Another note about the numbers I still see! :thinking: am I paranoid?

So yesterday I couldn’t sleep early and was thinking of the qliphoth… I know Belial wanted me to do it but I knew nothing about it back then… so last night at almost midnight I chanted the first sphere… and the link of my experience!


This morning when I meditate my head hurts more! Feels like tumours behind my ears and the base of my head! Something got me to try the chants again so I did! I got 50% relief!

I know I jump into things blindfolded so I asked King Paimon for guidance… :rofl: “just because” will get me no where… feels like I need to find something before I continue…

Another side note! Check list to see and draw!

Lucifer appearance: a blue Harlequin figure, tall and looking like a little like David Bowie.
Belial appearance: robed figure. hood reveal a young man with medium length black hair, a short black moustache, and a neatly trimmed black beard.
Asmoday beastly appearance
Plans to get to know Andromalius and Bune

:hugs: this girl is busy busy busy!!! :expressionless: and he said am not a witch!!! IDC what am I!!! If I feel like doing it “just because” I’ll do it!!! It’s enough reason for me…


#27

The first sphere made me question things and drained me… I looked in to the Kabbalah initiation too! Qliphoth initiation needs some convincing! I wanna tap into everything I can reach to!
I felt drained and thought I should lay low from magic but couldn’t hold back from calling Lucifer for too long! 2 days and caved the third lol! I think I am addicted…
I did some readings but not enough… kinda skimmed some pages lol! Also 12:12 was everywhere… if am right it means am on the right track!
I thought about calling the entities from Mastering Evocation E.A. so I gazed on Sastan and asked for help to improve my abilities since I don’t really know how to use them. When I made the other entities sigils, Mepsitahl sigil made my ear buzz high pitch noise! So I think I should start working with her too.
I have this urge to call the 72 demons on one day and go insane putting blood on everything! That’s just a crazy talk! I already did some weird shit that makes me question my sanity. Working with magic and entities making me feel like I am in some kind of a fantasy world… I love it but I don’t wanna be consumed by illusions…
I still see shadows passing around from time to time! It feels like am wearing a helmet! Like I have a crown and a mask! Also It feels like i had an astral trip but forgot it! When I meditate I see this muscular old man enters from a glowing door! He has a white/grey long hair and facial hair! I snap out of the trance state everytime the visual gets cleared! I need more practice meditation… my head feels like a shithole sometimes lol! I have to clear my head and control my thoughts! I have the tools but don’t know how to use them… practice makes perfect…


#28

I made an incantation audio to meditate with! Using these incantations from members here!

Ish kala tampal, metsu hash’kal tad
Suhn’tal ish ta nov’ma tal da hash
Mesh ka rel luhn sim ba ta rel luhn tin sughel
On A Ra Pa Ca Na Dhih
itz mashtu eshereru azos valma eztos melamu itz ahararu ashtu
Itz almalu ‘eracall’ itz ash al’zalmu eshter alkal manu Ali zangar 'esharartu zaku
itz carda acardiasus’ haru 'eshtu malelu Eko

My chakras fired up! got some visualization going! I went in a mind trip!!! like daydreaming but foggy and real sensation! I think I had a conversation with Michael? Idk anything… my brain dosnt remember… I felt like I swallowed a dagger and it’s ripping my lungs! it was 5:55pm! The numbers are following me and am being paranoid!

I thought the universal circle would enhance things so I did this!

I heard a voice saying “omzbi”! So much gibresh I don’t understand… Google kept making it zombi lol Google troll…
The clearest thing I heard was “what’s spinning down is spinning up”. I was trying to snooze.

My body hurts and my neck when I woke up… I had a dream about pigeons… talking ones… omg… I was on the roof of a building where they live? A man brought me up to the roof saying they wanna meet and talk to me… then I was playing with baby birds! And their elder pigeon was saying something… weirdest dream I have ever had… then I asked to go back and the same man brought me down! They told me to visit them sometimes and that they are waiting! I would like to believe they where spirits? So friendly.


#29


The universal circle characters in my bed actually works! I went into trance calling Lucifer and felt everything! He showed me the Lucifer statue! But then I slept and woke up at 3:33pm! I need to work my communications!
I glitched and someone was holding me! Weirdest best sex ever I might say? Not that I know what actual sex is lol! I got scared couple of times since I just couldn’t move and he felt so real! I heard him! Lol! I tried to get up and like fight the paralysis and I got a telepathic message “don’t you want this?” I was like “mmm yea”! Then he said “just stay still then”! lol I moaned and drooled!!! That’s all I could do! He also tickled me lots! Was funny! I was like “am ticklish here” so he went for it? he stopped when it started to hurt! I couldn’t laugh! Just gasping…

I left the papers and slept the night!
My dreams got weirder and adventures! Weird talking animals? Huge too! First I was on a loop trying to avoid someone who was trying to lock me in a cage! Then 2 red eyes glowed in the dark! It said “do you dare?”. I went closer and it revealed it self! Huge talking bird or chicken but snail looking too! Colorfull! We connected and more weird animals showed up to me! Some elves too! On my way out to reality I suppose, that person was reaching me! The animals ruined him! Before I get back a guy appear and I kissed his cheek! Then woke up!
I still think it’s a side effect of the 3 characters!


Interesting Use For EA Koetting’s Universal Circle
#30

So last night I called on Lucifer before bed! Yawned alot but couldn’t sleep for hours because of the coffee I had that day! Sensitive to caffeine. I read Lucifer’s litany to strengthen the connection. 2 hours later before midnight I find myself chanting King Paimon enn! Lol my plans to sleep went somewhere else. I picked up his sigil placed it in from of my mirror and looked at it for what seemed forever. Everything went foggy and I see red laser dots in the mirror. I got out of it and checked if it’s a reflection from the sockets, it wasn’t! I tried again but my eyes ended up hurting me. I felt like “that’s enough for now” and went to bed. When I woke up I tried doing it with Lucifer! My eyes feels like a needle stuck in my pupils. I ate breakfast and went back to bed! I feel exhausted but I didn’t even move…


#31

Before bed I did some magic and shinangin calling demons and petitioning the universe as usual.
In the dream someone told me I need to make a sigil to harness the clouds! When I woke up I did some searching and sketching for the sigil. This is what I came up with.


Then got dizzy and slept.
I heard a man’s voice and a beast voice. My mouth went numb and my ears buzzed so loud. Then something got in my mouth and I was gagging! I opened my eyes and I was in my room but foggy. I still hear the voices and feel something but can’t see it. The man’s voice was frustrated like I messed something up or the beast did something? I thought it’s probably because of my shinangin ritual! So I just relaxed and slept while someone playing with my throat chakra. Lol am getting used to being messed with!
I think I astral or lucid after? Well I was in a puzzle with lots of symbols on the walls! I was following a girl! I asked her “who are you?” she laughed and said “You! Silly!”! Then we ended up somewhere cool! Like another universe with weird technology! I checked my senses to make sure it’s not a dream! Colours and feelings check! So I asked “am I really here” she said “no you as sleeping”. So I asked what is this place and what’s happening?. The girl gave me some sweets and they tasted good! I used to make these when I was a child with my aunt! She said “he knows, he was here first”. I was like who? And there was a bug jumping to my ears to talk to me! I freaked out and woke up. lol!
I Am remembering so much stuff! Whatever am doing seems to be working.


#32

Practicing seeing shadows isn’t easy! My eyes hurts! I feel drained all the time but I didn’t even move! All I wanna do is sleep forever and eat… so I was just staring at the ceiling! Saw some white and black dots! Kept watching and some faces popped up like I was reading a manga but greenish yellow and while!
Tried it again in the dark and saw some pentagrams and scrambles on my walls! I noticed each time I see something and try to lock onto it my ears ring louder.

So I decided to see Bune last night. Worked on some visualisation and snoozed by 8pm! A guy came in bed slept behind me back to back! He said “is this fine, am not doing anything I don’t wanna be in trouble”! Then a woman came to talk to me! Idk what she was saying or how she looked like because I was gliching in bed! She sat on the side of the bed and held my hand! She was wearing white and her hands were soft! I said “what are you talking about”. She said “shshhsh it’s okay”. She said something about 4? I said “WHAT 4 No am still at 1”! I thought she was talking about the tree spheres.
I think the guy is one of my companions? Idk! He was tall in his 30s? Grey hair! He seemed friendly and acting like he doesn’t wanna scare me away?

I woke up at 11pm hungry for chocolate! Yeah good luck trying to lose weight… When I woke up in the morning I couldn’t remember anything… I feel like something is on the back of my neck like a cushion! Am glad I took notes so I can recall something atleast!

I looked at some of V.K. Jehannum videos and he got me thinking!
He says you can never be prepared to see! Entities can show up if they wanted to but they care so much about not overwhelming our brains! We can ask an entity to train us by showing up on the corner of our eyes! When they see that we are ready they will start showing up! But still we will be freaking out!
So I think that’s why we need the theta gamma sync! So we can hold on to our sanity! Or dream/astral! To separate our reality? Real life/ magical life? It’s like meeting them halfway.
Lol I know I will freak out but atleast I have a safety switch or a blanket! Woho! Life will be fun!

Crazy town here I come :clown_face:


#33

I decided to do this initiation rite to solidify things more and I have heard it enhance the psychic abilities! Tomorrow is the last night of initiation for me!

Doing some shadowmancy to get over some fears and strengthen my self! Getting to know my shadow self! It’s scary locked in a dark room… I can’t stay long yet! Sorry my shadow self… baby steps!!!

The invocation of King Paimon is intensifying everytime! This time at the gym again it was oh my! FIRE! The machine glitched and my phone lol! Nothing bad happened but his presence was more noticeable in me! So that was fun and motivating! Burn that fat baby! :rofl: I got dizzy and almost puked after the session!

My memory is hazy… am missing stuff! Hmm…


#34

:thinking: it seems that my last couple of dreams all tunnels of some sort! Portals and weird dimensions… the floating sensation is more often…
Trying to see Bune! I have to try harder! If feels like I got her aspect unlocked? So maybe I have seen something and just forgot again… freaken memory issues…
Been going through V.K blog alot lately! So much to learn! The thing is after I read something I forget it… I need more memory in my head… Lol!
Looking at my shadow self in the mirror! It didn’t move yet or am running out too soon! Too dark and spooky…


#35

Can you be initiated in to the Qliphorth spheres without knowing it?! I started the second sphere but where I feel like am at is somewhere else than what am working on! I get this urge that I need to do something dedicated to this in some way. :crazy_face: time to get high on Qliphothic energy!

I am sure I have seen something from Bune! She showed me her sigil but not the one that have a face but the other more liny one! I am wondering if I should be using that sigil instead!

I traced all the 72 demons sigils and planning to inke some when it feels right!

My head chakras vibrating more than usual! :thinking: hmm! Yep! Doing multiple things is overwhelming! :sweat_smile: let’s see my limits!