I feel AMAZING.
I tried to get down my priorities, what I need to focus on. I knew, at some moment, while raising kundalini’s power, i know I had to really work through how I felt when I saw Sam.
I was afraid to look at him out of shame. A lower instinct made me hurt when I saw him. But Belial helped me work through it. I knew, though, as I sat to raise my kundalini, I knew I’d meet him minutes after, as it was obvious from the course of events.
I knew it. I didn’t know when. I walked along in mild regret, through the library entrance and almost out of the library. I saw him, trying to come into the library, face to face, eye to eye. I felt pain, and he turned around and left, good at making no emotion on his face. Like he usually does to cope. But then, I stopped feeling pain immediately after. It was only shock.
This… means SO MUCH to me. I felt, fine. Even around him. THe pain was dull and waned immensely, immediately. And then I was okay. I felt fine. and then, I felt amazing. I felt like my entire body was alight, like I really did the right thing, and that it was necessary to continue.
I knew at this point that it was basically ending. I ended it myself, within me, and I am still doign this, and I realized that my overall opinion and feel for life, living, and being a being on this earth improved, then my experience immediately improved, I realized old manifestations were working out in other places in my life, minutes later, involving personal skills being refined, and that I was the source of my joy, more than ever before.
And I’m content. I really am, and I realize this small set of events today was world changing.
Thank you, Belial. Thank you, Lucifer, and Gabrielle, and Michael, and all of my friends. Thank everyone here who interacted with me. Thank all of you. Thank you so much, even if we never agreed on anything and were always yelling at each other; thank you, thank you, thank you sooooo much.