Hello everyone,
Wasn’t feeling of introducing of myself first, because i think i’m not that interesting…but a girl got to do what she has to do 
so here is “small” summary about myself.
First of all i want to apologize you all for my bad english becouse it’s not my speaking language. Hope you all will understand what i’ll be writing
For real, i don’t even know where to begin talking about my “magickal” journey, becouse i think it has started even before i was born and there are many very strange paranormal things that happened to me in my life that i’m still trying to figure it out…
Quick summary: been haunted all my life, my whole family died in a very weird tragickal ways and those fucking demons now still trying to get hold of me, and now i’m fighting magickal wars with these weirds entities who have red eyes and black figures i call them “shapeshifters”, they won’t fucking leave me alone…i think it’s maybe kinda of my fault, becouse i can’t stop thinking about them…but i don’t know for sure what the hell those spirits want from me. So, i’ve been haunted all my life, seen some fucking strange shit and entities, been drawn to magick my all life from very little age now i’m old (25) years old and still trying to “find my inner power and resistance”. Have been reading many different books on magick and practised some things just to get screwed again by the spirits and succubus shapeshifters. At some point i wanted to leave “magick alone” and do not practise it anymore, but at this point it’s too late and my foot is one place in this world and other in spirit world. I hear and see spirits all the time. It’s kind of annoying actualy and i cannot wish away my powers. So much for “small introduction”. Actualy i can talk for hours and hours about all the strange paranormal things that happened in my life. It’s just too much to write here, i just don’t know how to make “short introduction” of all the scary weird things i witnessed and saw in my (tragic?) life. Oh, and also i joined and did the Shemyaza ritual of the Watchers wich was in (february?)…not sure now if that was a great idea, becouse i maybe just sold my soul and after my death (according) to the book i’m reading now, i will be slave to that spirit and have to be a “familiar” hope that’s not true and our pacts with these spirits won’t make us slaves to them after our deaths…oh, and not so long, i have been fucking POSSESED literally. It was my first time in life and it was fucking scary when a freakish black figure suddenly came into my room and jumped into my body, i almost got back control of my own body. After the possesion i try to be more careful with spirits and what i 'wish and ask for" . Becouse after possesion of that unknown spirit my mind got very fractured and i almost lost my mind. But i’m still fighting. I made some fucking stupid mistakes, but i’m still fighting everyday for my survival and learning everyday something new. There are times when everything that is happening to me is just to too much and i feel like givin up, because i have no people near me to make sense of what i have been through and understand or believe of my experiences.
Thank you for your time for those who will read this mess of an introduction
Thank you for doing an introduction, and welcome.
Hi and welcome to BALG. 
Thank you
Hi, thanks.
Welcome. Whaf does your name mean?
Oh, come on, let’s not come down too hard on ourselves. I’m sure you have a lot to offer the forum.
Welcome, you’re among good people here. There’s a great deal of info available, use the search function to find it. If you can’t find what you’re looking for, feel free to ask the members here.
It doesn’t actually mean anything, i have “created” it in my mind long time ago and now i just kind of use it sometimes as my “magickal name”. Maybe at some point i figured it out inspired by stone amethyst , but not exactly…
thanks for asking
Oh, thank you so much for your sweet and nice words and for welcoming me here 
now i’m happy that i finally registered on here, becouse for a long time i thought about it, but hesitated. Now i see i made the right decision for coming to this forum. Thank you 
Well, you put some heart into that introduction so welcome.
Where do you hail from?
Thank you. do you mean where do i live?
That is correct.
Now i’m based in spain.
I have answered your question already before, can’t you see the reply?
anyway i repeat
It doesn’t actually mean anything, i have “created” it in my mind long time ago and now i just kind of use it sometimes as my “magickal name”. Maybe at some point i figured it out inspired by stone amethyst , but not exactly…
I must have missed it. It looks like I must have really upset you too. I’m so sorry.
No, you have not upset me at all, don’t be silly, everything’s fine 
You sure, my dearest? I’ll apologize again just to make it square. My sincerest apologies.