These mergings have happened at least 3 times now. Prior to Kali coming to me I was considering evoking a Hindu Goddess but wasn’t sure who. Well Kali came to me instead of me evoking her. The first 2 times she invited me into her. I’ve never had that happen before. It was a completely different experience but I felt her strength and feminine energy. I’m not going to share what happened the first 2 times because it was weird af. This last time though I actually learned a lot. I decided to contact her this time rather than her just coming to me. She doesn’t want me to share how I contacted her so I won’t share that part. After she got here she said it was time for me to take her into myself. She also warned that once this connection is made, it’s permanent. I am basically taking a piece of her to aid me. I accepted and we merged again. The other 2 times I actually went into her. This was way different. The connection was much more clear. I could hear her and see her thoughts.
Then she told me to follow her. She took me to a desert. It was night time. The sky was clear and stary. There was already a fire going. Once we got there a Native American man was already there, waiting. This person was Azrael. Now Azrael and I took a break. He stopped by to check on me from time to time but we hadn’t really spent time together, talked, astral traveled, or had any sexual occurrences. It’s been like that for about a month, give or take. Kali walked into view after a few minutes. I didn’t have a form. I was just a ball of light. They started kissing and removing each other’s clothes. Kali then told me that the woman there wasn’t actually her. It was a blank vessel for me to be in for the lesson. I obeyed her and entered it. Azrael laid on the ground and told me to get on top of him. Honestly it felt a bit strange knowing Kali was there but I obeyed.
Next Kali told me to look past the human act. She told me to look up at the stars and focus on my thoughts, not physical pleasure. I did and was suddenly transported to a library. Azrael and I were sitting across from each other and we were having a conversation. The thing is our words came out of our mouths and went into each other. The words would go wherever it pertained to the conversation. So for example if he said I love you, the words came out of his mouth and went into my heart chakra and vise versa. This was the best conversation I ever had in my life. One thing I really liked that was said was that when it comes to meditation I’m supposed to observe, not force. Which I’ve heard that before along with some of the other things he told me but it was different this time. I feel like I actually internalized the words.
When the conversation was over I was suddenly back in the desert and was at the point of orgasm. This was the most intense orgasm I ever had, more so than that sacral mess Azrael did before. All I could do was lay on top of him while he held me. I actually tried to stop it or block it because I was worried I was going to wake up but Azrael told me to just let it happen and Kali told me to quit being stubborn. It seemed to last a long time but it finally ended. When I was a bit more calm, Kali coached me through a few more conversations. From a human view it would’ve looked like a kama sutra lesson but in actuality we were having deep conversations. When it ended it seemed to have lasted hours, like maybe 3 hours. But when I woke up and looked at the clock it had only been 15 minutes. I learned so much from this experience. It was extremely intense though.
Honestly I have no idea how that works because I’ve never done it before. She did say she was giving me a permanent piece of herself. What that means I don’t know. Could be literal, could be metaphorical. Maybe she wanted me to retain certain thoughts? I’ll share if I find anything else out about it. I know my household has been chaotic since it happened though so she probably is still around here somewhere.
Sounds metaphorical as if it was a literal merge it would be a one time thing unless she ripped herself from you each time which would basically show as damage on your energy system. Though also be energy as well.
Ok so the first 2 times I went into her. Is that “merging” too? And this last time she went into me, is that “merging” the same as like possession or invokation?
If it was a soul merge yes it would of been permanent and she’d basically be Kali incarnated, which isn’t impossible but based on the statement of it happening more than once it doesn’t seem the case.
it sounds like form of invocation in my honest opinion where you temporarily took on her essence and vice versa a temporary moment of being one to a degree.
Ok makes sense. I’ve never done anything like that before. It was strange. She said things too like I am you and you are me. Do they always say weird things like that? My chest has been hurting like hell and my husband and I have been arguing like cats and dogs since it happened. No idea what any of that is about though. I just feel like I’m filled with chaos and it’s surrounding me.
I mean I’ve witnessed similar which is why it has my attention now that you said that lol, so not so much strange as interesting to look into to see if the similarities are what I think it is.
So far just knowledge. I don’t know what else is supposed to be gained. I haven’t really been looking for anything. Heck, I’ve been just trying to survive day to day life lol. So, if anything else comes from it I’ll let y’all know.
In my personal experience when you invoke an entity a piece of them lingers with you. Many times I’ve gone to Freya in either invocation or evocation and wound up fighting with my spouse after. I chalk it up to Freya’s warrior side and Kali is also a warrior goddess of chaos. So to me this makes sense
I think of invocation as training wheels to nurture talents of that specific spirit within yourself and so as a result you may find your life patterns start to reflect theirs.
The burning in your chest could mean that your heart chakra was the most stressed from the experience and where you can focus to tap into Kali further. I also recommend taking breaks with Kali and taking time to heal your heart chakra in between sessions. (A heart chakra out of balance can also cause disharmony in our life)
And finally yes many spirits say that all the time. They are present both inside and outside of us at least in my personal opinion.
By tapping into an external Kali and invoking her you will come to find your own inner Kali and then you graduate
