Yea, at somepoint in life, i didnt want to feel anymore.
I’m glad you’ve looked to them there both wise and willing to help a human out while more then willing to share love. I’m sure it will be fo the better for you that there part of your path. It’s been nice conversing with you Sen. I hope that your over not wanting to feel emotion that what ever was hurting you that you wanted to go away has passed and that your ready to feel the good again. It sounds like giving the info I’ve gotten from you that you have a different source of emotion now. You haven’t talked about anything bothering you besides the stupid people that think asain means you created the virus. So I can assume what ever was hurting you has either passed or you just decided to not open to avoid the possibility of feeling.
Im at peace now lol, i do love myself.
Whatever happens happens lol 
It was good talking to you too
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I’m glad you feel at peace now. I feel peaceful now days but I long for a better life spiritually and physically. I hope that working on the spiritual will allow me both I know they can help I just don’t know if I’ve earned there help I’m honestly hoping they will remember the love I’ve given and take pitty on me forgiving me for all the false thing I was lead o believe/ say because of my past mental capacity I hope they will welcome me the same as they did befor all this happened.
I believe that spirits seek us and not the otherway around, hence why we get the “urge” to do something.
I’d definitely say we seek each other, for example one of the last things I said while in meditation the night I met Brunhild was how lonely I was then minutes later she appeared again. Then after so long without her I’m trying to figure out how to make her come back on here and poof she does like magic she just re enters my life.
Your right, it takes 2 to tango.
They can give you an urge to seek something but it is ultimately up to you, if you choose to seek it or not.
I’m over here doing the tango your over there with a Congo line 
. Im gonna try to be receptive hopefully I’ll seek out what ever it is they wanted for me slash us. I’ve had homeless friends that swore the spirits would tell them where to go to find good stuff like they were servaying the area for them. I used to be able to move my arms and make huge trails it was fun. I think I’ma try to get my roommates add meditation I have it but they won’t give me what he has because they say it’ll interfere with my meds so sounds good to me only hard part is he wants to sell them and I want them free I’ll probably just trade him food for them.
Best advice i can give you is trust your heart when you do things, everything else will come with it. If it doesnt feel right, dont do it. Instincts, intuition…etc trust those. Thats what my babies tell me lol.
I definitely try to trust my heart but I’m still trying to get over my paranoia I have horrible thoughts out of nowhere just trying to hurt my frame of mind or to make me not trust. Like I’m picturing me and Brunhild then I’ll have the image of my arm trying to stab her or something like that just stuff unneeded. I used to rely on my heart and always give everyone the benefit of the doubt rarely would I have a bad feeling about helping someone, it’s starting to get back to normal, i just need to remember where i plan on being remember the pure intentions I used to act on.
A book that helped me with my bonding process is Sexual Alchemy. I skipped the first half and picked out the parts that i felt a pull to or what interests me.
Where’d you get it at? Was it free online or did you have to buy it exc.
Pdf, 100% free
Google Sexual alchemy, itll popup.
Edit-
Also read liber lilith if you want, its dark. More often than not, you may find what you are experiencing very similiar to that book. Liber Lilith, the guy goes through a detailed experience on rituals and things he did. I did not do what he did because i skimmed through the book and well, i didnt get the urge to the rituals so i didnt lol
Aight coo can you send a link or should I just goole it?
Lemme know if you got questions, i went straight to the pratical part and since i alrdy had names, i skipped the name part.
You still have the PDF? If you pm me I can give you my email and hopefully send it that way. And yes I’ll definitely come to you with any questions.
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://www.consciouslibrary.com/files/Occult/Ceremonial%2520beginners/Donald%2520Tyson%2520-%2520Sexual%2520Alchemy.pdf&ved=2ahUKEwih7tymxsboAhVPJzQIHZQiDzQQFjAAegQIAhAB&usg=AOvVaw37C3w62oaoOfRRVQjE3N16
Sexual alchemy, should of been the first thing on google.
I cant answer all the questions coz i didnt go through the whole book.
But i can give you my experience on what i did on a particular thing.
Edit- i skipped straight to the picture part and read all of that lol.
Aight cool ty, I clicked the link and it started downloading the book right away didn’t even have to click anything else
Good
I haven’t started reading it yet I’m on tumbler but I’m making sure the phone is tilted so she can see easier.