I just want to start this off by saying that I f***** up royally and treated a goetic spirit like a piece of s*** and fought with him.
So back during Christmas I got covid and I was stuck in my room for 2 weeks quarantining and I was already suffering from clinical depression which became more upsetting and difficult. And I made the improper arrogant decision that this was the right time to contact King Paimon which I did end up doing and I asked for just his presence and protection during my struggle.
In return I gave him some chocolates and candies, burn incense on his sigil and I always said thank you after every time I would feel his presence then cleanse the area with sage.
A few weeks after I came out of quarantine I had a appointment with a psychic medium to get in touch with my father and I expressed that I was practicing this demonology and she heavily argued against me and she warned that if I continue I will lose contact with my father and all of a loved ones. And this really shook me to my core and it scared the f*** out of me and out of all that fear I ended up swearing at King Paimon reading off Bible quotes and prayers and then fighting with him in my sleep then turning to my families religious roots (Catholicism) and attending.
I’m really upset with myself for NOT keeping a level head. And I continuously feel like more and more like a piece of s*** for treating him so poorly. Ive gotten treatment along the lines of this from my mother for all my life until I moved out at 18.
I want to make an amends and lay this to rest but I don’t even know if that’s possible so I want to ask for help and advice from anybody who’s reading this.
If there’s something that I can do please tell me I don’t like fighting or being mean/treating others poorly. I know I did all this to him.
I’ve learned that I’m an incredibly naive person and I paid no attention to my shortcomings that I constantly want better without having to put in any work for success.
I’m just upset I feel bad and I’m extremely sorry for all pain and displeasure that I’ve put you through king Paimon. I’m sorry I gave you more reasons to dislike humanity as I’ve been told you already don’t trust.
Please hear My cries for the men’s King Paimon.