It seems like our subconscious brain…
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This is depression, which you can deal with physically (proper nutrition / fresh air/ proper sleep, medication if needed) and spiritually - which I would do in small stages. You cannot be spiritually dead if you are alive, that is just the way you are feeling about things. As you say it has got worse, you certainly should be looking to speak to a counsellor - see if your doctor can arrange this. I have been in a similar state, but it will get better.
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You are probably right but right now, my priorities are very different. Anyways, Thank You 
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yw. and take care.
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Trauma… unfortunately it always works. Emotional trauma
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Yeah this would work
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Everytime…
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You don’t need a sigil, those are a later invention from when the church made it unsafe to represent a being through an idol, but Hathor is a very ancient goddess and is used to prayer alone making the link - draw out her heiroglyph from her Wikipedia page, linked above, and meditate on that, light a new white candle or tealight if you have one, and offer her some water, or a little wine or beer if you have any available:
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Isn’t that a sigil in and of itself? Also, given the fact that some variety of sigil is used in China, Thailand and Korea I wouldn’t say they are entirely a Christian forced invention.
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Well the history of using an abstract shape dates back to yantras as well, which are considered the “higher” form of a Hindu god than his or her murti (sacred idol) but the thing of using demonic sigils is more recent, when it became unsafe to use idols in Europe.
A “signature” can even be a sound, a mantra - the reason idols (which includes paintings and printouts) work for a goddess like Hathor is that she’s been called into them (or contacted through them) for many thousands of years.
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Find a guru or a good magician to give you the Kundalini touch, I only had mine a year ago so I dont know if I can do it but em, try Kundalini mantras and meditations, try opening your heart too, the heart is Daath, it may hurt a little but its worth it.
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You don’t need it. Not really. It can be ignited on your own. I’ve done it.
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Me too, it left me and the world spell bound lol
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I described my earliest method, which I still use sometimes, in this post:
E.A. did a video where he specifically described using an idol, and it can be a rock or other non-anthropomorphic shape and size, in order to strengthen evocation, maybe someone will recall the title and be able to link it here.
When you say meditate, do I need to keep reciting her name or ask her to come to me etc? Or just gaze at it like a sigil?
@Ravenxoxo If you are interested I know the means through which something like that can be done PM me. It’s hard though. Really hard. Until you get it and then it’s really easy.
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Yes, just don’t expect it to do anything like flash, it MAY of course but please don’t fall into the trap of assuming that if no phenomena shows up, she hasn’t heard you, because she will - I described that trap earlier in this post:
What you’re doing is simply praying, which is to say, sending the telepathic intent to her via repeating her name and calling on her to come to you, to ease your spiritual flatness and to begin to guide you to things that will open your senses.
One does not run to the hospital with a broken leg - one makes it via any route, and when the leg is fixed, then resume running.
If you have a state right now where your spiritual senses feel dull, don’t hold yourself back by awaiting the kind of phenomena that will come when they are open, is what I’m trying to say here. 
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Thanks @Lady_Eva
BTW does the same way of drawing out hieroglyphs to summon apply for all the Egyptian Gods/Goddess?
You also instructed to offer water or wine/beer, how long should one leave the offering on the altar/place and what to do with it afterwards?
Just got done with the summoning, as instructed drew out her hieroglyph and lit a white candle anointed with high john conqueror oil and incense, offered a glass of water in a clay glass!
