Well I’m here to present myself with my case…Yawn… Yeah, I know. Another newbie case!
I am here with the many common issues as most of the fellow newbies. With an exception, I am “gravely sick” according to the medical community. I put this in quotes, because I know it’s a fuckn lie. If I keep going the path I’ve been following, with great probability, I will have a couple of limbs chopped off. From then on, most likely I will face death.
FYI, I am not 100% new to magick. I started dabbling in magick over ten years ago. I started with Bardon’s Initiation Into Hermetics, as well as some Chaos magick. I was able to manifest one big ass situation I was craving for… and when I got it I dropped it like a hot potato. I was baffled and scared. Thinking I didn’t deserve it, and that I should go back to Christ!
Long story short, I have been incredibly frustrated and unfulfilled for the last 6 years. And three years ago I was diagnosed with a chronic illness that may lead to (some) amputation(s). I have been playing (and doing a great performance) the role of Sorry Ass Victim. Pathetic.
That will change now. Well, it has begun already. I plan to recover my health and strength. And I am reclaiming my very own Personal Power. Whether I live a long life or not does not matter to me anymore. If I can live only one year of Real Powerful Life, I am fulfilled and can leave this physical plane with no worries. Give me Real Life or nothing! I will not settle for anything less than that.
Well, I am aware that what I want will not come in easy. I will have to work hard for that despite my current illness. There is a lot to be learnt. There are a lot of sacrifices ahead of me. But I am sure I will make it. Knowing there are communities of like-minded people is certainly welcomed. Having the back up of the BALG forum community is reassuring. Thank you for reading! And may my life-long journey begin.
Note: I am not disclosing my illness. I want to avoid anyone (or anything) planting (consciously or unconsciously) seeds of doubt in my mind. I am hoping everyone may understand. If it is imperative for you to know my illness you can pm me and will certainly reply.