11-9-21 - EVENING
After work, I went straight home and retried this Litany of Lucifer, this time drawing out a new sigil and gathering up a small amethyst crystal, clear quartz point, and obsidian point. I again lit incense and put on some meditation music before kneeling beside the bed again while staring at the sigil and repeating Lucifer’s enn to myself over and over. The sigil very quickly started to fade on the page and became “wiggly,” although I suffer from dry eyes, so it never completely disappeared because I had to blink often. At some point, the paper itself seemed to begin breathing, which was kind of cool. I could see it seem to rise and fall gently, bowing in the middle and the edges lifting lightly.
After I felt I had opened the seal enough, I tried to poke my fingertip with a needle to produce blood, but I just could not do it (I figured it wasn’t completely sanitary, anyway), so what I did instead was I let a drop of my spit fall directly onto the center of the sigil on the paper. Then I recited the same Litany of Lucifer and after I was done, I spent a few minutes just quietly staring at the sigil again. I was open to any sort of experience or sign from Lucifer, but I didn’t feel anything, or at least did not recognize that anything happened, so I eventually ended the ritual.
I did place the sigil underneath my pillow that night, hoping that might influence the contents of my dreams, but again, I could not remember any dreams I had. But again, I had Kratom before bed, which might have suppressed my dreams. It’s going to be hard to break that habit.
NOTE: One thing I FORGOT happened on the evening of 11-8-21 was after a while of the incense being lit, I looked back at it and noticed the smoke looked almost completely straight, which for some reason stuck out to me. I thought in my head “Lucifer, if you’re here, can you make the smoke really curl in on itself?” Almost immediately, the smoke did begin to coil very tightly. Then, I thought in my head, “Lucifer, make the smoke smooth again.” The smoke then smoothed out and was a straight line. I asked him one more time to curl it up and when it did, I said out loud, “Wow, that is really cool!”
I’ve been trying many times to start and KEEP WORKING ON a Book of Shadows for myself that would have all my research notes as well as magick diaries within. I have long given up on making a physical book because I’m just too indecisive when it comes to layouts, how many pages I’ll need, I hate my handwriting, etc. So I have tried a few times to make a digital one, but my problem with THAT is I want to use GoodNotes (iPad app) so I can combine both type and handwriting in a single app…but it’s hard to find page templates that are ready made that I want to use. So I resolved today that I will definitely have to be making my own templates for personal use after I make a rough outline of the sections that will be contained within the book so I have a better idea of what kind of pages I need. That way I can hyperlink the PDF pages and the links will work when I import them. It’ll all technological mumbo-jumbo, but I promise it works really cool!
I sang a little bit of a song for Lucifer on my commute home today and then spent maybe 20 minutes just saying his enn over and over in my head while I drove. My only goal with this was trying to solidify my connection with Lucifer and keep him on my mind.
When I got home, I started making my outline for page content in my Book of Shadows/research book. I want to start the design process ASAP.