I’m usually not this open; however, as I was watching a YouTube video where a woman described what she went through and the healing process as an adult survivor of sexual abuse - I was triggered.
I don’t want to go into details; however, I yelled at one of my parents today for making a joke out of something that I have struggled with for years. I wasn’t rational and just went off like a five year old child who was hurt.
And when I was done yelling, I was shaking. In my adult mind, I saw the child, the teenager, the young woman in her twenties put her hands together and sigh. A sigh of relief. Of healing. I realized I was an adult and could raise my voice at the flesh/blood that created me and tell them exactly like it was. How it was. And where they could stick their opinion, actions, stupidity.
I raged. Getting all the anger out. And for once in my life, a part of my adult mind states: Fuck you and your apology.
And then the more rational side came out. I realized my parent was a product of their own upbringing. Their own insecurities. The very human side of me, the one Goddess Isis controls took over and I allowed the child inside of me to forgive. And the adult in me to to set new boundaries with my parent.
For Spirit states: The forgiveness isn’t for them, it’s for you.