am i freaking cursed?
let me tell you a little story.
i had this in my life that went down bad, i went through a break with my first love, and thats when i got depressed, cutting my self, went to therapy because i tried to kill myself 2 times.
i thought the only way out, is to sell my soul to „satan“ „lucifer“ or how you call it.
i did a petition; wrote a deal, signed it in blood and carried it with me, i was my with my friend and wanted to burn it to fulfill the deal. this was when my friend took the paper out of my hand, ripped it apart it so many pieces and threw it in the wind.
since that my life has went badder and badder.
i got criminal. i did a robbery, started consuming drugs, was involved in an car accident, had police raided my house 3x times leaving my family with traumata and anxiety disorders, almost went to jail for 2 years, now i cant get a driver license, got no hope to find a girl, get out of this little city and make friends. im really down bad trapped, and see all my friends doing huge changes in their life.
i got spiritual awakened, balanced all my chakras and love my self, i stay positive no matter what happens, and tell my self to think positive and not manifest negativity, but even though i still get fucked up everytime.
am i cursed or what the hell is going on? and could it be associated with saturn? everytime i try to allign with saturn energy, something bad happens.
how can i ever end this ?