Going to pm you
Evoked Lord lucifer just to talk for a bit because im still really down , he’s always been there for me since the beginning before i even knew how to evoke or anything about magick yet I’ve never done a proper ritual or lit a candle which im very sorry for
So i finally did it , black candle, very small offering of cinnamon cookie but its the only presentable thing i had , played the enn chant and focused
For the first time i actually experienced what everyone mentioned… i saw the sigil disappear as i focused more and more into it so i was very satisfied with that but i still cant sense a presence or communicate but it’s okay
I asked him for guidance because of how empty i felt, i asked for healing from the depression i feel and i also asked for something small regarding a financial problem affecting my mom ,i hope tomorrow is better
Thank you lord lucifer for always being here with me
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You know, the Tower in your reading can indicate extreme distress, depression, anxiety or trauma. I just thought of this reading your entry. Hail Lucifer! I still remember being dragged down my bed when evoking him, I didnt mean disrespect, just doubted my ability and laid down.
You will endure through the other issues as well. Hit me up if you need.
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Thank you so much
Yes I remember doing two or more tarot readings right before the initial breakup and they always came up with the Tower card which i had a very bad feeling from so I’ve always associated the card with incoming traumatic experiences or depressive episodes
Hopefully things get better from now on
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Ive been seeing slight improvements and thanks to Lord Lucifer I’ve gotten over my breakdown that i had a couple of days
I think in order for magick ro work you have to have complete certainity that it’ll work but still let it go at the same time… as in come to terms that if it doesnt happen it’ll still be okay… and if it doesn’t happen its not due to magick not working but maybe because there’s something better in store… ive always read members saying that but i couldnt get myself to let go… now im finally doing it little by little
Hail Lord Lucifer 
thank you for healing me and my broken heart , youve always been great to me
Im torn between pounding on the metal while its hot and summoning dantalion for a little talk and stating my desires or letting everything slowly unfold as its supposed to now
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Forgot to mention i also drew the manifestation seal to protect me from unwanted imposters or parasites juat before summoning King Belial
And ive noticed better communication with any spirit i summon ever since… ive been feeling stronger presence (even though im still a noob at that) and ive became way less scared
I also kind of wanna dedicate a day to Lord Lucifer and a day to King Belial just for talking and meditating but im scared of not being able to keep the routine going … i tend to procastinate alot and dont mean any disrespect so ill try to do it every now and then but without setting a specific day
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Summoned Duke Dantalion last night … since i still couldn’t figure out what to change about my offering and he didnt give me any signs i added a drop of my blood to The offerings I’ll give as thanks
Talked for a bit… restated my wishes and offered a cigarette
Im running out of candles for the evocations and i had a hard time finding them in the first place so now i resort to cuttting candles in half before dedicating them to a certain spirit so i dont use the same candle for 2 spirits
Was worried Dantalion might find it offensive or disrespectful since i burned my fingers trying to light it the first time
so i apologized and stated my reasoning… the half candle was pretty small and i was worried it’d run out before i finished so i asked him to keep the flame going if he isnt mad at me for using only half a candle
it stayed on for almost 20 minutea … there was literally no candle left but the flame kept going until i said my thanks and departed then it turned off slowly but itself i was very satisfied by that
Woke up 2 hours after i fell asleep and could feel a strong presence in my room…almost seeing shadows…felt somewhat scared for the first time in a while so half asleep i asked for whatever there was to depart in peace and fell asleep after
For some reason I remember whispering Asmoday before sleeping
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Keep going !! You are doing great
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Thank you! Im feeling some progress honestly and i feel spiritually stronger and more calm
Sometimes i think all of this happened so i can go through a spiritual journey i wouldnt have gone through otherwiae… as i knew of lucifer and King Paimon and would occasionally verbally ask them for protection or help with small issues but i never took a step to evoke or fully reach out to them until this happened
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I was given the opportunity and invited to a gathering which my ex will also attend … there wont be a lot of people so i believe this was given to me as a chance to get things going between us and im very thankful for it
I had the idea to petition an entity thatd influence my ex’s mind to percieve me as very likeable and attractive in order for things to speed up… i didnt know who’d be able to help me with this but a friend suggested i work with an entity I’ve already worked with before and would be better than wotking with a new entity
So i decided to work with the Great duke Dantalion again
I just petitioned him a couple of minutes ago … sadly didnt have anything on hand as an offering but i promised Blueberry tea once i come back from the date and have felt that everything went nicely
Ill also speak with Lord Lucifer tomorrow or the day after concerning that matter since i feel like he’s like a father to me that i like to talk to about everything with and ask for his blessings and help before an important matter
The gathering should be next week … hopefully everything goes well
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Forgot to mention my pet stayed with me in the room during the evocation… i didnt notice she was there at first i normally like to be alone in a closed room but she was very calm even with the candle fire going crazy and she just mesmerizingly stared at it
As soon as i felt a presence i saw her stare and fixate on a random spot in the room for a minute before going and laying there (not really a common spot for her to lay in)
So I’ll take it as an extra sign and be sure that he really was there with me and heard me
Hail Duke Dantalion
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I talked with Lord Lucifer yesterday , i thanked him for the development and asked him for help in that day for everything to go well
But honestly im very nervous… that would be the first time i see him in over 4 months… and i feel like i hate how i look in every way possible despite feeling good about my looks before
Today os also the first day i stop using sugar completely… i heard it has mutiple health benefits but i wonder if thats why i might be in a bad mood… i also saw people in the forum before use the pain they get from sugar restrictions and cravings as an offering… and was wondering who should i offer it to but honestly im unsure of this
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I just came back and honestly i don’t know what to make of anything
Hes very friendly we talked and he bought me a small gift …everything seems fine but i cant tell what his feelings are at all…
I kinda felt like he was bored by the end of it …we stayed quiet for a long time and he seemed out if it
i cant tell if he does the good things he did in a friendly kind of way just to not make things awkward between us or if he might actually have feelings for me still…im feeling very mixed signals and want to keep a postive mindset as much as i can but i couldnt help but cry on the way home
Maybe i expected too much too soon and this is going in a good direction … maybe i just can’t see it now
Would love some faith i feel a bit down but i trust in everything i did and i trust that the results are coming
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I dont know where i went wrong but everything seems to have gone back to how they used to be again
Everything was going so well the past week he even suggested watching movies together and doing stuff together but everything seema to have changed after the meeting to the worse again
I feel like im spiraling down again and this time i don’t know what to even focus my spells and summoning on
Maybe I’ll talk to Lord Lucifer again tonight hopefully it gets better
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You don’t give details on how it is everything changed for the worse again, so without that info maybe I’m wrong here, but I would say this:
You don’t know why it got worse. Maybe he felt attracted towards you again and for some reason he felt that is not a good idea right now? Maybe he’s confused? That doesn’t really mean that none of your spells are working, but to not let the 3D move you. It doesn’t matter what you saw and how is seemingly getting worse now. You have done your workings, your beliefs are aligned towards being together again and you’re just waiting for him to realise he’s crazy about you and can’t be away from you.
Of course, you know better and if this is hurting you, is up to you to decide you don’t want it anymore. But my point is, don’t get discouraged, please 
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Thank you so much for your words
I was actually talking about it to a friend and he said the exact same thing which is a new perspective i havent thought of
Yeah he has a lot of issues going on his life right now that i suppose would discourage him from going in a relationship so you’re right
He also talked to me a bit after i wrote the last update and explained some of his problems that i had no idea about so i think that probably was an answer i needed to hear to know why things are the way they are right now
So ill continue to have faith and wait his problems out … thank you so much i really needed to hear that and it really helped me
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Sounds like you’re doing alot of lusting for results. Doubt can interfere with the workings. Maybe try doing your petitions and then thinking about something else afterwards, or if your mind won’t stop thinking about how the results are going to come try to immediately feel grateful that the result is coming and feel more sure of your self and the spirits you’ve petitioned. A calm patience with a smile is a more effective attitude with Magick than desperation
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So you laid down while evoking Lucifer and he dragged you down? May I ask u to elaborate?
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I guess he didnt expect to hang out.
I didnt give up on this
Theres just ao much that has happened and other stuff i needed to focus on
There has been many ups and downs its insane…we almost got back together again we were at a really good point in our relationship but things fell apart due to his problems (military conscription)
i had to stop my work with Duke Dantalion and Duke Sallos and work with King Belial and King Paimon to try and get him exempted (what he wanted)
He almost had ir… he was so close but then his request got denied and since then he hasnt talked to me at all … i try to open conversation but it’s just back to square one at this point
I dont know where i went wrong . Maybe i wasnr good enough for the magic i was doing
I made a pact with Lord Lucifer asked him to atleast keep the consxription to 1 year instead of 3 and it just worked today… im satisfied… but he leaves in less than 3 weeks and it really hurts but i try to stay strong
Im thinking of keeping my evocation to juat lord Lucifer for the time being because these past weeks have completely drained me of energy
I hope things get better again and we can connect during his days off
Hail Lord Lucifer
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