Cant stand my life anymore

I am 30 and my life is so destroyed. My family, my stupidity and being in mental hospital destroyed everything for me. I am broken inside and cant get over what happened to me. Cant stand being me. I cant imagine myself keep on living with all these memories and scars. What would you do with LHP magic if you were me in my situation?

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Disconnect from the theory of time , realize that everything is energy , start meditating , working out , eating healthy , graititudr and dresm board , use your frustration to fuel your will , and keep the image of what you desire in your mind in the morning , throughout the day and at night

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Find a mentor spirit who can help you integrate this into your own Hero’s Journey because you can’t change it, but you can give it a meaning that’s personal and significant to YOU, so that you can let go, and build from here onwards.

I was reading an article in the height of corona-mania about how meaning is the sixth stage of grief, it was behind a paywall, but it made the point that true healing only begins when the person is able to give the loss meaning, so that it became a part of the flow of their life, and not just an unreconciled absence.

And I’ve observed that people can tolerate any catastrophe if they have a strong enough vision of meaning, whether it’s Christian martyrs dying horrific deaths in the past, or people who endure oppression in their countries, yet keep fighting the system to make their land a better place.

None of those people enjoy what’s happening yet they endure and win because meaning is more powerful than circumstance. :thinking:

If you can weave your experiences into a coehsive kind of narrative, you will be able to use them rather than trying to erase them, and resisting them at every turn in a way which just makes them dominate your present, as well as your past.

I am taking this from discussions with an offline friend in counselling for c-PTSD and she has been describing her own use of this method, as well as the article I found. I am not a trained medical professional, these opinions relate to the use of archetypes and acts of Will within magick. :+1:

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Recovery isn’t always a straightforward road. Hold on and seek out healing. :heart::blush:

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Mental hospital gang

As someone who was essentially judged too fucked up in the head from my experiences in mental care and put into “mental rehab” for it, theres two things i can tell you.
First, care wont help you all on its own, you cant rely on it more than you rely on yourself.
Second, its all uphill from here :sunglasses:

Do you have DoM? There are certain spirits that specialize in mental and emotional manipulation of the caster, they sound quite fitting for this.

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Yeah , the will is as malleable as the mental strength of the person in control , if you set the intention and let certain stuff fuel you instead of destroy you , you can flip a situation

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Saturn is in my 12th house… All these retrogrades going… I think I feel like I’m literally flipping inside my head…
What, would you advise… Magick only seems to make it worse… And its not the magick… Its Sth in my head

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I completely, 100% sympathise with you. I’ll be open and honest with you. I did not judge you, so hopefully you will not judge me. My family almost destroyed me. My own stupidity almost killed me, and I went to a psychiatric ward because of it.

One of the things that sustained me was giving myself a rigid spiritual routine to follow every day which consists of several meditation sessions (they don’t have to be overly long) to control anxiety and impulses. I also developed and enhanced an already strong bond with an entity, and found that speaking about my problems in a safe environment - to a spirit who would not judge me - gave me a much needed outlet for my problems.

Also, look at non-spiritual ways you can lessen the trauma of what you have experienced. I took up painting and I still find it extremely therapeutic. If you have any friend who you particularly trust (online or otherwise) you can open up to them; if you’ve judged their character well they could be an invaluable asset to support you.

Please, please do not lose hope. Scars will always be there, but someone I trust recently told me that time can lessen them and make them fade. I’m happy to help you if I can. Life would be poorer without you.

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Make a decision. Decide that whatever may come, the problems of life won’t break you.
That won’t necessarily make you happy, but it will give you a path to walk.

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Where can I find this article?

I couldn’t find the exact article but the concept is covered in depth in a book, I only saw the passing mention wrt the virus from that, but this has more:

If you put “sixth stage of grief” into a serahc engine, you’ll find many articles about this. :+1:

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Learn from them and make a life that you love.

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Reading about your experience has really resonated deep within, and I feel your pain and anguish. I, myself have been on the brink of destruction. A paranormal experience occured during this time through the presence of a parasitic entity. This was sent to me for a reason and through that I discovered the LHP. I then found an amazing ritual I perform every morning 20 minutes after waking. This is a very potent ritual and I know this will help you greatly:


Try this out for 7 days. I swear by this ritual. I have done this ritual for 105 days consecutively. Improving each day by 1% which equates to 105% improvement from day one. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain from this ritual. Your brothers and sisters of the LHP will help you through this :heart::metal:
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Thanks! Interesting topic. I will check this out.

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It’s not about magick no more. Its’ about you. First off. I would spend alone time with nature. Get a book and write a list of what i want. Start with basics of life not luxury stuff. You can’t have luxury if basics are not met. Then make a list of what’s needed to get them. Such as what skills do i need? What do i have to learn. Then make a list of how to get those skills. Reason for writing is so you can see the steps needed. Be realistic. Find what you want inside yourself . thats why you need to be with nature alone. So you don’t get brainwash from other people’s BS. IF you don’t know what you want. YOu have to explore activities that let you get in touch with you mind/body /spirit. drawing, couple dancing, exercise, reading, etc…

This is what i would do if i were in your shoes. It’s like a project . you go through it day at a time. don’t let emotions react. You choose to act not react. THe written journal is a guide. It’s like a heist. YOu plan everything first. Be professional about it. Check out money heist spanish tv series. It’ all plan out. And if you get emotional beyond the goal, collateral damage happens just like the show. =o)

Connect with powerful demons, discuss your problem with them and work with them to make your life better and solve your problems. This will probably not be easy for you especially since you already are in a hard situation but this will help, I have been suicidal so many times and for so many years but everything will change and turn around when you deeply connect and work with them

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By invocations day and night the demons or the old ones will align the practitioner to his or her correct version

:dragon:

I would recommend writing out your life from beginning to present. As you look back you will know what to change and be able to say your past is on paper no longer bottled up. Write ; write write write; draw and paint.

Art; music;…
Be clear and certain who you can trust when you share if at all. I would honestly avoid judgmental professionals. A spirit you can trust and a friend that isn’t a judgmental shrink.

To get your emotions on paper or painted instead of bottled up. An alternative release button would be friends.( but we all have trust issues no one likes being judged.

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All the advice that has been posted on herd is very sound. It is imperative that you channel these very raw and somewhat destructive emotions through a positive outlet. I real feel your anguish and pain, however on the brink of destruction this where you will be reforged in your own fire. Take each day as it comes and strive to aim for a 1% improvement each day which will help you with your acension and your current state. Remember “you are a living god and you are here on purpose.”

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You need the shrooms my friend…the DMT…the LSD…they will help reconfigure your life…who knows they might even connect you with someone very powerful who can help…
Many blessings

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