Can you pick where a (willing) spirit would reincarnate (such as yourself), and can you preserve some memories?
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Yes, this is the objects of arts like qigong and kundalini yoga.
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Yes, if you are spiritually advanced enough. It is believed that the Dali Lama chooses when he will next incarnate, for example, though not necessarily who he will incarnate as.
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With a ligthbody/Diamond body/Rainbow body yes