Can you pick where a (willing) spirit would reincarnate (such as yourself), and can you preserve some memories?
Yes, this is the objects of arts like qigong and kundalini yoga.
Yes, if you are spiritually advanced enough. It is believed that the Dali Lama chooses when he will next incarnate, for example, though not necessarily who he will incarnate as.
With a ligthbody/Diamond body/Rainbow body yes