Hello again, bare with me this is kind of a ramble/ dream connection so long post ahead . Now I know a good chunk of my posts have veered towards poetry/upg. But this is just something I want to know more peoples input about. So I typically work with Lucifer (he more or less popped right out to me.)I have always had weird vivid dreams. But there were a couple of other instances along with the oasis dream involving Lucifer which I can link. There are a few that I remember too if anyone wants me to start a dream journal. But anyhow here we go.
Instance 1: I had this extremely intense dream where I saw my dad standing in front of a mirror and I heard the name Lucifer Morningstar clear as day. Then my dads head started to jerk violently (like think of the saw movie style editing) then I immediately shifted into sleep paralysis, screaming dad as the door swung open and he was bloody, stone faced and held a knife to me. Then he shifted away and two shadow figures then came into the room and began to assault me, rather violently until I shoved them off. Now at the time I had noted that I could see their teeth and their eyes, which with other shadow figures I had only seen black figures or just with their eyes so this had scared the shit out of me at the time, I shoved the one on top of me with unknown strength yelling no and then the second one was staring at the foot of my bed until the other pulled these tools out and until I felt something scratch my foot, jolting me into reality literally panting. Turns out it was my dog.
Instance two: I was like really tired for some reason and I ended up drifting off really quickly and I woke up strapped down in this white and gold room with purple portals all around, I could also feel my lower part of my body being stimulated until I got up to start walking around to find the exit, until I heard a booming voice yell find her. Which basically I felt my stomach drop and something tell me to start running, I was panicking until I saw like this name title with my name on it and something involving the status of my soul and then I felt the floor give out, and I woke up. Confused, I immediately went back to sleep, which then I woke up tied down in a red bed and a gold room next to a black haired man with yellowish eyes and was smiling at me while I struggled, I couldn’t remember what he said but as he leaned in to I’m assuming trying to kiss me I jolted awake, end of that dream.
Instance three: not much I can remember about this one but I woke up and immediately knew I was in sleep paralysis (when you have it so many times you recognize the feeling). I see this black figure at the foot of my bed. I try to close my eyes/fight until it tackles me and begins to throttle me. I only heard Lucifer and that I think I am his but it sounded heavily muddled,( like someone trying to speak with their mouth closed in a fan). Then I blacked out and woke up. https://forum.becomealivinggod.com/t/horny-gods-share-your-sex-story-with-a-entity/25351/726?u=marsbars
So after those dreams it had been driving me up a damn wall. So I reached out to a demonolater who I strongly consider a good friend. And asked for a confirmation reading. Mentioning asmodeus and Lucifer especially. He mentioned that Lucifer had in fact been reaching out for quite some time and mentioned that he and I are in fact connected, said witch friend mentioned that he feels extremely protective of me and he had been trying to bring me to a sense of safety. He then mentioned the fallen angel aspect, wondering that I might have had a past life as an angel, which the witch friend had confirmed this with him and saying that I had a very close relationship with him. Indicating that the kiss he gave was an indication of our previous relationship
In general, demons / angels can have this type of relationship. Judging from my experience, being in the spiritual life the gatekeepers of the Fiery World Attakeria, I had working and romantic (I will not say sexual) ties with Astaroth. In this life, they continued.
But before I knew who I was, I did a whole “investigation” that put everything in its place.
When I had reached out to Lucifer I felt a sense of peace. (Albeit I was utterly terrified) I could feel something shift behind me and I heard a whisper tell me to relax as I felt an embrace. He has told me several times that he and I were romantically involved in my past angelic life
Well, you can work with those entities with which you yourself want.
In my case, I continue to work with Astaroth, as well as King Paimon, as he helped me learn a lot about my past life.
I had a past life where Samael was a lover of mine. It was in this past life that wasn’t on this plane, it was also in this past life where I developed resentment for Michael. However, it also is that life where Gabriel, Jophiel, and Samael were my confidants and why I for some time worked with the first two. But also why Samael punched me in this life due to a conflict in that life where Michael was a dick.
Of course I’ve come to forgive Michael and no longer have such hateful feelings for him.
Interesting. I’ve honestly never really thought much about this type of thing because of my culty Christian worldview (which still am trying to get rid of. RTS is a nightmare) of that “Lucifer is evil he’s gonna take your souls blah blah” “you’re gonna burn in the pits of hell”. But Some other things I do know is that Lucifer had been watching me a while with my soul throughout my various incarnations( I met with a psychic who said I had multiple past lives), he also stated that he was waiting for me to notice him until now. I know it seems quite cheesy upg/teetering towards poetry but it does seem real. Like no matter how much saging and salt I’ve thrown around. He always popped right back up
Something similar happened in my situation. That is, Astaroth was waiting for the moment when I would be “ready” to communicate with him. Although my relationship with him was not very easy at first, since Attakeria left him (during his life in the spirit world). Therefore, in part, I felt a whole range of emotions in connection with this.
Yeah I’m starting to get better at pendulum and tarot cards. But his energy was also quite sad when I first asked him if I went with him(and honestly his energy did hit me quite hard.). Evidently I must have stayed behind. I still do feel a wide variety of emotions about this. I can also post some more pictures cause I do tend to draw out my dreams if you’d be interested!
I find it weird that some people seem to think that Angels/demon’s are so different from us that they have to question whether they could possibly have past life lovers.
I’ve never really thought about it so much. (Unfortunately due to the world view I was raised with and general ignorance). Like I believed in reincarnation but never thought about it in the infernal and or angelic senses. But a lot of the things I’ve felt have been shockingly real, and make a lot of damn sense. I’m still coming to terms with getting rid of my old black and white worldview if that makes sense.
Yeah I have often been hesitant to post some of my other experiences with Lucifer because of getting accused of Larping or writing poetry or having a parasitic attachment.
I wouldnt worry all that much, my general rule of thumb for knowing if something is parasitic is if you feel tired/drained during and after interactions as well as general stagnation. If your not feeling any of that, and things seem netural/positive, then you already know.
Why are you worried about being seen as larping?
Nothing wrong with poetry.
Your the only one who can know/experience what you personally do. Others can offer advice/concerns/etc, but in the end you should be confident in your own ability.
Just only with that oasis dream along with mentioning the more sensual experiences I’ve had with him and that I wasn’t sure if I had permission to post them not. When I wrote in the horny gods thread I got barraged with questions that I wrote something out of the blue and I get it that they were just being cautious but it made me feel hesitant to post more with people thinking that Lucifer was being possessive of me. So that’s mostly the reason I’m worried I come across as larpy
Hmm, I have my own experiences and I definitely chose not to post them in the Horny God’s thread - however unless someone’s making their experiences an essential part of their occult stuff…of course they might not always post/post at all. Not sure. Wasn’t there so don’t know the situation.
It’s up to you whether you choose to post stuff like that or not. It’s normal to have people respond with their thoughts/question things/have concerns, this is a forum after all. So you should take that into consideration.
That’s fine! That was just mostly my hesitation to post more, and yeah I know it’s merely a public forum for discussion. So I was just kind of rambling. I do have an art journal started if you would like to check it out! I tend to draw out my dreams a lot. Not to change the subject or anything. I saw you were looking for a scan still, correct? I’m still new to this practice but I can most certainly try.
