This came at one of the best moments. I recently had a moment like this. I was going onto a different path. I took all my altars down (most part) and literally threw my cards away. I told out loud how I was DONE and no longer wanted to do anything in relation to magic. Well that quickly changed when I immediately felt very very hollow. So I decided it was time to start working to heal my problem with angelics. Well I got it mostly healed and was going back to just doing more light centered things such as angelic codes, healing and working with angelic energy.
However about two or so weeks latter I started to feel empty, like some big part of me was missing. I was drawn back to working with Lucifer again and well it went from that to Azazel. Let me tell you when I just went back to it just to do it, no big time goals in mind but to just go with the flow, it felt right.
One of my problems was I was focusing so much on this and that, that I was putting to much of my will on things. That was what blocked me in the first place. Also having that mind set of being limited also did not do me good. I proudly want to say I was able to do a very good evocation and trance work using only a sigil and some fake candles. Magic is supposed to come from your soul which in nature is a creative source. If you don’t have any inspiration that means you need to change things up and not necessarily burn it to the ground. Magic it self doesn’t have to be so limited to simply having normal things unless that is something you want.
But I agree that you should take this time to heal your self. Spend some time focusing on your self love and life. Yes you can manifest a lot but the one thing that you can’t exactly just call on command (to my knowledge) is your next phase of your path. In order to get there you may have to let go of some old forgotten baggage and heal up. Take this time to balance your self and really just let your soul guide you.
I know sounds like a fortune cookie thing, but when ever I personally just follow what my soul is truly wanting it turns out to be the right thing. Right now your soul is wanting to experience life and you should. We get this one body at this one time and you should take advantage of it. Don’t take things so seriously. Because I know one of my very bad habits is making tinny any hills into mole hills and sometimes mountains with avalanches lol. But in reality it’s because I took it to seriously and tried to put to much control into it.
A lot of the posts above are grate answers. I am very sorry, from a person that understands some what what it is like, from a father that I just consider a sperm donor, to having no real family outside my mother that if she finds out the type of magic I do she would hit the ceiling, to having no real friends or anything major because I’m taking every moment for my future. Living in a second chance place that’s run by the local Catholic Church that has its own issues it self to just trying to figure out my next four years of life.
But I do my best to practice the good old teaching of being in the now. Because it is the now that we make choices that will ultimately change that of our future. The future for most part is very much fluid and can bend and twist at any moment. With that you are the leader and the authentic owner of your future. Though some elements may just be there that are just there, for most part you have the true authority on your existence. That is something you should never forget.
So though I agree that girl is definitely not right for you especially if you want a wholesome and well rounded person to be with that accepts you and you, don’t let that her be that block to your happiness. Do your best to move on.
As for your mother do what I did, though extreme it helped me, I basically accept that he is dead to me. I made my “peace” by knowing that I did what I had to do to get to where me and my mother can live out our lives in peace. I do not give him even a thought, because the more I despise him the more of my time he gets and trust when I say he deserves none.
It may not be that easy for you and we all have those hurdles. So that is where I agree on working with someone to help you heal those things so it will free up more room for better things that will come to you. 
Be strong, know that you have the control on your life and don’t give it up to anyone els. You got this. Just take this time to heal and reflect. Start a journal to vent in and write daily passages in. Allow your thoughts to flow and next you know you’ll see things more clearly. Also remember your never truly alone. You got friends.
